He was quiet so long she thought he wasn’t going to respond. When he did, he spoke in a low tone.
“Jack and I were friends since we were kids. The Morgan ranch is to the south of the Broken Arrow, and our families have helped each other out for generations. I spent a lot of time with him and his sister, Kacey. We did everything together. Hiked, went fishing, did kid things. When we got to be teenagers, Jack would snag a few of his dad’s beers and we’d go out to the river and drink. Thought we were a bunch of frigging badasses. We all went to high school here in town. Me and Jack were a year older than Kacey.”
Gwen thought she knew where the tale was heading. Wasn’t it the classic scenario? Childhood friends who grew up and realized they wanted to be more than friends. She steered the truck along the winding road, headlights creating a tunnel of light.
“Kacey and I started dating at the beginning of my senior year, and I’d guess you could say we were pretty hot and heavy for a time. Jack was going with a friend of Kacey’s and it seemed about perfect. For a while.” He paused, and Gwen thought he must be sorting through the memories. “We had a group of kids from school we hung out with. We’d go to someone’s house or all show up by the river or in the hills someplace in our trucks and party.”
“Really? Kids out in the boonies party, too?”
He gave a wry laugh. “Yeah, we partied. Someone was always able to get some beer. A few were into smoking pot, but me, not so much. I tried it but didn’t like feeling that I wasn’t in control of myself. And I never drank more than one beer.”
“Ah, the responsible one.”
“Someone had to be. Kids were getting pretty wasted and I felt I had to make sure no one got in their trucks to drive home unless they were sober.”
“So what happened?”
“Kacey began partying more and more. If I couldn’t go, she went anyway. I was trying to keep my grades up, didn’t want to mess up my chances of getting accepted to college, but she didn’t see the point. She gave me a hard time about it, kept telling me I was wasting the best years of my life trying to be better than everyone else.”
“What changed?”
“I did, I guess. Kacey had always wanted the same thing. She wanted to graduate from high school, marry a rancher, and raise a big family. She said she’d give up the partying once we were married. It was almost like she thought she could make a bargain. She knew I didn’t like her partying so she would give it up if I married her.”
“Was that what you wanted?”
She glanced over to see him shrug, then wince. “At first, yes. But eventually I realized I didn’t. At least with her.”
“You didn’t love her.”
“I guess I didn’t, at least not enough. I also realized I wanted someone who knew more about the world than what was in this corner of the Sierras. But she wasn’t interested in anything. She didn’t care about politics, not even local issues that had an impact on our way of living. She made noises about going to the junior college in Carson City, but I really didn’t think she’d do it. Then I got accepted to UC Davis, and she didn’t want me to leave. Said I’d never come back, that if I left, I would ruin everything.”
“Did you go?”
“Yeah, I went. I loved college. I missed the ranch and my dad, but I liked the classes, meeting new people, living in the dorms. I had a great time.” He paused, and Gwen wondered how much the bruises hurt. She turned onto the gravel road to the Broken Arrow.
“During my second year, I came home at Thanksgiving. Things weren’t right between Kacey and me, but we hung out, then I went back. When I came back for the winter holidays, I’d decided that I’d break it off with her.” He leaned back in his seat, fingering the brim of the hat laying on his lap. “I waited until after Christmas. It was horrible, I didn’t want to ruin her holiday, but I couldn’t enjoy myself because I knew I was going to make her unhappy.
“We got together Christmas afternoon. We were sitting in my truck out by the river where we used to always drink, with the heater running because it was so damn cold, and she handed me this box with a big red bow on top. It was about this big.” Gwen turned her head and saw Eli holding his fingers apart about four inches, an enigmatic look on his face.
“Yeah?”
“I opened the box and there was this thing, I didn’t know what the hell it was. I thought maybe it was a thermometer or something. But she’s got this expectant look on her face. I must have looked totally clueless because she started laughing. She said it was a pregnancy test, that she’d peed on this thing. I looked at it again and it had a little red plus sign on it.”
“Oh God.”
“Oh God is right. She started hugging and kissing me and telling me we were going to have a baby, and I felt like the spring had clamped shut on the mother of all bear traps. She wanted us to go back to her house so she could tell her family. She’d kept it a secret until she could tell me. So we went back and told her folks, and the next thing I knew, Kacey and her mom were planning our wedding. Everyone assumed we’d get married.
