Dani had been walking to and from the hospital whenever she had time—meaning she hadn’t been called in stat or it wasn’t raining buckets. Heading home when it was still light out, when she so rarely got the chance to do that for at least half the year, lifted her spirits the way few things could any longer. She was jazzed after her dinner with Ren, but she didn’t hurry. Instead, she took her time and replayed the evening. When she’d asked Ren to dinner, she hadn’t been thinking of anything more than getting something to eat. Only after she’d offered the invite did it hit her how much she’d been enjoying the easy conversation they’d fallen into in the library. Not that the topic was one she really wanted to dwell on. The research project was going to be more of a hassle than she’d anticipated. No, scratch that. It was going to be every bit as much of a hassle as she’d worried it might be. Not that the research question wasn’t interesting, because it was, and Quinn was right, the information was probably going to be helpful, something other surgeons could use, and that at least made it feel worth it. But it was time-consuming, not her natural comfort zone, and she couldn’t let up on getting the practical kind of clinical experience she needed. So she’d just have to fit in more hours of work and spend a lot fewer doing anything else.
Venting to Ren had just…happened, and when Ren hadn’t brushed off her worries, or offered useless advice, but had simply understood, the problems didn’t seem so insurmountable.
Dani almost laughed out loud. Nothing had changed—not the whole Franklin quest, the time suck of the study, or most of all her parents’ dim view of her life—but for a few hours, the weight of it all had lessened. She’d shared a little of her anxiety and shared a really interesting hour with an intriguing woman, while the pile of charts she had to go through, the pressure of being on a deadline when her career hung in the balance, and the ever-present, bone-deep wish that she could make her parents happier, despite resenting them at the same time, had faded.
She had Ren to thank for that. And try as she might, she couldn’t find the will to worry about any of it now either. All she wanted to think about was Ren Dunbar. Whom she’d apparently asked out on a date. An actual bona fide date. As in setting up a time and place to meet—not a casual oh by the way, a bunch of us are going out kind of thing. Although they hadn’t really discussed what they would do beyond getting together after work for dinner, it was still an advance plan, for just the two of them. And not something she’d done with anyone else since she’d been at PMC. Thinking back, even before that. Oh sure, she went out with Syd and Jerry and other friends when she’d been at Franklin, but always in a group or well after hours when the only reason anyone was out was to hook up. Not something she did very often, and totally given up when she’d moved across town to PMC. Being faced with finding a place in the new surgery system and shouldering a lot more clinical responsibility really quickly had pushed the idea of expending energy on hunting for sex totally out of her mind. And now, when she had so much more of everything—clinical responsibility and this research project—demanding her time, she’d found something far more interesting than a late-night score. Ren.
She’d never met anyone like her. She’d been surrounded by high achievers her entire life, but none with the combination of incredible drive and surprising humility that Ren seemed to have in equal measure. Her accomplishments were extraordinary, and yet far from seeming to realize it, she was, instead, beguilingly unaware of her own specialness. That’s probably what Dani found most appealing about her. Ren not only didn’t realize how amazing she was, she presented a compelling—hell, fascinating—combination of quiet sensuality and innocence.
She’d talked to Ren for an hour, and she would have been happy if that had been ten. Thinking about her was almost as pleasurable, a habit she could get used to. That was new. And nice. Very nice.
She didn’t expect Zoey to be home yet, but a light was on in the kitchen when she walked into the house. She dumped her gear bag at the bottom of the stairs and went on back. Zoey sat at the table with a cup of tea and an open pizza box, looking oddly forlorn.
“Hey,” Zoey said. “Brought home leftovers.”
“Big Dom’s?” Dani pulled a beer from the refrigerator. She sat down opposite Zoey, checked the pizza, and took a small slice of the leftover Greek.
“Yeah, short night, though. Everybody was kind of tired.”
“You okay?” Dani asked.
Zoey looked surprised. “Yeah. Oh…” She laughed and shook her head. “The ER is backed up and Dec is second call.”
“Aw, no sex for you tonight.” Dani flipped the pizza box closed. “You can have it for breakfast.”
