The next morning Megan woke up filled with happy anticipation. She was going to spend another day with Ben, and if things went as she hoped – well, who knew what might come of it? Humming to herself she got up, then noticed the white envelope that had been pushed under her door.
Her heart sank as she picked it up. ‘Megan’ was scrawled across it in black ink. It had to be from him. He was only one person in the hotel who knew her. Why would he write to her, though, when they’d be seeing one another for breakfast?
Or would they?
She hesitated, then tore the letter open and scanned the few lines penned in a slashing, angular handwriting:
2 am
Sorry to do this to you, Megan, but I have to cancel our outing today. I’ve got to dash back to New York or the whole deal will come unstuck. I’m leaving in a few minutes.
I didn’t want to wake you – you looked exhausted last night – but I’ve got your mobile number and I’ll be in touch within a few days.
Look after that ankle.
Ben
Such bitter disappointment flooded through her that she couldn’t move for a moment. The day lost all its colour and tears welled in her eyes as she hobbled back to slump down on the bed. She re-read the letter, but it was still the same sparse message. It didn’t say any of the things she really wanted to know.
Like: was this just a tactful way to get rid of her? And if so, why? They’d been getting on so well. She’d been… hoping.
She went over the previous day in her mind and could see no reason for him to make excuses, none at all. He had seemed to enjoy her company as much as she’d enjoyed his. The New York trip must be genuine, then. He’d said he had calls to make when he left her.
If he’d had second thoughts about seeing her again, she wished he’d tell her straight out. This uncertainty was dreadful.
But he had made a point of taking her mobile number.
She couldn’t be bothered with breakfast, just took her time about getting showered and dressed. It hardly mattered what she wore now, did it?
What was she going to do with the day? She pulled a chair over to the window and sat staring out across the gardens, her thoughts still in a turmoil.
She was a fool to be so disappointed! After all, she hardly knew Ben Saunders. And he’d certainly given her little reason to pin any hopes on seeing him again. She should just forget about him and get on with her life.
She didn’t dive into relationships with people. It was one of her cardinal rules in life. She took her time, waiting till she knew them before allowing herself to care about them. She knew that put some people off, but that was how she had always been.
She froze for a moment as she realised that wasn’t true. She’d only been like that since she’d lost her parents. Before, she’d been a happy, impulsive child. But when you knew how much you could lose, you were more wary of letting yourself care. It was only natural.
But with Ben things had felt different. None of those awkward silences she’d experienced with other men, no struggling for something to talk about. She felt as comfortable sitting quietly with him as she did when they were chatting. He was every woman’s dream – not only attractive, but fun to be with, and kind, too. At least, he’d seemed kind.
She really shouldn’t get her hopes up. He probably wouldn’t call.
When she noticed she was pleating the material of her skirt in her agitation, she smoothed it out again, wishing she could smooth out her tangled feelings as easily. She was sure she was attracted to him, very sure of that. But not at all sure of anything else.
She drew in a deep breath. She couldn’t sit here all day mooning over Ben Saunders. She had her car back, thanks to him, so she’d check out of the hotel and visit the village where she’d grown up. After all, that was one of the reasons she’d come back to Northumberland. She wouldn’t be able to do much walking, but she could park in the village and look round a bit. Face up to the memories of her parents and her childhood.
Good thing she had an automatic car and had hurt her left ankle. She’d have had trouble driving otherwise.
Welburn was the same old jumble of houses clustered round an untidy oblong of grass. There was a café in the house next to the general store now, and the latter was called a Minimart, with a bright red sign, but apart from that not much seemed to have changed.
The house she’d once lived in was on the opposite side of the green. It looked smaller than she remembered, but was larger than her aunt and uncle’s cottage. Her father had worked in Alnwick; her mother had taught in the local primary school.
She smiled ruefully. She’d made the house into a palace in her thoughts and had thought of her life here as totally perfect. But it was just a smallish house, quite ordinary. And as an only child, she’d been lonely at times. Why hadn’t she remembered that?
Her parents had travelled a lot. It had been a passion of theirs. Sometimes they’d taken her with them, mostly they’d left her with friends or with her aunt and uncle in the Cotswolds.
She’d had a reasonably happy childhood, but looking back she realised suddenly how hampered such an adventurous pair must have felt with a child to look after, especially a child who was travel sick in cars and buses over even the shortest distance.
