10 WAYS TO GET RAY CHARLES AND RONALD REAGAN INTO THE SAME POEM
1.
Begin with the rhythm of chapped hands traversing
the naked hips of a Raelette. Begin with the whispered
boundaries of a gone world. Forced to craft other English,
men stutter with their surfaces, jump when they touch
something raw. At birth, the cottony light of the real grew
faint until music swelled its arcing arms and claimed him.
At the very second of heaven, a history swerved close,
teased, but did not return. He said good-bye to strangers.
2.
What heaven would have him, ashed, so much of hollow,
now irritably whole? Imagine the gasping and gulping, the
sputtered queries at the sight of sunflowers and foil. There’s
a holy niche in hell for these harbingers of hard wisdoms,
men with this strain of jazz in them, men who have seen the
inward of women, heard colors settle, eased shameful things
into their mouths. The Last Rapture is best without his kind,
without his crazed seeing knock splintering the gilded wood.
3.
Which is the kill that repeats: To lose what you have seen, or
never to see what you have already lost? And the ears become
earth drums, huge hands, vessels. They rush to scream him
everything, including dust, cerulean, the moist blinking of a
woman’s hip. Even touch gets loud, shocking his long fingers,
jolting him upright in the damnable dark. His days become
his skin, blank and patient. Even when bellowed, many words,
like today and never, translate to nothing truly seen or known.
4.
Sudden mothers, lying clocks, warm canes. Women are
everywhere. He has buckled beneath their gazing, knowing
how truly they see him, straining erect, eyes bop-do-ditty in
a bobbing head. He allows them their pity strolls across his
map while he moves his palms up and down, flat against their
waiting faces, reading, reading. They stink so good, and he is
amazed at their talent for tangling the recalled. But they talk
too damned much. All those split declaratives deny his eyes.
5.
The politics of smooth and unpuckered, the sounds of a man
reciting what he will never know. What separates the living of
this from the dying of it, it is all that no-color, that hugest of
sound, the din, fingertips swollen from touching everything
twice, the dim wattage of time crawling beyond where it was.
Faces, angle and ghost, rise up to him, dance their mean
little circumstance dance, claim the simplest drifting names.
Slamming all his eyes against them only carves the hard loss.
6.
Promise drips from songs, but the heart can’t see anything.
7.
The body, snide prankster, won’t stop. Tumbling through sheets
leaves a bright sting. The right music ignites even the flattest ass.
Damned toes tap. Anything on the tongue must be swallowed or
expelled. The gut fills, piss trickles. Eyes flap open, even though.
The elbow cranks, the cock stiffens, roots of thirst and addictions
thicken. The sun bakes blank recollection on open skin. Inside him
a wretched world spins, machine unerring, striving for such a silly
perfect. The body doesn’t need moonwash or windows. It just churns.
8.
His pulse has the gall to beat urgently, like it does when one spies
a familiar canvas or a lostago sweet. It’s as if one of his strangers
has dangled life’s pointed, two-pronged instruction just inside the
void: Remember what you have seen. See what you remember. He
spends his days straining toward either or both of these squiggling
concepts, building whole novels on a hint of ginger riding someone’s
breath. In the end, almost buried by his sad collage, he clings to a
single truth: Whenever he asks for water, it arrives. It always arrives.
9.
When a gone man dies, what could possibly be taken away? It must
be the light that leaves, darkening even places it has never touched.
10.
Salvation blesses him with gasping eyes, pinned open and glaring,
and hours that slide like silver over his skin. The first thing he sees
is everything. His whole life hurtles past, paining him with its
scarlets and excess, the pulsing soundtrack a sweet irritant. The
first thing he sees is all of it, the interminable meetings, the mercy
fucks, a sweaty tumbler of ice water, finally his own knees. Eternity
is this looped, unblinking cinema of himself. Paradise is crammed
with the cruelly blessed struck dumb by scenes too loud to live.