PREFACE

Let me explain The Book Store Rule to you. The Book Store Rule is an ideology that two of my friends and I were discussing in detail while standing inside a bookstore—thus, its name.

The ideology is this: If a person is not married or officially engaged to be married, they are single. Therefore, they are free to date and/or hang out with other consenting single people at their leisure.

Now, there are some sub-rules to The Book Store Rule. Rule number one is there must be honesty. You cannot deceive a person by giving them the implication you are in a monogamous relationship with them while “secretly” seeing other people. If you have made someone believe they are the only person you are dating and you then decide to date someone else in addition, you must make the first person aware of your change of mind. It is then up to the first person to either stay and roll with the new conditions of the relationship or opt to leave the situation altogether. The person who has decided to see other people has done nothing wrong as long as he/she is honest about their change of mind.

Rule number two is The Book Store Rule cannot be forced on anyone. If a person you are interested in dating tells you they are in an exclusive relationship with someone, even though they are technically single, you must respect that person’s decision to remain monogamous. This person has made a decision to walk their relationship through, which is probably on the road to marriage.

The ideology of The Book Store Rule is actually based on theology. You see, the Bible, the true Book of Life, offers no instances of a boyfriend/girlfriend, significant other type of relationships. Nobody in the Bible has a boo, with the exception of maybe Solomon, who had over one-thousand boos. But Solomon, I believe, was open and honest about the number of relationships he had. And check out the whole story to see how that turned out.

Single means single; married or engaged means monogamous. He is only your man or she is only your woman if he or she is your husband or wife. Therefore, a person you are not married or engaged to cannot cheat on you if they make the decision to see someone else. They may be a liar, a schemer, or a duplicitous person, but the term cheater should be subjected only to those who are married or engaged.

The Book Store Rule is essentially designed to protect the person who is interested in dating a person who is unmarried or unengaged but may be dating someone else. The interested person in this case has done nothing wrong.

The Book Store Rule is also designed to restore the rapidly deteriorating value of the God-created institution of marriage. “Couples” who are living together, or have decided to pro-create without the benefit of marriage have totally devalued the family as God intended it to be. The Book Store Rule is not intended to be a license to become a player. It is created to give people a reason to put true stock in what God wants from us, not to belittle it or cheapen it with frivolous, unconsecrated relationships.

Hopefully the stories of a married couple, an engaged couple, a couple in a long distance relationship, and a few folks who care and don’t care about these couples’ relationship status will help you rediscover where a true relationship begins. It starts with a proposal of a lifelong commitment for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health, till death do you part.