A mile later, or maybe a hundred, the bus came to a rolling stop. Hoot took over restraining me when I couldn’t stand Gus’ touch anymore. Gus hadn’t tried to save her. No one had. No CPR, no rescue breathing. Nothing. I pleaded with him to save my Molly, and I pleaded with him to save Hope, and he did nothing to help either of them.
“That’s it, folks. End of the line. Bus is dead, probably from the ash mucking up the lines,” said Graeme the driver. He stood to face us all.
Gus also stood. I refused to look up at him.
“We need to bury my daughter.”
Gus’ voice lacked emotion.
“Where are we?” asked the woman from earlier who had vomited all over herself.
“I figure somewhere south of the border. I haven’t seen a sign in a while, but I think we’re somewhere in the Methow Valley. I used to ride my bike through here every damn summer, but it’s so overgrown I just can’t be sure,” Said Graeme.
It was the most I had heard the man say at once. I didn’t care what he had to say. I didn’t care where we were, or where we were going. We were broken down in the middle of nowhere and my daughter was lying four feet away from me no longer living. Jessa sat near her head with a blade in hand.
“Gus, we need to leave as soon as possible. I’ll step out with Diego and get the ground ready,” said Graeme.
“No. It needs to be me,” said Gus.
“That’s fine,” said a man near Gus in age.
I hadn’t taken notice of him until then. He reminded me of a blonde version of Boggs. The reminder only caused my heart to break a little bit more.
“But let us help. Time is never on our side.”
Gus grunted his acceptance. He turned to face me. While I refused to look at his face, I could tell that he wanted to say something to me. Instead he addressed Hoot.
“Can you take her to the front of the bus? Or outside? While I take care of Hope?”
Hoot’s arms tightened around me as my entire body tensed.
“No!” I screamed loudly. “No! Don’t touch her!”
My own voice was shrill and filled with panic. I knew my mouth had opened and I had made a noise, but was it really me who screamed so pathetically? Surely not. They were going to hurt her. They were going to cut her and destroy her brain.
“Hoot!” yelled Gus angrily.
I continued to cry out while Hoot forced me to my feet and lifted me in his arms.
“She has to be quiet!” said a short woman with tight dark curls. “They’ll hear her!”
“Fuck you!” I spat at the woman as Hoot carried me past her. “Fuck all of you!”
As we descended the stairs near the driver’s seat, I stop fighting Hoot and crumpled in his arms.
“Shhh,” he soothed quietly. “I’m here, Zoe.”
The fresh air hit me as we left the shelter of the bus, perhaps because it lacked the stench of death to which we were now accustomed. It made reality seem even more tangible and the fury of knowing they were driving a knife into my little girl’s brain enraged me. I thrashed in Hoot’s arms, but he took his responsibility seriously and didn’t let go.
Footfalls came toward us and I stilled.
“Gus, let me help Graeme with the grave,” said Hoot. “You need to be with Zoe right now.”
“Thanks, brother.”
Gus spoke with a tightness in his throat and the congestion of tears lacing his words. I didn’t want him to touch me, but when Hoot transferred me to my husband’s arms I unexpectedly melted into him and cried against his chest. He stroked my hair and cried with me. He pulled me to the ground where he held me on his lap. The sound of shovels scarring the earth grated on each of my raw nerves. Gus leaned against the bus and I leaned against him. Hope was wrapped in a blanket when Autumn carried her from the bus to the new gaping hole in the ground. We were both too broken to stand. I couldn’t bear watching her lowered into the ground or to witness the dirt being shoveled on top of her. My memories of burying Molly mingled with what I knew was happening to my precious Hope. I kept my eyes in the opposite direction and focused on a layer of gray clouds in the distance.
“There’s no ash here,” I whispered only loud enough for Gus to hear.
My throat was raw from screaming. I wasn’t sure he had understood what I said.
“No ash,” he echoed. “Just fresh air and a beautiful view.”
“I can’t keep doing this.”
“I know. I’ll do it for both of us right now.”
“I want to stay here with her. The dead can come and take me. Just leave me here,” I said quietly begging.
“Always choose life. It’s just me and you. We’ll get through this.”
He had lost so much more than I. His two children of the world. Molly. Emmett. Now Hope. How could he bear it? How could he not agree to just let me go?
“She can’t really be gone. How did this happen?” I began sobbing. “How?”
“I don’t have answers.”
