It had been a disturbed, and disturbing, night but Professor Stavros Kyriakos assumed his mantle of educational responsibility as soon as he stepped inside the university building where his classroom and office were housed.
There were a number of papers awaiting his attention in the IN box and several items that needed to be taken to the secretary for inter-college mail. He brushed these aside, regretting the changes that had deprived him of a department secretary who used to take care of these details for him.
While the students were assembling in their classes for the morning lectures, he had a few minutes when he could count on being undisturbed. In these minutes he accessed a private folder on his computer. This folder was transported in his inner jacket pocket via a memory stick that never left his possession. It was labelled simply, ‘Pauline’.
Inside the folder were a series of emails dating from two years previously. He read these from the beginning as he often did, in an attempt to understand how he had ended up in this dangerous relationship.
It had started very innocently. Pauline was a star student, easily identified as soon as she entered the graduate program. Her undergraduate degree was in classical art history and she demonstrated her interpretive skills on one of the first field trip digs she had ever experienced.
The small, select group of students had permission to excavate a field adjacent to the privately-owned Bignor Roman Villa site in a remote location deep in the West Sussex hills along single-track lanes and far from the usual tourist routes. It lay close to the old Roman Road, Stane Street, remnants of which could be seen on the high ridge above the excavated remains of the Roman Villa.
This site was a favourite of Stavros’ because it was the only Roman site he knew where visitors could actually walk on pathways where tesserae remained in their original positions. Nothing else could give students that thrill of being so close to the legions who lived in Britain for over three centuries.
Pauline grasped immediately, the necessity to work with excruciating care in order to plot the position of each tiny piece of stone, or other matter, the earth could reveal. It was, however, her vision of the overall plan of the partly-excavated site itself, which was extraordinary for a beginning student.
She made a link, instinctively, between the tiny pieces of tesserae she uncovered in the field and concluded these remnants must be a sign of the continuance of the mosaic pathway in the interior of the house. Her hunch was correct. Subsequent investigations revealed the pavement was one of the longest ever discovered in Britain’s many Roman ruins.
The other students were as astonished as was Stavros himself. The men crowded around Pauline in the hopes that they could inhale some of her skill from just a small contact with her breath. But she was not interested in their advances. Her eyes were for the professor only, and his approval was the only one she sought from that time onwards.
He admitted she was easy to like. It was not just her stunning good looks and vibrant youth. He was immune to these usually. It was her willingness to learn and grow that caught his attention.
Many students enrolled in the archaeology masters program in an attempt to postpone their entry to adult life and responsibilities. Others thought of the program as a ‘bird course’, a sinecure that permitted them to do field work and breathe the fresh outdoor air instead of the stale air of academia.
Pauline was never destined to fall into either of these categories.
Stavros recognized his tendency to favour her with special smiles and shared jokes, based on their common knowledge of Latin and Greek languages. He also recognized the danger in this favouritism and worked all the harder to include the rest of the group, but there was always that special feeling between him and Pauline from the start.
Now she was enrolled in the summer session in Greece. He could not avoid her there. They would be in close contact all through the month of July and he knew from previous experience just how powerful the influence of sun and classic sculpture could be, when away from the confines of the university and the uncertainty of English summer weather.
He dared not challenge her admission to the course. All the plans were made and the accommodations had been paid for. The latest email underscored her desire to meet up with him again and, although he had been circumspect in his online correspondence with her, he feared there might be mobile phone messages which could be misinterpreted by someone who had mischief in mind.
Not that he had singled Pauline out for special advice. It was commonplace to talk frequently with his students whenever projects or papers were to be submitted. Yet, he knew his voice mail must reveal his affection for the dedicated young woman. He so wanted to encourage her in her studies. It had crossed his mind more than once that she would make a perfect candidate to succeed him in a few years and with that objective he had actively encouraged her to reach her highest potential.
This thought reminded him that the final draft of Pauline’s graduate thesis presentation should be in his secure email site by now. A few clicks brought him to the site and he scanned the list. Good! The work was there. The quality was not in question as he had been involved in her presentation preparation from the outset. Nevertheless, he thought it advisable to scan quickly through the pages to confirm that all was in order. Occasionally a student forgot to include the summary or all the required references.
He was about to resume his folder reading when an appendix, addressed to him personally, popped up at the end of Pauline’s work.
A chill brought gooseflesh to his arms as he realized there could be something incriminating in the short note. He read it at speed, anxious to delete the message as soon as possible but stopped in horror when he saw the contents.
....... The test confirmed that I am definitely pregnant. I have not yet decided what to do about this news but I am determined it will not prevent me from completing my thesis presentation or from joining you in Greece this summer. You know how ambitious I am and your encouragement has always been of the greatest importance to me. Please keep this information secret for now. I will be in touch before my scheduled presentation date.
