DANIEL SPENT THE DAY in an anxious, excited frame of mind. What made matters worse was the fact that he didn’t know what he was trying to find out.
Was his father alive or not? Was his mother lying, and, if she were, why would she lie?
On his way to work he still couldn’t get his mind off the subject; and in the middle of the school day he kept on puzzling over the same questions.
He had given his year group the early part of the day to read a chapter from a classic novel. Later on he would divide them into smaller groups to talk about what they had read. In the meantime he sat in the staff room trying to ready himself for the day ahead. Before leaving home that morning he had decided to make a real effort.
He would be patient. He would smile at his fellow teachers. He would avoid scowling at the school bullies. In other words, he would try to be his normal self.
At lunchtime he went up to Judy and began talking to her about the project.
‘You saw Mr Brownjohn?’ she asked.
He told her about his visit to the old teacher. ‘I thought I would invite him in to talk to the entire class. He’s got a lot to say.’
He didn’t tell her quite how much. She smiled and nodded as if to show she approved. All this was normal and for a while Daniel almost forgot how much he had fancied her only the day before.
At the end of their talk she lowered her voice again. ‘Are you all right now?’
For a few seconds they looked into each other’s eyes. The room seemed to go quiet around them.
‘Yes. Thanks,’ Daniel said.
‘I want to talk to you,’ she said.
They went into an empty classroom.
‘What’s the problem?’ she asked him.
The problem, he thought, was that all of a sudden he wanted to kiss her and touch her body. Up to a couple of days ago he would have been worried about Louise and how she would feel. Now he didn’t seem to care.
‘You’re feeling trapped, aren’t you?’ Judy said.
He was about to open his mouth and say that he wasn’t when he realized that in the last few days that was exactly how he was feeling.
‘Why are you asking me?’ he replied.
She shrugged. ‘It takes one to know one,’ she said.
The door opened and a group of children looked in. A queue had begun to build up along the passage outside.
‘Let’s talk again,’ she said.
It wasn’t till later on that he thought about Louise and marriage. Had he wanted her at the start in the way he now wanted Judy? It had been much more relaxed. Sex with Louise had been part of going together. It had been a pleasure he got used to. But it had been easy, part of why he liked her, and it was something they did because they liked each other. Then it had been love – or that was what he thought. He could never imagine, though, pushing Louise up against the wall and pulling her skirt up. This was the exact thought that had come into his mind when he faced Judy in the empty classroom. What would life be like if he had these thoughts all day, then had to go home to Louise?
The rest of the day dragged on and on, but he still couldn’t focus as usual. It was a relief when the school day ended and he could leave.
He had arranged to meet Kate Hall at a café in the shopping centre near the school where she taught. The café was a big open space on the first floor of the shopping mall. Kate was sitting alone at a table not far from the entrance to the multiplex cinema. He would have guessed, he thought, that she was a teacher. Somehow he had expected her to look a bit like his mother, but she didn’t. She was small and plump. She had iron-grey hair and she was wearing a dark checked skirt, a white blouse and a fawn-coloured raincoat. He went straight up to her table and sat facing her.
‘You’re Daniel,’ she said. She smiled. ‘You look like your voice. A lot of people don’t. How is your mother?’
He told her his mother was fine and then went on to repeat his story about the surprise he wanted to arrange. In a couple of minutes he could see she had relaxed and was starting to trust him.
‘Your mother had a lot of friends,’ she said. ‘She was good fun.’
‘Do you know any of them?’
‘It’s a long time ago. I’m out of touch now.’ She reached down and picked up her briefcase from the floor. ‘I’ve got a couple of pictures here, though. I can tell you who they are.’
Daniel’s heart seemed to skip a beat. Perhaps this was it. ‘Just what I needed,’ he said, trying to sound casual.
The pictures were of the same group. There were a couple of dozen students, lined up in two rows. Kate went through them, pointing with her finger and calling out the names she could recall. ‘There’s your mother,’ she said. ‘She was so pretty.’ She sighed. ‘What about her sister? I only met her once or twice but she was a beauty.’ She lowered her voice. ‘I think she got into some kind of trouble. Your mother had to take some time off. But that was a long time ago. How is she now?’
‘She died.’
Kate looked shocked, and Daniel hurried to explain that this too was a long time ago. Without leaving her the time to respond, he pointed to the photo. Chris was standing in the second row, almost behind his mother. The features were blurred, not distinct, but Daniel knew who it was right away. ‘Who’s this?’ he asked.
‘Oh him. That’s Chris. Chris Adebowale.’ She said the name with some care, bit by bit, AD DAY BO WA LAY. She smiled with a touch of smugness at Daniel. ‘He was quite a lad. I couldn’t forget him. There used to be a man on TV from time to time with the same name. They were always getting it wrong, but it stuck with me.’
‘Have you ever seen him again?’ he asked.
‘Oh no,’ she said. ‘Shame, really. A friend of mine saw him about ten years ago. I’ve lost touch with her now, but she was at Heathrow going somewhere, and she saw him. Coming towards her, large as life. They spoke. He was on his way to Nigeria. Last I ever heard of him.’