He stroked my hair more firmly and kissed the top of my head. His hand trembled and in that moment I knew he needed me as much as I did him. The high pitched screech of a hawk sounded overhead. I looked up and watched as it teetered side to side in the wind, circling. When it dove to the earth to catch its prey, my eyes didn’t follow. Rather, I stared off in the distance wishing I could wake up from the nightmare happening around us. I tried to tune out the sound of dirt being tossed on my daughter’s body. Eventually I closed my eyes and allowed my body to go limp in Gus’ arms. I forced my breathing to slow and focused on listening for his slow heartbeat. Time was in the background and passed whether we wanted it to or not.
“Okay, people! Listen up!” boomed Graeme’s voice.
Gus shifted beneath me and I took a shuddering breath inward.
“We need to move. Grab what you can and we’ll follow the highway north till we find a new rig or shelter. If we’re where I think we are we’ll come across a small town called Burn in ten or fifteen miles. Stay alert. If you have a gun keep it readied. If you don’t, make sure you have a knife or something to hit them with. We leave in five.”
Sam approached us and held his good arm out for me. I looked at him just stared.
“C’mon, let me help you,” he said.
I didn’t want to get up and I didn’t want to go anywhere, but my body betrayed me by taking his hand and standing. I felt numb and trapped and on the verge of panic. Gus’ boots dragged in the loose gravel and dirt that had collected on the roadway. I turned to face him and we took each other’s hands. He leaned down far enough to touch his forehead to mine. I couldn’t feel his soul at all anymore, but I knew from his lack of energy and erratic breathing pattern that he was exhausted.
“We have to go,” he whispered.
“I know.”
***
As Graeme had hoped, we came upon the town of Burn after about six hours. We kept a brisk pace to avoid lingering in one place for too long. Our longest rest break was never more than five minutes. There were no useful vehicles on our path. We saw Roamers sporadically. Any that were close enough to worry about were taken out by those with knives or blunt objects.
We lost several more people at the rest stop we had taken when Hope’s touch had caused me to collapse. The dead had closed in on the bus and not everyone made it back aboard. Flower the little dog was amongst those who died. I hadn’t known our fallen comrades, but Sam told me a little boy who was about five years old and a teenage girl had been amongst them. The woman covered in vomit was also gone. I tried to keep my mind blank, but losing Hope filled my head constantly. I was barely aware when the small town came to view. Gus took my hand and we continued toward two small buildings on the left. They were both boarded up and weathered.
“Doesn’t look like anyone’s been here in a long time,” said Jessa quietly.
“I don’t want to mess with these buildings just yet. They look too ragged to be secured. Let’s keep going and see what’s ahead,” said Graeme.
“Everyone stay alert,” said Gus.
The highway curved to the right for about the length of a football field. When we finally got to the end the earth banked sharply to the right and on the left sat a small one-story brick building in the shape of an “L.” A sign out front read Maryweather Assisted Living & Senior Daycare.
“We should scope it out,” said Gus.
“I agree,” said Jenny. “It’ll be dark soon.”
“If we’re lucky it was evacuated before the world went to shit,” interjected Jessa. “Jenny and I can scope out any med carts for usable things. We’ll know what to look for.”
“I can help,” said Gus.
“Gus was a nurse too,” Hoot said to Jessa, who nodded in acknowledgement.
“Worst case scenario, the place is infested. We’ll have to judge if it’s worth trying to salvage anything once we’re inside. Looks like there’s two main wings, so I suggest we clear it in teams of four,” said Graeme.
“I may not be the best shot with just one hand, so I should pass my gun off to someone else,” said Sam.
“Jessa and Jenny you two go with Graeme and Autumn. Hoot, I want you with me and Zoe and Sam,” said Gus matter-of-factly.
“You got it,” our friend replied briskly.
“Priority is to put down anything we find to be a risk. We can clear bodies later. Jenny and Jess, once we’ve rid the place of the dead you can search the med carts to your hearts content,” said Graeme.
He and Gus seemed to flow seamlessly as co-leaders.
“Zo, are you gonna be okay to do this?” Gus whispered to me.
I looked up at him somewhat blankly. “Yeah. I’m just not quite here right now.”
“That’s what worries me. Stay alert, darlin’, and focus on not getting hurt. We’ll mourn together soon.”
