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“Come in,” Carly called out when she heard a knock on her bedroom door. It had been two weeks since the afternoon she’d spent with Mick by the lake.
“Hey, you.” It was Charlotte. “Your mom let me in. How are you feeling?”
Carly was on her bed, propped up against some pillows that her mom had set up for her. She shrugged. “As good as it gets for now, I guess.”
Charlotte pulled up a desk chair and sat next to Carly’s bed. “You’re looking good.”
She knew she wasn’t looking her best, but she didn’t want to dismiss Charlotte. Charlotte had been so good to her—letting her take time off work and not having to worry about how soon she could get back. “Thanks.”
“I brought you some muffins. I gave them to June to heat up when you’re feeling up to it.”
Carly groaned. “I miss the muffins—and the cakes and the smell of the cafe. How’s everything going downtown?”
“Ticking along nicely,” Charlotte said. “We miss you at work, but we’ll get by until you’re back up on your feet.”
Carly knew that Charlotte was taking her lead. She didn’t push with the hard questions, and Carly appreciated it.
“People have been asking after you. Just wanting to know how you’re doing.”
“So everyone knows?” Of course they did. Carly knew better than to ask.
“You know how it is... small town. Word gets around quite quickly.”
Carly rolled her eyes. “Too quickly, if you ask me.”
“Have you heard from Mick?”
Carly nodded. “He’s been coming by every day.”
“Really? That’s great!” Charlotte’s face lit up before she caught herself. “I mean—that’s great, isn’t it?”
Charlotte was one of the few people that Carly trusted with her life. She’d been there for her from day dot. “I haven’t really spent time with him.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, well, he comes by every day and all. But I don’t see him. He sits down with Mom or Dad—or both. They talk in the kitchen or the living room. I can hear them.”
Charlotte’s face crumpled in confusion. “What?”
“He comes to see me, but I’ve refused to see him. So he spends the time with Mom and Dad instead.”
“Hmmm...” Charlotte gave it some thought. “You know, that’s pretty sweet.”
Carly smiled—more to herself, but she smiled just the same. “It is, isn’t it? I wish I wasn’t so cruel to him.”
“Have you been?”
Carly nodded, embarrassed about how she’d been acting. She told Charlotte about the time when she’d yelled profanities from her bedroom one after when Mick dropped by. “I was like a sulky teenager. Ugh—I’m so embarrassed.”
“Sounds like you were a bratty toddler.”
“Thanks,” Carly said, rolling her eyes.
“I call a spade a spade.”
“I’m not proud of how I’ve been acting.”
“So change it.”
Carly sighed. “I don’t know how to.”
“That’s donkey dung, Carly, and you know it.”
Charlotte was never afraid to call people out—especially Carly. Charlotte was like the big sister that Carly’s sisters had never been to her. But Carly knew that it wasn’t their fault. The three of them were all so young. Cancer had a way of bringing families together. In her case, it had caused them to drift apart. Her sisters, Caitlin and Courtney, had always felt that Carly got all the attention of her parents, as if Carly herself had willed it so. It didn’t help that with Carly’s first bout of cancer, Courtney was expecting her first child. Her parents had chosen to stay by her bedside rather than Courtney’s on the day that Courtney had given birth.
“Is that a new painting?” Charlotte asked when she’d spotted the canvas across the room.
With everything that’s happened recently, Carly had forgotten about it. She nodded.
“Who painted it?”
Carly smiled as she remembered that afternoon in the greenhouse with Mick. She told Charlotte about what Mick had done.
“Awww... that’s really, really sweet, Carly.”
“I know...” Carly closed her eyes. “I really thought that we would have a future together.”
“You still can, you know.”
Very slowly, Carly lifted her sweater and exposed her flat chest. The bandages were off and all that was left were scars—ugly, deep purple lines where her breasts used to be.
Charlotte drew a soft breath in as she covered her mouth with both hands. “Oh, Carly—”
“Please, don’t,” Carly said, looking away.
“Carly—”
“I know what it looks like.” Once again, Carly felt the sting of tears in her eyes. “I don’t want Mick to have to see me like this.”
“Honey, you don’t know what Mick is going to say or do.”
“I told him that it was best for the both of us if we didn’t pursue a relationship.” Carly pulled her sweater back down. Apart from her mother and Dr. Bennett, Charlotte was the only other person to see her body so badly damaged.
“And?”
“And he said that it was his decision to make.”
They sat in companionable silence for a moment. “He’s right, you know.” Charlotte was the first to speak. “You don’t know what he can or can’t do, or how much he can handle.”
“I’ve seen what it does to people, Charlotte.”
“But you haven’t seen what it does or doesn’t do to Mick.”
Carly looked away. “I don’t want to have to find out.”
“I get it—you’re scared.”
“I’m more than scared, Charlotte!” Carly’s voice rose a little too loudly, breaking into sobs.
“I know, honey.” Charlotte took her hand and gave it a squeeze. “I know.”
“What am I going to do?” Carly asked rhetorically. On the other hand though, she was hoping for an answer.
“Well,”—Charlotte began—“have you considered reconstruction surgery? They can do that, can’t they?”
“I mean, about Mick.” In spite of everything she had been through, the only that truly mattered now was Mick. She’d fought her feelings until now. Thinking that pushing him away was the best thing to do for Mick. But as much as she was afraid to admit it, she loved Mick. She loved him so much.
“I see...” Charlotte moistened her lips and let out a sigh. “You know, I had a chat with Jenna the other day. Mick’s staying with his mom.”
Carly looked at her best friend through tears in her eyes. “His mom? Why?”
“He decided to stay in Willow. He’s moved back permanently now, it seems. Did he not tell you?”
Carly wondered if he did tell her. “He probably did, but I was too stubborn to listen.”
“Do you love him?”
Carly closed her eyes and tasted the salt in her tears as it trickled down her cheeks. “So much.”
Charlotte’s face was filled with concern. “Oh, honey, why don’t you tell him?”
“I’m too scared. And besides, I think I might have ruined any real chance I have with him. I’ve said really nasty things to him. He’s seen me act like a spoiled brat.” More tears fell from her tired eyes.
“I think what you should say is he’s seen you at your worst.”
Carly nodded.
“And yet... he still loves you.”
Carly wiped her tears away. “Do you think so?”
“Mick has come back to the one place he vowed never to return to,” Charlotte said. “If you ask me, I think that’s a pretty good indication that the guy loves you.”
Carly took a deep breath in and exhaled slowly. “Can you do me a favor?”
Charlotte smiled. “Anything.”