SOME PEOPLE SAY writing a book is a bit like having a baby. If so, this book was an elephant calf, as it had a two-year gestation. That it was born at all is a tribute to the unflinching support of many people, beginning with Nad Brain and Andrew Butcher. Smart, thoughtful, and always amusing, our husbands not only believed in the idea of this book, but were brave enough to allow their lives, as well as ours, to be put into print. Had it not been for Nad’s eternal optimism, Andrew’s savvy edits, and the willingness of them both to fly solo with the kids when we were tethered to our desks, this book might have been an essay. We love you both, madly.
This book is dedicated to our children, but we would like to acknowledge them here, too, for all they put up with and all they did to pull us through. Thanks to Kimber for spirited games of cricket that drove through the toughest writer’s block and for tossing wildly wonderful title ideas into the air. Thanks to Sophie for cheerfully keeping us company as we labored over the final draft by writing her own book, complete with illustrations. And thanks to Jacqueline for those joyful dance sessions, and for reminding everyone that it is always important to giggle. We hope that when all of you are grown up, this book will be a window into the hearts and minds of your moms, a journal about the journey that took us from the children we were to the mothers of children we adore.
We owe a big thanks to our agent, Elyse Cheney, who had the vision to imagine an actual book with chapters and a cover when presented with a one-page proposal. Your astute advice was invaluable as we churned through draft after draft until we finally had a finished manuscript.
We are indebted to our editor, Jennifer Pooley, and the entire team at William Morrow, who shared our conviction that one memoir could be written by two authors. Jen, your patience when life’s emergencies shelved our project for months was a godsend. Furthermore, your gentle guidance and endless enthusiasm liberated us to explore the contours and detours of our story.
Special thanks must go to our parents, Don and Dale Mauney and Rob and Anne James. We believe our quest to live full, adventurous lives is in part a reflection of your continuing passion to grow, learn, and evolve. Yet you also had the wisdom to know that in order for us to fly, we needed a safe place to land. It is impossible to thank you enough for this grounding and to say how very much we love you.
And that brings us to our wonderful troop of sisters. You are women to treasure, and we do. We also are inspired by you: by Marsha’s soulful writing and bold reinvention of her life; by Tish’s bravery and tenacity in spinning happiness out of hardship; by Dona’s sense of comfort and her boundless capacity to give, including the gift of her wonderful children, Maggie and Zan; by Elizabeth’s perseverance and faith, which helped her to recover her lovely voice and to blaze a new career path; by Susan’s deep well of optimism, restorative during days of emotional drought, and by her delight in all children, especially her darling Sebastian. Quite simply, we adore all of you. If we were not family, we would seek you out as friends, for you are both to us in equal measure.
While this is a book about our friendship, it is also a book about friends and friendship in general. We could not imagine our journey without all of you. While many of our dear friends are mentioned by name, others are not, but you know who you are. We love and thank you all.
We also would like to thank the men, women, and children who spoke to us, often at times of extreme duress, for their breathtaking eloquence and courage. And we thank, too, those creatures who shared their tales not with words, but by granting us acceptance. All of their stories have inspired us, taught us, and changed us.
Finally, any memoir is a record of events, which, by definition, is personal. In an attempt to be fair and accurate, we cross-checked our memories both with each other and with others in an attempt to clarify and amplify our individual impressions, as well as to ensure the integrity of this memoir overall. In the end, of course, this is our story. We have told it, to the best of our ability, and as we remember, and have worked hard to be accurate, honest, and true.