Molly
Finding Help
Was that a shooting star? Molly gazed up through the gaping hole in the roof of this bombed-out house, where she’d spent her time since escaping the brothel. The clear sky above, though wondrous, was like a sequinned blanket of fear, as on such a clear night as this the Luftwaffe were bound to visit. When would it end?
Easing her stiff body off the cold remains of an inner wall, Molly pulled her blanket around her. Though damp now, it still afforded some warmth. She didn’t know how many days had passed. All of them had merged together. Most had been spent in a haze of crying when awake, and when asleep in terrifying dreams of ugly men with fat bodies plucking pieces of her until she was just a skeleton. Through it all, excruciating pain assailed her.
A fit of coughing seized her. Her chest hurt and she wondered if she was getting pneumonia, as poor Ruby had done. She didn’t want to die. Somehow she must find the strength to get out of here and seek help.
Feeling her way back down into the cellar, where she’d spent most of her time, she groped around in the darkness, making for the corner where she’d hidden the money she’d brought with her. Nothing! Oh God, where is it? I know I put it behind this broken pipe. I know I did. Searching frantically along the wall to the opposite corner, she ran her fingers all round the area once more, thinking she might have the wrong corner, but there weren’t even any pipes there. Help me. Oh God, help me. I have to have money!
Exhausted after finding nothing in any of the corners, Molly flopped down on the bottom step of the cellar. Defeated and in despair, she tried to think what could have happened to her stash. Even the cardigan she’d wrapped it in was gone. Someone must have sought shelter down here and found her money. Maybe they had even watched her come down here with her bag and gas mask. My bag!
Finding strength from somewhere, Molly renewed her search, shuffling over every inch of the small space in the hope of kicking against her bag. Tripping on some debris, she cried out in agony as she landed heavily on the ground. But then she knew a moment of hope as her hand landed on her gas mask. Pulling it to her, she patted the ground around it. At last she had to accept that her bag had gone, as the two had been together, next to where she’d lain down. Tears of frustration stung her eyes. Everything she had in the world had been taken.
After a moment of thinking through what she could do, she decided to go back up the steps to the ground floor of the house. She’d heard water running up there. At least she could get a drink and try to wash herself as best she could.
Once in the only part of the room that still stood, Molly could see better. The full moon lit the area around her. Taking stock of herself, she could see that at least the coat she had on still looked reasonable, if a little crumpled.
Walking carefully, she followed the sound of the water. Gushing from a broken pipe and sparkling in the moonlight, the flow resembled a waterfall. After drinking her fill and easing the discomfort of her dry, cracked lips, Molly braved putting her head under it, to rinse her hair and face. She felt as if she’d been plunged into an ice-bucket, and had to force herself to stay there long enough to remove the clinging dirt from her. When this was done, she took off her coat and other garments. Most had kept fairly clean, from being covered by the blanket, though she knew she couldn’t wear her knickers again; she’d just have to go without. Luckily, the skirt Trixie had ready for her to change into, on the day she’d left, had been a long one that reached to her calves.
Stepping under the water was something she couldn’t subject her shivering body to, but she did her best by catching handfuls of water to rub over herself, to freshen and clean herself as much as she could. Now she had to avoid touching anything, as everywhere was blackened and charred. It wasn’t easy to get her clothes back over her wet body, or to squeeze her swollen feet back into her shoes, but she managed it, after a struggle. The effort warmed her and gave her some comfort. Once dressed, she ran her tongue over her coated teeth and thought to use the trick she’d told Ruby of: cleaning them with soot.
She only had her finger to use as a brush, but she wiped it along the nearest wall and used the residue to rub her teeth. The taste was of stale smoke, and it took several rinses to remove the tang. The effect was good, though, because now her teeth at least felt less coated.