“They wanted to have the wedding right away, and I felt like that bear trap was around my throat. I was trying to tell them to slow down, we needed to talk about some things, but they weren’t hearing me. I finally got them to stop and listen for half a second, and told them I was going to go back to college and wouldn’t be home until June.”
Gwen steered the truck to a stop in front of the house and shut off the engine. She turned in her seat to look at Eli as he spoke. “Kacey was getting set to have a tantrum. She’d get this look in her eyes like she was calculating how much of an effect a tantrum would have. She’d been doing the same thing since she was a kid. Then her mom holds up her hand and says that’s fine, they’d plan a wedding for the end of June.”
“What did you do?”
“I went home and told my dad. He was real quiet, asked if I was sure the baby was mine.”
“Were you?”
“Yeah, Kacey and I had been together at Thanksgiving and the timing worked out. Besides that, I never thought she would go out with someone else. The funny thing was we’d always used condoms before, but when I came back for Thanksgiving break, she said she’d gone on the pill and we didn’t need to use anything.” He shrugged. “Looking back, I think she lied to me, and got pregnant on purpose. I’d disrupted her timeline enough by going off to college, and she was going to make damn sure I didn’t mess up her plans to get married. But since I’d had some doubts, I should have used a condom, so it was my fault.”
“Did your dad think you should get married?”
“Yeah, he did. People out here can be pretty conservative about things like that, and if a guy is going to have sex with a woman, it’s understood he’ll step up if she gets pregnant.” His lips twisted in a wry grin. “Funny thing is, that’s why my mom and dad got married. They’d hooked up when he was in San Francisco on a business trip, and she’d gotten pregnant with me. Look how well that worked out.”
A gust of wind rocked the truck, and she glanced outside. The stars were obscured by clouds, signaling a storm rolling in.
“The pisser was that Dad had been waiting until after the holidays to tell me his own news. He’d been diagnosed with lung cancer. The Marlboro Man had sucked down too many cigarettes.”
“Oh, Eli, that’s horrible.”
“Yeah.” He shifted in his seat and Gwen could tell by his movement that he was in pain.
“We should go in, get you some meds.”
“Gwen, let me get it all out, then you’ll understand. Okay?” She nodded, and he continued, “We set a wedding date and I went back to college. I worked my tail off, got a part-time job, and about drove myself to exhaustion. I was angry and felt trapped, but what could I do? I had a baby on the way.”
“That sure is one huge reality check.”
“Yeah, it was a kick in the ass. But it turns out that while I was working and going to class and studying half of every night, Kacey was still partying. Jack called me, thought I should come home, argued that I wasn’t going to be able to finish my degree anyway, so why not come home and help Kacey get straightened out.
“I called Kacey, told her she couldn’t be partying when she was pregnant, that she was going to mess up the kid. She got nasty, said if I cared so much why didn’t I come home and then she’d stop. I refused. I couldn’t leave my job and I had midterms the next week. My dad was getting treatment at the UC Davis Medical Center and staying with me in my apartment, so I was pretty tapped out. But I said I’d try to make it home over one of the three-day weekends that were coming up.”
He paused and was quiet for so long, she wondered if he was going to finish. “Then late one night I got a phone call from Jack. Kacey had been in a car accident. She’d been drinking and wrapped her car around a tree.” He passed a hand over his face, and even in the darkness Gwen could see the haunted expression. “I raced home. That was the longest drive of my life. By the time I got to the hospital she’d already lost the baby, and she died at dawn.” The quiet and darkness leant an eerie intimacy to sitting together in the truck. The porch light from the house cast enough of a glow that she could make out the pain in his expression.
“I’m so sorry, Eli.”
“Yeah, me too.” He reached out an arm to stretch across the back of the seat, toying with her hair. “You’re a good listener.”
She felt the little tugs as he ran his fingers through the ends of her hair where it had come loose from the braid. She asked the question that was bothering her most. “What I don’t understand is why Jack is so angry with you.”
