If Sayer was surprised to see Bear on his front porch, he hid it well.
His brother wore an expression as blank as stone, the same expression he’d worn the last year he’d worked with them on the Fall West. Like he was already mentally checking out from them.
It irritated the hell out of Bear, so he immediately snapped, “You’re helping her” instead of being cordial. Or even neutral.
“Her?” Sayer’s eyebrows rose. “I’m guessing you mean my new neighbors. Which her are you talking about?”
Bear shoved past him into the house, the first time he’d ever been inside. Her. As if there was any question. Never had been, at least not for him. “Filippa with an F.”
“Ah.” Sayer shut the door. Bear supposed that was progress, that his brother wasn’t immediately tossing him out. “That one. She seems like she’d irritate you.”
“She does.” Bear pointed to a chair by the window. “That’s Mom’s old rocker.” She’d sat with each of them in that chair, reading them stories at bedtime. Bear and Thorne had each taken a side when they’d been little.
“She let me have it.”
Bear sat down in it. “That house is going to fall down. And I don’t want Pippa in it when it does.”
Sayer kept standing. “You want the land for your new processing plant.”
“Want? We already paid for it.”
“Sometimes you sound just like Thorne.” Sayer raised a brow. “And Thorne’s a bully.”
Bear looked away. “He’s our brother.” And my twin.
He didn’t believe in any mystical twin-bond bullshit, but to claim that he had the same relationship with Sayer he did with Thorne would be wrong. His relationship with Thorne was just different, and there was no denying it.
Sayer looked like them—dark hair, brown eyes, sharp nose, lines around his eyes and in his forehead—but looking at Sayer didn’t feel like he was staring at a copy of himself. Although Sayer looked pretty good for being cut off from his family. Like the rift wasn’t keeping him up at night.
“Still a bully.” Sayer leaned against the wall. “You just come here to chat?”
“She told me you’d be helping them. And then I saw the toolshed today—you paint nice—and realized you’d been there recently.”
He didn’t know why he wasn’t just getting to the point with Sayer. Maybe he was simply hungry to hear what his brother had been up to and the Crivellis provided a decent opening.
Sayer watched him for a moment. “What were you doing there today?”
“Helping her milk.” That moment had almost been more intimate than kissing her. His hand on her back, the two of them breathing together… Her curls had brushed the back of his hand. He felt them still, so soft.
Sayer reached forward, pulled something off Bear’s shirt. A single hair, twining into a perfect curl. Pippa’s hair. “I see.”
Bear stared at the strand in Sayer’s hand. If his brother hadn’t taken off and not spoken to any of them in over a year, he could have admitted everything. Holding it all in was driving him more than a little crazy. But although he loved Sayer and wanted him to come home, he didn’t one hundred percent trust him.
Guess he and Thorne were alike in that way.
He looked his brother straight in the eye. “We need that land. We’re losing money too fast—the ranch could fail. You’re still part of it. You should still care. And this lawsuit…” He shook his head. “It won’t get resolved in time.”
Sayer walked slowly to the couch and lowered himself. He linked his hands between his spread knees. “I’m really sorry, and I don’t want the ranch to fail—honestly—but I’m not going to do anything to hurt those women.”
Bear reared back. “I wouldn’t either.” God, just the thought… His chest ached like his sternum had been cracked. “I’m not…”
He stopped, because while he said he wouldn’t hurt them, he kind of had. When he’d first gone over there, he’d meant to smoke them out. To drive Pippa and Lulu from the only place they had. And really, that was still his goal even if he wasn’t so direct about it anymore. If Pippa left that house, he’d breathe a huge sigh of relief. If the ranch could finally get that land, he’d breathe another huge sigh of relief.
“They won’t get hurt,” Bear said. “That’s not what I came here about.”
“Really?” Sayer raised an eyebrow. “Because I’m surprised Thorne hasn’t had the sheriff throw them out on their asses.”
Bear worked his jaw. “We talked him out of that. But there’s a way you can help.”
“Huh.”
It wasn’t an encouraging noise, but Bear went on. “You let us use those twenty acres that front the road. We build the processing plant on the current property line between your place and the ranch; we build a proper road out to the main highway for the shipping trucks. We’d have to build new holding lots and chutes over there, but it can be done. It’s a way to save the ranch and… and…”
Here came the thing Bear was really afraid to say, the true heart of his plan. Sayer rejecting this would hurt almost as bad as when he first left.
“And you can rejoin the family and the ranch,” Bear finished. “Like you’re meant to. All three of us running things and the new plant coming about through all our efforts.”
The current plans would have to be changed of course, and there’d have to be new surveys and blueprints drawn up and more costs, but they could finally move forward on the next phase of the ranch. And they could finally be a family again.
It all made so much sense in Bear’s head—Sayer had to see it too. So why was Bear’s heart beating too fast? Why were his palms clammy?
Sayer said nothing for long moments, his expression a mask. Bear had the sensation of his brother moving farther and farther away with each heartbeat, slipping away out of reach even though he was stock-still on the couch.
“Why isn’t Thorne here?”
It took Bear a second to process the question. “Thorne doesn’t even know about this. It’s my idea.”
Sayer snapped up, shaking his head. “Nope. Nope, he needs to get his ass over here and tell me to my face he needs my help. I’m not doing shit for him until that happens.”
