As soon as I got back to London, I recorded ‘High Heeled Shoes’ in a recording studio – which was an amazing experience, getting to work with all these really experienced musicians and producers. Then I just had to wait until the TV series of me going to Nashville aired in September, as the single was going to be released on the back of it. It was really weird knowing I was about to bring out my first single but not being allowed to do any press for it, or talk about it in any interviews, or even mention it anywhere on my social media. I was bursting to say something, but I just had to sit on my hands and keep quiet. To be honest, it did make me go a bit mental, but in a good way!
Finally, after what seemed like ages but was actually only a couple of months, the day the show was going to air came around, and I went on Loose Women to talk about it. Obviously, they’d booked me because I was a TOWIE face, and the panel did ask me loads of questions about Pete and stuff, but they also asked me all about my music. It did make me feel a bit shy talking about it for the first time, then the next thing I knew, they said, ‘Why don’t you just sing a bit?’
It was a bit weird, I was literally just sitting there on the panel, not exactly the usual set-up for a musical performance, but I just thought, ‘Well, this is my chance to show the nation.’ So I sang ‘Fields of Gold’ – no instruments or accompaniment or anything. I was shitting myself, but even while I was singing, I could see everyone’s face changing. That was a really cool moment, because they all seemed genuinely shocked. I don’t think any of them thought I had it in me to hold a note. They were all so nice, though, and it was a great thing to do ahead of the show going out later that night.
Literally as soon as the show began airing, I started getting some really nice comments on my Twitter and Instagram – people saying they liked my voice, asking where they could download my music, loads of good stuff. But still I couldn’t say anything because that was going to be the big reveal in the very last scene of the series. I just wanted to shout, ‘It’s coming!’
Finally, three days later, the credits came up for the last show, and then the single got released at midnight that same night. I put one tiny post on my Instagram about it, but that was it. No press, no promo, nothing you’d normally do for a single. I just had to wait and cross my fingers somebody somewhere might download it.
Well, pretty much straight away ‘High Heeled Shoes’ went into the country chart on iTunes, which I thought was pretty special, but then I saw that ‘Far Cry From Love’, my own song that I’d written with Beth back in Nashville, was in there as well. Something I’d actually written myself was in the charts. That was even better. I couldn’t believe my eyes.
I couldn’t think about going off to bed. I was way too excited. Instead, I was just sat in my PJs, watching the iTunes chart on my phone and swapping text messages with my manager Jade. She couldn’t sleep either. Then, at about two in the morning, she noticed both songs had gone into the main iTunes chart. AMAAZZING! We were both so busy looking at that, I forgot to look back at the country chart, and then suddenly there I was… at number one AND number two. I was literally screaming! I couldn’t believe my eyes. And one of the songs was one I’d actually written myself. What a special moment.
Finally, I dragged myself off to bed and somehow managed to fall asleep. I got back up the next morning, and couldn’t resist another quick peek at some point… okay, I’ll admit, it was the first thing I did. By now, I was in the top ten of the main chart with both tunes. Not a bad start to the day!
And then, just when I thought that was probably the peak, I went to number one AND two on the main iTunes chart. And knocked Taylor Swift off the top in the process. Sorry, Taylor!
I was still having trouble taking it all in. It didn’t feel real. I couldn’t believe my own eyes, and I mean, I REALLY couldn’t. I was looking at my phone, and I thought it must just be because I had those two tracks downloaded in my phone that I could see them. I thought, ‘This can’t be true,’ so I was ringing round my friends and family, asking them all to check their own iTunes. I remember shouting down the phone, ‘CHECK ITUNES!’ When they all said they could see it too, it really was OMG.
I can’t really explain what it felt like, but here’s what I wrote on Twitter that afternoon, and it pretty much covers it. I said, ‘OMG I AM OVERWHELMED! I am currently no. 1 & 2 on iTunes! Thank you guys so so much! I love you all for believing in me’. And I meant that, and still do.
Normally, radio stations won’t play tracks by reality TV stars, they’re like, ‘Errr… no,’ but because it was that high in the charts, they had to play it. So ‘High Heeled Shoes’ got played on all of them.
As for the reaction that day on social media, well… are you ready for this? Not one bad comment, not a single one, which I have to say was a first for me.
