4

 

Reaching the fresh air of the main road, Adeline sank against the wall, her breath coming in gasps and tears flowing in a never ending stream down her face. Her hands moved over Ben, petting his head.

“Saving them from their deformities? Am I deformed as well, helping to defile a perfect world? I live a normal life. I dance and sing and play the piano and watch TV with the subtitles on. Dane does that so he can hear the TV over the noise of the children playing. I went to a main-stream school and was accepted by almost everyone. This is me. Adeline Monroe, a plump deaf person, who loves ice skating even if I do fall over more than stay upright. And a lot of people think I’m fine the way I am. And Rachel is fine the way she is, too. Different doesn’t mean wrong. She’s one of God’s children, just like me.”

Ben licked her hand, and she buried her face in his fur. “Yes, and you think I’m fine as well, you big softy,” she told him. He nudged her. Raising her head, she realized that Nate stood beside her. “How much did you hear?”

“I heard enough to know why he’s giving you a hug.” Nate perched on the wall next to her and handed her a tissue.

“Thanks.” Adeline wiped her face and blew her nose.

“This world is far from perfect, you know that. If it was perfect, then Jesus wouldn’t have needed to have been born and died for us.”

“I know, but maybe this creep has a point. Rachel’s whole life has been a struggle to be accepted, just like mine. And now, when she and I have made it and most people do accept us for what we are, this happens and everything gets turned on its head.”

Nate touched her hand. “You are a beautiful woman with a lot to give. Don’t ever let anyone tell you any different. And Rachel is, too.”

“But our hearing loss…”

“It makes no difference to me or Dane or Jasmine or anyone who really cares about you or Rachel.”

“Cares about me?” Did he just include himself in that sentence or am I reading too much into this?

“Yes, cares. You have friends and family who do care, a lot. Don’t ever believe that you don’t. More importantly God cares about you. Remember first Peter chapter five verse seven. Cast all your cares upon Him, for He careth for you.”

“That’s one of my favorite verses.”

“Mine, too.” He held her gaze. “Right. Dane’s going to finish up here. He and a composite artist are going to get a computer generated description from Rachel and then go home. He’s using a text document to talk to her. How about you and I go back to my place and make those messy worms for Vianne?”

A reluctant smile covered her lips. He was still prepared to cook for her, after everything that had happened. “You invite me to dinner and then expect me to help cook it?”

His shoulders shook, and his face lit as he laughed. “Yes, because I’m mean like that and have no idea how to charm and date women properly.”

Adeline laughed. Tension left her shoulders. It was nice to know there was still humor in the world, especially at a time like this. “Then it’s a good job this isn’t a date.”

“It certainly is. And yes, I meant what I said about being friends. Come on. I even have something Ben can eat.”

Ben’s ears pricked up and Adeline smiled. “Thank you. But don’t you and Dane want to discuss the case, follow leads and so on?”

“There’s nothing more I can do tonight, but it will be full on in the morning. Maybe we could talk after dinner, once Vianne is in bed. I’d like to know a little more about you. But if you’d rather help me figure things out, then that would be good, as well.”

“Sure, we can do both.”

Nate stood and offered a hand.

Burning heat shot through her hand as he hauled her upright.

“Then let’s go. Messy worms await.”

 

****

 

Adeline sat on the bar stool in the kitchen.

Nate sure knew his way around the stove, and the meat sauce smelled heavenly.

Thank you for bringing him into my life the way You did. Even if all we ever are is friends, then my life is blessed for that.

Nate glanced at her. “What are you thinking? You have this enigmatic smile on your face.”

“Just thinking how domesticated you look in your apron. The human side of the police force.”

Nate smiled. “I try. Honestly, I never cooked much before Vianne. But you can only give a child so much junk food and frozen TV dinners. She bought me the apron a couple of Christmas’s ago when I managed to spill tomato puree down a white shirt and couldn’t get the stains out.”

A small hand tapped her foot and Adeline glanced down.

“Junk food is bad for you,” Vianne said, fondling Ben’s ears absently. “Too many chips make you fat. And give you heart disease”

“Do they?”

Vianne nodded. “So do burgers. We’re learning about it at school. I like what Uncle Nate makes. He calls them proper dinners.” She tilted her head. “Do you like toad in the hole?”