By the time they died, she’d just about grown out of that and they’d been planning a holiday in Australia for the following year, visiting a cousin of her father’s. They’d told her about Australia, making it sound wonderful, and that had sparked an interest in the country that had never left her.
She didn’t know why it had caught her imagination so strongly, but it had. It was stupid, really. She’d never even been across the Channel and here she was wanting to emigrate to Australia.
Sarah was right. In some ways she had got herself stuck in a rut. Well, that was going to stop right now. If she couldn’t emigrate, then she’d find something else to do with her life. Be more proactive about it all. Running a group of offices in Upper Shenstead wasn’t nearly enough. She had a little money saved and could afford to take a risk or two, move away, start a completely new life.
She should have come back here long ago and laid the ghosts to rest. She walked slowly across the road to look at her old home more closely and mentally said a proper farewell to it.
Now she was ready to move on.
She spent the rest of the day driving round, stopping occasionally to study the view or watch the world go by from the car. She felt at peace with herself and her ankle wasn’t too bad, considering. She’d go home the next day and return to work on the Tuesday, as planned.
And Ben would ring her. He’d promised.
But even if he didn’t, she’d still make some changes in her life.
By the time she got back to Sandy’s, Megan wanted only to lie on her bed with her ankle up. She had her mobile phone switched on and had half-expected to hear from Ben by now. Which was stupid really. If he’d had to rush back to New York in such a hurry, he’d be deep in business negotiations by now, or whatever he had to do there to make this deal go through.
What did she know about what a high-powered businessman did to make money?
Only – he should have been able to snatch a couple of minutes, at least, to call her. Shouldn’t he?
Sandy greeted her with, ‘I’m glad you came back early. I was feeling so fed up today!’
Megan could hardly walk away and ignore her friend’s plea for company, so she smothered a sigh and sat down.
She had to explain why she was limping and mentioned her car breaking down. But she didn’t mention Ben. Couldn’t bear to expose such a fragile thing to public view.
When she’d finished talking, Sandy patted her belly fondly. ‘It’s really kicking hard now.’
Megan let her chatter on about the coming baby, then went to unpack and check the battery in her mobile phone. After lying on the bed for a while trying to read a book, she began to feel as if the walls were closing in on her. What she’d really like would be to go for a brisk walk, but that wasn’t possible till her ankle got better.
In the end she decided to go and visit her aunt and uncle. They’d been complaining they hadn’t seen enough of her lately.
As she was getting into the car her mobile rang. She stared down at it, almost afraid to answer the call, then growled in annoyance at herself and answered it. ‘Megan Ross.’
‘Hi, Megan. Ben here.’
‘Hello.’ Joy welled in her. He hadn’t just been trying to get rid of her, then!
‘I’m sorry I had to rush away like that.’
‘Yes, it was a – a pity when we’d got another outing planned and—’ She was starting to babble. She clamped her lips together.
‘Megan, it looks like I’ll be back in England on Friday. Can we meet then?’
‘That’d be lovely.’ She beamed at the mere thought.
‘I’ll try to ring you again during the week.’
‘I’d like that.’
‘Oh, hell, there’s my taxi. I have to go now. Megan, I’m so glad we met.’
She sat staring at the phone for ages before she started the car, and couldn’t stop beaming as she drove along. Well, why shouldn’t she smile? He did want to see her again.
And she definitely wanted to see him.
As Megan limped up the path of her old home, she studied the neat little garden. Uncle John’s great love, that garden. What else had he done with his life? Or Aunt Eileen? Raised a family and stayed here in Upper Shenstead where they had both been born.
And she’d almost fallen into the same trap, because it was a lovely village and felt so safe. Only – it hadn’t been enough for her mother, who’d moved away from the area as soon as she left university, and it wasn’t enough for Megan, she knew that now.
There had to be something more to life than counting birds in the local woods, however necessary that task was! She wanted a husband, children – and even some modest adventures. This weekend had shown her that much, at least, even if nothing else worked out.
She had to keep reminding herself of that, because Ben wasn’t the usual sort of guy she went out with.
She knocked on the front door and called out a greeting as she opened it and walked straight into the front room. Uncle John, Auntie Eileen, Sarah, Don and little Amy were sitting with cups of tea in front of them, looking cosy and happy.
For a moment Megan felt like an outsider, then her uncle came across to hug her.
