Ed was halfway down Emily’s road when he reached for his phone and remembered he no longer had one. How was he going to get directions?
He briefly considered going back to Emily’s, but she’d made it clear he was the last person she wanted to see right now. She couldn’t get him out of the door quick enough and had barely given him a chance to say hello to Mark.
Well, what did you expect?
The lights from a convenience store loomed into view.
‘Hi,’ Ed said to the guy behind the counter, who was playing Candy Crush on his phone. ‘I was wondering if you could give me directions to…’ He suddenly couldn’t recall the name of Rick’s road. He had to remember it. If he didn’t, he had nowhere to stay tonight. ‘Bellevue Road,’ he said, relief washing through his body.
‘Don’t know it.’
Ed’s body sagged.
A tiny middle-aged woman emerged from behind the canned fruit. ‘Take a right at the traffic lights on to Maple Street. Follow that for about a mile and turn left when you get to the garage. Bellevue Road is the third on the left.’
‘Thank you,’ Ed said. He went to pick up a bottle of water but remembered he didn’t have a penny on him.
The temperature seemed to have dropped outside and he wished he had a warmer jacket. It was almost impossible to imagine that earlier that same day he and Emily had swum in the sea. Impossible for lots of reasons.
He was suddenly nervous about walking alone in the dark too. Streets that were almost identical to ones he had deemed beautiful earlier felt sinister, the quiet that was calm had become eerie. Ed’s heart raced and his eyes darted back and forth.
As he turned off the main drag, he became aware of footsteps behind him. He crossed the road and so did the footsteps. Ed’s mouth went dry. It couldn’t happen twice in one night, surely?
He couldn’t fight the rising panic though and, without thinking, found himself breaking into a run.
After what seemed like forever, he reached the low-slung, red-brick block where Rick lived. Ed doubted he had ever in his life been so keen to see his uncle.
‘You took your time,’ Rick said by way of a greeting. ‘Thought you weren’t coming.’
He showed Ed into a small dark living room that was dominated by a huge sagging couch. A true-crime documentary blasted from the TV and a plate with the congealed remnants of what looked like stew sat on a side table next to a half-drunk cup of tea.
Ed’s stomach rumbled and he realised he hadn’t eaten anything since the fish and chips at lunchtime.
‘You look older,’ Rick said.
Ed swiped his palm over his face. He’d like to attribute his uncle’s tactlessness to him being eighty-two, but the truth was he’d always been that way.
‘You’re in here,’ Rick said, leading him towards a box room with a single bed pushed into its corner. A wonky clothes horse covered in chewing-gum-coloured Y-fronts and brown and beige socks blocked the path from the door to the bed and there was no blind at the window.
Still, it was a lot better – not to mention safer – than sleeping on the streets.
The whole flat smelled of damp dog and Ed suddenly realised he hadn’t seen the pug. ‘How’s Him?’
‘Dead.’
‘I’m sorry,’ Ed said.
Rick shrugged his shoulders. ‘Happens.’
Ed felt a wave of sympathy. The dog had been smelly and yappy and had bitten several children, but his uncle had loved him – well, as much as he loved anything. Without Him, Rick must be very lonely.
Just like you’ll be when you’re old.
‘Bathroom’s down there on the right,’ Rick said. ‘Shower doesn’t work.’ He turned and headed back into the living room where he planted himself on the couch.
Ed sat down next to him. ‘I went to see Mum earlier.’ He suddenly realised he hadn’t managed to talk to Emily about his worries about Liz being scammed before she’d bundled him out of the door. He’d message her about it tomorrow.
The mention of his sister hadn’t dragged Rick’s eyes from the mug shots of serial killers on the TV.
‘She seemed well,’ Ed said.
Rick made a sort of grunting noise, although what it was supposed to convey was anyone’s guess.
‘Please may I use your cell… your mobile?’ Ed said. It was obvious that neither a cup of tea nor conversation were going to be forthcoming, so he may as well retreat to his room. It had been a long and emotional day.
And he still had one more soul-destroying task ahead.
Ed lay on the lumpy single bed holding Uncle Rick’s mobile phone. It had taken him a long time to convince the older man you can call America without it costing anything.
Now he just had to make himself dial the number.