Adeline nodded. “I make that a lot. It’s my favorite. I like cauliflower cheese, too. And roast beef.”

“I love that. We don’t have it often enough. Uncle Nate works too much to do a roast. He says they take too long to make and I’d be in bed by the time it was ready.”

“Then how about on Sunday you and Uncle Nate come to my house after church for lunch. We’ll have roast beef, then.”

Vianne turned to Nate. The angle of her head precluded Adeline from reading her lips, but Nate’s response was all too clear.

“She’s a witness. I can’t…” He broke off as Vianne gesticulated wildly. “I know, but this is—”

Adeline looked away not wanting to see his excuses. So much for the two of them being friends. She had finally met a bloke who treated her like a ‘normal’ person and now this. It wasn’t fair. She looked back at him. “I can go if you’d rather not be seen consorting with a witness.”

Nate shook his head. “This is different.”

She frowned, really not seeing how, but not going to ask. She felt uncomfortable enough now as it was. “It’s no different at all. But, if you don’t want to come or you can’t because of work, I don’t have a problem with that. But perhaps Vianne could come to my place for dinner after school one night. I’ll feed her, and you can pick her up when you finish your shift.”

Vianne shot her a beaming smile. “That would be wonderful. Please, Uncle Nate?”

“All right.” He scrutinized Adeline, and she shivered under the intensity of his gaze. Her heart pounded, threatening to jump into her throat and suffocate her. How could he be so nice one minute and then cold the next? Was he so used to playing good cop-bad cop that he did it off duty, as well?

“Cool.” Vianne’s smile lit her entire face.

Nate turned his gaze to his niece. “Now go wash your hands while I dish up.”

“Yes, Uncle Nate.” She scrambled to her feet and ran from the room.

“Nate…” Adeline spoke hesitantly. “If you’d rather she didn’t come to dinner until this case is over, I don’t mind. I don’t want to do anything to jeopardize things at work for you.”

“It’s fine. How about Wednesday? I don’t finish until seven, then.”

She nodded. “Wednesday’s good.”

A smile finally crossed Nate’s face, although it never reached his eyes. “Thank you.”

“Welcome.”

Nate brought the plates over just as Vianne ran back into the room. She had yet another hat pulled down over her hair. What was with the child and hats?

Just as Nate sat down, he rolled his eyes and pulled his phone from his pocket. “I have to take this. Please, start eating, I won’t be long. Vianne, say grace.” He pushed his chair back and left the table. “Holmes.”

Adeline nodded, her eyes following him from the room. Worry had settled on his face and he didn’t say more than his name before he left the room. Adeline wondered. Was it Rachel? Had something more happened to her? Or worse, had the Herbalist struck again?

Vianne touched her hand. “I’ll say grace.” She closed her eyes. “Thank You, God, for this nice dinner. Amen.”

“Amen.” Adeline picked up her fork.

Vianne stabbed her spaghetti with a fork. “This happens a lot. He works way too much.”

“He’s got a very important job.”

“I can think of a more important one.”

Adeline took a mouthful. The food was as delicious as it both looked and smelled. “What’s that?”

“He needs a wife. He shouldn’t be alone the way he is.”

Adeline choked on her spaghetti. She reached for the glass of water. “Really?”

“God doesn’t want him to be alone. It says so in the Bible. And if I had an auntie, then I wouldn’t be palmed off on babysitters so much. Assuming she was a stay-at-home auntie and not a works-all-the-hours-God-gives-her auntie.”

Adeline took several swallows of the water, wondering how to respond.

She knew marriage was the preferred state, and God designed men and women for that. However, it was also true that He called some people to remain single, that they might serve Him better that way. It was hard. She knew all too well how hard it was to be alone. She prayed daily for the one special person she hoped was waiting for her. But she also knew that God constantly gave her the strength to face every day alone.

Looking at Vianne, Adeline smiled. “Uncle Nate told you that, did he?”

“No. Uncle Dane told him one night when I was playing in the hall. I have a list of candidates. Would you like to see it?”

“Maybe when you come to dinner on Wednesday. I don’t think you want Uncle Nate overhearing your list.”

Vianne’s choice of language was impressive, if a little adult at times. She obviously spent way too much time with adults rather than children her own age.

