part0032

“I am.” She frowned. “I wish I had realized it sooner. I feel like I wasn’t a very good friend to you or to Wes, because I kept trying to push you two apart. But I only did it because I didn’t want either of you to get hurt. Now that I see how much you really care about each other—well, I just thought you should know.”

“I’m not sure what to say.” I picked up another piece of chocolate as my mind spun between panic and elation.

Maby knew Wes better than anyone else. If she thought he had feelings for me, if she thought that he meant what he’d written in the poem, then maybe it was true.

I remembered what he’d said to me in the hallway earlier that day. He said I would never have to be alone again. But I thought he meant as a friend.

There was one thing I knew now. I couldn’t continue much longer without knowing for sure.

“Maybe I should go talk to him.”

“I think you should.” Maby picked up her phone. “He told me was hanging out in the courtyard a little while ago. He might still be there.”

“Are you sure about this?” I frowned, even as my heartbeat quickened.

“I’ve known Wes for a long time. I’ve never seen him heartbroken over anyone. When he told me what happened to you today, I could have sworn he was ready to burst into tears.”

“Wes?” My eyes widened.

“Right?” She shook her head. “It shocked me too.”

“If he’s that upset then I definitely should talk to him.” I looked toward the door.

My original plan had been to stay holed up inside as long as possible. But if Wes was out there, hurting, I owed it to him at least to get everything straight between us.

I thought about the times I’d wondered if he wanted to kiss me. What if he had? What if each time I pulled away, he felt as torn up inside as I had when I walked away?

The thought drove me out of the dorm and into the courtyard.

Maybe he wouldn’t be there. Maybe he’d already gone back to his room. Maybe he wasn’t upset about me leaving but upset about something else.

With my heart in my throat I walked toward the fountain in the center of the courtyard. I could see him there, his head tilted down as he looked at his phone, his hair hanging forward hiding his eyes.

A shiver crept along my spine. How could he be so gorgeous? It shouldn’t be physically possible.

“Wes?” I murmured his name as I paused beside him.

“Fi!” He jumped to his feet and dropped his phone in the process. “Sorry, let me get that. Just a second.” He grabbed his phone, then straightened up and pushed his hair out of his eyes. “Are you okay?”

“I guess.” I shoved my hands in my pockets and shrugged.

“I was going to text this to you, but now I can show it to you myself.” He held his phone out to me. “I told you we’d figure something out.”

“What is this?” I took the phone from him and began to read over information about a scholarship.

“With your grades, I’m sure you’ll qualify. Mrs. Davis already said she’d write you a letter of recommendation.” He smiled. “So maybe you’ll be able to stay.”

“You talked to Mrs. Davis about me?” My heart pounded a little faster.

“Yes, she was concerned.” He pointed to the phone. “Isn’t it great? I can get you the paperwork so you can apply for it.”

“Wes, this is sweet, but I don’t think it’s going to work. These kinds of things take a long time to process and usually they have to be done for the beginning of the year.” I frowned. “I’ll look into it, though.”

“That’s all I’m asking.” He reached for his phone and his fingers collided with mine.

I felt a shower of sparks shimmer through me as I looked up at him. In that moment, I knew I had to know. I didn’t want to go one more day without finding out the truth.

“You told me that I could trust you, right?”

“Of course.” He shifted closer to me. “I know that I haven’t always given you good reason to—I mean, with the way I’ve acted. But I’ve told you things I’ve never told anyone else.”

“Have you told me everything that you wanted to tell me?” I searched his eyes. “Is there anything that you might be holding back?”

“I’m not sure what you mean.” He looked over at the fountain, then the ground. His cheeks reddened.

“Wes.” I narrowed my eyes, determined to get a straight answer. “The poem you wrote about me? ”

“Yeah?” He glanced back at me. “Is Maby telling you things about me again?” He frowned. “I can’t say that she’s wrong, but Fi, you know that’s not me, not who I really am. Don’t you?”

“Maby did tell me some things about you, yes.” My muscles tensed as I wondered if I could go through with finally asking him. “She told me that you might have meant everything that you wrote in that poem—that you might have meant it to mean something and not just be part of an assignment.”

“Oh.” He licked his lips as he took a slight step away from me. “And what did you say?”

“I said that it was just an assignment. That you couldn’t feel that way about me.” I grabbed his hand as he started to step back again. “Don’t, Wes. Not this time. I want the truth.”

“You mean you really had no idea?” He curled his fingers around mine and pulled me close to him. “You didn’t know that when we were at the carousel, I tried to kiss you? You didn’t know that night after the dance?”

“I didn’t,” I whispered. He’d pulled me so close to him that it seemed as if the rest of the world had disappeared. “Why didn’t you just tell me?”

“I did.” He touched my cheek with his free hand and looked into my eyes. “I wrote you a poem.”

“Wes.” I took a sharp breath as he continued to stare at me. “You’re serious?”

“I didn’t think you wanted anything to do with me.” He gave a short laugh. “Every time I got near you, you would find a way to get away. Not this time, though.” He leaned forward as he guided my head toward him.

For an instant I was caught up in his scent, in the warmth of his skin and the way his fingertips felt stroking my hair. Finally we would kiss. Finally when it was far too late.

“Wes, no.” I pulled away from him at the last second before I would finally feel his lips on mine.

“Fi!” He groaned and slid his arms around my waist. “Why?”

“Because it’s too late.” I couldn’t believe my own words as I spoke them, but I couldn’t stop them either. “Nothing can happen between us now. My life is a mess. What I need right now is a friend, someone that I can trust.”

“Then that’s what you’ll have.” He let his arms fall back to his sides. “Whatever you need, that’s what I’ll be.”