‘You are going to be transformed!’ Tish said as she brandished a little purple number on a hanger. ‘Farewell, Liliana Donadi. Hello, Lady Stardust!’
It was the day of the Regatta. My flight was at six the next morning, and Carter and Richie were determined to pull an all-nighter. I perched on my suitcase and looked at my newly contoured cheeks in her mirror. I had to admit she was good at make-up – though I was less sure about her clothing choices. The dress she’d given me was so low-cut it made my chest look concave.
‘That is quite possibly the least sexy thing I have ever seen,’ I said, studying my reflection. ‘I look like a giant bruise.’
‘You have looked better.’ She gave me a cropped T-shirt and bandage skirt that collectively revealed more skin than I would have usually shown at the beach. I tugged them on, trying to stretch out the skirt so it covered my thighs.
‘The skirt’s good,’ she said, appraising me in the mirror. ‘Not sure about the top. Your midriff is hot, though – you should show it off. And we need something with a plunging neckline.’
‘What for? I don’t have any boobs.’
‘Don’t be stupid,’ she said, handing me a silk camisole. ‘You have nice perky boobs.’
‘Legs, tummy and cleavage?’ I said as I pulled it over my head. ‘That’s a bit extreme, don’t you think?’
‘You want Carter to notice you, don’t you?’ she said, pouring vodka into two shot glasses. ‘Tonight is your last chance.’
‘He’s just my friend,’ I protested, but my reflection looked like someone had slapped it, even under all the make-up.
‘You’re only human,’ she said kindly. ‘Carter is fine. And, well … Sam told me about the song.’
‘We’re just friends,’ I repeated, thinking about his casual arm around my shoulders at Perfect Storm. ‘And even if I did like him, I’m leaving first thing tomorrow. We’ve kind of missed that boat.’
‘That just means you’ve got nothing to lose,’ she said. ‘It’s your last night in England; can you really live with not knowing?’ She handed me one of the shots. ‘Down the hatch. A couple of these and you’ll be confident enough to snog the guitarist.’
I gave it back to her. ‘No thanks. I’ve got a six am flight, remember? I need my wits about me.’
Sam tooted the horn and Tish raced outside, running expertly in heels. I dragged my suitcase behind her, my borrowed shoes threatening to pitch me face-first down her stairs. When I reached the car, Sam broke into a grin.
‘Wow, Donadi,’ he said. I crossed my arms over my bare stomach as he hauled my suitcase into the boot. ‘You really scrub up OK.’
‘Doesn’t she look great?’ Tish said. ‘The clothes are mine.’
‘No-one’s going to notice the clothes,’ he said.
Tish whooped. ‘What did I tell you? That boy is yours –’ she caught my warning glance and stopped mid-sentence.
Sam raised an eyebrow. ‘After someone in particular?’
I wished I could slide gracefully through a trapdoor. I tossed in a tote bag full of clothes I’d kept out for the plane and slammed the boot closed. ‘Let’s get going.’
On the way to the Regatta, I asked Sam if they’d thought more about auditioning another singer. He glanced at me in the rearview mirror. ‘It’s going to be hard to replace you.’
It hadn’t really felt like I was leaving until that moment. His words made it suddenly seem real. ‘You’ll find someone.’
‘Yeah,’ he said, ‘But she won’t be Lady Stardust.’
I hid my face from Tish so she didn’t tell me off for smudging all her hard work.
It was past nine. In Australia, my friends and family would be waking up to a sunny winter morning and getting ready for my return. Dad would be driving Nonna to church and Jack would be nursing his hangover and checking the surf. Phoenix would be scrambling to finish assignments for Monday and Ellie would be heading to the skate park. Life had gone on as usual for them, but for me, everything had changed.
I didn’t know how I was meant to go back to writing my own songs, picking out a melody without the safety net of the band. I didn’t know how I was going to sleep in the bedroom I’d had since I was eight, without the sound of eleven other girls snoring every night.
I didn’t know how I was going to leave Carter and Sam.
•
The smell of German sausages and fairy floss hung over the main street of Henley, which was lined with market stalls and blocked to traffic. In the town square, a stage had been set up with a view right down to the river. Richie was holding a corner of the banner that had bought our freedom to perform while Carter tied one edge to a pole. A girl in a tight dress perched on the lip of the stage, scrolling through her phone. For the first time, I was glad I was wearing Tish’s clothes.
Carter jumped down from his stepladder, and his gaze snagged on the sliver of skin at my waist. ‘Where you been hiding that body then, Jim?’
I blushed under all the make-up. ‘Somewhere you’d never find it.’
‘Oh, you wound me.’ He hit his chest with a mock arrow, then turned back to the banner. I wiped the lipstick off on my wrist. If I’d wanted a bigger reaction from him, I’d clearly never met the guy.
We were the first band on tonight, opening for the big acts. Nerves rose in my throat and I clamped them down, determined to enjoy our first and last real gig. I cranked out ‘Blister in the Sun’ again and the crowd laughed. From the corner of my eye, I saw Sam watching as if I was the conductor of our tiny orchestra. I wished Dad and Jack and Phoenix were here to see it. I wished Ellie could hear the words that had poured out of me when I finally knew I had lost her.
We moved seamlessly through the set list, letting each song stand on its own but building to the end. We had rehearsed our songs into oblivion and now muscle memory kicked in. All we had to do was ride the music until it set us gently down. I knew Carter, Sam and Richie would just find someone else to front the band, that they would write new songs with their new singer, but I was determined that they wouldn’t forget me. If I couldn’t be part of Lady Stardust forever, at least I could be the kind of founding member who left their mark.
