Thank God it’s Friday.
Heavenly sat in the metal chair next to the nurses’ lockers at the back of the ER and groaned in relief as she tore off the ratty athletic shoes that had long ago ceased to support her instep. The hole near the heel would soon become noticeable. Tomorrow, she’d have to find the time—and money—to search the second-hand shops for another pair, before she started her new job. Of course she’d rather spend the holidays with her father, in case this was their last together. That hurt, but she had to be realistic. And practical. Since the break from school afforded her time, she had to spend every possible moment making money to cover their mounting bills.
She’d never waitressed before, but she was willing to work hard. The tips at this place were supposedly generous—not surprising since the uniform barely covered the essentials. In time, she’d get over her self-consciousness. She hoped.
With a sigh, Heavenly opened her locker. Thankfully, she found her backpack and its contents untouched. Even better, the few precious dollars she possessed were still in her wallet.
During her first few days at the hospital, the nurses had played some harmless pranks on her, which she’d written off as hazing. But the following week, someone had painted a slur inside her locker. A few days later, her forty dollars for groceries had disappeared. Heavenly suspected Kathryn was responsible. The nurse specialist had become particularly petulant once Dr. Beckman turned attentive and protective.
Heavenly shoved her shoes in her backpack with a sigh and donned her sandals. As she made her way toward the street exit, she spotted Dr. Beckman in the lobby, lounging in one of the chairs and glancing at his watch. Was he waiting for someone?
She hadn’t seen him since he’d left the party abruptly. The insecure part of her had worried he no longer wanted to spend time with her because he saw her as the little girl he always called her. She’d missed lunches with him, not because he made sure she ate every day, even in his absence, though that was nice. No, each moment she spent with him, she soaked him up like a sponge—his dissecting intelligence, his robust laugh, his cutting humor, his dark eyes that held a hint of the devil.
At the sight of him, her heart skipped a beat. “Dr. Beckman?”
His head snapped up, and he stood. “I was hoping to catch you. Sorry I haven’t been at lunch the last couple of days. A few patients with difficult conditions and…”
He’d sought her out to apologize and explain? Oh, my gosh. She smiled in giddy relief. Having him near again made Heavenly’s world feel right once more.
“How dare those life-or-death patients be so demanding?”
“Yes, well… Thankfully, they’re going to live.”
“Of course. They have you.”
She shouldn’t flirt when he didn’t want more than a professional relationship, and she tried not to. But nothing changed the fact that he made her both gooey and shivery at once.
Then again, so did Seth.
And that baffled her.
For the hundredth time since Raine’s party, the big blond PI’s verbal seduction whispered through her head and made her ache.
When she saw him again, would he seduce her with more than his voice? Would he actually put his hands and his mouth on her? She’d loved the idea when she lay alone on her pallet at night, tuning out her father’s gentle snoring as she touched herself and tried to find the mythical pleasure called orgasm. Of course, she thought of Dr. Beckman then, too.
“Heavenly?”
Feeling herself blush, she blinked up at him. The doctor watched her every expression.
Gosh, here she was talking to one man she had less-than-platonic feelings for while fantasizing about the other. It happened whenever she was with either of them. Why did she have those feelings for them both? What did that make her?
A ridiculous girl with pie-in-the-sky fantasies.
“Yes. Sorry. Hi.”
Dr. Beckman stepped closer, dropping his voice. “Are you all right?”
“I’m good. Happy to see you.”
“How have you been?”
“Fine. You?”
He studied her more intently. “I’m sorry I couldn’t stay at the party. I heard you left abruptly, too. What happened?”
Raine’s gathering had begun with so much promise…and ended so terribly when her father had called to say that he’d fallen near the kitchen and hit his head. “Nothing much. I didn’t stay long because a friend needed my help.”
“Before you left, I heard you and Seth were deep in conversation.”
“Yes.” She breathed the word more than spoke it. “We talked.”