I took a deep breath and gripped my knife tightly before taking a step forward. I suddenly didn’t care if the dead might be waiting to devour me. I could no longer sense them, or Gus. Hope’s silent words no longer reflected as emotions within my mind. Everyone I had ever loved, aside from Gus, was gone. Life was hardly worth living.
The other team headed toward the larger of the two wings as the rest of us proceeded to a set of double glass entry doors. The panes were coated in months, if not years, of dust and grime. I held my trusted hammer at my right side and took a position just in front of Sam, who carried a piece of pipe he scavenged. Both of us were still nursing arm injures so left the guns to Hoot and Gus, figuring our aim would be better with blunt weapons.
I used the back of my good hand, still clutching the hammer, to wipe away a small area of dirt from the pane of glass.
“Look, the inside is painted black,” I whispered.
“Ayup,” said Gus. “Probably someone tried to hole up here. Be alert in case they’re still here.”
“Alive or dead,” contributed Sam.
“Stay back a few feet while I open her up,” said Hoot. “Gus, cover me?”
“You got it, brother.”
The handles on the doors were typical metal pulls than ran vertically. Gus pulled on one, opening the door. From the looks on my companions faces, none of us expected them to be unlocked. Hoot covered his mouth and nose when the smell hit him. Gus held his rifle up and waited. When nothing emerged to consume us, he nodded and stepped into the darkness. Sam followed while Hoot kept the door ajar. I stepped in next. The entry was dark, lit only by the light that crept in with us. Gus turned on a flashlight. Cobwebs hung wherever they had been able to take root. Dust coated black vinyl chairs and couches. There was a small office and greeting counter to our left. A vase of flowers was only recognizable by stems that had dried long ago. Papers were strewn about and a computer tower and monitor were laying on the floor, electrical bits and glass broken and scattered about. How the vase of dead flowers had survived intact was a mystery.
“There,” whispered Sam.
I looked up and followed his line of sight. On the floor lay a body, halfway between the lobby and a smaller room. The torso was masked by the darkness, leaving only a pair of legs visible to us. Whoever it was had lost the skin from foot to knee, where it transitioned to mummification.
“Been here awhile,” said Gus quietly.
“Let’s go in a bit deeper,” I suggested.
There was only one option: straight ahead. A hallway stood before us, dark and foreboding. As we began our trek into the darkness, Hoot clicked a pen light on. It caused shadows to dance in front of us. The effect was disorienting but being able to see to face dangers was critical. Doors lined the right hand side of the hallway. Each was shut. The other side of the hall was lined with floral prints in cheap frames and windows, all of which were painted black like the entry.
“We need to clear the rooms,” said Gus.
“Let’s start with the ones closest to the exit, and don’t forget to keep an eye on the front door. We don’t need any surprises,” said Sam.
Gus poised himself to open the first door. Before he had a chance to open it, I spoke up.
“It’ll go faster if we split into two teams. Hoot, I’ll go with you. Sam, you can go with Gus.”
“You don’t want to stick with Gus?” asked Hoot.
“No. It’s not that. I just know we’re both distracted, so it’s best if each of us teams up with someone who isn’t.”
Gus looked down at his boots. “She’s right.”
We didn’t speak after that. We opened the first six doors without issue. The rooms each held three electric beds, still semi-dressed in white sheets and quilts and afghans. A few were bare as if waiting for a new patient to arrive. In one, an IV pole lay haphazardly in its side next to a bed that was smeared in feces that had long ago dried. Hoot and I had the pleasure of clearing that one. The seventh door led to the ladies’ restroom. It held a single toilet and sink and one corner was dedicated to a walk-in shower. The toilet had clearly been used several times and now held a composted slush. I left the room quickly, gagging as I ran out.
Hoot and I took the last door, number nine, while Gus and Sam went back to shut the prior doors. As soon as Hoot pushed the door inward, the growling of the dead broke the silence we had until then enjoyed. We held back long enough for Hoot to sweep the room with the narrow beam of his pen light. The creature that sounded tortured was in the back corner. Male or female was a guess. It was sitting still strapped into a wheelchair, tipped onto its side. It was bloated, much like a Hunter, but postured and sounded like a Roamer. Thin gray hair plastered to stretched, moist-appearing skin on its forehead. It had no legs. A double amputee. Jaws opened and closed as it struggled to pull itself toward us.
“Jesus,” said Hoot. “The poor fuck.”
I walked to it, boldly.
