The four of them sat in the snack aisle. They were stuck. The cashiers had vanished into the darkness, not even leaving cashier-shaped holes in the glass doors for them to escape through. They couldn’t leave until the power came back on. But sitting here, in the dark, made the lost time all she could think about.
“It’s weird,” Tiny said, to distract herself. “Being back together again. The founding members of Science Club. Did you guys ever think this would happen?”
“Ha,” said Lu. “No.”
“Me neither,” said Nathaniel.
“If the soccer guys could see me now,” Will said. “Hipster hair and skinny jeans and hanging out with a bunch of misfits in a Kmart in the middle of the night.”
“Is that how you think of us, Will?” Lu asked. “Just a bunch of misfits? Is that why you abandoned us?”
“I abandoned you?” Will looked genuinely shocked. “I abandoned you?”
Lu just looked at him pointedly.
“You’re the one who’s gotten all judgy,” he said.
“Judgy!”
“Yeah, with your weird slogan T-shirts and big boots and eyeliner and crazy theater friends. Dating a delinquent musician who probably broke a hundred laws tonight by putting on that show. Do you think he had a permit for those generators? No. And do you think those fires would have started without the generators? No!”
“What about that makes me judgy? If anyone’s being judgy here, Will, it’s you.”
“This is ridiculous,” Nathaniel said. “I know why we grew apart. It’s because we’re all too self-absorbed to see what anyone else is going through. No one’s even asked me how I’m doing. Do you think it’s been easy for me tonight? After everything that happened with my brother, and now having some kind of weird superpower that’s basically turning me into him? Do you guys even know what kind of pressure I’m under? You think my parents will expect anything less than perfection after raising a son like Tobias first?” He paused. “Do you think I’ll expect anything less?”
“Nathaniel,” Will said. But he left the word hanging there without finishing the sentence.
“Right. You were too busy thinking about pizza and soccer and Lu and your hair.”
“Lu?” said Lu.
“You say you’re not happy with who you are. You say you want to be someone different. But who you look like is only a start; you have to change on the inside, too, Will.”
“Lu?” Lu said again. “You were thinking about me?”
“So not the time, Lu,” said Will.
Tiny realized she was guilty of it too. They all were. She let how other people saw her rule her life. First Tobias. Now Josh. The lit mag committee. Her parents and Lu and her teachers. All the things people said to her every day that made her feel not good enough or special enough or pretty enough or talented enough. It wore you down after a while.
You started to believe them.
“Wow,” Lu was saying. “I feel like I’m learning a lot about boy friendships tonight.”
“That’s not funny,” said Will.
“We don’t make fun of your friendships,” Nathaniel said.
“That’s because our friendship is perfect,” said Lu.
Before tonight Tiny would never have said anything. But now—
“Stop,” she said. “Just stop.”
Lu spun around.
“Sorry, what?”
Tiny turned red. “Lu. Our friendship is not perfect. We aren’t best friends. We’re just two people who coexist near each other more often than other people.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Best friends actually talk about things! Real things! They tell each other the truth!”
Lu’s mouth fell open.
“And, Will, no one cares about your hair or your skinny jeans. In fact, no one cares what you look like at all.”
“Hey!” Will sat up straighter.
“Nathaniel,” Tiny said. “If you don’t want to be like your brother, don’t be like your brother. And if you do, then do it, and be even better than he was. It’s up to you.”
“Wow,” said Nathaniel. “Don’t sugarcoat it.”
Tiny felt a weird, familiar feeling. Energy buzzing around inside her, needing to burst out. Her hands started to shake, and she balled them into fists at her sides.
“And I never stand up for myself. I never say what I really think or feel. I’m afraid to be myself. So now I’m going to be myself. And maybe if I do, I’ll stop disappearing.”
She started off down the aisle.
The floor began to hum, and then the walls began to vibrate, and then the lights zapped back on throughout the store. She squinted against the harsh fluorescence.
It was like the lightning knew. Like it could hear her.
“Whoa,” Lu said, running after her. “What just happened?”
“Did she make the power turn back on?” Nathaniel was running after them too.
“Guys,” said Will. “Where are you going? The door is that way. We can leave now!”
But Tiny was already walking away.