Yours,
Pauline.
His head was in a whirl as he saw the future he had planned for this amazing young woman vanish, like a raindrop in a stream. How could she be so stupid as to risk everything in this way?
What was she thinking? Pregnancy at this stage in her education would be fatal.
He re-read the message then eliminated it. The second reading had brought his attention to the sentence, ‘I have not yet decided what to do about this news.’ Perhaps there was a chance she might abort the fetus. He could not bring himself to use the word child. If so, all might be saved. It would be up to him to persuade her when they worked together in Greece. He dared not discuss the topic in the environs of the university. There were always listening ears.
He tried several deep breaths to calm his nerves but this only increased his heart rate. What was happening to his life all of a sudden? Had contemplating retirement, and the changes this would involve, caused his entire life to veer off the rails?
His mind jumped back unexpectedly to his home life. The problems with Lynn were still to be resolved and now this issue with Pauline had become a million times more complex. The timing was so wrong.
He had serious decisions to make and their departure for Greece was imminent.
The situation with Pauline would have to wait until the summer course, but he must settle things with Lynn as soon as possible. The last thing he wanted was to go to the family Easter celebration with a wife who was aggrieved and unwilling to contribute even the minimum participation she usually managed to summon up. Family members would notice and questions would be asked for which he had no satisfactory answers.
He must do something today. It couldn’t wait. He opened the desk drawer and pulled out a file where he had been storing papers related to the purchase of land on Paros. It crossed his mind that he should probably have shared this step with his wife, but he dismissed the thought quickly. It was too late to fix that particular oversight. What could be done now, to make the new home more acceptable to Lynn?
He pored over the papers in the hopes that inspiration would strike. He had already mentioned to her that she would be consulted on every aspect of the design. What more could he add? How could he make the move to Greece more palatable to her?
Think!
It was difficult for him to put himself in Lynn’s shoes. It was not something he had normally to consider. His wife usually fell in with his plans without any debate, yet, on this issue, she was obdurate. He had to take her objections seriously or his plans would come to nothing. There was no chance of supporting two residences on his pension, even if he used all their savings. The question of what this would do to his marriage was not yet something he could contemplate.
A photograph of the site on the small bay near the ocean was attached to the offer of purchase.
He would not show this photograph to Lynn as the building was derelict nowadays. As a boy, he had often swum on the beach with his brothers and sisters then bought food from the restaurant where sandy feet and damp swimsuits were welcomed on the wide patio. It was a sad relic now and typical of the changes the economic disaster that was Greece had brought to small businesses. At the same time, he had to acknowledge that the same downturn had given him the opportunity to fulfil a dream he never expected to be able to bring to fruition.
What could be done with the site? The building restrictions required that a new structure should fit within the footprint of the original restaurant. This would mean some clever plan to utilize the space while providing an attractive and appealing home. Height could be a factor to impress Lynn. There would need to be sufficient space for bedrooms to accommodate Sarah and the grandchildren. This would be a major factor in his wife’s satisfaction with the move.
As he thought about the structure, Stavros realized he would need the services of an experienced architect. Suddenly, an idea struck him. If he could employ Lynn’s brother Philip to do this work, it might be possible to kill two birds with one stone, as it were. He had not yet met Philip, but the conversation about this brother had increased lately as Lynn puzzled about how to reconnect with him before it was too late. By all accounts, Philip Purdy was an esteemed architect. He might be persuaded to reduce his usual fees for a family member and also take this chance to learn more about his sister and her husband.
Stavros felt a weight lift from his mind. He stood and walked over to the window. The familiar view calmed him. All was not lost. Working with her brother on the house design would be an offer Lynn could hardly refuse. This one idea could turn the tide.
A quiet knock at his office door interrupted his ruminations.
He returned to his desk and shoved the file back in the drawer while inviting the students to enter.
By the time the two men and the girl had found seats at the conference table and opened their laptops. Stavros had switched to his professional mode and was ready to listen and respond. At the back of his mind, however, he retained a satisfied glow. Tonight he would sort everything out with his wife.
Normal life would resume.
As darkness fell, and Lynn closed the curtains in the lounge, she was aware that she had spent the entire day wandering through her home picking up one thing after another without accomplishing a single useful task. The tickets for Greece were lying on the kitchen table and she realized she had been staring at them for fifteen minutes without a cohesive thought in her mind.
Could she really allow her husband to leave for the Easter celebration without her? The very thought struck panic in her chest. This estrangement between them was something she had never known before and she was responsible for it. Guilt swept through her. The image of the role of a good wife, to which she had always clung, did not include setting her will against that of her husband. And yet, the alternative of capitulating to his wishes was inconceivable to her. What, if anything, could be done about this impasse?
