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Dean passed me a soft, much-washed T-shirt from his closet, and I tugged it over my head. It seemed I was staying the night. I was so tired, I didn’t care any more.
When he snuggled behind me in bed, I let out a breath I wasn’t aware I was holding. This would be okay. I didn’t have to be up early in the morning. On Saturdays, I started work at ten.
The last thing I remembered was Dean draping a heavy arm across my waist. It felt sweet.
If a small bird had laid a nest in my mouth, it couldn’t feel any more scratchy and dry. The taste on my tongue was beyond disgusting. I was never drinking again while on anti-depressants. My stomach complained, and sunlight bathed my eyelids in warmth. Something heavy lay next to me.
Without opening my eyes, I rolled over in bed and stretched out for Dean.
He was furrier than I expected.
When a large wet tongue licked my hand, I laughed. “King,” I mumbled. “What have you done with Dean?”
“I’m here.”
I blinked against the light, and saw him in the doorway. Fully dressed in jeans and a T-shirt.
“Tea?” He asked. “Or do you prefer coffee?”
“Either is good. Thank you.” Now I was awake, I needed the bathroom, but walking half-naked in front of him was tricky. Hell, this situation was awkward.
“Breakfast?”
He was so nice, but I couldn’t stay. “No, thanks.” I sat up and took a peek at the shirt I wore. It would fall to my knees. I could get out of bed without embarrassing myself further.
I brushed my teeth and managed to mute the disgusting taste in my mouth, and then I dressed in yesterday’s clothes. Not the panties, though. I folded them into a small bundle and shoved them in my back pocket. I didn’t have far to go. I could handle any chafing from my jeans, and it might hammer home a lesson about getting drunk and spending the night with an almost-stranger.
I found Dean with King in the kitchen. Dean sat at the table, fussing over my dog. I watched silently for a moment, wishing things were different. That I wasn’t making my exit now. That I hadn’t been stupid the night before.
“Hey,” I said. “Thanks for everything. I’ll be off now.”
Dean looked up, his hands still in King’s thick ruff. “Not bothering with the tea?”
“No.” I stood prim as a Sunday-school teacher and tried to keep my distance from him.
It didn’t work. When he stood and closed the gap between us, I wanted to melt into his arms. “I’ll drive you home,” he said.
Last night I submitted to his control, but not today. I needed to rebuild my emotional armour, and that meant getting away as quickly as possible. “It’s not far. I’d rather walk, thank you.”
“In that case, it won’t be far to drive.”
“Dean.”
He quirked his eyebrows. “I want to make sure you get home in one piece.”
I didn’t have the energy to fight. “Okay.”
“Sure you don’t want breakfast first? Or do you have to work today?”
“No to breakfast and yes to working, but not for a couple of hours.”
He nodded. “Let’s go.”
A few minutes later, he parked as directed in front of the café. “You live near here?”
“I live right here.” I pointed through the window. “The little apartment upstairs.”
“Handy for work.”
“Yes.” I was done with small talk, but Dean hadn’t finished yet.
He twisted in his seat, to face me. “Last night didn’t go like I expected. Will you be okay?”
That question was loaded on so many fronts. I dug deep and found a smile. “I’ll be fine. That was the best not-sex I’ve ever had, by the way. The night wasn’t all bad.”
He gave a surprised laugh. “Yeah.”
I waited a beat, wondering if he’d want to see me again, to have a replay some time, but he stayed silent. His odd-coloured eyes were mesmerizing, and I’d love to spend more time staring into their depths, but that wasn’t an option.
“See ya,” I said, in a cheery voice. I let my dog out of the car, waved to my gorgeous fireman, and headed up to my apartment.
*
The weather was glorious, and the café was bursting at the seams with a constant stream of holidaymakers, mixed in with some locals. I was learning to recognise the regulars and anticipate their drink needs, and this earned me a smile and a hug from Lou. She chattered about the party—Zack’s engagement—and the fun everyone had, and how sad she was I’d missed it.
I smiled and said uh huh in the right places, and managed to avoid being drawn into conversation. I couldn’t ignore her, though, when she came to find me on my break. “Steph? The new fireman, Dean, asked if you were free.”
I was in the process of pouring some juice and assembling a sandwich, to eat in the courtyard. There were no realistic excuses for avoiding him. “Sure,” I said. “Will you tell him I’ll be outside in a minute?”
I could tell Lou was bursting to know why he wanted to see me, and I was curious. I thought we’d covered everything this morning.
Did I have time to duck into the bathroom and check my face and hair? This was the guy who saw me vomiting into his toilet yesterday, but pride made me want to look good. My hair looked as blonde and fluffy as ever, and apart from the shadows under my eyes I looked my usual self. Perhaps I should dye my hair? People always looked at me and saw blonde. If I was a brunette, would they take me more seriously?
When I hosted my exhibition, I wanted to make an impact and to look professional. A new outfit and haircut would help.
And I was stalling while I readied myself to see Dean. I squared my shoulders, lifted my chin, and headed to the seating area outside.
He sprawled in his seat in a patch of sunlight, the daily newspaper open in front of him, next to a coffee. His eyes were obscured by shades, and he looked pretty chilled, unlike me, who was a bag of nerves.
Get over it, Steph, I told myself. It’s only embarrassing to be with him if you let it. I walked up to his table. “Hey,” I said. “Did you want to speak to me?”
He flashed me a smile and gestured to the juice and sandwich in my hands. “Yours?”
I nodded.
“Join me.” It was a command, not a question.
“I only have a few minutes.” But I sat anyway.
He slid the sunglasses from his face and placed them on the table. His eyes were very pretty.
No. I couldn’t get distracted. “How can I help you?”
His lips curved in the start of a smile. “So formal. I wanted to ask you something, although I’ll understand if you don’t feel comfortable answering me here.”
Was he going to ask me for a replay? My pulse picked up, and dark excitement unfurled in my belly. “Go on.” It came out breathless.
He leaned forward, his face a study in concentration. “I was talking to Lisa, Hal’s wife.” He grimaced. “Hal’s widow. Fuck. I hate that word.”
The slap of disappointment was disorienting. My cheeks burned. I’d been thinking about sex, while he was talking about his lost friend. Focus, Steph. Thankfully, he didn’t seem to expect me to say anything. I tried to cover my discomfort by sipping the juice.
“So,” he continued, “she’s been told to do other things besides take the medication. Things to make sure she doesn’t become reliant on it.”
I nodded.
“This is kinda tough, you know?” He glanced left and right. Other customers surrounded us. “I wanted to talk to you about it.”
I appreciated his discretion. “If you’re free later, we could talk on the beach.” There went my resolve, faster than a speeding train.
Did I really think I could avoid him? More fool me.