How was I supposed to know the twitchy squirrel was going to faint? I mean, sure, sometimes I chase him around the yard. Big deal. You’d do the same thing if you were a dog. Especially if you were bored out of your mind and had nothing to read. So yeah, the squirrel took one look at my mug and fainted.
Like I mentioned, it’s my job to keep the Chicken Squad and their mom, Moosh, safe and sound. I saw the squirrel walking into the chicken coop that afternoon, and I wouldn’t be doing my job if I didn’t check it out. Moosh saw it too. She wouldn’t be doing her job if she didn’t check it out either. But Moosh and I have both been around long enough to know that squirrels are never up to anything good.
“Now look what you did, J. J.,” said Sugar, frowning at the squirrel stretched out on the floor. She did not look pleased. Poppy and Sweetie jumped out of the shoe to get a closer look.
“It’s so soft!” said Sweetie. “Can we keep it?”
“Dead squirrels are boring,” said Poppy. “I’ll be in the shoe if you need me.”
Moosh burst into the coop, looked down at the squirrel, and rolled her eyes.
“I’ll handle it,” she said.
So there was only one thing left for me to do: go back to sleep.