Fran pushed open the door to the tea shop at Rosewood and stood back to allow Holly to enter before her with the pushchair. She closed the door behind them, appreciating the warmth inside after the icy bite of the wind swirling around the yard outside. They headed for a table near the log burner and removed their coats before sitting down. She’d picked Holly up after delivering some pottery olive bowls to Greenacres, and she’d been worried when she’d seen how pale her friend was. The first thing they needed to do was to get some tea and cake into Holly, then they could continue their discussion about whether or not Holly was pregnant and, if so, what her next move would be.
Audrey Sanders approached the table with a small notepad and pencil. ‘Hello, ladies.’
Fran met the woman’s kind green eyes and returned the smile. ‘Hi, Audrey. How are you?’
‘Very good, thanks.’
‘I have a box of mugs in the car for you so you can check out the sample designs. I’ll bring it in before we leave.’
‘Thanks, Fran.’ Audrey smiled. ‘How are you, Holly?’
‘I’m fine, thanks, Audrey.’ Holly smiled at the older woman but Fran noticed that her eyes were guarded.
‘Glad to hear it. And how’s this beautiful little boy of yours?’ Audrey asked, leaning over the pushchair and smiling at the sleeping Luke, who hadn’t even stirred as he was transferred from car seat to pushchair.
‘He’s an absolute joy.’ Holly nodded. ‘Rich and I are very lucky.’
‘I don’t doubt you’ll want a little brother or sister for him at some point,’ Audrey said, still cooing over Luke.
Holly blanched and pushed her chair back then stood up. ‘Excuse me for a moment.’
As Holly hurried to the toilets, Fran met Audrey’s concerned gaze.
‘Must’ve been a sleepless night,’ she suggested. ‘Luke’s probably teething.’
Audrey nodded but Fran wasn’t certain that she was convinced.
‘I remember losing lots of sleep with my two girls when they had teeth coming through. Thankfully, it passes. Although then you lose sleep for all sorts of other reasons, like worrying about their school reports, if they’re eating enough vegetables, if they’re spending too much time on social media and if they’re safe when they go out on the town with their friends.’ Audrey shook her head. ‘Being a parent is wonderful but, between you and me, it’s incredibly stressful too.’
‘I can only imagine,’ Fran said as she pushed her glasses up her nose, hoping that Holly wouldn’t reappear in time to hear how having more than one child doubled the stress and worry.
‘Do you know what you’d like to order or shall I come back when Holly returns?’
‘I’ll order for us, thanks. She always goes for your delicious lemon drizzle cake, so I doubt she’d choose anything else.’
After Audrey had gone to make their drinks, Fran looked up to see Holly returning. She sat down slowly and placed shaky hands on the table in front of her.
‘Sorry about that. I think it could be just anxiety or it could be anxiety making the morning sickness worse, but I’ve been sick three times this morning already.’
‘Oh god, Hols.’
‘I know.’ Holly grimaced. ‘It’s exhausting. I went off wine when I was expecting Luke and I had some queasiness early on in the pregnancy, but I thought I had a bug or something and had no idea I was pregnant. This time though… if it definitely is because I’m pregnant… I feel even worse.’
They fell silent and Fran made a point of tidying the sachets of sugar in the small purple bowl on the table. When they were all neatly lined up, she took a deep breath.
‘Are you still unsure about whether this could be a good thing?’
Holly worried at her bottom lip and her eyes darted from side to side before she replied. ‘Yesterday, I was worried it was a possibility, then last night, I was sitting next to Rich on the sofa as he gave Luke his bottle and watching the two of them together just filled my heart with so much love. Granny and Dad were there too, and we’re such a happy family unit now. It all feels so secure and settled and I know how lucky I am. It made me think that having another baby wouldn’t be a bad thing at all. Yes, it’s true that the timing could have been better but then, it doesn’t make that much difference really. I mean… a new baby would surely bring more joy with him or her?’
Fran nodded then reached across the table and took Holly’s hand. ‘Of course it would. And yes, this is a bit of a surprise… as Luke is only just ten months old, but at least he and his sibling will be close in age.’
‘True.’ Holly nodded as she gazed down at her sleeping baby.
‘Hello.’
Fran turned to find a little girl with long blonde hair and big brown eyes standing next to her. She was wearing jeans embroidered with flowers and a long-sleeved pink top and she had a purple headband in her hair. Clutched in her hand was a brown toy dog with white spots on its fur.