Shona picked up almost immediately, her face registering shock when she saw it was Ed. ‘I don’t want to talk to you right now.’
Ed’s mind flashed back to Emily saying exactly the same thing. ‘Please don’t hang up.’
‘Why the hell not?’ Shona said. ‘Are you going to tell me some more lies? Refuse to say what you were doing on Monday afternoon or explain why you’re jumpy as a jitterbug recently or why you’re avoiding having sex with me. But then claim you’re not a cheat.’
‘Shona, I’m not cheating on you.’ He saw her hand move towards the red button. ‘Wait! Please, I can explain everything. That’s why I called.’
Shona stayed on the line. ‘Well, go on then, I’m waiting.’
Ed took a deep breath. He knew he had to do this. If he didn’t tell Shona the truth about their financial situation now, then tomorrow she’d find it out from the bank. Ed had to make sure that didn’t happen. He owed her that much at least. ‘So here’s the th—’
‘Wait,’ Shona said. ‘Whose cell are you calling me from and where in the hell are you? It doesn’t look like Emily’s place. Are you with some woman now? Are you cheating on me while you’re in England? I swear to God if you are, Edward, I’m going to ask Mary-Anne to cast a bad spell on you. She might be a white witch, but she can do bad spells as well, y’know. Oh, and I’m also going to shoot you right in the nuts the minute you set your cheatin’ ass back here.’
‘Shona,’ Ed said. ‘I’m staying at my Uncle Rick’s.’
‘I don’t believe you.’
Ed heaved himself off the bed, walked into the living room and turned the phone to face Rick on the sofa.
‘Doesn’t mean you weren’t cheating before,’ Shona said.
‘You’re making a video call?’ Rick said. ‘Don’t tell me that doesn’t cost anything.’
‘It’s called FaceTime,’ Ed said to his uncle. ‘And I promise you it’s free.’
‘Since when have your promises meant anything?’ Rick muttered.
Ed shut himself back in the bedroom. He stared at the contents of his rucksack spewed across the bed. Emily had packed the watches he’d left for her and Mark. The message was clear: we don’t want your presents or your presence. He looked at Shona and took a deep breath. ‘Okay, before I say anything else, I want you to know that I love you. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Really.’
‘Sounds like the kind of stuff a guy comes out with right before they tell you they’ve been cheating on you.’
Ed sighed. ‘I’m not cheating on you. But you’re right, I’ve been jumpy and distracted lately, and you are right that I didn’t miss yoga because of a migraine last Monday.’
Shona started to cry, and Ed felt as if his heart might cleave in two. How many more people he cared about was he going to destroy?
‘I’ve got myself into a bit of debt,’ he said. ‘Because of being out of work for a while and then the reselling business. The watches weren’t quite what I’d hoped they’d be, and the fancy dress costumes can’t be sold in the US—’
‘What?’ Shona said. ‘You told me you had a big order for them.’
‘I know. I’m sorry. The truth is the costumes don’t meet safety standards for fire retardancy. Some bulls—’ He stopped himself. No more excuses. ‘I should have checked it all out before I bought them. Anyway, that’s why I’ve been distracted and weird recently. Why I haven’t always been in the mood to have sex.’
‘How does that explain you lying to me on Monday afternoon?’
‘I went to visit a loan shark.’
‘A loan shark?’ Shona said, her voice cracking. ‘Oh, Ed. Everyone knows those fellas are bad news. You shouldn’t have done that. You should have talked to me. I don’t have the money to give you, we both know that, but together we could have worked something out.’
Ed felt sick. Shona was good and she loved him, and he absolutely should have told her the truth.
‘Maybe we could even have borrowed a bit more against the mortgage?’ she said.
The nausea tightened its grip.
‘I have done that.’ He could hardly bear to look at Shona. Her face was a mask of shock. ‘The next repayment is due tomorrow, but I don’t have the money to pay it. I thought I’d be able to get it in time, but I can’t. I’m so sorry.’
‘What happens if you don’t make the payment tomorrow?’ Shona said, her voice so small as to nearly be inaudible.
It was cold and damp in the box room, but Ed had started to sweat. He looked at the woman he loved and saw she was desperately trying to cling on to some shred of hope – some iota of belief in him and his ability to fix this.
‘We lose the condo.’