Christ, that went south fast. Bear rose too, held up his hands.
“Are you sure Thorne didn’t send you?”
As if Bear was his twin’s errand boy. “No, he didn’t,” Bear bit off. “We’re not exactly on great terms at the moment.”
That caught Sayer flat-footed. He went utterly still, wide-eyed. “Even you? He’s further gone than I thought.”
“We’ll work through it.” Although as each day went by without them clearing the air, Bear had begun to wonder. Didn’t this tension feel as wrong to Thorne as it did to Bear? Apparently not.
Sayer planted a fist on his hip. “What’d you fight about?”
“Not about cattle breeding,” Bear said dryly.
His brother clenched his jaw. “It was about more than that, and you know it.”
“Right. It was about how you think you should be in charge and never being able to back down from a fight with Thorne. Your cattle were just the excuse.”
“Thorne puts everything he has into that ranch, but that means there’s nothing of him outside of it.” Sayer’s jaw had relaxed, but the rest of him was still tense. “He can’t see anything past his own nose, he’s so caught up in how he thinks things should be. I wanted something for myself, something outside of that, and Thorne lashed out. Because he can’t understand. And he never will.”
Christ, Bear didn’t think he’d ever heard anyone cut down to the heart of Thorne so quick, so deep. “You don’t know that. People can change.”
He didn’t know if he really believed that or if he was defending his twin out of instinct.
Sayer leaned forward. “I know you want something for yourself too. You’re not like him—you’ve got more in you than just doing the same thing Mom and Dad did, never changing anything.”
“I do,” Bear said intently. “Which is why I’m here with this plan.” Was Sayer finally about to pull his head out of his ass and seriously consider it?
“So why did you and Thorne fight then? You never answered.”
Nope. Sayer was continuing with the pigheadedness. Bear’s shoulders slumped. “About Pippa. I wouldn’t stop checking on her.”
Sayer’s mouth made a perfect O as he whistled silently. “That bad, huh?”
Was it bad? It was more like Bear felt better in Pippa’s company than anywhere else or with anyone else.
He wanted to kiss her again. And more. That might be bad. But again, in the moment, it’d be a slice of heaven. Or maybe the whole damn cake.
“She thinks Esme abandoned her goats.” He rubbed a hand over his face, feeling more raw than he could remember being for a long time. “Pippa’s determined not to let those goats down, not like Esme did. She doesn’t even know the first thing about goats.” He released a short laugh. “She loves a cat who doesn’t love her back. She loves her sister even more.”
Sayer smiled wryly. “She put the chicks in the coop just so they could play in it. Then put them back. So I get it.”
Bear dropped his hand. “Do you see now why I need you to agree to this? To share the land?” He leaned forward, put all his urgency into his voice, his stance. “It would fix everything.”
“Maybe.”
Such a little word, but Bear seized on it. Finally he’d repair this entire situation. Sayer would come home where he belonged, they’d build the plant, and somehow he’d get Pippa into better housing. Finally.
“But I can’t agree without some conditions.” Sayer’s face went blank. Again. “Thorne needs to get over here, not you. I want to hear it from him, that’s he’s sorry. Because if he keeps on going like he has, it’ll never work. He’ll wear me down to nothing, just like he’s doing to himself. And to you. No matter how much land I give you or what compromises you offer, he’ll just keep going on as he has, unless he stops. He needs to recognize he was wrong.”
Bear felt like he’d been turned to lead, his limbs too heavy to move. He’d tried and he’d failed. Everything was just as ruined as before. “You’re responsible for this rift too.” But he went for the door because he knew that wouldn’t make a dent in Sayer’s anger.
“Yeah, and who’s responsible in your fight with him?” Sayer threw after him. “No matter what, Thorne will never say sorry. And he’s going to drive everyone away because of it. Hell, half the town isn’t on speaking terms with him already! When are you going to cut him out? He’s threatening the survival of the ranch, not those Crivelli sisters.”
“I don’t turn my back on my family.” Bear threw open the door, glad when it banged against the wall. He hoped it left a mark. “You left. You. None of the rest of us.”
“Fine, you all keep living under his thumb.”
“And you weren’t a bossy asshole because you’re the oldest?” That was pretty rich coming from Sayer, who’d used his age—and his fists sometimes, when they were young—to enforce his own will.
“You can go now.” Sayer pointed to the door. “Get Thorne over here, or you’re not getting that land. And honestly, I do kind of hope the Crivellis win back that land and stay there forever. They’re good neighbors. Better than some.”
Meaning better than Thorne. And maybe even better than Bear too.
Bear slammed the door shut behind him, letting that be his final word. He didn’t know why he’d even bothered—Sayer was as pigheaded as ever. Stupid, dumb hope of his to think Sayer would ever agree to any plan. He was only interested in screwing over the family. Just like when he built this house right where they’d have to see it every day, a stark reminder that Sayer had cut himself off from the rest of them.
Bear hadn’t been lying—he’d never turn his back on his family. He and Thorne might be mad at each other right now, but it wouldn’t be forever. They’d work it out. Tomorrow in fact—Bear would talk to Thorne, get them over this.
He wasn’t going to give up seeing Pippa, but he wasn’t choosing his family over her. No matter what his brothers said.