back to the bus.” I try to take her hand after she gets finished yelling at Landon and the girl next to him.
She yanks her hand away from me.
Crap.
Everyone in the room is watching, and Landon is shooting me his pathetic ‘please help me’ eyes.
“Oh, now you want to talk to me. Fuck off. Both of you.”
“Damnit, Austin. It looks like we need to have a talk.” I say.
So, when she turns to storm off, I do the first thing that comes to mind. I bring her back to me, which is pretty easy with her being drunk, and then I flip her over my shoulder and storm out of the backstage area towards my dressing room. I send up a silent prayer that she doesn’t puke all over me before I get there.
“What the hell are you doing? Put me down, asshole!” She starts beating on my back, and I smile even though, I know it would piss her off even more. She has some fire in her.
“I’ll set you down when we get to my dressing room. Looks like we need to have a chat.” I tell her.
“You have had a whole week to ‘have a chat,’ but no, you ignored me too, so fuck you. I want to go home. I’m done with this tour, and I’m done with both of you.” She starts pounding on my back again.
Oh yeah, we need to talk. There’s no way I’m letting her leave the tour early. Because I know if she goes home now, she will pack up and be gone, before we get home. Not an option.
“Too bad, because I’m not done with you,” I say, as I enter my dressing room and close the door behind me.
I put her down on her feet with her back to the door. Staring into her eyes, I reach past her and lock the door.
Then, in order to get my emotions under control, I turn my back to her for just a moment. Carrying her like that; having her so close, was such a turn on, even when she was yelling at me and cursing at me. After a few deep breaths, I can get my cock to go down enough that I can turn and face her again. She hasn’t moved one inch.
“You’ve been drinking, baby girl?” I ask her, even though, I already know she has. Making a note to myself to remember to say something to Ivy about not letting her drink like that. I know she’s her friend, but it could get her in serious trouble if the wrong person noticed and tried to take advantage of her.
“Yes, so what? Why do you even care?” I can hear the irritation in her voice, but there’s also underlying hurt.
I hated our show tonight. She wouldn’t look at me when we sang. She’d rather look out at the crowd, and that’s when I knew I was losing her. I hadn’t realized Landon had been avoiding her all week as well. I thought giving her space would let the two of them work things out. No wonder she’s all worked up and hurt.
“What was that outburst about?” I ask, keeping my voice soft because I don’t want to give her another reason to go off on me. Not until I have my answers.
“He thinks he has a say in my life and can drive you away, so why can’t I have a say in his life? Besides, I can’t stand that girl.”
Can’t blame her there. She tried to attach herself to me at the beginning of the tour, and when I told her to keep away, she latched on to Landon. That’s his business, and I figured he was using her for some fun, but she’s been around him at every stop. But that’s not the issue I need to address right now.
“Drive me away?” I ask her. I need to know what’s going through her head. I’ve given her space, yeah, but Landon hasn’t driven me away.
“You have avoided me all week. You’re out of the bus before I get up and come home late. You won’t talk to me or even look at me.”
Damn, I really thought she and Landon were working things out. I didn’t realize he has been avoiding her too, or I wouldn’t have stayed away, but I was never far away. I knew where she was, and what she was doing. I was always right here in case she needed me, like tonight.
I’ve spent the last week trying to get my life in order, so I can be the man she deserves. At some point, I will need her brother to be on board with this, and it’s going to take time. So, I want to lay the groundwork now and get everything in order, because staying away isn’t an option anymore. I plan to make her mine, but I want to do it the right way.
“I just need some time, baby girl. I need to make sure I do this right, and that I’m good for you. Will you give me some time?” I ask her, trying to beg her to understand with my eyes, but it doesn’t work.
She rolls her eyes “Getting some last action in?” She turns to try to leave, but I’m on her before her hand reaches the door.
I pin her to the door with my body and rest my arms on either side of her, caging her in.
“There’s no one but you. There hasn’t been anyone, since you’ve been back, and even a few months before that. There won’t be anyone but you. You got me?” I make it perfectly clear and lay it on the line for her.
With her being drunk, I know we will have to have another talk tomorrow, but I don’t want her going to bed and stewing on this making it into something it isn’t.
She looks up at me unsure, almost fearful to believe me, but I stay strong for us both. She’s scared and has been hurt before. I’m not backing down and plan to prove to her that I can be the man she needs.
Finally, her eyes drop, and she nods.
“Good, now let’s get you back to the bus, so you can sleep this off,” I tell her.