Though weak with hunger, Molly climbed over the rubble and managed to get outside onto the pavement. A blacked-out world met her. The houses and skeletons of buildings showed no light, and no street lamps were lit, though a few cars passed by with dimmed lights, and there were still some people making their way in the moonlight to whatever destination summoned them. At last she arrived at the corner where she’d met the ARP warden and the firemen. She hoped against hope she would find the warden’s house. But what she discovered was utter devastation.
A gaping hole a few yards into the road had a smashed bus protruding from it. The sight undid Molly, and she slumped against the bottom half of a ruined building and stared at what must have become a grave. Shock racked her body.
A voice penetrated her despair. ‘Oi! What’re yer up to, Miss? You shouldn’t be out here, it’s too dangerous.’
An ARP warden approached her, shining a powerful torch into her face. She cowered away from its beam. When he got up to her, he asked her again what she was doing, then said, ‘Hey, you’re all wet. What’s happened to yer?’
When her eyes got used to the light, she could see that he wasn’t the same man who had offered her help before. Remembering that day, and Derrick, the old man dressed as Santa, she said, ‘I’m looking for the Copper Kettle Cafe.’
‘Well, you’ll look for a long time, as it’s gone, lav. All round here went on the night of 29th December. What a night, eh? I thought London would be no more and we’d all perish. Hundreds did. Poor buggers.’
Molly remembered; of course, it’d been the night after she’d met Flo. A terrifying and intense attack had taken place, as if the Germans were throwing everything they had at them in one night. Telling the warden now that she had nowhere to go, she asked if he could direct her to the nearest Salvation Army depot.
‘If yer go back to Poland Street, lav, yer bound to see one. But failing that, get yerself down the Underground. Good luck.’
Adjusting to the light once the warden had moved off, Molly turned round to retrace her steps. Back on the main road, she felt exposed. She was too near the brothel and Trixie’s stamping ground, and might meet someone she knew at any moment.
Two uniformed male figures came towards her, although she couldn’t quite make out which service they were in. But when one spoke, she knew they were Canadian; there were a lot of Canadian airmen stationed at Biggin Hill. ‘Good evening, ma’am. We’re in London looking for a good time. How about you tell us where to go, eh?’
His question gave her an idea. Repulsed by the thought of it, desperation made her carry it through. ‘I can show you a good time, mate. I don’t charge much. If you both have me, I’ll ask for ten bob off each of you.’
‘Done. Where can we go?’
‘No. It’s not done, Spike. Ignore him, ma’am.’ The taller of the two, and the one supporting the drunken Spike, peered at her closely as he said this. He didn’t show any disdain, only concern. ‘Hey, you don’t look well, ma’am. Can we be of assistance to you?’
Feeling embarrassed and lower than she’d ever been, Molly just wanted to get away from them. ‘Thanks, but I’ll manage. I’m just hungry and have nowhere to go – it’s par for the course, for us Londoners. I’ll be fine. I’ll find some help.’
‘We’ll help you, ma’am. We won’t leave you till you’re settled somewhere.’
‘Ha, we’ll take you up an alley. You’ll be settled there, when we’ve done with you.’
‘Shut up, Spike. Excuse him, ma’am, he’s not usually like this.’
‘She said she’d show us a good time, Art. What’s the matter with you? You said earlier that you needed a woman.’
Propping Spike against the wall, Art told him, ‘Listen, Spike, I’ve had enough. I’m going for the train now, and I’m going to take this young lady with me and get her some goddamn help from that Salvation Army station we saw near there. Are you coming or not?’
‘Hell, no, man. I ain’t playing no guardian angel. I’m in London – Soho, the place of whores and drink – and I want a good time. We might be dead tomorrow.’
The fear of her proximity to Eva’s place, and to the area where the girls worked, was making Molly nervous. Without thinking of the consequences, she blurted out, ‘There’s a brothel in Beak Street, just around the corner from here. Only don’t mention having seen me, as I’m trying to escape from there. It’s above a tailor’s shop. Just ring the bell of the shop.’
‘That’s where I’m headed, then. You can go to hell, Art. I’m going to have me a woman.’ As if this thought had sobered him, Spike stood up straight and marched off.