“Did you want to apply? I can add your name after dinner.”

“Me?” Adeline choked again, this time sparking a proper coughing fit. Her eyes watered and she was dimly aware of someone thumping her back. Finally, the lump shifted and she could breathe.

Nate stood there, holding out fresh water.

She took it and swallowed several large mouthfuls. “Sorry.”

“Are you all right?”

She nodded. “It just went down the wrong way.”

“Vianne said it had bones in it.”

“No. It’s really nice.”

Nate sat down. “So long as you’re all right.”

“I’m fine.” Adeline glanced at Vianne, who put a finger to her lips. She nodded and picked up her fork again.

 

****

 

After dinner, with Vianne taking her time in the bath, Nate smiled across at Adeline. He’d been wrong earlier in the way he’d spoken to her. But she’d accepted his apology, which was good. And despite choking on the food, she appeared to have enjoyed it and so far escaped without any repercussions.

“You realize I’ve never cooked for a woman before,” he told her.

“Really? Doesn’t Vianne count?” She sipped her coffee, the other hand petting Ben.

“You know what I mean. Since Pete died, I haven’t had time to do anything other than be a surrogate father. I always saw myself as married with kids by now. Guess I have the kids, well kid, but it’s not the same.”

“Do you wish things were different?”

“Sometimes. It’d be nice to come home to another adult to talk to, to have dinner ready occasionally.”

“Just occasionally?”

“Well, maybe seven nights a week…” He wasn’t sure his teasing tone carried over in lip reading so he winked at her to prove his point.

Adeline laughed. “Would she have to have your pipe filled and your slippers by the fire?”

“Naturally, though I’d have to start smoking first.” He sipped his coffee. “The house would be spotless, and she’d change from her work dress and apron into an evening gown, and wait on me hand and foot.”

“You know she doesn’t exist except in your mind, right?”

Nate snorted. “Yeah, but a man can dream, can’t he?”

“As long as he knows the difference between the dream and reality.” Adeline grinned.

“I do.”

“Just as well, because the perfect woman isn’t me and I’m pretty sure I’m never likely to be.”

Nate eyed her. “That’s fine with me. Perfection is over rated. I like women who know their own mind and work at jobs they love, whether it’s at home or somewhere else. I like women who enjoy life, good food, and aren’t so into their looks it becomes an obsession. Like you. You look nice.”

Color flooded her cheeks. “You’re just saying that.”

“No, I mean it.” He smiled at her. “You look great in whatever you wear. Not everyone can do that, but you can. There is nothing wrong with the way you look. Or dress. Or do your hair. Don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise. And that includes yourself.”

“Thank you.”

“Welcome.” He grimaced at the sound of splashing from above. “I’m convinced she’ll bring the ceiling down one day when she splashes so much. It sounds like she’s bath skating again.”

“Bath skating?” Confusion clouded Adeline’s face.

He smiled. “It’s where you sit on the top of the angled part of the bath at the back and slide down into it. Water goes everywhere.” He demonstrated with his hands, parodying the kid’s song from Sunday School. “Kind of Vianne came down and the floods went whoosh.”

Adeline’s laugh echoed like silver bells. “Does she wear a hat in the bath, too?”

“And in bed. She is never without one. She’ll wash and dry her hair and put the hat back on before coming downstairs.”

“What about school?”

“A hat is part of the uniform, so they tolerate it in class.”

Adeline put the cup down and held his gaze. “If you don’t mind me asking, what is it about the hats?”

Nate studied his hands for a long moment, wondering how to explain something he didn’t fully understand himself. “Most kids, from what I’ve been told, have a security blanket. Usually it’s a teddy, a comforter, blanket, dummy or something similar, which they take everywhere at first. To start with, Vianne didn’t have anything like that. No special toy or anything. Pete joked she was the only child in the history of the world who didn’t need one special thing to help her sleep.”

“I had a bear. It had fifteen names.”

“I had a rabbit, but don’t tell anyone that.” The memories of those first few difficult months with Vianne were painful even after all these years. “After Pete and Ophelié died, Vianne became very withdrawn and clingy for several weeks. She wouldn’t leave my side, not even for Sunday School, with me in the main church building. She would doze on the sofa until I went to bed, and then insisted on sleeping on the floor next to my bed, or I’d have to camp out in the room she’d chosen for herself. So, one Sunday, I wore my baseball cap to church and when we got there, I gave it to her to wear. Told her that way she knew I’d come and collect her after Sunday School because she had my hat.”