“Because it was my fault.” He sighed at her look of disbelief. “I didn’t cause the accident, but if I had been around, Kacey wouldn’t have been out partying. Jack, his brother Garrett, his parents, they were looking for someone to blame and figured I’d do. To an extent, they’re right. And to top off a shitty year, my dad died four months later.”
He was gazing fixedly outside the window, looking more than a little lost. Without second-guessing the impulse, she lay a hand along his jaw. “I can’t imagine how hard that must have been. How did you get through it?”
“By doing whatever came next.” He turned toward her, bringing up his hand to cover hers.
“Did you finish your degree?”
“Yeah. I was ready to give up on that, but my mom stepped up at that point. She wanted me to have options, in case I didn’t want to ranch for the rest of my life. She convinced me to hire a manager for the Broken Arrow so I could finish.”
Heat was traveling up Gwen’s arm from where her hand was pressed between his stubble-covered jaw and calloused fingers.
“That’s good. I’m glad you finished.”
He turned in his seat so he was facing her, not letting go of her hand. “When I first met you, I misjudged you. Mom had let Chloe grow up wild, and I was afraid she’d go off the deep end like Kacey.”
“And you thought I would help her get there.”
He kissed her palm, gaze on hers. “I’m sorry. I misjudged you.” Then he was pulling her toward him, leaning forward to meet her lips with his. The kiss burned through her like fire, wild and consuming. He shifted again and uttered an oath laced with pain.
She laughed softly. “Come on, Eli. You need a hot bath with Epsom salts and some pain meds.” She grabbed the bag with her clothes from the backseat and opened the truck door.
“You’re so romantic.” His words brought a warm flush to her cheeks, but he got out of the truck, moving slowly.
Approaching the steps to the porch, Gwen heard quiet footfall behind them. Eli whirled, putting out an arm to push her behind him.
“Eli, it’s me.”
Ben Cutter stepped into the light from the porch and Eli relaxed his guard. “Whit told me what happened. You both okay?”
“Yeah. Bruised up a bit, but we’re good.”
Ben nodded. “Daisy wanted me to let you know Cameron and the kids are already asleep. She said to sleep as late as you want in the morning, we’ll take care of the boy.” Even in the shadowed light from the porch, Gwen could see the concern on Ben’s face. “You need anything, brother?”
Eli shook his head. “A few pills and a couple of days should take care of this.”
“The men and I will take care of the ranch work. Give yourself a break and take it easy tomorrow.”
Eli gave a short laugh. “I may just take you up on that. Thanks, Ben.”
Ben gave a wave before disappearing into the darkness.
Gwen followed Eli across the porch and into the house. She flipped on the lights and started for the stairs. “I’ll go draw you a hot bath with Epsom salts.”
“Gwendolyn.”
She paused with her foot on the first tread, brow raised in question.
“I don’t want a bath. Let me get some Tylenol and maybe a shot of JD and I’ll be good.”
“Eli, really. It will help with muscle aches. And you could still have the meds and whiskey.”
But he was already walking to the kitchen shaking his head. “No bath.”
With a huffing breath, Gwen followed him. He opened a cupboard and reached up to retrieve a bottle from the top shelf. He winced as he stretched his arm. Gwen gave a frustrated sigh and located the Tylenol, thankfully the extra-strength variety. She filled a glass with water, then shook out a couple of pills. “You know, I don’t think drinking alcohol with the medicine is a good idea.”
Eli frowned, then pushed the bottle to the back of the counter. “You’re probably right. Sounds good, though.” He took the pills from her and drained the glass. “You should take a couple for that.” He flicked a finger along her bangs where she’d gotten hit by the pipe. “I’m going to get horizontal for a while.”
She looked at his tired face and reached up to lay her palms on his shoulders. “Thank you,” she said quietly. Then, standing on tiptoes, reached up to press her lips to his. He held himself motionless, the only evidence of a reaction was his hands convulsively gripping her hips.
When she settled back on her feet, he didn’t release his hold. “What are you thanking me for?”
“For coming to my rescue. I was scared and I knew I couldn’t fight them for much longer, and then you were flying at Thug Two like an avenging angel. I’ve never been more relieved to see someone. Once you were there, I knew I was safe.”