There were no actual plans to make a video, we hadn’t banked on the song doing that well, but because of the success in the charts we had to quickly put one together. So I met a bunch of directors, they pitched various treatments, and I picked the one that felt the most right. I knew I wanted a proper story to go with the song – got to do things the proper country way LOL.
Plus, I wanted to feel like I was really in Nashville, even though when we got to shooting it we were actually in… Kent. It was a bit more glamorous than it sounds: it was a full-on film set and loads of big Hollywood stars had worked there. From the look of it, you definitely would have thought we were in Nashville.
I had to get up really early to get there and, that morning, because there was quite a bit of press interest in me after the song went to number one, I had a pap follow me all the way from my house in Essex to the location in Kent, which was hours away. He followed us in his car, trying to get pictures. Then a few more turned up, so there were loads of paps buzzing around there in the end, and it all got a bit crazy and the people on the neighbouring properties called the police to try and get rid of the paps. Meanwhile, I was looking at the film set, and I could see all the cameras, one of them a camera dolly on a mounted track, probably worth a shit load of money. It was so serious and professional. I thought, ‘Fuck, this is real.’
But, at the same time, it was amazing. And the best bit was that I had to cast people to feature in it. It was surreal, me sitting there, flicking though all these pages of different models. The boys I chose to play the cowboys in my very own music video were Ollie, Charlie, Chibu and Pamara. It took a whole day and I was shattered by the end of it, but we managed to have a laugh too.
I loved the video. It was everything I wanted, going for that whole country and western vibe. I even got to walk through some wooden swinging saloon doors. I was buzzing, and it makes me smile to this day. The video still gets shown a lot on the music channels and I love seeing it. I always watch it and think, ‘WTF? Did that really happen?’
Things just kept building from there. The success of the song and the video led to me doing a mini tour. I started small – just planning two gigs up north, in Stoke and Derby, and then two more down south, in Southend and finishing at The Scala in Kings Cross.
When the tour dates were about to go out, I had all my usual worries – Is anyone going to come? Are there going to be loads of empty seats? What am I going to do with all the leftover tickets? How will I ever be able to show my face? I’d read about how when even a really massive artist can’t fill an arena, they hang a black curtain up halfway back in the hall so it looks full. I didn’t want to have to ask for the curtain for my very first gig in Stoke.
On the day the tickets went on sale, I tried to distract myself with a trip to Westfields. I’d put one post about the gigs on my social media. I didn’t do any other ads, and I was trying my best not to check my phone. Then, I was in Urban Outfitters, standing by the rail, when my mum called me. She said, ‘We can’t get tickets.’ I thought, ‘Oh shit, something’s gone wrong.’ I told her, ‘Refresh the page, maybe the link’s gone down.’ So she tried, but then she said, ‘I still can’t get any. It says Sold Out.’ I thought, ‘WTF? This can’t be real.’ So I phoned Jade to check the website was working properly, and it was. The first tickets had all gone in a few hours, and by the end of the day all four gigs were sold out. The venues even had to release their own production tickets due to the demand. No curtain needed LOL! Phew.
So I went straight into rehearsals and even flew Greg over from Nashville to play in my band, and then it was time to hit the road. The only downside to all this was, because the whole time had been so busy with travelling and rehearsing, plus I was still getting over my bronchitis from Nashville, my voice just gave out. Travelling up to Stoke for the first gig, no one knew but I was having a complete meltdown because I didn’t think I’d be able to sing. I got there, though, and got through the first gig in one piece. I gave it my all, but then, when I came off stage, I tried to speak and my voice had completely gone. I thought, ‘OMG, what’s going on?’
The next day it was even worse. I thought, ‘I’m fucked.’
Thank God for my tour manager, Johnny Buckland – love him, I want to give him a massive thank you. If it weren’t for him and his medical equipment, a pipe thing for steaming my throat, plus his special emergency medicine mixture, I definitely wouldn’t have got through those days. When I wasn’t performing I had to go on complete voice rest, and no one was allowed to talk to me, or rather, they were allowed to say what they liked, but I wasn’t allowed to answer. I know I must have looked like a right diva sitting there in silence, but trust me, it was the only way I was going to get through it.
But it was all worth it, though. To stand there and see the crowd all there for me, and then to have the whole audience singing back at me, well… I can’t explain what it feels like. But it’s amazing.
The majority of the songs were covers that I sang in my own style, plus ‘High Heeled Shoes’ and, guess what, a Miley Cyrus medley. Well, I couldn’t leave Miley out, could I?