‘I’m torn, ma’am. I should go after him, but he’s hard to handle when he’s like this.’
‘He’s a grown man. If he gets into trouble, it’s not your fault.’ Molly was warming to Art. A big man and from what she could see a handsome one, he had a nice, caring way. Despite her appearance, he hadn’t rejected her, nor had he taken up her offer or let Spike take it. She felt ashamed of acting the way she had. What must he think of her?
‘You’re right, ma’am. He can fend for himself. I have to make my way to Victoria station, to catch a train to Shoreham. Whenever I make the trip to the station from the Thames end, I see a Salvation Army van near Vauxhall Bridge. I’ve been that way today. I live near a river at home, and the Thames draws me to it. What say we get a cab and head there? I’d like to bet the Salvation Army are still there. They’ll help you.’
Molly couldn’t speak; it was as if her whole body let go, now that someone was going to help her.
Art managed to get a taxi. It seemed easy for him. The Canadians had more money than they knew what to do with in broken-down London. They only had to raise their arms and they were tended to, wherever they went. Molly could imagine Eva rubbing her hands together in glee when Spike turned up there. Poor bloke would have nothing left in his pocket by the time he left. A small part of her was cheered by this. Spike was bent on paying to have a woman. If there weren’t men such as him, there’d be no trade for those who exploited women.
The warmth of the cab soothed her. Art held her to him in a gentle hug. ‘Rest against me, ma’am. We’ll soon be there.’
It seemed no time at all before he told her they had arrived at Vauxhall. Molly opened her eyes. She hadn’t remembered anything of the three miles or so they’d travelled, and yet she hadn’t thought she’d dropped off to sleep.
‘There – look, that’s the van I told you about. Hold on to my arm.’
There was a queue at the van, but Molly didn’t care. At last it was possible that she would have a connection to Flo. She only hoped that those who helped out on these vans knew of Flo, even though they were miles from where she’d met her.
Two women manned the van. One had a WRVS band on her arm. Molly felt a pang of guilt as she looked at her. Though she’d wanted to, she hadn’t done anything for the war effort, and yet here was this woman doing her bit, and she must be sixty if she was a day.
The other one was a younger woman, smallish and hardly able to see over the counter, but with a nice, homely face. A real cockney, she was having plenty of banter with her customers.
‘Last time I was here I saw a girl,’ Art told Molly. ‘She was tall and had chestnut hair and the bluest eyes, and a cute little chink in her nose. I sat over there and watched the girls working, and I fell in love with her and was hoping she’d be here again today.’
‘Crikey, Art, I think that’s the same girl I’m looking for. Her name’s Flo. I’m hoping these women know where I can contact her because when I met her Flo said she’d be willing to help me, if I needed it. And I’m sure she meant it.’
‘You know her? That’s incredible! Gee, what’s she like? I’d give my right arm to meet her.’
‘You have got it bad, mate. But do you know what? I’d give my right arm, an’ all, just to see her again. She’s got a kindly way and makes you feel as everything will be all right, if she’s helping you.’
‘The queues are getting smaller. Go forward and ask.’
Molly started to go forward, but on letting go of Art’s arm she found that her legs wouldn’t hold her. Her body swayed. Everything near her swivelled round, as though she was on a merry-go-round.
‘Blimey, girl, you’re in a state. Let’s help yer up.’
Molly knew she’d been carried somewhere, but was still disorientated. ‘Where am I?’
‘Yer in the back of the Salvation Army van. What’s your name, lav?’
‘Molly.’
‘I’m Pauline. Yer all right now, Molly. We’ll sort yer out.’
‘I – I want Flo.’
‘I know yer do. That nice bloke who was with you told us. He’s had to go and catch his train. But he said if ever yer need him, or if yer find Flo, you can write to Biggin Hill RAF station. He said to let him know where Flo is. What’s he want with her, then?’
‘He fancies her.’