He leaned forward to return the kiss. “Then you’re welcome.” When he pulled back, his eyes were shadowed. “You know I would protect you with my life.”
She nodded slowly. Somehow, she’d always known that, and it was that knowledge that had brought her to him when she and Cameron were in danger.
Eli turned and walked out of the kitchen, his tread slow on the stairs. A lot about Eli was coming clear, even about her own relationship with him. She laughed at the irony. When she’d first met him and he’d assumed she was a wild party girl, playing on his assumptions had been the exact behavior that would draw out the worst in him. Given what had happened to Kacey and their unborn child, she now understood his fear for Chloe and his harsh judgment of Gwen.
She opened the cupboard to put back the bottle of Tylenol and saw a tub of the same liniment they’d used earlier. Grabbing it, she climbed the stairs. A rumble of thunder heralded the storm drawing nearer.
Eli lay face down across his wide bed, still wearing his boots. She turned on the lamp on his nightstand.
“Eli, you need help.”
“Go away.” His voice was muffled.
“I’m not going away. Take off your shirt.”
“No. It hurts to move.”
“I bet it does. I found a tub of the liniment. The pain will ease once I’ve rubbed some more on those bruises.” She set the tin on his dresser and bent to grip one boot. It came off with a couple of good tugs. She set the boot down and pulled off the other. “Sit up.”
“I said go away.”
“Don’t make me use my teacher voice. Sit up, Eli.”
“Teacher voice, my ass.”
“We may get to your ass if it has a bruise on it, but for now I’ll start with your back.”
“Ha. The teacher said ‘ass.’”
“Eli—”
“Okay, okay.” With a groan, he turned over, then took a deep breath and sat up. Moving carefully, he rose and crossed to the dresser where he pulled flannel pants from a drawer. Without saying a word, he went into the bathroom. Deciding that if the liniment got onto the bedding it would be easier to wash the sheets than his quilt, Gwen pulled back the covers and fluffed the pillow.
Eli spoke from behind her. “Well, darlin’, planning to join me?”
Gwen slowly straightened as she took in the bloom of multicolored bruises covering his torso. A wide purple abrasion started at his hip and disappeared under the elastic waistband of the dark plaid pants. “I’ll give you a pass for being a jerk, but you need to work on that.” When he sighed, she ordered, “Lie down, Eli. We’ll get this over with and I’ll leave you alone.”
He lay face down once again, head on the pillow, arms raised above his head. Gwen pried the lid off the tin, then scooped pale green balm onto her fingers. She warmed it in her hands, and the pungent aroma filled the air. She rubbed the balm firmly into the long muscles of his back, then more lightly over the contusions.
“You need to roll over so I can take care of the bruises on your chest.” When he didn’t move, she touched his shoulder. “You fall asleep, cowboy?”
“More like comatose,” he muttered, but he rolled over. He lay with his eyes closed as Gwen went to work, rubbing with steady pressure. Even relaxed, his chest and abdominal muscles remained well defined. She rubbed, letting her fingers glide through his chest hair, down, along the ridge of muscle at his hip. She told herself the curl of desire rising low in her belly was entirely inappropriate.
“You’ve got magic fingers.”
She paused, then resumed rubbing. “Yeah, that’s me, magic fingers.” She glanced surreptitiously at Eli’s face and, seeing his eyes closed, gave in to the pleasure of looking at him. Though he was a far cry from conventionally handsome, there was something about his looks that worked for her. The tousled dark hair, the winged eyebrows, the hard edge of his jaw. And she really liked his shoulders, wide with thick muscles that projected strength. Her gaze rose to his face again to find his eyes open, glittering dangerously.
The air charged, like the buildup to an electric storm.
“Your breathing changed, got deeper.”
Yeah, because touching you is getting me hot. “Aah, must be the fumes from the liniment. I think I’m done with it.” She set down the container. “One more thing and I’ll let you sleep.” Gently, she lifted the hair off his forehead to inspect the scrape there. As she bent closer, she caught the deepening of his breath.
She beat a hasty retreat to the bathroom and, once out of sight, took a moment to steady herself, to try to regain her equilibrium. The tension between them was growing more volatile.
All that was needed was a spark and there’d be an explosion.