JOHN KOETHE


The Age of Anxiety

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       isn’t an historical age,

But an individual one, an age to be repeated

Constantly through history. It could be any age

When the self-absorbing practicalities of life

Are overwhelmed by a sense of its contingency,

A feeling that the solid body of this world

Might suddenly dissolve and leave the simple soul

That’s not a soul detached from tense and circumstance,

From anything it might recognize as home.

I like to think that it’s behind me now, that at my age

Life assumes a settled tone as it explains itself

To no one in particular, to everyone. I like to think

That of those “gifts reserved for age,” the least

Is understanding and the last a premonition of the

Limits of the poem that’s never done, the poem

Everyone writes in the end. I see myself on a stage,

Declaiming, as the golden hour wanes, my long apology

For all the wasted time I’m pleased to call my life—

A complacent, measured speech that suddenly turns

Fretful as the lights come up to show an empty theater

Where I stand halting and alone. I rehearse these things

Because I want to and I can. I know they’re quaint,

And that they’ve all been heard before. I write them

Down against the day when the words in my mouth

Turn empty, and the trap door opens on the page.

from Raritan