‘Blimey, he’d better get in the queue then, as she’s smitten with another. Anyway, he left his name and address on a piece of paper for yer. Here, get a sip of this tea into yer. I’ve even managed to put some sugar in it. We had some given to us today, and I’ve been letting the neediest have it. It’ll give you some energy.’
As Pauline had said, the energy seeped back into Molly, the more she drank of the delicious tea.
‘Now then, we know what that bloke wants with Flo, but what is it you’re after? Only she ain’t here till tomorrow.’
‘She said if ever I was in trouble, she’d help me. I’ve got nothing, and nowhere to go.’
‘If Flo said that, then I’ll help yer. I can do that much for Flo. Have yer been bombed out, lav?’
Molly hesitated. She didn’t want to tell the woman why she was homeless and down on her luck.
‘Makes no odds, lav. I’ll sort yer out. I’ve to finish up here first, though. You sit there a mo. We close up in a bit, then you can come back to me house with me. I live on me own, so there’s plenty of room. I’ll make you up a nice clean bed – that’s if you don’t mind sharing, as we only have one up and one down. And I’ll soon have some hot water on the go, so yer can have a good wash down and put one of me winceyette nighties on. Then we’ll see what’s to be done. I’ve a nice bit of stew simmering on me stove as well. How does all that sound, eh?’
Molly was struck dumb. Her tears spoke for her as she smiled through them. Part of her smile was for the comfort that she felt coming from Pauline, and part of it was for the thought of that nightie. A feeling of being overwhelmed by the woman’s kindness took hold of her. How things had changed. But for small pockets of communities, Londoners never used to give each other the time of day, and now they opened up their homes to strangers in need.
By the time Molly was tucking into the stew, she thought she’d landed in heaven. Pauline was lovely, and even though Molly had told Pauline her story, she didn’t judge her.
‘That’s a lot for you to go through, girl. I’ve been at rock bottom, an’ all, so I know what it feels like.’
Molly listened to how Pauline had been bombed out and had dealt with her husband being away, her mum living by the bottle, and now having her kids away somewhere in Wales.
‘Flo helped me, yer know. She were standing on the bridge back there, when she saw me coming. Loaded up, I was. And she carried some of me things. She even gave me five bob. I couldn’t believe it. I was bleedin’ down, I can tell yer. I was ready for giving up. But that one kind gesture – and someone caring enough to make it – changed things for me. Me mum’s all right now, and me kids are, an’ all. And me old man: well, poor bloke has to take his chances, but I pray every day that he comes back to me. Anyway, after what Flo did for me, I vowed that once I could, I would help others.’
This fitted well with the Flo that Molly had in her mind, even though she’d only met her for a few moments.
‘Flo reached out to me, an’ all, only I couldn’t take up her offer then. But thanks for what you’ve done for me, Pauline. I was desperate. And I feel the same, about helping others. I want to do war work. Sometimes, I have to admit, the idea of joining up was just an escape route, no matter where it took me. But now I really want to do me bit.’
Huddled up as she was by the roaring fire and with the lovely Pauline, Molly felt safe for the first time in many months. She loved the feel of the soft nightdress, and how it hung down to her feet and buttoned up to her neck. It seemed, to her, to wrap her in love and gave her a feeling that she really might have a chance at a new beginning. Well, she intended to take it. She prayed that Delilah would keep her promise and turn in Eva’s evil gang.
With Delilah being on the list of reported missing, the police would have to listen to her. Especially as it would be away from London, where a lot of the coppers were in Eva’s pay. Molly’s thoughts turned to Eva now, and then to her dad. Would he go to prison, too? She didn’t want this to happen, but suddenly she didn’t care any more. He’d turned his back on his own, in order to make money. He deserved to go to jail, and a big part of her wished that he would.
‘Molly. Molly! Eeh, lass, wake up.’
Hearing Flo’s voice made Molly feel that everything was going to be all right with her world. She opened her eyes and looked into Flo’s huge blue ones.