“Zoe, I’ll get it,” said Hoot.
“No. Let me.”
I held my knife tightly and squatted in front of the snapping jaws. I looked into the eyes of the creature. They were clouded and sunken. One pupil appeared silver, the other a hue of green. I sensed nothing from it, but knew it was ravenous. There was something else, though. Sadness. Its eyes held sadness. We fixed on each other and the creature’s jaws stopped snapping at me. As my face drew nearer to that of the dead, everything around me grew silent. The air grew warm and filled with the scent of old lady roses and moth balls. A great sense of peace swirled around me and filled me. As I began to merge with the creature on some nonphysical level I couldn’t begin to understand, the air was sucked from my lungs when I was torn from a plane of numbing bliss. My spine hit the edge of something hard, causing searing pain in my ribs. I struggled to breathe again while watching Hoot kick the creature’s head until it split open and oozed black clots of rotting brain tissue onto the floor.
“Zoe!” he yelled as he ran back to me. “We have to go! Get up!”
I looked at him, not quite comprehending. There were too many noises around us. Yelling, gunfire, someone screaming. The crash of metal and breaking glass.
“Get her out!” I heard Gus shout.
“Jesus Christ! There’s more coming!”
“The front door’s blocked! Get out the windows!”
“They’re out there too. Oh God, watch out!”
I recognized each voice but had trouble attaching them to their owners.
Hoot grabbed me forcefully under my bandaged arm. The resulting pain brought me out of my haze.
“Hoot! What is it?” I demanded, yelling to be heard over the commotion.
“Get up! We have to move!” was his only answer.
“Gus!” I screamed.
The only reply was rapid gunfire and screaming. Hoot pulled on my arm as I struggled to get away.
“Gus!” I yelled again.
“Zoe, get out!” he finally answered.
“Stop fighting me, damnit!” growled Hoot.
The gunfire stopped suddenly and my core filled with ice as a new scream pierced the air. The only times I had ever heard a scream that grating and full of pain was when someone was being consumed alive by the dead. It lasted far too long, finally being cut short by the sound of a single shot.
A vibration tore through the building. It was low and deep and vaguely familiar. My footing became unstable when the building lurched. Bits of dust and ceiling rained down around us and my ears were filled by a strange sensation akin to pressure.
“Duck and cover!” yelled Gus.
Hoot forced me to the ground and climbed on top of me. His weight was crushing. Another explosion rocked the building, but farther in the distance. The area quickly grew to be a mini war zone, littering us with debris. Hoot tightened his arms around me each time a new blast shook us. What must have only lasted a few minutes felt like an eternity. Eventually the explosions stopped and the moans of the dead and screams of the living and the sounds of gunfire faded, replaced by the creaking and moaning of an unstable building.
“Are you okay?” Hoot whispered against my cheek.
I wasn’t able to find my voice, so nodded my head instead.
“Stay still while I try to stand up.”
I nodded again.
He shifted his weight and took a sharp breath inward.
“Fuck,” he groaned.
“What’s wrong?” I whispered.
“I think something hit my ankle. It hurts like a bastard. I jarred my fucking wrist too. Son of a mother fuck.”
The sound of rubble shifting in the distance caused us both worry. We weren’t in a good position to fight or defend.
“Zoe? Hoot?”
Gus’ voice. He was alive. I took a small breath of relief.
“Here,” I called back. “Hoot’s hurt.”
“Stay there. I’ll find you guys.”
I froze when I heard unfamiliar voices. Someone was barking instructions. Check for survivors. Make sure they’re not human before you put them down. I saw eight enter and we’ve only got the one girl on board. One’s dead. Looking for six more.
Hoot and I hunkered down waiting for Gus. He found us quickly and with not much effort.
“Did you guys hear that?” asked Gus in a very low whisper.
“Yeah,” Hoot and I said in unison.
“I think we need to risk it,” Hoot said to Gus in particular.
“I don’t trust people anymore,” Gus admitted. “But, your foot looks fucked up and we need to get to safety.”
The two men nodded at each other before looking at me. I nodded my agreement.
“We’re here to help!” called a deep male voice.
“Call out if you can hear us,” a much softer feminine voice called out.
“Here! We’re here!” I called out.
“How many?” the woman called back.
“Three,” I yelled.
“Stay put. We’ll come to you.”
I began to shake as adrenaline continued to build in my system.