Cheadle
22 October, 1983.

My dear Fiona,

I do not yet know whether I shall leave this manuscript for you to find, or whether it will be you I shall leave it for. We are a long-lived family, and a lot may yet happen in both our lives. But assuming I do, and it is you, I think you may find it easier to understand if I tell you how it came into existence.

It was written in two stages, the first almost thirty years before the second. In the summer of 1953 I had an absolute need to get the events of the previous ten months out of my system so that I could start creating some sort of a life for myself again. So I wrote the first part of this manuscript, put it in the bottom of a drawer, and let other unwanted papers accumulate on top of it.

Last year, partly as a result of your coming to stay at Cheadle, I found I needed to reconsider the details of those ten months, so I got the old manuscript out and read it through. It struck me, doing so, that I might show it to you to help you in the decision I was hoping you would make, but then, as more old history came to light, I discovered something which meant that it would be extremely unfair on my part to use it in an attempt to influence you. You will see why when you read it.

What I discovered was a considerable shock, though very different from the simple, primitive event I believed I was coping with in 1953. Besides, I had been a simple, primitive person then, and am no longer. But it still seemed necessary to use the same old simple magic. Write it out. Put it in a drawer. Bury it. Only this time for you (perhaps) to find.

I have been unable to refrain from adding a few modern footnotes to the older part of the manuscript, for instance where the gulf of time struck me most forcibly. I would not dare do this in my other books, for fear of irritating my readers, but here I have no one to please but myself.

And you. I mean this. I take great pleasure in pleasing you, so if you do read it, read it for pleasure, my dear.

Your loving aunt, M M