‘Well, hello there.’ Fran smiled. ‘Who are you?’
‘I’m Tilly.’ The little girl stared down at her glittery blue trainers.
‘I’m Fran and this is Holly. We’re very pleased to meet you.’
‘Pleased to meet you too.’ Tilly smiled shyly at them.
‘I really like your trainers,’ Fran said.
‘Thank you. I like glittery things, which is why my dog is called Glitterbug.’
‘You have a dog?’ Fran asked. ‘I like dogs.’
‘Not a real dog.’ Tilly held up her toy dog. ‘This is Glitterbug.’
‘Ah, I see. Well hello, Glitterbug.’ Fran smiled at the toy.
‘Is this your baby?’ Tilly stepped closer to the pushchair.
‘This is Holly’s baby, Luke.’
‘He’s very small.’ Tilly sniffed. ‘Glitterbug says she likes him.’
‘I’m sure he’d like her too,’ Holly said.
‘Can I wake him up to find out?’ Tilly asked.
‘No!’ Holly exclaimed. ‘What I mean is… please don’t. He’s taking his nap and if you wake him he’ll be grumpy.’
Tilly giggled. ‘Like my daddy when I wake him up too early.’
Fran smiled. Tilly was so cute. ‘Who’s your dad, Tilly?’
‘Ethan. He works here.’
‘Does he?’ Fran frowned. ‘I don’t think I’ve met him. How long has he been here?’
Tilly shrugged. ‘Since yesterday. We came from our home in Bath. I like it here but I do miss my home and my friends from school.’
Fran didn’t know what to say. ‘Are you staying here then, Tilly?’
Tilly nodded. ‘I’m going to the school to be with Miss Brom… Miss Brom–w–ley.’
‘Miss Bromley?’ Fran asked.
‘Yes. My aunty said she’s very nice.’ Tilly returned her attention to the pram and lowered her face so her nose was almost touching Luke’s.
‘Tilly!’
She jumped at the sharp tone and Fran looked up to see a man hurrying over to them. He was tall and broad-shouldered with floppy blonde hair and a strong square jaw. In jeans and a grey T-shirt, he was casually attired but with that effortless style that only really handsome men seemed to pull off.
‘Tilly, I told you not to harass people. You’ll scare Audrey’s customers away.’
Tilly stepped away from the pushchair and hugged her toy dog to her chest. ‘I was just saying hello,’ she replied, her brown eyes so wide they seemed to dominate her tiny face.
‘She really was just saying hello.’ Fran stood up. ‘She wasn’t doing any harm, honestly.’
The man’s eyes darted to Fran’s face and she almost gasped at how green they were, reminding her of springtime ferns and freshly cut grass and sparkling rock pools all at once. Her heart pounded in her chest and she opened and closed her mouth as she struggled to take a breath.
‘She certainly wouldn’t have meant any harm,’ the man said, ‘but she was told not to wander around.’
‘She’s only young,’ Fran retorted, feeling a bit irritated now by this handsome stranger’s insensitivity. ‘And curious. Besides which, she was very polite.’
He blinked hard then sighed. ‘I’m sorry. I just… I was in the kitchen and I looked up and she’d wandered off and I… I panicked.’
Fran watched as his expression softened. Her own irritation faded away and was replaced with curiosity and a hint of compassion.
‘I’m okay, Daddy. See?’ Tilly held out her arms and turned around. ‘No harm done.’
The man smiled as he gazed at his daughter, then he swept her up in his arms and kissed her cheeks. ‘Yes you are, thank goodness. Now let’s go and sieve that flour or the scones will never be ready.’
‘Yes, Daddy!’ Tilly giggled.
‘Sorry.’ The man, who Fran guessed was Ethan, flashed an apologetic look at Fran then at Holly before carrying his daughter away.
Fran watched him go, wondering why her heart was still hammering in her chest. It was like she’d had too much caffeine today or like she’d just gone for a run, which she didn’t do that often because she rarely had time and she wasn’t that keen on running anyway – too much jiggling up and down. She’d prefer a good brisk walk or a bicycle ride any day.
‘Was that Alexander Skarsgård?’ Holly asked.
‘Who?’ Fran asked, meeting Holly’s eyes.
‘You know, the actor from Big Little Lies and True Blood.’
