Where is he?
I whirl the cart around.
“Did you see the tall boy I was with?” I ask a man standing in the lineup for Sidney Crosby. “He was probably talking to himself.”
“Sorry, can’t say I did. Why don’t you ask—”
I don’t wait for him to finish. I push the cart past all the people and glance down each aisle as I head to the other end of the store.
Nothing.
My last hope is the cereal aisle. Duncan usually gets obsessed with a new brand.
He’s not there.
I’m starting to freak. What am I going to tell Mom? My heart pounds in my chest like it does when I’m going in for a goal. I’m almost running now. The electronics section is at the end of the row. And then it hits me. He’s probably in the movie section.
I zoom around the corner and, sure enough, Duncan is standing in front of the big tv screen. The latest Spider-Man movie is playing, and he is glued to it— and I mean glued. If he was any closer, he’d be hugging the tv.
I’m relieved to see him, but at the same time I’m really ticked off. I wasn’t talking to Ian for that long.
“Duncan, you scared me,” I say. “You can’t run off like that!”
“I’m not Duncan, I’m Spider-Man!”
“I don’t care who you are! We’ve got to go.”
“But I want to watch.” He points at the screen.
“You can watch one when we get home. Come on.” I pull on his arm.
“No!”
“Stop embarrassing me,” I whisper. “Let’s go!”
I grab the cart and drag him out of the electronics section.
Bleep, bleep, bleep. The alarm goes off as soon as we walk through the area.
“Hang on there!” One of Bucky Dwayne’s security guys runs over. “I think you have something that hasn’t been paid for.”
Duncan has a video in his hands. Great!
“Oh, sorry, this is not what it looks like,” I say to the guy. “Duncan, you’ve got to give the movie back.”
“But I want it,” he wails.
“You’ve got a whole bunch at home. Come on, give it to me.” I try yanking it out of his hands.
“No!” Duncan says, clutching it to his chest. “I’m in charge.”
People are staring at us. If Duncan was little, they would ignore us, but a teenager having a tantrum like this is not a common sight. Bucky Dwayne’s security guy doesn’t know what to do. We’re now the Saturday entertainment.
“Oh, forget it…I’ll just pay for it!” I grab Duncan by the sleeve and walk over to the cashier in the electronics department.
“Can I pay for the rest of the stuff in my cart too?” I ask the cashier.
“Sure, that’s fine,” she says.
“I hope you’re happy!” I glare at Duncan.
“I like this movie,” Duncan tells the cashier.
“Well, let me scan it, hon.” She leans over the counter while Duncan holds it for her. She totals everything up. “That will be forty-five dollars and fifty-seven cents.”
I reach into my pocket and pull out the money, I start counting. A sick feeling twists my stomach around. Even with my own money I’m short eight bucks.
“Ah…I think I have to put something back,” I say quietly.
“Excuse me?”
“I don’t have enough,” I say a little louder.
“Supervisor to electronics,” she announces over the loudspeaker.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” a familiar voice moans from the back of the line. “What’s the holdup?”
I stand there like a complete loser, trying to ignore Cody Shanks.
“Hey, bonehead,” Cody jeers. “Are you going to answer me?”
I can’t bring myself to turn around. My face turns a thousand shades of red.
“You can go to the next department,” the cashier says to him. “Someone will help you there.”
“Whatever,” Cody grunts.
“He needs to strengthen his patience muscle,” the cashier whispers. “Don’t you think?”
“Yeah, something like that,” I say.
On the bus ride home, Duncan sits in his favorite spot behind the driver. He has a big smile on his face as he says hello to everyone who gets on the bus. I lean my head against the window as we fly along the Bedford Highway.
It’s hard to stay mad at him.
The next stop is ours. I make my way toward the front of the bus. “You can pull the bell now,” I say to Duncan. “But just once, okay?”
Duncan nods. “Just once.” He reaches up and yanks the rope. We’ve been practicing this for the last few months. The first couple of times, Duncan went crazy with the bell ringing. Today it goes off without a hitch.
“Good job.” I reach over to steady him as he stands up.
“Thank you, bus driver,” Duncan says before getting off.
“See you later, boys.”
We walk up the hill in silence. As I unlock the back door, I say, “We’d better be quiet okay? Mom is probably still sleeping.”
“She likes her bed,” Duncan says.
“Yeah, I know what you mean.”
I dump the shopping bags on the kitchen table. I notice a flyer for Sidney Crosby. If Dad had been alive, he would have made sure I got to meet him. Mom doesn’t have a clue who’s who in the hockey world. I tear up the flyer and shove it in the garbage. The lid slams shut with a bang.
I hear voices coming from Mom’s room upstairs. I thought for sure she’d still be sleeping. I knock on her door before sticking my head in. “You up?”
“Oh! You’re back. I couldn’t sleep, so I thought I’d just…”
I glance over at the tv. She’s been watching home movies. My stomach tightens as I catch a glimpse of Dad. He’s laughing and wading into the water with Duncan in his arms. I sit down on the bed.
“Wasn’t Duncan precious?” She reaches for a box of tissues and blows her nose.
“Sometimes I wonder what he’d be like now if he hadn’t had that awful fever.”
“Mom, don’t.”
“Daddy and I were so worried he wasn’t going to make it.”
“Why don’t I turn the lights on?” I ask.
“They’re burnt out,” she says. “I don’t know what’s wrong with them. One burnt out last night and the other went this morning. Oh, look at Daddy.” She points to the tv.
“I’ll go get the lightbulbs.” I would do anything to get out of that room. I find it hard to hear Dad’s voice. It makes me miss him more than I already do. Besides, I can’t stand seeing Mom cry.
I dump the groceries onto the kitchen table.
No lightbulbs.
Why did this have to happen on the day she’s crying over home movies?
I head back upstairs.
“Oh, Max, honestly. I thought the list was pretty straightforward!” Mom says when I tell her I didn’t buy lightbulbs.
“You’re not being quiet,” Duncan butts in. He’s standing in the doorway. “Remember, Max? You said to be quiet.”
“It’s okay, Duncan,” Mom says. “I couldn’t sleep.”
“I like my new movie,” he says in a deep voice. “Thank you, Max.”
She looks at me. “Is that why you didn’t get the lightbulbs, Max? You can’t give in every time he wants something. You know that.”
“You don’t understand what happened!” I plead.
She yanks the sheets off her bed. “All I wanted was lightbulbs. Was that too much to ask?”
She thumps around her bedroom picking things up. “I don’t have the patience for this, Max.” Her voice is shaky.
Duncan’s smile fades. He turns to leave, and then he notices Dad on the tv. “I want to talk to him. I want to see him now.” He walks over to the tv and starts hitting the top of it.
“Duncan, you can’t, sweetheart. It’s only a movie.” She puts her arm around him and rests her head on his shoulder. “I know it’s hard. We all miss him.”
“Dad’s not grumpy like you,” Duncan says.
Mom is fighting back tears.
“Come on, Duncan,” I say. “Let’s leave her alone.”
I turn on another movie for Duncan, hoping it will take his mind off Dad. Back in my room I flop onto my bed and pound my fists into the pillow.