I pull my phone out and shoot a text off to Landon.
Me: Hey, I have Austin. I’m going to take her to the bus. Maybe wait an hour, before coming in? She’s still really mad at you, and I think it’s best to just let her get to sleep.
Landon: Okay. I’ll hang out here and do some damage control. I’ll talk to her in the morning.
Me: Go easy on her. She’s hurt, even if she went about it the wrong way. I’ll text you, once she’s asleep.
I put my phone back in my pocket and look back at Austin. She has been watching me with this questioning look on her face.
“You good to walk?” I ask her.
She just nods, but I put my arm around her waist anyway and head out to the bus with her. The security guy walks out with us, and then opens the bus door for me, while I help get her inside.
“Need help getting ready for bed?” I ask her.
She looks like she’s considering it before she shakes her head no and goes to her bunk.
Sitting on the couch gives me the best view of the bathroom door, and I wait for her to come out.
What a mess. It’s been hell this last week staying away from her, and it looks like it did no good. In fact, if anything, it made it all worse. It’s not like I enjoyed myself this week. I’ve spent the last week contacting the girls I used to just call up for a quickie any time I wanted. I didn’t owe them anything, but I wanted to end it and tell them I was seeing someone.
Austin deserves that, so no one thinks they have a claim on me but her. There were about eight different girls that I used to call, a few from our popular stops, and two more back in Nashville. Most of them didn’t care; a few asked me why I even bothered.
One seemed upset and said she had no problem being my side piece and could keep things under wraps. Sadly, she was also one of the ones in Nashville. I wasn’t so nice to her, making it very clear I wanted nothing more to do with her. She never seemed clingy or attached before, but she was also the one I’d take as a date if I needed to have one for a record event. I guess, she read too much into it.
It took me three days to call them all, and it really drained me. After that, I just felt dirty. Austin didn’t seem to care about my past, but at some point, we’d have to sit down and talk about it. It needs to happen before I ever get her to bed. If I ever get that chance.
When she comes out of the bathroom, she walks towards me.
“Can we cuddle just until I fall asleep? I’m still mad at you, but I missed you.” She asks as she looks down at her feet. Her voice is tiny, and she looks so vulnerable right now.
There’s no way I’d tell her no. Any time I can get with her, I’ll take. I won’t stay away anymore. Not if it hurts her like this.
“Of course,” I tell her and sit back on the couch. I grab the TV remote, put on one of the mountain men TV shows, and then lay down on the couch.
She grabs a blanket and lays down facing me and buries her face into my chest. I cover us both up with the blanket and tuck her head under my chin. I wrap one arm under her and run my hand through her hair. I know this is the easiest way to calm her. It always has been, since we were kids. I rest my other hand on her hip and hold her close.
No words are spoken; we just lay there, soaking each other in. Being this close to her is making my cock hard, and I don’t try to hide it. I want her to know what she does to me. Though, I won’t let anything happen tonight, not while she has been drinking. I hope tomorrow in the light of day she still wants to give us a chance. If it’s the last thing I do, I’ll make this up to her.
Austin relaxes in my arms and her breathing gets even, so I know she’s asleep, but I still lie there and soak her in. My phone goes off in my pocket, and I carefully pull it out without waking her.
Landon: You guys make it to the bus okay? She still mad?
Me: We made it. She’s almost asleep and seems to have calmed down. I think she’s more hurt than anything. I pulled back because I wanted you guys to work it out, but I hadn’t realized you pulled back, too.
Landon: Shit. So, now she thinks we both have been ignoring her all week?
Me: Pretty much.
Landon doesn’t know about the real reason I pulled back. He doesn’t know about me calling the girls and ending it, and my plans to move forward with Austin. I’ve thought about this a lot, and I think the best thing I can do is prove to him how well I will treat her by actually doing it. He might get mad at first, but when he sees it with his own eyes, I’m sure he will come around.
Me: Listen, I’ll get up early and leave you two to have the bus tomorrow, so you can work it out. Then, I’ll talk to her later in the afternoon. We’ll make this right. We have to, or if she goes home early, you know she won’t be there when we get back.
Landon: Yeah, that’s not happening. We’ll fix this.
I wait a few more minutes and enjoy her cuddles and her being pressed against me before I carry her to her bunk and tuck her in. She snuggles right into her bed and looks so peaceful. I kiss her forehead, and then send Landon a quick text that she’s asleep.
I will fix this because losing her now that I’ve decided to make her mine just isn’t an option.