Glancing at the clock she saw that Stavros could be heading home soon. The fact that she had not prepared anything for their evening meal was swept aside as irrelevant under the circumstances.
She could not concentrate on the domestic when matters of such vital importance to their marriage remained undecided.
In all the long years of their marriage, Lynn had never thought to deliver an ultimatum to her husband. When Stavros first came to England to visit her, the year following their meeting as student workers in a Greek island tourist hotel, he had proved his worth by instantly offering to help her out at home.
At this point of crisis, her beloved father was becoming severely depressed and sinking into a passive stage where he rarely left his bed. Her mother’s condition of mild dementia went into overdrive when she realized what was happening to Lynn’s father and she understood that he no longer wanted help from his wife.
Lynn was left alone to deal with this dire situation. Her older brother, Philip, had already fled to parts unknown so she was a teenager with responsibilities far beyond her capacity. Her mother required monitoring to ensure she took her prescribed medication and her father was too heavy for her to lift when he was comatose, or when his bed needed changing. Her mother had always impressed upon the girl how important it was that no social services should be involved in their family affairs. Isobel Purdy had a long-standing fear of authorities and passed this fear on to her daughter.
Lynn’s absences from school were becoming an issue and she was at the end of her tether with no family around to advise or assist her.
Stavros rode into this chaos like a knight on a white horse, taking charge of her father’s care and leaving Lynn more time to deal with her mother. She would never forget the gratitude she felt for this strong, handsome, foreigner who turned an innocent summer romance into a lifetime commitment.
They married at a registry office in the town hall and Stavros moved into the big old house permanently.
At first, it was a marriage of convenience, but before too long Lynn’s feelings of gratitude transformed into a deep and abiding appreciation for the unselfish qualities her husband had brought to her life.
Since then, no matter the trials they had encountered in the years when Stavros was applying for university admission, and when he struggled to attain his advanced qualifications, she had always known him as a tower of strength. Her own ambitions never rose above the level of ensuring her parents were cared for, her husband was supported, and their home was run as efficiently as possible. She had never worked outside the home and preferred to stay in the background while Stavros steadily made his way up the academic ladder.
When Sarah was born, he proved to be a loving father. Lynn knew then their bond was complete.
That bond was further cemented when Lynn had a series of miscarriages that devastated her confidence and reinforced her desire for a quiet life. Despite his own sorrow, Stavros stayed by her side, even in the darkest nights until their little girl’s needs overcame his wife’s grief. Sarah was to be her ‘one chick’ and the thought of being separated from her was insupportable.
No wonder she felt guilty. Although she recognized her own contribution to their marriage, there was no question in her mind that Stavros was responsible in great part for the purchase of their comfortable little home in the leafy suburb of Horam and for her contented life there.
Until now.
Her thoughts had been circling around in this way all day without a sensible idea presenting itself. She had to come up with a solution to the dilemma, and fast, or her marriage, and therefore her whole life, would be in jeopardy.
Stay in this house and deny Stavros his opportunity to build a house in Paros?
This could lead to separation and divorce and she would be alone.
Sell their home in England and move to Greece, far away from Sarah, David and the grandchildren?
This was not an option she could endure.
Move in with Sarah and family and let Stavros go?
There was no extra space in Sarah’s home and Lynn had always promised herself that she would not impose on her daughter in the way her mother had imposed her illness and dependence onto Lynn.
Which alternative was the most painful? Losing her home, her daughter or her husband? This thought stopped Lynn in her tracks. Did it come down to this, then? If so, which choice would be the most painful? She knew in her heart that she loved all three, but two of the choices were people rather than an object.
So, two choices, then: Stavros or Sarah? England or Greece?
“This is impossible!” she yelled out in anguish. “I can’t choose!”
Tears flooded down her cheeks and raw emotion drove her head onto her bent arms as sobs tore through her chest.
It was in this condition that Stavros found his wife when he came quietly through the front door.
The unexpected sound of her sobs struck him in the heart in a way that her anger never could.
In a rush came the memory of the only other times he had heard her cry like this. Each time she lost a much-desired baby through miscarriage, her sobs had wrung his very soul.
He knew this was a moment of vulnerability for Lynn. He acknowledged that, had he been a better man, he would have left her to weep until she recovered and opened the discussion about their future at a more opportune time for her. But, her very weakness gave him a huge advantage at this moment.
He had a plan to propose and, if the Gods were willing, he could at least delay the major decisions that threatened to divide their lives across a chasm that could never be bridged.
He breathed her name and crossed the kitchen floor in two steps, taking his wife into his arms and cradling her there with the rocking motions that reached deep into her insecurities and soothed her to the depth of her emotions.
When she had calmed a little, he began to whisper his plan in her ear.