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I woke up really early again, even though I barely slept during the night. I called other people, but there was no sign of Márcio. I walked around the neighborhood, but didn't see him. Each day, I get more anguished, and when the nigh comes, all I think about is the homeless man's murder. In this post, I'm gonna write about how I found out my friend is gay. I'll try to do it in only one post.
During the last weekend, we were in a beach house celebrating summer break with our friends. We had done our college entrance exams already and were only waiting for the results.
In the house, there were only the closer friends, and even though we were few, I knew that weekend would be one the gratest in my life. At least, that was the plan.
The guys were very cool, we had spent many years in the same school. And you know... we're all young, spending a whole weekend in a house... all we wanted to do was drink, have a lot of fun, and if we were lucky, hook up with someone. Only Márcio was a bit weird that weekend, and didn't seem so excited for the moment.
To me, it was the perfect opportunity to declare for a girl who I liked since fifth grade, but I never had the courage to speak to, since that was my last chance of hooking up with her.
— What's up, Carlos? Now that school's over and there's a party tonight, will you finally have courage to tell Flávia that you like her and that you're very into hooking up with her? Maybe it's your last chance.
— Marcinho, I really don't know, dude. What if she's into somebody else? What if she isn't into me? I really don't wanna be dumped.
— You're so soft, Carlos, how will you know if you don't try? The maximum you can get is a no, and it doesn't hurt that much. I'm telling you by my own experience. It's much harder to deal with the end of a relayionship — he said while looking at the morning's clear blue sky.
— How do you know, if you were never in a relationship? — I asked.
— Let it go. The matter here is not if I know or not, is the fact that you're going to a fight already feeling like you've lost, even though it hasn't even began. You're still that little boy who only had the nerve to ask to play football after I pushed you to do it.
— Self esteem is not my best quality.
— But you need to trust yourself more. If you keep thinking like that, you'll never date a girl or do anything in your life. And believe me, the girls are the ones who should have these doubts about you, not the opposite.
— I know, you don't have to give me lessons.
— I'm not giving you a lesson, what I want is to show you that you need to trust yourself more. Come on, what girl wouldn't want to be with such good guy like you? And looking at the male options they've got here, you can be sure they can't be too picky — Márcio said, laughing.
— That's not how it works, Márcio. Speaking like that, it even seems easy, but... you're right, I'm doing it today!
— So make good use of your time now, because the girls just got here. Don't worry, I can tell her myself. — he said while getting up and opening the gate for the car to enter.
— Don't do that! Are you mad? Then I won't have any credibility with her. I don't wanna look like a wimpish.
The girl who I liked was Flávia. Wow, she was hot. An almost perfect girl, with a strong personality, but, at the same time, girly and full of attitude, what made me like her even more.
In school, she didn't hang with some random person, but she had a long line of boys trying to reach out for he. How many times didn't I suffer by watching her being with other people? Which got me convinced that she would never want to be with a boy like me.
— She's coming, Márcio. Do you really think I have a chance?
— You'll only know if you try, dude. Go speak to her.
Flávia had just gotten out of the car. She looked gorgeous with her hair in the wind, wearing jeans shorts and a white blouse.
— Hi, boys! — Flávia said to us.
— Hi, Flávia, how are you doing? — I asked her while shaking her hand.
— I don't know how this boy expects to hook up with someone by shaking a girl's hand like that. He's so smart, but when it comes to women... Come here, Flavinha, how was the trip? — Márcio asked while hugging her and kissing her cheek.
— I'm very good. — she said smiling — I didn't know you were coming, Márcio. Lúcia told me you wouldn't be here. I'm surprised to see you now.
— I really wasn't coming, I'm not in a party mood, but Carlos insisted so much that here I am.In this moment, Lúcia, another friend of ours, got out of the car with a guy we didn't know.
— Well, I'm here too, isn't anybody gonna give me a hug?
— Lúcia, without you, a party isn't a party! — I said while hugging her.
— This is Robson, a friend of mine, he had nothing to do, anyway, and I'm telling you he's in the mood for a hook up, I wanna see if it will happen here... I'm joking, he's a big friend, and I invited him, I hope you don't mind.
— Lúcia, in our party, there's always room for one more. Are you okay, dude? Welcome! — I said while shaking Robson's hand. He was brunet and very strong.
Oh, let me introduce Lúcia properly. She was a bit fat and short, and had curly hair. The whole gang loved her, she was someone who was never in a bad mood.
At first, I didn't know Robson, but, later, at the party, I'd know him better, and you'll undersatand why.
— Where's the rest of the people? — Lúcia asked.
— They're all still sleeping. Me and Carlos got here in the morning. We only had time to put our bags away and enjoy the sea a bit. They got here last night, and already threw a lil' party. The house is a mess, pretend you're not seeing it, Robson. — Márcio said.
— Oh, I can't believe I already missed a party — Lúcia said, excited.