‘Ahhh…’ Fran nodded. ‘Yes, I guess he does look a bit like him.’
‘Very nice.’ Holly smiled, her queasiness apparently forgotten – for the moment at least.
‘And he has an adorable little girl.’
‘He does.’
‘So he’s likely got a beautiful wife or partner somewhere too.’ Fran chuckled. ‘Don’t they all?’
‘Do you fancy him, Fran?’
Fran lowered her gaze to the table and cleared her throat. ‘Absolutely not. I’ve no time for men, Holly, and you know that well enough.’
When she raised her eyes again, Holly was staring at her with her arms folded across her chest and her eyebrows raised.
‘One day, Francesca Gandolfini, you will fall head over heels for someone. You mark my words.’
Fran rolled her eyes. ‘Whatever. I’m not fussy on doing forward rolls or cartwheels, so I very much doubt it.’
‘Ha ha!’ Holly shook her head.
Audrey arrived then with their tea and cake, changing the direction of the conversation that had started to make Fran quite uncomfortable.
‘Here you go, ladies. Can I get you anything else?’
‘No, this is perfect, thank you.’ Fran’s mouth watered at the thick golden slices of lemon drizzle cake with the crusty lemon-sugar topping. Audrey’s lemon drizzle cake was always a delicious mix of lightweight sponge and incredible flavours, both sweet and sour, zesty and tangy.
‘Uh… Audrey?’ Holly placed a hand on the tea shop owner’s arm.
‘Yes, Holly?’
‘We were wondering who the tall man is.’
Audrey frowned.
‘The one with floppy blonde hair and the little girl. I think his daughter said his name is Ethan?’
‘Oh!’ Audrey beamed at them and nodded. ‘That’s my nephew, Ethan Clarke, my brother’s boy, and his little girl, Tilly. They’ve come to live here at Rosewood. He’s had a…’ Audrey grimaced. ‘I probably shouldn’t say too much but he’s had a tough few years, my nephew. After our chef quit, I offered him a job here and thankfully, he accepted.’
‘So has he moved here with his daughter and partner?’ Holly asked.
Fran glared at her and shook her head.
‘Oh no.’ Audrey folded her hands in front of her. ‘It’s just him and Tilly, the poor loves. But they’re with family now so we’ll take care of them both.’
‘I’m sure you will.’ Holly nodded.
‘Yes, they need some proper old-fashioned Cornish TLC.’
‘They’ve come to the right place,’ Fran said, knowing how much Audrey adored her family.
‘Thank you, Fran. I’m relieved to have them here at last. I was worried about them being alone in Bath all that time. Anyway, just call if you want more tea or anything else.’ Audrey headed back to the counter.
‘Why did you ask if he was here with a partner?’ Fran sighed, horrified at her friend’s behaviour.
‘It was an innocent enough question.’ Holly picked up her cup and blew on the hot tea.
‘No, it wasn’t. It seemed really nosy and like you had an ulterior motive.’ Fran sipped her own tea, hoping it would help to soothe her.
‘What ulterior motive could I possibly have?’ Holly pouted at Fran.
‘Oh, whatever. I know you too well, Holly Dryden, and you were plotting something then, and seeing as how you’re about to marry the man you love, Audrey probably realised that you were asking for more information with your very single friend in mind.’
‘Perhaps I was, perhaps I wasn’t. But I really don’t think Audrey even raised an eyebrow. She’s just happy to talk about her family.’ Holly smiled. ‘Do you… do you have the… the thing?’ Holly asked, her voice softer now.
‘The test?’
‘Yes.’
Fran nodded then reached into her bag and pulled out a small foil packet. She’d taken the test out of the box so it would be easier to tuck into her bag.
‘Here you go.’
She handed it to Holly under the table.
‘It looks like we’re up to something untoward.’ Holly blushed. ‘I hope no one noticed anything.’
‘Are you going to do it now?’
‘I’ll just eat my cake first.’
‘That’s procrastinating.’ Fran winked at her friend.
‘I know, but I’m nervous.’
‘That it will be positive?’
‘That it might be and also… that it might not be.’
‘There’s only one way to quieten those doubts.’
‘I know, but it feel like Russian roulette. Either way, the so-called bullet could be the one that floors me.’
‘Try not to worry, Holly. If it’s meant to be…’
‘It’s meant to be.’ Holly nodded. ‘I know and I certainly can’t change the outcome now.’