Now Dr. Beckman scowled. “Did he come on to you?”
Did he ever…
She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and smiled. “He might have.”
“And?”
Heavenly was capable of taking care of herself, but she adored the way Dr. Beckman protected her. Maybe that was simply his nature or maybe he just felt sorry for the shy girl. If he thought she was too inept to take care of herself, she didn’t really want to know.
“Oh, don’t worry. It wasn’t creepy, like Dr. Manning. It was…nice. More than nice, actually.” She sighed. “No one has ever talked to me like that.”
She didn’t think he’d mind hearing about her feelings for another man since he’d never given her any romantic vibes. Even when Dr. Manning had accused him of wanting her, he’d totally denied it. While Raine was fast becoming a friend, Dr. Beckman was probably the best one she had right now. He listened so well… She needed to appreciate the rapport they shared and stop wishing for more.
“How did he talk to you?” he demanded. “What did he say?”
She wouldn’t repeat Seth’s words. They were private, his gift to her. Sure, he’d likely just been flirting to pass the time at a party where he didn’t know many of the guests, either. But his attention had meant the world to her.
“Things that made me feel pretty and special.” Not to mention sexy, which she’d never felt until that moment.
The doctor’s scowl deepened into something furious. Oops. He’d been clear about his opinion of the PI. Of course he wasn’t happy she hadn’t heeded his advice. Heavenly made a mental note not to mention Seth next time she saw Dr. Beckman.
“Um…I-I should go,” Heavenly said, though she hated to leave him.
“Wait. Listen to me, little girl. You—”
A honking horn interrupted whatever he’d been about to say. When she glanced up, she spied a familiar rental car at the curb—and an even more familiar face peering out from the open window, golden hair glinting in the California sunshine.
Seth.
He waved. Her heart jumped. She sent him an excited smile in return.
Dr. Beckman whirled to peer out the glass, then zipped back to her, looking irritated. “Did you know he was coming?”
“No.” Gosh, there was her breathless, dreamy voice again. “It’s a complete surprise.” But a nice one, so she shouldn’t keep him waiting. “You’re on vacation next week, right? Going to see family for Christmas?”
“Yeah.” He raked a hand through his hair before sidestepping to block her view of Seth. “I’ll be back on the thirty-first. You have plans for the holiday?”
“Staying here. I took a waitressing job to make some extra money. I have a silly uniform and I’ll be serving a bunch of big ol’ kids with sticky fingers.” Not for anything would she embarrass herself and tell an esteemed professional like Dr. Beckman that she had stooped to working at a place like Bazookas. “Not fun, but it will pay a few bills.” When Seth honked again, she smiled at the doctor before daring to step up on her tiptoes and kiss his cheek. “Have a great holiday. I hope we can resume our lunches when you get back. Bye.”
Before she could see whether her impulsive peck had annoyed him, she turned and pressed her hand to her suddenly tingling lips. Shoving aside the useless wish that he would have kissed her mouth, she ran out the hospital’s revolving door—and into Seth’s waiting arms.
He’d exited the car and now leaned up against the driver’s side. When he pulled her close, Heavenly’s heart thudded all over again. “What brings you here?”
“You.” He cupped her cheek, lifting her gaze to his. “Did you really think I wouldn’t want to see you again after Raine’s party?”
She’d hoped but hadn’t dared to expect. Now she couldn’t hold back her smile. “I’m glad you’re here. Sorry about the other night, leaving so suddenly. I got a call from someone who fell and thought they were hurt. Turned out to be nothing.”
“I’m glad everything’s all right. Someone close to you?”
“Yeah. He’s a sweet old man, doesn’t really have anyone else to help him…”
She hated to be less than honest, but what else could she say? Maybe Seth was interested in her. Or the idea of her. Sure, he flirted with her, but if he really knew how inexperienced she was, he’d laugh. Or feel sorry for her. She hadn’t forgotten the pity on his face the day he’d first asked her out. Telling him the whole sad story about her father and his disease would only make that worse. She’d rather not put him in the position of making him stammer pointless platitudes. They changed nothing.
