ORIGIN

Imported from North America to Ireland in the sixteenth century, refined by cat breeders in the Emerald Isle, and then sent back to North America, this nondescript feline certainly wins no awards for its looks. Or athleticism. Or intelligence. However, it’s definitely low maintenance, requiring nothing from its owner beyond a cool, quiet corner in the root cellar.

BEHAVIOR

All but incapable of independent movement, it spends its days staring vacantly into space and shedding relentlessly.

FUN FACT

Develops extra eyes as it ages.

WHERE TO FIND THEM

Idaho.

WHERE NOT TO FIND THEM

In heavily compressed soils with poor drainage and little organic matter.