HE WALKED OUT OF THE IN-N-OUT BURGER, WIPING his hands on his pants. He was still shaking, and his mind was a muddle. The kid he’d met in there had told him he was supposed to be onstage at the Hollywood Bowl at that moment. That didn’t make any sense. But then nothing seemed to make sense anymore. Not since the night of the light.
What he’d told the kid was the truth. All he remembered was a blinding white light, and then he’d woken up in the desert, alone. For a long time he’d just been wandering by himself, hungry.
Then a car had arrived to pick him up. Out of nowhere, as if it had known where to find him.
There was a guy in the car who looked familiar. The guy said his name was Sutton, and he was a friend. The guy took him back to a hotel; it was a nice one in Palm Springs. He remembered the name of the town because he’d been there as a kid.
They’d stayed there for a while, and then the guy took him to another hotel. The guy kept asking him if he thought he could play, but when he picked up a guitar, he looked at it and didn’t remember anything. Too bad, said the guy—Sutton—remember—his name was Sutton.
It was so hard to remember things now. Like his name. Sutton had said that if anyone asked, his name was Johnny. Johnny was a nice name, so he’d liked that.
That’s what the kid called him. Aren’t you Johnny Silver? The boy had asked. And for the first time, it resonated. Johnny Silver. He had been Johnny Silver. But he didn’t know who he was anymore. Not after the light.
Sutton had taken him to another nice hotel, high up in the hills, with a great view. It looked familiar. And the other day he was asleep in his bed and he heard a girl’s voice. It, too, had sounded familiar. It sounded like home.
The girl … he had to find the girl. She would know. She would know how to help him. She knew everything. She always did. That much he remembered.
So today, he decided he wanted to walk outside, and he found himself in front of the In-N-Out Burger.
He’d walked in and ordered the number one. That he remembered. He’d always gotten the number one before.
He took a deep breath. He was still confused and disoriented, and sad. He felt the tears falling freely on his cheeks. He had no idea why he was crying. Something about remembering that night had made him sad. But no matter. He liked being outside. Sutton kept him inside all the time. Wouldn’t let him do anything but order room service.
The light changed, and Johnny crossed the street. He didn’t know where he was going, didn’t know where he was from. But all he knew was he had to find her. He had to find the girl who had given him his name.