In that moment, Guilherme came out of the house. He was a nice guy, but a bit arrogant and limitless, specially when he drank. Actually, he was an idiot, he just wanted to know about hooking up with women, lifting weights and spending money — his parents' money.
Their parents were owners of a group of well successful churches here in Pernambuco and they lived very well by saving people's souls. We were his friends only because he was expelled from most of the schools in Recife and was put in a one at the periphery, as his parents' punishment. Our school was the only one who put up with his troublemaker personality, so he continued there, and I don't know how, completed his studies with us.
—Welcome, babes, to my beach house. The party's going since yesterday, you've missed a lot, but the batteries are already loaded. We had a great time last night, I even swam naked in the pool, the chicks were all on me because of this daddy's body.
— Wow, I can imagine... They must've been crazy to go home, good for me I wasn't here.
— Don't worry, Flávia, I can repeat it only for you today.
— Don't bother, Guilherme, I don't want to see it, because I'll definetly be disappointed.
We all laughed.
— Oh, I want to! Take it off, take it off... — Lúcia said.
— Who knows, maybe we can swim together tonight, just like the couple from The Blue Lagoon. We could swim naked, close together.
We all laughed again.
— And who's that guy? — Guilherme asked about Robson.
— I'm Robson, Lúcia's friend, I’m crashing the party.
— I'm already telling you there are not many options, but there are some niggas who can do the job. Dude, you're gonna get the chick you want to, but, of course, after me. And later there's a surprise for us.
— Oh, Guilherme, come on, dude, you even seem like you haven't grown. Stop talking bullshit. Girls aren't an object for you to talk about them like that. And try to grow, 'cause if you don't, you'll end up without any of them, even the ones who can do the job, jerk. — Márcio said.
— What about you? You only wanna be Mr. Right. Who invited this jackass? — Guilherme asked.
— Ooh, let's stop this? We came here to have fun, not to fight. Enough!
— I spoke out loud
— Well, let's come in, I wanna wake the rest of the people up. — Flávia said
— Robson, don't mind Guilherme, he has no fault in being born such a jerk. The boys' bedrooms are to the left, come with me. And girls, you already know the way to your room from the other parties we've thrown here. — I guided the new guy through the house's rooms.
— My name's Márcio. So, are you excited for the party tonight? — my friend asked Robson.
— Very excited. The gang is cool, I came listening to many stories about you guys.
I already know everybody by what I've heard. I think it will be very fun.
We laughed.
— Oh, fuck, I forgot my phone in the car. Carlos, could you ask Lúcia for the key?— Robson asked me when we got to the room.
— Sure. I'll be back in a minute — I answered already leaving the room.
When I got closer to the girls' room, they were talking about who each one wanted to hook up with, or, at least, try to. I know it's not cool, but I couldn't resist it. I stood by the door in silence trying to listen.
— I think Márcio is the cutest! — Lúcia said.
— Oh, I think he's very sweet, a guy that must’ve got the moves and knows how to treat a woman at the H hour. I would do it easily if he wanted to. — Flávia said.
I was disappointed in the moment that I heard that. So the girl I wanted to be with so much was into my best friend. As always, I was on his shadow.
Márcio was always the one who the girls were into, he always had higher grades than me, was more popular in school and was the person who everybody liked to talk with. That made me very angry, and even a bit jealous, I confess.
— Okay, but we all know who has always been into you, Flávia. Carlos. He just doesn't have the courage, but his actions demonstrate that he really likes you. — My heart started beating faster at that moment.
— Oh, come on, Carlos is very sweet and cute, but the boy never had an attitude, since fifth grade. We already finished school and the maximum that he's ever said to me is that I'm pretty. In my opinion, I'd go with Márcio, I like men like him.
— I think Carlos' shyness is very sweet, he's definetly good in bed. Guys that are too shy like this, when in between four walls, lose it very easily, and definetly, do a woman good.
They laughed.
— Wow, you're so naughty, girl. Is he really like that? Does he really know how to do it at the H hour? But, still, Márcio fires me more, I don't know why.
— I don't know, Flávia, Márcio is cute and all, but I don't think he was ever into wanting to be with you or with any other girl from our gang. I've never seen him hooking up with any girl from our school, although I've heard some stories.
— Let's see what happens today, Lúcia. Isn't it weird that one of the prettiest boys in school was never with a girl indeed? He could choose any girl. I know he was always surrounded by those bitches, but, if he's done something, I think it was hidden. Very hidden.
— What do you mean with that? — Flávia asked, but, before Lúcia could answer, she continued: — Then, tonight, you'll see him hooking up with me. Just let us start drinking
— Just be careful so you don't get dumped by someone who doesn't want you and end up hurting someone who really does. — Lúcia said.
— Girls, could you talk lower? I wanna sleep. — Ana said.
— The party was rocking last night, wasn't it, Ana? For you to come sleep in our room, you must've been pretty high. — Flávia said.