“Well, that just proves you’re the angel I’m always calling you.” He turned a heartthrob smile her way.
Heavenly felt half a second from swooning. “You’re funny. And you’re sweet.”
“Sweet? That’s something I haven’t been called in a long time.” He winked. “You need a ride home?”
“No!” She bit out, then dialed back the panic. Since he always looked like he was determined to figure her out, Heavenly had to get it together or he would know something was off. “I need to hit the grocery store to grab a few things for dinner.”
And she would…if she had the money. Looked like she and Dad would be eating ramen again tonight.
“I saw one right around the corner. How about if I take you?”
If he dropped her off, that would be great. It was a couple of blocks closer to the bus stop, which meant less time on her feet. “Sure.”
Wrapping an arm around her waist, he led her to the passenger door and helped her inside with an exaggerated sweep of his hand. “Your chariot, my lady.”
She giggled. Yes, she probably sounded silly, but he made her feel like a star-struck girl. “Thanks.”
As Seth closed her door, she glanced through the windshield and inside the lobby. Dr. Beckman still stood, staring. He looked something. Sad? Troubled? Upset?
No. He was mad.
Deciding she probably shouldn’t invade his personal space or kiss him again, she sent him an apologetic smile.
On his way around the vehicle, Seth raised a hand toward the doctor. He must have waved; she couldn’t see for sure. She only knew that when Seth stepped into the car, his grin was even wider.
“Good day?” she asked as he started the engine.
“It is now.” He dropped his hand to her knee. “I’ve been thinking about you.”
Heavenly’s breath caught. She’d heard the cliché about butterflies in her stomach, but she seriously had them. He’d actually thought about her? And he was touching her, too. Her whole thigh sizzled as if he’d heated her up with his rough, hot hands. Breathing wasn’t easy, either.
Oh, mercy…
When they’d first met, she had thought Seth so blindingly gorgeous. But when he’d used that voice on her at Raine’s party? She’d melted. Now, she had no doubt what he was thinking when he ate her up with his gaze. There was no nighttime to shroud them, no champagne to sway her. Just the two of them in broad daylight, in public, sober as church mice.
And she still couldn’t drag her stare from him.
Her breath caught when his fingers tightened on her leg. “I’ve been thinking about you, too.”
“Yeah? All good things, I hope.”
“Yes.” Sexy things. Totally new and different things. Exciting things. “But I’m sure you hear that a lot.”
“I’d rather hear it from you.” He squeezed her knee again, then put the car in drive and headed for the street. “What did you think of our conversation the other night? I was really honest with you.”
She swallowed. “I…liked it. A lot.”
“Any part in particular?”
Heavenly turned to find his mouth curled up in a playful grin. His long fingers tightened on the steering wheel as he turned onto the road when the traffic parted. His shoulders and chest filled out his black T-shirt. She could see the ridges of his abs through the soft cotton and…yes, their conversation excited him, too, if the huge bulge in his well-worn jeans was any indication.
Oh, gosh… She swallowed. “I liked all of it.”
“That’s what I wanted to hear, angel.”
“I’ve never met anyone who could make me feel what you did with a few words.”
He braked at the stoplight and glanced at her, his smile a seduction. “I’d like to do more than talk to you, Heavenly. How would you feel about that?”
His husky words hit her in the chest, then dropped between her legs, where they tightened and burned. “Happy. Um…excited.”
“Yeah?” He pulled into the parking lot of the grocery store and dropped his hand to her leg again, higher on her thigh. “How excited? Enough to make you wet?”
“Yes. Even enough to make me”—she bit her lip—“touch myself.”
He braked in the middle of the row and crooked a finger under her chin, lifting it. His green eyes had gone dark. “Excellent. Do you have to study tonight?”
Was he asking her if she was free? “No more school until January fourteenth.”