“Go ahead, have the rest,” Zoey said.
“Nah, I’m good. Actually, I just ate a little while ago. I’m just stockpiling in case I get called in.”
“Sorry,” Zoey said. “I should’ve texted you that we were all going out. I thought you said you were going to be busy.”
“No problem. I was. Sort of. Mostly I was staring at a pile of charts. Ren came by, and we ended up grabbing something to eat.”
“Really? You and Ren? Where’d you go?”
“San Pedro’s.”
“Really?” Zoey said, her voice rising a little bit higher. “That’s interesting. I asked her if she wanted to go out for pizza with us, and she didn’t want to.”
“I guess she just got hungry,” Dani said, shrugging.
Zoey leaned her chin on her hand and studied Dani through narrowed eyes. “Who asked who to go out to eat?”
“What?”
“Come on. How did this come about?”
Dani knew that look. Zoey was about to start digging for intel. Weirdly, she didn’t want to talk about Ren. Not that there was anything to hide—just, the whole unanticipated evening with Ren shone in her memory still. She didn’t want to dim the images. “Well, I suggested we grab something to eat.”
“Okay. So how was it?”
“It was fine, Zoey. It was dinner.” Dani stood. “I think I might grab a shower.”
Zoey hooked a finger in the pocket of her jeans and yanked, pulling her back down again. “You asked Ren Dunbar out on a date?”
“It wasn’t a date,” Dani said defensively. “It was…spur of the moment. Just dinner.”
“Uh-huh. And Ren went.”
“I told you, it was just dinner.”
“I didn’t think she’d be your type,” Zoey said casually.
Dani stiffened. “What do you mean by that?”
“Dani,” Zoey said with exaggerated patience. “Ren is just…she’s all about the work. You can tell that’s all she ever thinks about. She’s not, I don’t know, experienced.”
Dani snorted. “Oh, come on. What is that supposed to mean?”
“You know what I mean. She’s younger to begin with, and I don’t know, she feels sometimes like she’s my younger sister.”
“She can’t help how old she is, but she’s not that young.” Dani frowned. “And besides, she’s the same year as me in training—she didn’t get there without making it through a lot of hard crap.”
“I wasn’t talking about that kind of experience.”
Dani flushed. Ren had given her the impression that she wasn’t super experienced with women, but so what? They were just having dinner. “Why does it bother you?”
Zoey tilted her head. “It doesn’t. Not really. I guess I’m just surprised.”
“Well, if you’re worried about Ren, you don’t have to be. There’s nothing serious going on. Dinner now and then is just that.”
“Wait.” Zoey pointed a finger. “You have plans for another date?”
“Not a date, just dinner.”
“You asked her to have dinner,” Zoey said.
“Well, yes.”
“That’s a date.”
Dani blew out a breath. “Okay. A date. A simple, uncomplicated one.”
“Why?”
“What do you mean, why?” Exasperated, Dani tilted back in her chair and stared at the ceiling. If she’d wanted to dissect her feelings about Ren, she would have done it herself already. All she wanted to do was hold on to the curl of excitement in her middle that kindled when she thought of her, without asking why. But Zoey was Zoey—a dog with a bone. “Why does anybody ask someone out? Because she’s interesting, and easy to talk to, and I like her.”
“You like her,” Zoey said slowly. “Wow.”
“Wow?” Now she sounded defensive. She was defensive. Why shouldn’t she like Ren? Ren was amazing and interesting and hot. “What’s this all about, Zoey?”
“It’s just…I don’t think you’ve actually had a date since I’ve known you.”
“Of course I have. You think I’m a monk?”
“I know you’re not a monk,” Zoey said. “I wasn’t talking about you getting laid. I was talking about a date that didn’t start and end in bed.”
“Well, okay. So?”
“I think it’s cute, and I’m sorry that I said Ren wasn’t your type. I don’t even know what your type is.”
Dani relaxed. This was Zoey. Her best friend who was needling her the way best friends did. And she knew why. “I don’t know what my type is either,” she said slowly. “But it’s not about that, Zoey.”