By the time I got back to London for the final gig at The Scala, I really felt like I was living the dream. For that last one, the queues were going round the block. It felt insane, absolute madness, but it made me realise I was on the right path, that I would be able to do this, even after all that reality TV, because I’d been really worried it would never happen. Reality TV is always going to be something I’ll be happy to do, but music is my dream, and if it did have to come down to a choice between the two of them, it’s always going to be my music.
It might sound simple moving from that kind of TV show to making music, but it really isn’t. Lots of people might try but the problem is, they can’t actually sing. I can see why they might think it’s easy, starting off in the reality TV world, and instantly getting all that limelight. They probably just think, ‘This is easy. I’ll do a post here, a post there, do some TV, what’s next? Oh, I know, I’ll do a single.’
That might be fine for a gimmick, and I could have gone that way myself. I could much more easily have made a pop song and tried to get it played in the clubs, but that’s never been what I’ve wanted to do. Because I’ve been on TV, I’m lucky I already have a great following so that gives me a step up – and I’ve worked hard for those followers, just like singers have worked hard for years – but I want to earn my right to be seen as a proper artist. I want to do it the right way, even if it takes a lot more work.
They say the harder you work, the luckier you get. Well, cross my fingers that’s true. Before my Christmas gigs, I got signed up by my live booking agent Neil Warnock at United Talent Agency, which was unbelievable. Neil has artists like Dolly Parton and Mariah Carey on his books – he hadn’t signed anyone new in five years, but he agreed to take me on. So that meant there were bookings agents in the audience at Christmas, and that set the wheel in motion for summer 2018: supporting Ronan Keating at Rochester Castle, going on stage with a whole load of massive names at the Cornbury Festival – literally performing on the same bill as Alanis Morissette – and the best of all, supporting Michael Bublé at British Summertime in Hyde Park. I think I’m just going to say that again. Michael Bublé. Pinch me!
One of the best things that’s happened to me recently is meeting Amy Wadge. She co-wrote ‘Thinking Out Loud’ with Ed Sheeran, and loads of other amazing songs. I have a really cool bond with her; we just click. I have been to Wales a few times recently to write music with her, and we’ve come up with songs, recording them straight away in the studio.
Amy’s a perfectionist, but so am I; it’s probably why we get on so well. I’m very fussy, and I want to make sure the songs I’m singing relate to me. I want all my music to feel as personal as possible.
So that’s the plan going forward – gigging, writing, getting my stuff out on Spotify, putting out some acoustic tracks, building up my following, and proving to people that I’m serious about this. I know I’ve had some amazing chances to get this far, but the real work starts now.
My biggest pinch-me moments
The time I was a question on The Chase. They asked, ‘Megan McKenna became a regular in which reality TV series?’ This was always my granddad’s favourite show, and it made me think for that second, ‘Fuck, I’ve really made it.’
The moment I was standing behind the Eye to walk into Celebrity Big Brother. I’ve always been a massive fan of the show, and suddenly I was in it
Getting three Yeses on Britain’s Got Talent when I was only sixteen, from the judges Simon Cowell, Amanda Holden and Piers Morgan
Nine years later, Piers Morgan asking me for a pic for his Twitter when I was a guest on Good Morning Britain
Meeting Simon Cowell for the first time. And yes, he’s really nice. Nothing like as nasty as he used to come across on screen, although he smiles a lot more these days. Big softy, really!
Four thousand people in Wembley Arena chanting my name because they thought the judges made a mistake getting rid of me from the Six-Chair Challenge
Getting a blue tick on Instagram and Twitter
Getting a number one slot on the main iTunes chart. Knocking off Taylor Swift – sorry, Taylor!
Making my first music video – I’d dreamt of this literally since I was a little girl
Getting the keys to my first home
Standing in the middle of a rodeo in Tennessee, singing ‘The Star-Spangled Banner’ in front of a load of actual cowboys
Standing six rows from Justin Bieber at the O2. He was singing. I was only in the crowd but I could literally see his armpit hair
Cheryl Cole following me on Twitter
Getting Best Newcomer for my music at the Boisdale Awards
Supporting Michael Bublé at British Summertime Hyde Park
Looking at the hot tub in my very own back garden. Come on, sun!
The staff in McDonald’s in Liverpool letting me go behind the counter and serve people, and even letting me have a free Maccy D’s