“This day just keeps getting better.” He diverted his attention long enough to pull the car into an empty spot. “Then let’s get you into the store so you can grab your groceries. Unless you’d like to go out to dinner. I’d love to take you somewhere.”
Heavenly wished she could say yes. But duty—and reality—called. “I’d love to go out, but I’ve got to, um…get some stuff done around the house and look in on the older man who fell. I’m also exhausted after a long week of work and finals. I’m not sure I’d be great company right now.”
“How about a rain check?”
She felt a goofy smile spread across her face. “That would be great.”
“Tell me when you’re free, angel.”
“I’m starting a new waitressing job tomorrow night. But I’d love to see you in the afternoon.”
“Where are you working? I could hang out and keep you company.”
Heavenly tried not to flinch. “No place you’d want to go. Loud, crazy restaurant with unruly brats. Besides, I’d die if you saw me in that ridiculous getup.”
“I’m sure you’ll look adorable, but I won’t make your job harder. How about if I call you in the morning and we make plans?”
“Perfect.” She had to be beaming—and she didn’t care. She was going on a second date with Seth Cooper, whose charm and swagger made her flutter and tingle. “Thanks for the ride here. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
As she reached for the handle of the door, Seth wrapped his fingers around her arm. “How about some company while you shop?”
Heavenly froze. What could she possibly buy without breaking the bank except a few more packages of ramen? Maybe eggs and some generic oatmeal. But that wouldn’t look like dinner to Seth.
“You don’t have to. I’m sure you have better things to do with your time.”
“I came to be with you. Why don’t you let me keep you company? Hell, I’ll even push the cart.”
How could she say no to that? Impossible, so she’d just have to grab a few things, make excuses, and scurry home. “Sure. Thanks.”
With numb fingers, she pushed her way out of the vehicle and stood. Instantly, her feet protested. At least her sandals were more comfortable than her work shoes. But it still seemed crazy that she was wearing flip-flops days before Christmas.
Suddenly, Seth was beside her, locking the car with the fob in one hand and tangling their fingers together with the other. She looked down at their clasped hands, then up to his confident grin. For a moment, she could almost pretend she was like any woman spending time with a guy who liked her, free to see where the attraction led them…
She really liked the feeling.
Inside the store, Seth grabbed a cart. Grocery shopping with him felt weirdly domestic. She’d done this chore alone for so long, usually clutching the store’s flyer and a handful of coupons. In fact, she almost never came here because the prices were higher, so she didn’t know where anything was. Maybe if she kept him talking he wouldn’t realize she was lost.
“So…when are you going back to New York for the holidays?”
He shrugged. “I’m actually thinking about staying.”
Could that possibly have anything to do with her?
Don’t be ridiculous…
“Well, you can’t beat the weather,” she remarked.
He slid his arm around her, anchoring it on her hip. “I can’t beat the company, either.”
Heavenly floated up the first aisle. “There you go, flirting again.”
“With you? Always.”
Their conversations were easy—unlike her intense exchanges with Dr. Beckman. And sometimes, she got the feeling the brilliant surgeon was saying one thing to her but meant something else entirely. He fascinated her…and she didn’t know what to do about the potent, one-sided attraction.
“Have you talked to Raine since the party?” Heavenly asked.
“I had breakfast with the three of them this morning. She’s doing great.”
Heavenly was relieved but not surprised. After all, sassy Raine lived with two loving men. Come to think of it, a similar relationship might solve her own problems. Then she’d never have to choose between the two men who flipped all her switches. She could wake up beside them every morning with smiles and kisses, spoil them rotten all day, then crawl into bed with them each night and crook her finger when she wanted them to touch her…
It was official; she’d lost her mind.
“I’m glad to hear it. She’s so kind and strong and funny.” And secure—both in herself and her place in her men’s lives. Raine was someone Heavenly aspired to be like. “I think she’s great.”
“It’s mutual. So, when you figured out they’re a threesome, how much did it shock you?”