“Oh, really? So you’re not attracted to her.”
“Am I still breathing?”
Zoey grinned. “That’s better.”
“But I’m not asking her out to dinner so I can get her into bed. I just…I like being around her. She makes me feel, I don’t know, like I’m okay just the way I am.”
“That’s because you are,” Zoey said softly.
“Tell that to my parents,” Dani muttered.
“I would if I got the chance.” Zoey’s phone rang and she grabbed it. “Hey.” Her whole face transformed. “Really? Now?…Sure. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.” She pocketed her phone. “They cleared up the backlog in the ER, and Dec is getting out earlier than she thought.”
“So go,” Dani said. “See you tomorrow.”
Zoey ruffled Dani’s hair on the way past. “I’m glad about Ren.”
Dani sighed, dumped her empty can in the recycling, and went upstairs to shower. Her phone signaled a text as she climbed the stairs. How come whenever her friends got hooked up, they thought everyone else should too?
She showered, pulled on clean boxers and a tank, and stretched out on the bed to check her phone.
Raven.
How’s the boring work going?
Dani smiled. I blew it off for dinner with a friend.
! Me too :-)
Raven wasn’t usually into chatting. She was always about the gaming. Dani was good with that, but tonight even Raven seemed more relaxed. Do you feel guilty?
Not a bit. Just…surprised.
Why?
Not what I expected.
Dani propped a pillow behind her head. She knew what Raven was saying. Good unexpected or bad unexpected?
Good, I think. No, definitely good.
Dani thought back over her evening. Yep—definitely good. More than that. Sounds special.
Raven was silent a few moments. Dani wondered if she’d crossed some line, let her own emotions get in the way.
Yes. That’s a good word for it, Raven finally said. Want to finish the game?
For sure, Dani typed.
Meet you…
Dani switched into the app and the invitation was waiting. She thought about Ren. And clicked join. Her night had been special too.
* * *
I’m done, Ren typed. You’re killing me tonight
You’re distracted
Ren smiled. She was never distracted. Tonight was a first. She hadn’t been able to get out of her head and into the game, and when she didn’t bring her A game, she didn’t have a chance against Axe. Her concentration kept wavering, and she’d start remembering snippets of conversation she had with Dani at dinner. Had she said the right thing? Had she said something foolish? Was there something she should’ve said or done? Or not?
She often had those misgivings when she met new people, especially in situations where she didn’t have professional ground rules to guide her. If there were rules for socializing, especially with people—girls…women—who she liked, she didn’t know them. She hadn’t had girlfriends in high school to learn from. She really wanted to have gotten it right this time. Dani was so much fun. And so matter-of-fact about who she was, and who Ren was. She’d never felt awkward, at least not after the first few minutes, about her age or her experience or her lack of it. She hadn’t needed whatever the rules were she didn’t know.
And she’d made discoveries, wonderful ones. A woman’s voice could change so quickly in a matter of seconds, going from light and teasing to low and husky in a way that heated her all the way through. Dani’s voice did that. So did her eyes, when they flickered and turned darker.
She could reveal bits of her past without becoming an oddity, or worse, just plain odd. She could forget herself listening to someone else’s story.
And she hated beer. Who knew she would love strawberry margaritas? They were perfect, and Dani had known.
Raven?
Ren jumped. Oh hey. Sorry. I guess I am distracted. Sorry.
LOL. I hope whatever’s on your mind is something good.
It is. Thanks.
I’m sure you’ll get me back next time, Axe messaged.
For sure. Ren hesitated. Thanks for listening
:-) Anytime. night Raven
Ren smiled. Something else she’d learned. Sharing something special was a little bit like reliving it. Night Axe
* * *
“How are you doing in here?” Honor asked, stepping inside the curtain. She smiled at the seven-year-old on the stretcher, Leo Marcoux, a pale, wide-eyed, dark-eyed boy clutching his father’s hand. Martin Marcoux, his father, an older version of the boy with a bit of scruff, a tangle of dark brown hair where he’d run his hand through it, and worry in his eyes, forced a smile.
“We’ve got a bit of a fever, but we’re doing okay.”