‘By, you’re a sleepyhead, lass. I’ve been trying to wake you these five minutes since. I’ve brought you a cuppa and some breakfast. Can you sit up?’
It wasn’t easy to, but Molly managed to sit up enough for Flo to put the tray she was carrying in front of her.
‘There, lass. I hope you like porridge, as that’s all there is.’
‘Flo! Oh, Flo, it’s good to see you.’
‘And you. You got away then? By, I was reet glad when I called round this morning and Pauline told me you were here. It were like a miracle, as I’d made up me mind to find you, no matter what it took. I couldn’t get you out of me head.’
‘I wanted to take up your offer that night, but Trixie didn’t trust the bloke with you.’
‘Simon? He’s one of the best blokes you’ll ever meet. He was a bit on his guard that night, as he was being overprotective of me. He thinks I act on what me heart tells me to do, without thinking things through. He’s reet as well, but it’s never landed me in trouble yet.’
‘I hope your heart thinks me worthy of you helping me, Flo, as I’ve no other options at the moment. I will have, once I’m well, as I’m going to join up.’
‘Aye, Pauline’s been telling me. It’ll be the best thing for you. You’ll be taken care of, and out of the clutches of them as have done this to you. Me and Pauline have been having a natter, and Pauline’s willing for you to stay here with her. I’ll help her by paying towards your keep. How’s that sound, eh?’
‘I don’t know what to say. I can’t thank you enough. I’ll pay you back, Flo. Every penny.’
‘We’ll see.’
‘Flo, I have to tell you something. No one must know I’m here. That gang I told you of, they’ll be looking for me. Me life’s in danger. I did a daft thing last night, but I wasn’t thinking right.’
Molly told Flo about the Canadian airmen, Art and Spike, and how she’d sent one of them to Eva’s. ‘If he tells them a woman sent him, they’ll be curious and will ask what I looked like.’
‘Eeh, Molly, it’s a frightening world you live in. Are you sure they’ll be asking him? And even if they do, how could it lead them here?’
‘Because they’d know that all of their girls are in the house, so a woman sending a man to their brothel at that time in the evening would raise their suspicions as to who it was. They’re always on their guard, but will be even more so, as two of us have now absconded. If they asked Spike if he knew where I was, he would know that I was heading for the Salvation Army van, as Art told him.’
‘Don’t worry, love. I’m sure nowt will happen. Though it were an amazing coincidence that you were brought to the very van Pauline was working in, and where I’m to work today. Eeh, I’m reet glad, though.’
Molly laughed, then winced at the pain it caused her. ‘Not such a coincidence as you might think. Art’s seen you working there and took a fancy to you. He was hoping to see you again. They’ve been past the van when they’ve come up to London, as Art always makes for the Thames from Victoria station, before they go anywhere.’
Flo blushed. ‘Eeh, go on with you! Though, I can remember two Canadians stopping by to say hello, when Simon and me worked with Pauline. It was our first time helping out in her van. I remember that the tall one asked how they could donate some money to help our cause; he was reet good-looking. Pauline showed him the box we keep for contributions and he put a whole pound note in it.’
‘That’ll be Art. I reckon you’ve made a conquest there.’
‘Ha-ha. Not such an ugly duckling then.’
‘Course you’re not – you’re beautiful, Flo.’
Flo blushed again, then changed the subject. ‘Anyroad, try not to worry. The woman as took care of me from when I was a youngster allus says that half of what you worry about has already happened, and the other half will probably never happen. I’ll have a word with Pauline. I’m sure she won’t be changing her mind about you staying with her, but like you say, it’s better that we knaw. Now, eat up your porridge. As much as you might not like it, it’s good for you.’
As Flo left the room, Molly felt glad she’d found Flo. Even if it was in the most unlikely way. Flo was a good person, and Molly looked on her as the only one who could help her. But there was more to it than that. Molly felt an affinity with Flo, as if she’d known her all her life – and hoped she would do for the rest of it.