‘Great to see you, Meggie-girl. You haven’t called in for ages. You must have been working too hard.’
She returned his hug and the illusion of strangeness vanished.
‘You look well,’ her aunt said, sharp-eyed as ever. ‘But you’re limping.’
‘I twisted my ankle. It’s getting better.’
‘You’d better keep it raised. John fetch her a stool. And that’s a new sweater, isn’t it?’
Her aunt never missed a detail. ‘Yes. I bought myself a few new clothes. About time.’
‘The colour suits you.’ Sarah rocked the baby gently. ‘How much did it cost?’
‘Oh, too much. But I couldn’t resist it.’ She couldn’t resist little Amy, either. She held out her arms and took the child on her lap for a cuddle. And couldn’t help thinking yet again how much she would like a child of her own. A little boy with Ben’s eyes and strong body, and—
What on earth was she thinking of? She hardly knew him.
She hid her blush by cuddling Amy. Well, she hoped she’d hidden it, but Sarah was staring at her sharply. Let her cousin stare. She wasn’t going to tell Sarah anything about Ben. Two days wasn’t long enough to get to know someone well enough to – to start making announcements.
And anyway, there was nothing to tell them about.
She smiled brightly at Sarah and looked at Don, who was sitting gazing at his little daughter with a fond smile. He was a quiet man, a good foil for lively Sarah, but Megan knew she could never marry a man like him. He was too placid for her, too focused on domesticity.
‘You look as if you’re plotting something, Megan,’ her aunt said abruptly, just as she had when her niece was much younger.
‘I am, I suppose. I’m – er – considering applying for another job somewhere abroad. France might be nice. Or Brussels.’
‘You don’t want to go working abroad,’ said Don instantly. ‘You’ve got a good, secure job here. Don’t throw that away.’
Megan stared at him. He was a type England had been breeding for centuries, the sort of guy who went out to a foreign country and immediately set to work to make it into a replica of England. Now he really was a stick-in-the-mud.
‘But I’d like to travel!’ she insisted.
‘You always said you were happy here,’ Sarah protested.
Megan shrugged. ‘I was. Now I’m not. I went back to Wellburn at the weekend and it sort of crystallised things for me. You were right about one thing. I have been stuck in a rut. But I’m about to climb out of it.’
‘Bet you don’t!’
‘Bet I do.’
Sarah looked at her thoughtfully. ‘I hope you do.’
Megan didn’t stay long. Suddenly she felt greedy for life, for experience, for – Ben Saunders. You couldn’t call it love, not when they’d only just met. But maybe, if she was lucky, love would grow from the attraction between them. She couldn’t help hoping for that.
How long would it be before he called again?
Ben got back to his luxurious hotel room later than he’d expected. No use phoning her now. She’d be asleep. And the remaining days in New York were likely to be just busy as today had been.
How had he ever kept up such a frenetic schedule for all these years? He remembered the quiet peace of simply sitting with Megan in the car or strolling along a street, and marvelled at it. The time spent with her had been a golden interlude.
He ought to call Fran. He usually took her out when he was in New York. She was good company. But she wasn’t special. She had just helped fill the loneliness. She was lonely too and never stopped talking while they were together. And her hair was dyed red, not natural. Nor did it curl wildly and…
He frowned. What had got into him? He couldn’t get Megan Ross out of his mind. He couldn’t remember the last time a woman had affected him like this.
He frowned at the phone. Should he call her and wake her up?
No, better not. He got into bed, but it was a long time before he managed to sleep because he’d suddenly realised what he wanted to do. It was rash, it was risky, but he’d never wanted anything quite as much in his whole life.
He smiled in the darkness and began to relax. He’d taken a few risks in the past few years, but the one he was contemplating now out-shadowed all the rest. Would Megan agree to it, though?
She had to. He’d do whatever was necessary to convince her.
Then he frowned again. Well, anything except lying to her. He wasn’t going to start a relationship built on anything but the truth. Not with her.
On Tuesday Megan checked her mobile phone carefully when she got home, to make sure everything was working. But the battery was charged up and there were definitely no messages on her voice mail.
So he hadn’t rung.
On Wednesday evening, the little red phone did ring and she picked it up with a pounding heart. But it wasn’t him, just Sarah, trying to find out if something was going on. Megan didn’t tell her cousin anything and refused an invitation to go and share a take-away meal with them on Saturday evening. Then she had to face a further grilling about what she was doing that night before she could get off the phone.