The final song, of course, was ‘King Cutie’ and the audience went wild. As the feedback reverberated into silence, I was too emotional to say anything, so I grinned insanely at the crowd until Carter took the mic from me and thanked everyone for watching. When we finally leapt down from the stage, the sweat was drying cold on my skin.
Sam started dismantling the drum kit and Richie disappeared for a cigarette. Carter had his arm around the girl in the skintight dress and was heading towards the German sausage van. I leaned against the stage and breathed in the evening air.
A narrow-shouldered guy with thick-framed glasses approached me, hand outstretched. ‘Hi, I’m Jerry.’
Maybe one of the unfortunate side effects of playing a great gig was having to be polite to the randoms who’d enjoyed it. ‘Liliana,’ I said cautiously. ‘What can I do for you?’
‘I think it might be more what I can do for you,’ he said.
Ugh, what a line. He was a lot older than me. Sam was taking his equipment to his car, too far away for me to call for help, and Carter and his pull were lost in the crowd by now.
‘Liliana, is it?’ Jerry’s teeth were sharp. ‘I am in A&R at Beatnik Records.’
I let out a laugh. He was bold. Did he really think I’d fall for that?
He wordlessly extracted a business card from his pocket and tapped it twice on the edge of the stage before handing it over. The card had the Beatnik logo and this guy’s name: Jerry Love, Artist & Repertoire. Heat swept over my face. Beatnik wasn’t just a record company: they had the contract with Quest for the Best. They were the ones responsible for assembling Perfect Storm. This guy had probably met Addie Marmoset.
‘Someone sent me a link to your video channel and I thought I’d come along tonight and check you out.’ I sent a silent thank you to Tish, who had vanished in the direction of the fairy floss stall the minute our gig was over. ‘Let me say, that song – “King Cutie”? Brilliant. I’d like to introduce you to some of my colleagues. It’s not a guarantee of anything, but we’ll get you in front of the right people.’ He took a pen from the inside pocket of his blazer, plucked the business card from my fingers and wrote an address on the back. ‘How does midday tomorrow suit you?’
My grin faded. ‘I can’t …’ I spluttered.
‘Liliana,’ he said, grasping my hand. ‘I think you’ll find you can.’ He looked at me over his glasses, and the bottom fell out of the world as he wove back through the crowd.
I turned the card over a few times. At midday tomorrow I would be hurtling through the air, barely six hours into my trip home, after hugging Sam and Tish goodbye at the airport. I would be flying away from the biggest opportunity of my life while the boys sat down at Beatnik ‘in front of the right people’.
I did a circuit of the street and found Carter and the girl near the sausage stall. I held up Jerry’s business card and tried to assemble my face into the delight I knew Carter would feel. Maybe when I saw his reaction, it would be real.
‘You got any plans tomorrow?’ I said.
Carter grabbed the card from me as I told him what had just happened.
‘You’ve got to be joking!’ he exclaimed. ‘I missed that?’ He took hold of my waist and whirled me round, and my heart lurched with the breakneck turn the night had taken. ‘I knew this day would come! I knew we could do it! And in the nick of time, too. Just think, Jim, if it had been one day later, you would’ve been back in Australia already.’
‘I can’t go,’ I said. ‘I have to get my flight.’
His mouth tightened and he abruptly let me go. ‘Jimi. It’s Beatnik Records.’
‘You and Sam and Richie should go.’
‘Of course you’re going. Just delay your flight by a week. You can stay with Tish.’
‘I can’t delay it. It’s a non-refundable ticket and Dad’s expecting me.’
He frowned for a moment and then brightened. ‘Well, let’s see if we can change your mind. This calls for a celebration, in any case. Find Richie and Sam. I’ll meet you in the Angel.’
•
Carter arranged a handful of glasses on the table and opened a bottle of whisky. From the schoolhouse, I’d often looked across the river at the pub beside the bridge, and now we were inside – Carter was right, no-one was checking ID. At first, knowing we could still be thrown out at any minute put me on edge, but the harried bar staff didn’t give us a second glance and after a few minutes I relaxed.
‘Do you think Jerry Love is his real name?’ Carter necked his drink and poured a second. The girl in the bandage dress – Stevie, Carter had said her name was – had followed us here and was now perched beside him, watching us closely.
‘It doesn’t matter. And you’d better not ask him tomorrow or you’ll ruin it for everyone,’ I said, ignoring the whisky he’d placed in front of me.
‘It’s no use anyway,’ Richie said. ‘If Liliana’s not coming, they’re not going to want us.’ I wondered if Richie realised this was the first time he’d ever admitted that I was any good, even in a backhanded way. ‘Why are you all pretending we’re in with a shot? He wanted the band, and we’re not the band without Liliana.’
‘You’ll just have to rebrand yourself as a three-piece until you find another singer,’ I said. ‘And you’d better thank me in your Supernova speech when you’re famous.’
‘Anyway, Jerry Love might not even be the guy to impress,’ said Sam. ‘A&R puts artists forward, but I’m pretty sure it’s management that hands out record deals.’
‘Don’t you want that?’ Carter said to me, motioning towards my glass, and I shook my head. He held it aloft. ‘A toast. To Liliana.’ All his usual bravado was gone and he looked like he was enjoying my astonishment. ‘Our lives changed when you arrived in England and we wouldn’t be here without you. Even though you’re leaving us, you’ll always be part of Lady Stardust.’