“A lot,” she admitted. “I’ve never seen anything like that. Have you?”
He shrugged. “Ménage relationships? Sure.”
“Oh. Of course. You’ve been a cop.”
“Something like that.”
Mischief danced in his vivid eyes. He wasn’t telling her something, but the secret obviously made him smile. Gosh, she’d love to know the thoughts running through his head now.
“What does that mean?”
Seth laughed. “We’ve been up and down half the aisles in this store. You still haven’t put anything in your cart, angel.”
He was right. Goodness, she must look like a stumbling goofball. “Oops. I got distracted.”
Her blushing admission only made him laugh more. “How about if I help you out?”
Before she could answer, he tossed a bag of pasta in the cart, then a couple of jars of sauce. She gaped at the splurges she hadn’t been able to afford in years. But he was already tugging the cart around the corner, balancing it on two wheels, and heading for the produce.
“What are you doing?”
“Grabbing you some stuff for dinner.” He tossed a few peppers into the basket, followed by an onion, garlic, and some tomatoes. “Do you prefer parmesan, Romano, or a blend?”
“Um…” She couldn’t afford any of it. “I don’t—”
“Know? Care? How about I surprise you?” He pushed the cart to the specialty cheeses, picked up a few containers of grated stuff that nearly choked her with the price, then tossed them in the cart. “That’s the thing about growing up in New York. I know lots of Italians. They showed me the good stuff. You’ll love this.”
She’d probably melt the instant it hit her taste buds. Cheese was a weakness. Hazard of growing up in Wisconsin. But those few sprinkles almost cost more than she spent on groceries in a week.
How could she tell him she couldn’t buy any of this stuff without the evening becoming utterly mortifying?
“And you’ll need some of this…” He zipped farther across the store, to the meat counter, bypassing anything on sale. He picked up a few packages, then discarded them until he found the biggest slab of beef in the case. “Perfect. You like meat, right? You’re not one of those vegan girls who will only eat something if it never had two eyes and a mother?”
“No. I’m not. But I—”
“Great. Know what to make with everything in the cart?”
Heavenly had no clue. “I don’t.”
“Garlic steak pasta is magic.” He grinned as he scanned the basket. “Do you need anything else while you’re here?”
Staples she couldn’t afford for a month if she bought all this. “Um…I’ll never be able to eat this much food. And since I don’t know how to cook the dish you’re talking about, I think I should stick with the basics.”
When she reached into the basket to pluck things out, he pulled her closer and pushed the cart to the front of the store. “Angel, since you won’t let me take you out, I want to cook for you. All you have to do is invite me over and show me to your kitchen. I’ll do everything else. And after dinner…we’ll see if you feel like acting on some of that conversation we had. What do you say?”
Her first thought was a knee-jerk no. But she was really tempted to say yes. She didn’t want her time with Seth to end. Still, if she invited him over, she’d have to explain her situation, her father’s health, her complicated life—all the things she’d been avoiding.
Would it matter to him? Maybe not. He seemed determined to get to know her. Or get her into bed. Maybe…she should let him. She was hopelessly attracted to him, and sex would probably be the most amazing thing ever. And she wasn’t hanging on to her virginity for any particular reason. When it happened, she just wanted to be with someone who would treat her well and make her feel good. Seth would. Sure, some silly part of her wanted her first time to be special, but she wasn’t sixteen anymore, hoping to be plucked by the prom king on a bed of roses. She wanted it to mean something, but she wasn’t ready for happily ever after. Being happy for a moment would be okay…
As he maneuvered the cart into a checkout lane, she stood on tiptoe and whispered in his ear. “I don’t need a lot but…is this anything more than sex?”
He reared back and stared, a furrow between his brows. “Oh, angel. I’m dying to make love to you, but I’m interested in more than your beautiful body. You have a beautiful heart, too. If I didn’t like spending time with you, I wouldn’t be trying this hard.”