On Thursday, her personal phone didn’t ring at all. She didn’t know why she even bothered to have a mobile. She hardly ever used it, the stupid thing! She ought to get rid of it.
She found it hard to stay positive about Ben Saunders as the days passed without further word from him. He was still occupying centre stage in her dreams. Every single night. What was there about this man?
He’d said he’d see her on Friday, but hadn’t made any arrangements. What was she supposed to do? Hang around until he deigned to call?
She’d just have to carry on as usual. What else could she do?
On Friday morning, the phone rang twice, once a wrong number and once a call from Mr Smethers, who was organising the protest vigil about a proposed development which would mean the end of a rather special wood, home to several rare plants. He wanted her to go out there on Saturday evening to replace poor old Mrs Branstone, who had ’flu.
‘Sorry, but I’ve sprained my ankle.’ Megan immediately felt horribly guilty because the ankle was almost better and she could perfectly well have taken part. After all, Ben hadn’t even tried to ring her again, had he? She’d give him a day or two more, then she’d wipe him from her mind. Absolutely. Get on with her life.
On Friday afternoon, when she returned to work after doing the banking, she found Ben waiting for her in the foyer and stopped dead, not knowing what to say or do. For a moment, everything seemed to whirl around her, then a soft exclamation of surprise and pleasure escaped her control. ‘Ben!’
He came across to kiss her cheek, which made the two receptionists nudge one another. ‘Come up to my office,’ Megan muttered, glancing meaningfully in their direction. ‘It’s too public here.’
He chuckled, but gave way to her insistent pull on his arm, thank goodness. She led the way briskly up the stairs.
Once they were inside her room he closed the door and leaned against it, watching her as she removed her coat. She hung it up slowly to give herself a minute’s respite. She didn’t know how to play this.
‘I’m sorry I didn’t call you again. There were a few glitches and I had to fly to Chicago as well in the end.’
She nodded and forced herself to look directly at him as she said what was in her heart, ‘I wondered if you’d changed your mind about seeing me again.’
He smiled and shook his head. ‘Definitely not.’
Her heart did a few quick somersaults and happiness began to flutter inside her.
‘Of course I hadn’t changed my mind!’ he said. ‘But the only times I was free, you’d have been asleep. I’ve had wall to wall meetings, thanks to a crisis.’ He frowned. ‘I should have rung, though, even if I’d woken you. I’m sorry.’
She nodded. She definitely wouldn’t have minded being roused in the middle of the night by a call from him. She watched him stroll over to the window which had a glorious view of the rear of another building, a row of dustbins and a line of parked vehicles. Very romantic.
He turned to look at her. ‘I’m really sorry I had to dash away from Northumberland without saying a proper goodbye. I was looking forward to showing you Bamburgh Castle.’
‘Never mind. Another time, maybe.’ She hoped she didn’t sound as feeble-minded as she felt, but his nearness was having its usual effect on her.
He had crossed the few feet of floor and taken her into his arms before she realised his intentions. ‘I’m glad you agreed to meet again, very glad indeed, Megan.’
The happiness expanded and warm tendrils of hope curled throughout her body.
‘I love the way you blush.’ His eyes were filled with amusement.
‘I’m always embarrassed by it.’
‘Don’t be. It’s very attractive.’
The door banged open and a voice said, ‘Oops! Sorry!’
Megan tried to move away, but Ben’s arms remained firmly clasped around her.
The solicitor from the just down the corridor grinned at her from the doorway. ‘Sorry to disturb you, Megan, my pet, but that damned coffee maker’s not working again.’
‘I’ll – er – call the service firm.’
‘Thanks.’ He winked at her and closed the door.
She put her hands to her hot cheeks. ‘Oh, heavens! It’ll be all over the building in two minutes that I’ve been kissing a man in my office.’
‘Who cares?’ Ben teased his fingers through her hair, releasing it from the clip she always held it back with for work. ‘I love curly hair, especially when it’s red.’
‘Auburn,’ she corrected automatically as she made another half-hearted attempt to pull away.
‘What time do you finish here, Megan?’
She looked at her in-tray, then gave way to temptation. ‘I can finish now, if you like. Karen can call up about the coffee maker and lock up tonight.’ Karen would love to take over her job completely.
