Chapter 39

T

he first few entries confirmed what Eve had already told Nicole about the evacuation to England. What was also clear was Eve’s instant attraction to Philip: “I stood rooted to the ground as this Young God smiled at me. He even knew my name!”

Flicking through the pages Nicole read vivid descriptions of Home Farm – “The farmhouse is an old granite building in a lot better state than my parents’ farm. It’s a long, low building with the dairy at one end, next to the pens for the chickens. I was told we have to lock ‘em in at night to keep them safe from the foxes, something we don’t have to worry about back home. During the day the hens are allowed to roam everywhere and our job is to search their favourite laying spots for eggs. The other girls said one of ‘em always lays right on top of the hay bales, meaning a bit of a climb for us. Pesky bird!…The cows are enormous! Big red South Devon cows they are, so different to our gentle Guernseys. But I’m told they’re good milkers.”

Nicole was intrigued when, further along, she found descriptions of Moreton Hall, the family home. It certainly sounded grand – “I’ve not seen anything like it before! It’s bigger and grander than Saumarez Manor and they told me it’s Elizabethan. It does look very old, for sure. Made of stone, with tall chimneys sticking up into the sky and dozens of little leaded windows watching everywhere you go. I went there when us Land Girls were introduced to Sir Michael and Lady Andrews. They were that snobbish that they made us stand in the hall while we gave them our names. We were then packed off to the kitchen for a cup of tea with the cook. Of course, they only lived in The Wing, the main part was for wounded soldiers. But it would have been nice to see something of the house. I did see the enormous black oak staircase and loads of beams.”

The diaries went on to describe the daily life on the farm, making Nicole feel thankful for her much easier lot in life. “The milking barn …freezing, with a draught through the large open doorway…had to check for signs of rats…and in the hay barn…set special traps. Our bedroom…so cold that we’ve slept in our clothes, huddled under our coats and bedspreads…so tired…up at five.”

Eve also recorded how she became friends with Lady Helen, Philip’s paternal grandmother, while delivering food from the farm to the Dower House. “By rights I shouldn’t have seen Lady Helen as I was directed to go straight to the kitchen. But as I was headed there, she came out from the garden and asked me who I was. We got chatting and she seemed to like hearing about Guernsey and asked me to call in again. So I will.”

Philip became a prominent part of Eve’s daily musings and Nicole read of her growing feelings for him. Initially it seemed that Eve thought Philip was merely flirting with her and couldn’t be serious. The social gap was too great. “When he looks at me with that big smile, I feel all gooey inside, like I’m the only one he has eyes for. But I know that can’t be true, as Mrs Combe told me his parents hope Philip will marry a Miss Leyton from a nearby estate. So I know he can’t love me. Not like I love him.”

Nicole felt Eve’s pain from all those years ago. A young woman, only eighteen, and in a strange country and in love with a man supposedly out of reach. But it seems Philip was a good man and loved her in spite of his parents. Eve’s joy shone through as she realised her love was reciprocated. “When he kissed me tonight after the dance, he whispered,‘I love you and I want to marry you’. Marry me! He said he wanted to marry me. I nearly fainted in shock. I’d never dreamed…although I’d hoped…He said we’d have to wait a while…the war…But I’m happy to wait. I only need to know we’ll be married one day. For now, we have to keep it a secret…his parents…but he’s telling his grandmother.”

Taking a break from reading, Nicole stood up and stretched before checking on her grandmother. Eve slept peacefully, her breathing still slow but less laboured. Nicole returned to her chair and unscrewed the top of the Thermos flask holding much needed hot chocolate. As she sipped the thick, reviving drink, Nicole found her mind filling with images brought to life by her grandmother’s words. It felt so real and as she gazed at the recumbent form before her, it seemed as if her grandmother’s life was flashing before her eyes, a bit like that of the proverbial drowning man. Although, in reality, only a very small part of Eve’s life, Nicole knew it was the most significant.

As Nicole read on towards the end, she discovered what Eve had meant by the “truth”. And her heart sank.

After being relieved by Adrian promptly at four o’clock, Nicole crawled upstairs to bed. Weighed down by more than physical tiredness, she fell asleep instantly, not waking until late morning.

Walking into the kitchen Nicole made herself a coffee and took it outside, hoping the fresh air would help to revive her. She let the sun’s rays play on her body and began to feel the tension of the night ease. The caffeine hit also played its part and she was just about to return to the kitchen for some toast when Hélène appeared.

‘Morning. Did you manage to get much sleep?’

‘Yes, thanks. Just coming round now. How’s Grandmother?’

Hélène bit her lip. ‘No change. The nurse is with her now and I’ll relieve her at lunchtime. Hope you didn’t get too bored last night, did you have a good book to read?’

If you only knew! Nicole thought, muttering that she had.

After finishing her toast Nicole told Hélène she was going out for a walk.

With a shock, Nicole realised she’d not left the house since the wedding four days ago and struck out along the cliff path in pursuit of serious exercise. The fresh breeze carried the salty air from the sea below, soon clearing the cobwebs. She shifted into a light jog. Squabbling seagulls wheeled and shrieked over her head but otherwise it was as if she was alone; just her and the sea shimmering below. Her thoughts careered around her brain as she reviewed what she’d learnt. Letting out a heartfelt sigh, she returned home, trying to prepare herself for what lay ahead.

Ben arrived that afternoon and, after checking on Eve, told the waiting family that he could find no change.

Hélène poured him a cup of tea as they sat on the terrace lost in their own thoughts.

‘My mother’s not in a coma is she? Only she hasn’t woken for hours now.’

‘Not quite, no. Her body’s slowly shutting down. Sleep is natural at this stage but she may still wake up and want to talk before becoming unconscious again.’ He gripped Hélène’s hand. ‘Your mother’s very peaceful and she’s in no pain. But please call me at any time if you’re worried.’

Nicole walked with Ben to his car and told him she’d read the diaries. She shared what she’d learned and they both agreed that it would be better to wait before telling Hélène.

After another night of shared vigil Nicole was glad to creep back into her bed. Eve had remained unconscious but her breathing had changed. Shallow, quick breaths were followed by spaces of no breathing, leaving Nicole on edge during the long, weary hours. Even the latest PD James novel failed to grab her attention.

She was aroused from a deep sleep by the nurse shaking her arm.

‘Nicole, wake up! Your grandmother’s come round and wants to see you.’

Dragging on jeans and a T-shirt, Nicole followed her downstairs to Eve’s bedroom. The nurse stayed outside as Nicole hurried over to join a white-faced Hélène at Eve’s side.

‘I’m here, Grandmother.’

Hélène moved away to give her room and Nicole reached for Eve’s white hand. It felt icy cold. Eve’s eyes flicked open and for a moment Nicole thought she saw a slight spark.

‘Did you…find the…diaries?’ Nicole strained to hear Eve’s hoarse voice.

‘Yes, and I’ve…I’ve read them. It’s all right, Grandmother, I know what to do. Don’t worry.’ Nicole’s eyes filled with tears as Eve released a soft sigh, a smile hovering around her mouth.

‘Thank you…my dear. Be happy…won’t you? Love is…important. God Bless.’

Eve closed her eyes and, as Hélène reached for her other hand, let out her last breath and lay still.