Right. Because he didn’t have to. That was enough for her. He only had to like her some. When they got back to her place, she’d figure out what to say to him…and how to explain him to her father.
She was being impulsive. After all, she and Seth had only been on one date. They’d seen each other a handful of times. Trusting someone with all her baggage was a big step. A scary one. She’d never done it and she hoped he didn’t scurry off once he got an eyeful of her reality. But just once, she wanted to live in the moment. And the truth was, if she kept waiting to start her life, she’d never experience anything.
Finally, the woman bagged the groceries. Seth paid, and it shocked her to think he hadn’t blinked at spending nearly fifty bucks for a single meal. But he grabbed the bags and dropped them into the cart, then put a hand at the small of her back and hustled her to the door.
Before they went any further, though, she needed to make a couple of things clear. Heavenly pulled on his sleeve. “Wait.”
“What’s wrong? Don’t change your mind now, angel…”
“I’m not,” she murmured as people bustled in and out of the store around them. “I need to be honest with you about something. Well, two things. First, we may not be able to have sex tonight. You’ll see why when we get to my place. But I want you to know it’s not because I don’t want to. I really do.”
“Hey, I’m not in a hurry. I don’t want you to feel rushed. Is it your first time?”
She winced. “Is it that obvious?”
“Only because I’m so fascinated by you that I watch every move.” He smiled and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “We have time. It will happen when it happens. I can be patient. I just want to be with you.”
Heavenly let out a sigh of relief. “Thank you. That means a lot to me. Since I’ve never done this—dated or hooked up or whatever we’re doing—I don’t know if I’m saying this wrong. Or if I should say anything at all.” She sucked in a deep breath. “The thing is, I like you. You make me laugh and you make me feel special. I’ve needed that for a long time. But it seems only fair for me to be honest. I like Dr. Beckman very much, too.”
She bit her lip and waited for his reaction. His face remained carefully blank.
“You said he was your friend.” He didn’t sound pleased.
Should she have kept her mouth shut? But how would that be fair to Seth? If he was going to navigate around all the difficulties in her life, he had a right to know that she had feelings she couldn’t seem to help for someone else.
“He is, but I like him as a man. I’ve thought of him…as a lover.”
Seth jerked and sucked in a breath as if she’d punched him in the stomach. “That’s honest.”
Heavenly grimaced. “Was I not supposed to be?”
“No. You absolutely were.” He gave her a sharp nod. The air between them turned brittle. “On second thought, I should go. Do you need a ride home?”
What? Panic screamed that she’d screwed up. Seth hadn’t wanted honesty, just a quick tumble. She sighed. Why was trying to be with a man she liked so complicated?
“I can take the bus, but… Don’t leave. I didn’t mean to upset you. I’m sorry.”
He pulled his keys from his pocket. “Maybe this is for the best.”
As much as she hated it, maybe he was right. It wasn’t fair to expect Seth to want her when she also wanted Dr. Beckman so much. “Please don’t be angry.”
Seth shrugged like it was no big deal, but she knew better. “I’m the one who came on strong. My apologies.” He tossed his keys in the air and they landed in his palm. “Enjoy your dinner.”
He didn’t kiss her or touch her. Heck, he barely looked at her as he turned, headed for his rental with that long-legged stride, and disappeared. She already knew she wouldn’t see him tomorrow for that date they’d planned. In fact, she wondered if this was the last time she’d ever see him.
Gosh, even that thought hurt.
Fighting tears, she grabbed the grocery sacks and huddled against a sudden chill as she made her way to the bus stop.
Thirty minutes later, Liam drawled a question that instantly got Seth’s back up. “So that’s it? A little competition made you decide to piss off back to New York?”
On the trio’s sun-soaked patio, Seth pushed away from the table and stood so abruptly the iron chair clattered to the flagstone. Was the big Irish bastard listening to a word he said? He’d wasted ten damn minutes explaining what had happened between himself and Heavenly and why he should leave LA. He wasn’t jealous of her feelings for Beck; he simply had no reason to stay.