— Hey, wait, who's snoring under the sheets? Shouldn't you be here by yourself, Ana
— Shhhhh! It's Rodrigo — Ana said, jumping out of bed.
— ANA! — Flávia and Lúcia said at the same time, surprised.
— Wait! Isn't Rodrigo dating Beatriz, who's in the other room? What is he doing in here? — Lúcia asked, astonished.
— Girls, it's a long story. Is Beatriz awake?
— No! — the girls answered, once again, at the same time.
— Then I need to throw him out as soon as possible. Help me, please! Rodrigo, wake up, you need to go to the boys' room.
— No, let me sleep just a bit more...
— No, Rodrigo, you need to leave, damn it. Go!
— Wait! — At that moment, I heard footsteps.
— Are you actually throwing water on his face? — Flávia said.
— Of course! — Lúcia affirmed
— Damn it! What the fuck? — Rodrigo screamed angrily.
— Now, piss off! — Ana said.
Rodrigo left wrapped in a sheet. He looked so bad that, when he passed by me, he didn't even realize I was spying the conversation.
— Wait, what do you mean? I didn't understand anything. Rodrigo's dating your best friend and slept with you? The party's must've been really good, there was even a menage à trois. Too bad I wasn't here.
— Not at all, Lúcia. I know he's dating my best friend, and that makes my conscience even heavier. It couldn't have happened, but he's in love with me, and I started liking him too. Yesterday, they had a discussion, and when I left the bathroom, he pulled me into this room. We were both high, we didn't even think about it, it just happened, but, please, don't say anything.
— But what about the boys? What if one of them knows and tell her? — Flávia asked, worridly.
— My God, I'm over — Ana said.
— Calm down! Let's pretend nothing happened and wait to see if Beatriz starts a discussion. Maybe the boys won't even tell, they're a bunch of bastards, anyway. They're always covering up each others' messes, I wish women were united like that! These are the moments I feel jealous about men. They might even be behind us, but they know how to make each others' lives simpler when it comes to women. — Lúcia said.
— I really hope you don't tell. — Flávia ended the subject.
Suddenly, I felt a touch on my back and saw Guilherme behind me.
— Spying on the naked chicks! — he said, out loud, already opening the door!
The girls looked at us surprised.
— That's not it. — I said madly. — I came here to get the car's key that Robson asked me.
— Yeah, sure, you naughty boy! — Guilherme said, making fun of me, while I was, probably, already red.
— Here it is, you naughty boy — Lúcia said, giving me the key and making everybody laugh.
Wow, that was embarassing.
I returned to the boys' room thinking about everything I'd heard. Wow, I couldn't believe Flávia wanted to hook up with Márcio. From all the boys in the house, did it have to be my best friend?!
Besides from us, in the house, there were a few more friends. Júnior, the weirdest in the class — I don't think his brain was ok, but he was a cool guy —, and Fernando, who didn't hook up with anyone — due to the fact that he was still in the "cartoons and video games" phase.
There were just a few people missing, who were working and would only get there at the time of the party. The boys that were sleeping started to wake up few by few. We were divided in rooms and Guilherme had a whole room for himself, but the house was big and there were about two empty rooms for whoever wanted some privacy — you know what I mean.
The rest of the day was chill. The girls cooked lunch and went to the pool: we, men, played soccer naked, only Robson was out of the game, but because he said he didn't have the swing needed, and was impressed by Márcio, who was the responsible for making our team win Guilherme's.
— Wow, you're such a good player! — Robson told Márcio.
— Not at all, these guys are so bad.
We all laughed, except for Guilherme, that doesn't know how to lose and always creates a discussion. We went back to the house starving and tired. But Guilherme, who likes to be the funny one, tricked us into one of his tricks. The pool was in front of the house, and we needed to pass by it everytime. Guilherme, without thinking, — at least, I hope so —, pushed Márcio in to the pool. At the moment, everybody laughed, including me. Therefore, Márcio came furious out of the water, 'cause he had his mobile on his pocket that he had just gotten from his parents as a gift.
— FUCK! — he screamed. — Your son of a bitch, I have my mobile here! — Márcio said while leaving the pool with his mobile, all wet, on his hand.
— Fuck, dude, I didn't mean it! — Guilherme said, smiling.
— "Didn't mean it", my ass. I know you did it on purpose just 'cause you've lost the game — Márcio said, already going to hit him.
Me and the boys held him and the girls started screaming asking them to stop.
— I can buy ten of this shitty mobile that you have. — Guilherme said.
— I hope you actually do it — Márcio said, letting go of our arms and entering the house.
— That guy is a jerk! — Guilherme said, looking at the girls.
— The only jerk that we're seeing here is you — Flávia answered.
Everybody calmed down and the rest of the afternoon was okay, until the so expected party.
Posted by Carlos at 10:36 pm.