CLUB LIFE
The problems at
Wimbledon seem
to be that the club
has suffered a loss
of complacency.
All Nottingham has is Robin
Hood. And he’s dead.
Robert Maxwell’s just bought
Brighton and Hove Albion. He’s
furious that it’s only one club.
As a small boy I was torn between
two ambitions: to be a footballer or
to run away and join a circus. At
Partick Thistle I got to do both.
When I played with Barnsley it was
a small-town club with a chip on its
shoulder. Later I went to Millwall, a
club with a chip on both shoulders.
The two best clubs in
London are Stringfellows
and The Hippodrome.
The last time Nottingham were
five points ahead of anybody
was in a cricket match.
When you’ve been given a free
transfer by Rochdale you worry
seriously about your future.
Watching Manchester
City is probably
the best laxative
you can take.
Southampton is a very well-
run football team from Monday
to Friday. It’s Saturdays
we have a problem with.
Sheffield United couldn’t hit
a cow’s arse with a banjo.
Too big to be a wee club and
too wee to be a big club.
When I was at St Mirren’s,
it was a desolate place. Even
the birds woke up coughing.
If Everton were playing down
at the bottom of my garden,
I’d draw the curtains.
After I joined Celtic I was
walking down a street in Glasgow
when someone shouted ‘Fenian
bastard’. I had to go and
look it up. Fenian, that is.