After Holly had eaten her lemon drizzle cake, chewing each mouthful slowly, she stood up. ‘Here goes…’
‘Holly?’ Fran reached out a hand and Holly took it. ‘Good luck, sweetie. You’ve got this either way.’
Holly looked as if she might cry and Fran wanted to hug her, but knew that if she did in the middle of the tea shop, Holly might burst into tears and people would stare, and ask questions, and neither of those would be helpful right now.
Ethan helped Tilly to wash her hands then he settled her on a stool at the island in the centre of the tea shop kitchen. They were both wearing hairnets and aprons and Tilly kept laughing at him, telling him he looked funny. She had never been to work with him before, so this was quite a novel experience for them both. Her tongue poked out of her mouth as she used the star shape to cut biscuits from the dough they’d made. Ethan was in charge of the scones for the tea shop but he’d given Tilly her own task to get on with and she was taking it very seriously.
‘Daddy?’ Tilly asked without looking up.
‘Yes?’
‘Would you like another baby?’
He coughed in surprise. ‘Pardon?’
‘Well… I was looking at the baby with the two ladies and he’s so cute and I thought, does Daddy want a baby too?’
‘I don’t need a baby, Tilly, I have you.’
‘But we could have a baby brother for me, couldn’t we?’ Tilly looked up now and smiled at him so innocently that he thought his heart would break.
‘Uh… Tilly… a baby needs… uh… a mummy too. We… you and me, that is… can’t have a baby without a mummy.’
She tutted and shook her head. ‘I know that, silly, so you’ll have to find a new mummy to have a baby for you, won’t you?’
She returned her attention to the cutting of stars and Ethan swallowed hard. He worried so much about Tilly not having a mum around and yet she constantly surprised him with her resilience. The problem was that she still had such a simple perspective on it all, and for Ethan, as an adult who’d had been hurt and disillusioned, nothing was simple any more. Nothing at all…
And the last thing he wanted was for his pain to seep out into all aspects of his life. Look at how he’d behaved out in the tea shop when Tilly had wandered off and he’d seen her with the two women and the baby. His first concern had been that Tilly was safe, his second that she was bothering the women and his third that he had reacted so snappily. That wasn’t who he was, but sometimes the worry and the pressure of being a single dad and now moving and starting a new job mounted up, and he wondered where it would all go. He’d been rude and he regretted it now. All he could do was hope that it didn’t deter his aunt’s customers from coming to the tea shop again.
Especially the petite woman with the short red-brown hair and trendy black-framed glasses. She’d had unusual coloured eyes, some deep purplish-blue shade that had made him falter when he met them full on. Her lips had been a bold bright red and she’d been wearing some kind of black floaty top with jeans and boots. She was certainly very attractive and she had that air of self-confidence that suggested that she knew her worth and could take care of herself. Since Melanie, Ethan rarely noticed if a woman was good-looking. In fact, he hadn’t found himself drawn to any woman in any way, because he’d been unable to see past his hurt and his concerns for Tilly. But for some reason, today he had felt a flutter in his chest when he’d met the woman’s eyes and he’d even admired the way she’d stood up to him in defending his daughter. Not that he’d been annoyed with Tilly at all, just worried about where she’d gone and then concerned that she was disturbing customers, but even so… In the very short time he’d been near the stranger, he had seen fire and strength in her and it had briefly ignited something inside him, as if a part of him had remembered something he used to feel, something he used to know.
He sighed.
It was gone now, whatever it was – a flicker of physical attraction or a primal recognition of a kindred spirit, or possibly just admiration of her pretty eyes and confident demeanour. It was surely natural to notice other human beings and it didn’t have to mean anything.
‘Daddy?’ Tilly cut through his thoughts.
‘Yes?’
‘Can I eat these now?’ She picked up a floppy star, making him laugh.
‘Not yet, Tilly, we need to pop them in the oven for a bit first.’
‘Okay.’ She nodded. ‘But then I’m having five.’
‘Five?’ He feigned mock horror.
‘Okay, four, but only so I have some room leftover for a scone.’
‘Deal.’
He looked at his little girl, wearing a white apron that was too big for her, with her long hair held back in a hairnet and her innocent brown eyes, and his heart ached. She was his whole world and he would do anything for her.
Anything at all.