“And a stomachache too, I understand, right, Leo?” Honor said.
“A little,” he said softly.
“Can you show me where?”
Leo rubbed a hand over his lower abdomen. “Down here.”
“Okay. Thank you.” Honor glanced at Ren and raised an eyebrow. She’d been waiting for a surgical consult to evaluate the young boy, a renal transplant patient, who presented with a low-grade fever and complaints of abdominal pain. The transplant team was in the OR, and the general surgery resident covering the ER had been pulled for a second trauma alert. Ren had shown up in his place.
“I’ve Dopplered Leo’s kidney,” she said, smiling at the boy. “We can hear the blood flow, can’t we?”
Leo nodded vigorously. “Ren said that means that my kidney is working.”
Ren nodded. “It means that the blood flow to your kidney is working. We still have to wait for the results of the urine test, remember?”
The boy grimaced. “I know. But my pee looked good, right?”
“So far, but we need to look at it under the microscope too.”
“Right,” Leo muttered.
Ren switched her gaze to Honor. “CAT scan was backed up, but they’re ready for him now.”
Honor stepped to the bedside and said, “Can I listen to your abdomen too?”
“Yes, if you want to,” Leo said.
“I would.” Smiling, she settled her stethoscope in her ears and listened to the very quiet abdomen. Not much in the way of bowel sounds. “Let’s listen with the Doppler again—that’s the little probe.”
Leo nodded. “Okay.”
Honor rolled the gel over the lower part of his abdomen where the graft would be situated and touched the probe to his skin. A strong arterial pulse echoed from the machine. While she couldn’t be sure of what the venous outflow was like from the kidney, had it been obstructed, the arterial pulse would’ve eventually stopped. The CAT scan would give them a good view of the transplant, and with contrast, they should see more of the blood supply as well. She nodded and looked up at the boy’s father. “The CAT scan will tell us a lot more.”
He cleared his throat. “I can go with him, right?”
“Of course.”
“My husband should be here soon,” Martin said. “He had a seven o’clock counseling session, and I didn’t want to interrupt him until we knew something. Father Domingo Lopez.”
“Of course. Dr. Dunbar or I will speak to you both when he arrives,” Honor said.
“Thank you.”
“Ren, can I go over a few things with you while we get Leo ready to go to CT,” Honor said and stepped outside the curtain. Ren followed her down the hall a few feet.
“What are your thoughts?” Honor asked.
“Everything suggests that the transplant is all right. His CBC shows a shift in his white count, but normal for an infectious process. Not a lot of lymphocytes or anything suggesting rejection.” She was quiet for a second, her expression contemplative. “I think there’s a good chance he has appendicitis.”
“It would fit for the age and the history,” Honor said. “And if he does?”
“There’s going to be a problem if the graft is in the way. And there’s likely to be adhesions, so technically challenging.”
“Have you looked at his OR records from the transplant procedure?”
Ren took a slow breath. “I haven’t, and you’re right. I should have already,” she added quickly with a bit of a wince, “because they may have taken his appendix when they put in the graft. If that’s the case, it’s something else.”
“Check it. They may have left it. It would depend on where they put the graft and how pressed for time they might’ve been during that procedure. And you’re right, the CAT scan will likely give us a definitive diagnosis.”
Ren shook her head. “Still, I should’ve thought of it.”
“Well, next time you will,” Honor said. “And thanks for picking up the consult.” She paused. “You’ve been doing that a lot lately.”
“I was in the lab, and I’m often around,” Ren said with a deprecating shrug. “And that’s what I’m here for, right?”
“As long as you’re not overextending. A service is busy.”
“It is, and I won’t.”
“All right then, thanks.”
“I’ll go down with Leo to CT,” Ren said.
“Good. Call me with the reading.”
Ren went off to organize transport, and Honor scanned the board, which finally looked like it was under control.
A welcome voice said from just over her shoulder, “How’s it looking?”
The timbre of Quinn’s voice and the faint warmth of her breath against the side of her neck sent a shiver down Honor’s spine. She leaned back slightly until her shoulder touched Quinn’s. “We’re winning.”