“I guess it worked.”

Nate grinned. “I didn’t get the hat back. In fact, she wore it everywhere. It took six months, and a lot of hard work, before I could buy her a hat of her own. I assume she feels safe when she wears one. Equates it with knowing someone is always coming to get her.”

“It’s good she has that. And you. You do a wonderful job of caring for her.”

“I try. It’s my intention that I’ll always be there for her.” He put his coffee down and held out his arms as Vianne came running into the room. “There you are, pumpkin. You all ready for bed, now?”

She ran into his arms and hugged him tightly. “Yes, and I’ve cleaned my teeth. I’m ready for my story and prayers now.”

“Good girl.” He got to his feet. “I’ll be back in a few, once I’ve put Vianne to bed.”

“I’ll be here.” Adeline smiled.

 

****

 

Vianne went to bed easier than Nate anticipated, but he wasn’t going to complain.

Having gone up expecting a fight, he was pleasantly surprised not to get one. That was a relief. He needed to tell Adeline about the phone call and what Dane had found out. He went back downstairs, to find Adeline flicking through the photo album from the table.

Ben tapped her on the arm and she looked up and smiled. “These pictures are good. Did you take them?”

Nate nodded, sitting next to her. “I did and thank you.”

“You should sell some of them. This one is wonderful.” She pointed to a sunset over the lake. Two swans sat in the foreground, their beaks touching, an orange glow surrounding them and the water rippling beside their bodies.

He cringed with embarrassment. “I just happened to be there. Anyone could have taken it.”

“Not everyone would have captured the essence of the moment. You have a talent.”

Heat rose in his cheeks. No one had praised his work in a long time. “Thank you.”

Adeline flicked a few more pages. “Wow, look at all those bluebells. Where’s this?”

“Christmas Common. Vianne loves the bluebells, we go every year. I have an album just with her and the flowers.” He took a deep breath, not wanting to spoil the moment, but needing to broach the subject of the phone call.

Putting a hand on the book, he closed it gently. “Adeline, I need to talk to you.”

“You look serious. What’s up?”

“The phone call during dinner was Dane. We’ve got, well not a lead exactly, but a connection between all the victims.”

“Should you be telling me this? After all I’m one of your witnesses, remember.”

“I know you’re officially a witness, and I discussed the point with Dane. Fact is, we both agree you need to know. So you can take precautions.”

Adeline caught her breath. “What kind of precautions? Are you saying the Herbalist knows who I am?”

“Nothing like that. I just want you to be extra vigilant, that’s all.” He took a deep breath, looking at her intently. He made sure he spoke carefully, not wanting her to misinterpret any of his words. “We just had it confirmed that the Herbalist is only targeting disabled people. Deaf, lame, short-sighted and so on. In fact anything that deviates from the norm.”

He could almost see the bristles rising as Adeline straightened. Ben leapt off her lap and stood guard next to her. He wasn’t sure if he imagined the bared teeth or whether Ben actually did it momentarily.

Indignation colored her voice, and fire shot from her eyes. “Are you saying I’m disabled?”

Nate backtracked, annoyed with himself, trying to think of a better word. “No, I’m not saying that at all.”

“Then what are you saying, Sergeant?” Her use of his title indicated he’d crossed a line.

“You know what I mean.”

Anger creased her face, spilling over into her hand gestures and voice. “No, I don’t. I’m not disabled or disadvantaged. I’m deaf. You said earlier it didn’t matter, or was that a lie? Something you tell all your witnesses just to keep them happy? Something to calm them down, stop them crying.”

“Disabled was the wrong word, I accept that.”

“Would you prefer deformed or crippled or maimed?”

Nate turned away.

Her anger was blistering, but fully justified.

Lord, help me find a way to calm her, explain properly.

“Don’t you do that. You know I can’t hear you if you turn your face away.” Adeline moved and stood in front of him. Her eyes glittered, and she rapidly signed at him, not saying a word. He knew from the vehemence of her movements that she was angry, no, way more than angry, she was furious with him.