Liam had a very different opinion.
Seth ran his stiff fingers through his hair in frustration. Coming here after leaving Heavenly at the grocery store to spill his guts to his old friend had clearly been a mistake.
On his way, he’d stopped at the club to pick up his bag. When he’d arrived at the trio’s house, he’d found Liam alone. He was sorry to have missed Hammer and Raine, but he was ready to get the hell out of this sunshine-laden, earthquake-riddled shithole. Familiarity, sanity, work, family during a white Christmas—that’s what he needed. Not doe-eyed blondes torqueing him up and turning him inside out.
“I’m taking the red-eye home tonight.”
Liam shook his head. “You realize if you go home now, mate, you’ll be leaving the door wide open for Beck to sweep in and claim Heavenly for himself.”
“Yeah.” Impossible to miss that part. But by her own admission, she wanted Beck as a lover.
Fuck, hearing that she had feelings for the shitsack stung. The fact he even cared pissed him off more. After all the things he’d whispered to her at Raine’s party… He bristled. Had she used his words to get herself hot for that fucking sadist?
Liam still sat, peering up at him with a considering expression. Christ, the guy was doing that quiet thing again, like his clairvoyant mother. That worried Seth.
“And what about the girl?” Liam demanded. “What about what she needs?”
“Well, I guess Beck will give it to her.” That made him want to punch the doctor stupid.
“I’m sure he’ll try. But I’ve seen you with Heavenly. Like I said, I think you belong with her.”
“I thought so, too, but apparently not. I’m done letting a woman who fucking wants someone else yank my chain.”
He dragged in a breath to find calm. The nagging pain in his chest made that impossible.
“Didn’t you learn anything from watching what Hammer and I went through with Raine? You and Beck don’t need to brawl. And you don’t need to reinvent the wheel. You both saw firsthand how it was made. Macen and I will even tell you how to drive the bus.”
Liam had lost his mind.
“Ménage is totally out of the question.”
The man’s skeptical brow and patience-of-Job sigh grated on Seth’s last nerve. “Because?”
“Don’t play dumb. Heavenly is nothing like Raine. Your girl finished growing up in a BDSM club. She knew exactly what to expect. Heavenly might be a grown-ass woman, but she’s naive and unworldly and… She’s Bambi, for fuck’s sake.”
“Why is that a problem?”
“I already told you. Heavenly. Is. A. Virgin.”
“All you and Beck have to do when you take her together is be gentle. The real problem is you two wankers. Figure your shit out and find out what she wants. What she needs. The answers might surprise you both.”
Liam’s lilting voice usually soothed him. Tonight, the tone irritated him like fingernails on a blackboard.
“That threesome you and I had was enough to scratch any itch I might have had for ménage. Besides, you know I don’t take on subs for more than a night or two. I’m not even sure why I’ve been lingering here. And I refuse to share air—much less a woman—with that snarky sadist. The two of us helping you and Hammer with Raine was one thing. That came easily.”
“My point exactly.”
What point was that? “But Heavenly? Not happening. In case you’ve missed the obvious, Beck and I fucking hate each other.” With every word he spewed, Seth felt his blood pressure shooting through the roof. Liam was one of his closest friends. Hell, like a brother. So why wasn’t he listening—or at least trying to understand? “You and Hammer worked it out because you had ten years of friendship and shared history to fall back on. Beck and I? Nothing but mutual loathing.”
“You say that now, but it’s amazing how close two men can become when someone they care about more than themselves needs what they both have to give her.” The almost patronizing smirk on the man’s face made Seth itch to slap it off. “Despite what Raine went through with her father, surely you’ve seen she’s much happier now.”
No denying that, but… “Not everyone is built for your kind of domestic bliss. Besides, I just wanted to fuck Heavenly, not get involved with her.”