Quinn grinned. “Aren’t you always?”
“Eventually.”
“Did Arly call you?” Quinn asked.
“No,” Honor said, turning quickly. “Is she all right?”
“Yeah, sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. It’s one of those situations where she wants permission to do something, and she’s checking with the parent she thinks is going to say yes first.”
“Family conference time then. I’ve got about five minutes.” Honor linked her arm through Quinn’s. “Come back to my office.”
Once there, she shut the door partway and gave Quinn a quick kiss. “So, what did she want to do?”
“Are you ready for this? Apparently the Billie Eilish US tour has added the Wells Fargo Center to their schedule over Labor Day. Arly wants to go.”
“Really?” Honor said. “Billie Eilish? We should all go.”
“I don’t think that’s what she had in mind.” Quinn laughed. “She wants to go with Janie, Eduardo, and four or five other kids. Parents were not on her list.”
Honor sighed. “She’s never gone to anything like that alone. What do you think?”
“Janie’s older brother’s Raymond is going, sort of a de facto chaperone. He’s driving them all, so they’ll have an adult with them. I sort of hedged…No, I definitely hedged and said I needed to talk to you.”
“Oh, so if we say no, it’ll be my fault. Smart move, Maguire.”
Quinn grinned. “I’m learning.”
Honor sighed. “I suppose she can go as long as there’s a responsible adult. I know Janie’s brother Raymond. If he’s willing to drive them and keep an eye on them, I don’t think we have a good reason to say no.”
“I pretty much agree, and there hasn’t been much in the last year or so for them to do. It’s tough to say no.”
“All right then. We’re united.”
“Aren’t we pretty much always?” Quinn took her hand and kissed her knuckles, something she’d always done and that Honor still loved.
“While I’ve got you, there’s something else I wanted to mention,” Honor said.
“Problem with one of my residents, or one of my staff?”
“What makes you say that?”
“Because it usually is.”
“A resident this time,” Honor said.
Quinn frowned. “What’s going on?”
“Actually it’s the opposite of a problem. Ren Dunbar. She’s been seeing consults on a regular basis. Not stealing cases, but whenever we’ve been waiting on the consult and there’s been some delay, she’s been picking it up. She’s very bright.”
“Well yeah, we know that. So what’s the problem?”
“I just thought you should know, because considering the hours she’s keeping, I think she’s living at the hospital.”
Quinn blew out a breath. “Yeah, she practically does. Always has. Sax never seemed to sleep much either. But that’s who she is, Honor. She puts every bit of her energy into whatever goal she’s trying to accomplish. She wouldn’t be here if that wasn’t true.”
“I understand that’s normal for her,” Honor said, “but it’s early in the year, and if she keeps up this pace, she might burn out.”
“I’m glad you told me.” Quinn rubbed her forehead. “I may have created a couple of monsters lately.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I pulled Ren out of the lab and put her into the fifth year slot because I needed a strong resident there. Plus, if she’s ever going to move on clinically, she needs to get out of the lab. But of course she feels pressured to catch up to everyone.”
“You couldn’t help that,” Honor said.
“I know. But then I pointed Dani Chan toward a research project because she expressed interest in being competitive for the Franklin. So now she’s got a double load. If I’d known she was serious about competing for the award too, I could’ve gotten her started on something sooner.”
“So you’re worried that she’s not going to be able to handle everything.”
“Dani is an excellent resident. Not driven the way Ren is, but she hides her intensity. The two of them going head-to-head is going to present a quandary when we get around to voting.”
“Do they know that?”
“I don’t know. It’s not usually an issue. Most of the residents are too busy keeping their heads above water and looking toward the finish line to actively go for it. Hell, usually whoever wins is totally surprised. This year it’s looking different.”
“Well, all you can do is keep an eye on them.”
“Yeah,” Quinn said, rubbing her forehead. “There’s a lot of that going around these days.”
Laughing, Honor looped her arms around Quinn’s shoulders and pressed close. “I love you, you know.”
Quinn closed her eyes and sighed. “And lucky for me.”