Nate didn’t understand any of what she was trying to tell him. She may as well have been speaking Portuguese or Russian for all the difference it made. Frustrated at the communication gap, he reached out and grabbed her hands. As he did so, something almost electrical passed between them. He looked at her, holding her gaze, and moved closer to her. Before he realized what he was doing, he leaned in, and his lips brushed against hers.

Her mouth was soft under his and her body molded against him as if they were made for each other. He looked at her, but she had her eyes closed.

He slid a hand into her hair, and placed the other on small of her back, holding her close as he kissed her.

 

****

 

Adeline parted her lips slightly, giving him control as he deepened the kiss. Her arms slid around Nate’s neck and she leaned against his firm body. Her eyes closed, leaving her fully immersed in his touch and taste. She could taste the coffee and a hint of the herbs from dinner. Ripples of pleasure ran through her, radiating outwards until all that mattered was Nate and the feelings he sent spiraling through her.

The simple touch warmed her completely, lighting a fire within she wasn’t sure would ever go out. All she knew was that she didn’t want it to. She kissed him back, eager to take what he offered, to give back as much as she took.

The kiss went on forever, until just as she thought she’d never breathe again, he pulled away. Adeline opened her eyes. His hands slid to her shoulders, her skin burning under his touch. Adeline held his gaze, still able to feel him on her lips. “Do you kiss everyone you argue with?”

“Not usually.” He held her gaze as he ran a finger slowly over her swollen lips. “You didn’t seem to object.”

“I’ve never been kissed before.”

“Seriously? I’d never have known.”

She held his gaze, not daring to hope he meant anything by the kiss “Never…being ‘disabled’ tends to scare men off.”

“I’m sorry I said that. It was unforgivable. I feel horrible.”

“So you should. But I’ll forgive you if you promise not to do it again.”

“I promise.” Nate hugged her, and she leaned against him, marveling at the warmth a simple hug could give. She could stay in his arms forever, if only it were possible.

After a long moment she pulled back to smile at him.

Nate smiled back. “You’re amazing.”

“I don’t think so. I’ve never been called that before. I’ve been called lots of other things, but not that.”

His fingers caressed her face. “Well, I think so.”

Adeline closed her eyes and leaned into his touch, one hand pressed against the firmness of his chest, the other resting on his throat. She could feel his heart beating under her fingers, the rise and fall of his breathing. Standing there she felt safe and…she hesitated to say loved. She knew she cared for him. Cared very much what happened to him and about him, but was it love or was it just the emotions of the moment making her head spin.

Vibration under her fingers made her open her eyes. She focused on his lips just as they finished moving.

“…care.”

“I didn’t catch that, I’m sorry.”

“No problem. I said, you need to take care out there.”

“Why? And don’t give me any more of that disabled rubbish. Ben takes wonderful care of me, and I’ve been doing this since I was five.”

“I don’t want anything happening to my niece’s favorite dolly doctor.”

A sinking feeling settled in her stomach. She was reading too much into this after all. She looked down. “I see.”

Gentle fingers lifted her face. A smile teased the corner of his lips, lighting his eyes. They shone with an inner beauty she hadn’t noticed before. “But more because I care about what happens to you.”

“I care about you, too.”

He smiled properly. “I’m glad.”

She glanced at the clock above the mantelpiece. “It’s getting late. I should go.”

“Let me call you a cab.”

“No, I can walk. Ben needs a walk before bed, anyway.”

“Then I insist you call me as soon as you get home. I won’t sleep tonight unless I know you’re safe.”

“I will. I promise.”

“Good. Stay here and I’ll get your coat.”

Adeline slid into her coat. “Thank you for dinner. Are you sure you won’t join us on Wednesday? Or am I still just a witness?”

“You’re more than just a witness,” Nate said. “But I still won’t finish before seven.”

“That’s fine. Vianne can have a snack after school, and we’ll eat with you.”

“I’d like that very much.”

“Then it’s a date.” Adeline paused, as the realization of what she said sunk in.

“Just dinner is fine. And don’t forget to call when you get in.” He made no reference to her slip.

“I won’t.” She headed down the road; her heart in her boots by Ben’s trotting paws. She was a fool.