Liam’s mocking smile widened. “You’re a liar… You were far more interested in Heavenly than you’ve been in anyone since—”
“Don’t go there. It doesn’t matter. Besides, Heavenly isn’t into BDSM. She probably doesn’t even know what it is.”
“I’m confident you gentlemen are capable of showing her the ropes, so to speak.” Liam smirked. “And Raine will be around for advice if or when Heavenly needs it.”
The tone and inflection of his words—even and deliberate, as though they spoke of nothing more mundane than the weather—only made Seth angrier.
“You’re not listening to me, goddamn it!”
“I’ve heard every word you said,” Liam assured.
Seth was done. He’d helped Liam when his friend had asked. Now that the Irishman had his life in order, Seth was out of here. He’d been hanging around for one reason, and she didn’t want him. She wanted the wolf in sheep’s clothing. Fine. Fuck it.
He was gone.
But Liam kept on yapping, like he was the guru with all the answers. “Now you listen to me. Get your shit together. You and Beck can both teach her as your relationship grows. The first thing you two have to do is figure out how to get on the same page. That can be tough. Believe me, I know. But it’s got to happen—”
“Like fuck it does. I don’t want to slap balls with Beck. And I won’t let Heavenly twist me up anymore.”
Finally, Liam’s dark eyes gleamed with some empathy. “You’re hurt and mad because she means something to you and you want to be enough for her. But you may have to accept that she needs you both.”
Never in a million fucking years. “You know how to reach me if something else comes up or you want to shoot the shit, but that woman won’t be leading me around by the dick anymore.”
Now the big man stood, advancing until they were toe to toe. Good, Seth was itching for a fight. He dragged in a breath and rolled his shoulders. He was mad at himself—and at the world in general. If Liam pushed him one more time, Seth would happily plant his fist in the man’s pretty pearly whites.
“Let me get this straight…” Liam’s voice dropped to an incredulous growl. “That woman you’re accusing of intentionally leading you around by your cock is…how did you put it? Naive and unworldly. Yet she has enough wiles to manipulate an experienced Dominant like you? Please. I’ve watched you maneuver cunning subs for years and come out unscathed. So how in the ever-loving hell could a little virgin possibly wrap you around her finger? Is she an innocent babe or a manipulative bitch? You can’t have it both ways.”
“You don’t get it,” Seth growled back.
“Oh, I understand completely. The part I’m stuck on is why you’d blame her for your shit. When she gave you her honesty, you tucked your tail and ran. After all you’ve been through, I never thought you’d give up on someone you obviously have feelings for. If you ever want to be happy, I suggest getting over yourself, shelving your ego, and most of all, making peace with your past.”
That was a low blow. “Back the fuck off, Liam. I mean it.”
“Oh, I see. You expected me to empathize with poor you. You wanted me to pity your dilemma and validate your feelings.” He scoffed. “How about you grow a pair instead? When I called a few weeks ago to tell you about my troubles with Raine, isn’t that what you told me?”
Yeah, he had. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”
“On the contrary. I’m saddened that the man I’ve always respected is behaving like a coward. You’re scared shitless to admit you want Heavenly in your life. That’s the biggest problem of all.”
Red mist hazed his sight. It annoyed him even more that Liam wasn’t wrong. One more word and they’d come to blows. “Fuck you and fuck this bullshit. You don’t know—”
“Of course I do. I was there, remember?” Silence enveloped both men for a heartbeat. “I know exactly what happened, why you’re the man—and the Dominant—you are now. Isn’t it time you stopped—”
“Isn’t it time you stopped tossing my tough love back in my face?”
“You didn’t die that day. Why don’t you start embracing the fact you’re still alive?”
But Seth had heard more than enough. He shoved Liam back hard enough to send him crashing against the table. Without another word, he turned his back and headed for the front door.
Liam still managed to cut him with his parting shot. “Nothing that happened was your fault, Seth. You’re wasting your second chance. Wake up and realize that before it’s too late.”