As they walked outside together she was very conscious of the eyes following them and even more conscious of the man striding along next to her. What did he want to do tonight? There weren’t many places to eat out round here.
He stopped beside his Mercedes and clicked the lock control.
She pointed across the car park to her own vehicle, which looked even older and more battered in the cruel light of the sun. ‘I’ll have to take my car home first.’
‘I’ll follow you. Then we’ll discuss what to do.’
When they parked at Sandy’s, he got out and leaned against his car, looking more like a movie star than a businessman. ‘Have you got anything planned for this weekend?’
‘Well – no.’
‘Good. Go and pack a bag. You can show me Brighton Pavilion. And we can talk about our future.’
She stood glued to the spot. Our future? This was going too fast for her. She wasn’t ready to fall into bed with him yet, however strong the attraction between them.
He stared at her with narrowed eyes, seeming to guess what she was thinking. ‘We can have separate rooms, if that’s what’s worrying you.’
‘It is. I don’t…’ She couldn’t think of a tactful way to say it, so said baldly, ‘I’m not in the habit of sleeping with someone I’ve only just met.’ Even someone whose lightest touch turned her bones to jelly.
His eyes gleamed wickedly. ‘I’ll give my solemn word not to ravish you, if that’ll make you feel better.’
She could not help chuckling. ‘Thank you, Sir Jasper!’
The gleam in his eyes became more pronounced as he added casually, ‘Unless you change your mind, of course. I would never refuse a request from a lady.’
She stood very still, staring up at him. She had never believed that physical attraction could sweep you off your feet, but he had only to smile like that for her stomach to tie itself in knots. She tried for a more everyday tone, but wasn’t sure she achieved it. ‘Well – all right. Brighton it is. I’ll go and pack. Give me fifteen minutes.’
She fled towards the house, away from the hypnotic effect of his body and those dark gleaming eyes.
But she couldn’t resist turning at the door to smile at him and was delighted to see that he was watching her, smiling as well.
Inside she ran straight into Sandy, who screeched, ‘Who is he?’ and clutched her arm. ‘Oh, wow, what a hunk! And just look at that car!’
‘I met him in Northumberland.’
‘And you didn’t say a single word! You sly thing!’
Megan pushed Sandy gently aside. ‘I have to pack.’
But of course her friend followed her up the stairs. ‘What for? Where are you going?’
‘None of your business. And look, do me a favour, will you?’
‘Anything, as long as you’ll introduce me to the hunk.’
‘I’m not introducing you. Now will you do me the favour or not?’
Sandy sighed. ‘You’re mean and selfish and I’d do just the same if I were in your shoes. What’s the favour?’
‘Don’t tell my family about him. It’s too early.’
‘Is it serious?’
‘Could be.’
Suddenly Sandy hugged her. ‘All right, Meggie love. I won’t say a word.’ She turned at the door to wink and add, ‘Good luck!’
Outside, Ben watched Megan run into the house, admiring her long slim legs and flying hair. She was not only lovely, but transparently honest. And he loved her body, a real woman’s body with soft curves, not a stick insect like the female lawyer he’d been dealing with in Chicago who had been brittle and defensive, always ready with sharp answers, always suspecting his meaning.
No, Megan was very special. And even thinking of her made him feel happy.
Memories of other women made him scowl suddenly. Because he was rich, some of them had expected expensive presents, utter luxury, wasteful extravagance that was against his nature. One in particular had been very difficult to deal with, so beautiful and apparently caring that it had been a while before he had realised how rapacious she was underneath that beautiful exterior.
He sighed, looked at his watch and began pacing up and down. Only ten minutes had passed. Funny. It seemed longer.
Did he dare he trust his instincts about Megan? He shook his head in bewilderment. How could you ever tell for certain about another person?
The trouble was, he was booked to leave for Australia in just over a week and had intended to stay down under for a while. He could postpone the trip, though it’d be inconvenient, only he didn’t want to. What he really wanted was to snatch Megan Ross up and carry her away with him. Cave man revisited.
A wry smile curved his lips. It was an unusual feeling for him.
He looked up to see her coming out of the house and pure happiness flooded through him as her face lit up at the sight of him. He took the suitcase from her and tossed it into the boot, then opened the car door, and flourished her a bow. ‘Your chariot awaits, milady.’
She dropped him a curtsey. ‘Oh, milord. I am vastly obliged to you.’
He threw back his head and laughed. It felt so good.