This was wrong. She was so right. They were supposed to be resisting these urges to kiss, and instead he’d jumped right into the feelings.
He stopped kissing her and leaned his forehead against hers. “I’m sorry. You’re right. You’d think I was the one who’d had wine instead of iced tea. All I can say is that you make me tipsy.”
“Oh, that’s so sweet.”
“There you go again, calling me sweet. As I see things, I’m the guy who’s trying to seduce you in a restaurant parking lot in broad daylight.”
“You’re trying to seduce me?”
“Oh, never mind. You don’t have a bit of self-preservation. I have to be strong for both of us.”
“I think that would be a very good idea,” she agreed.
He took her arm and steered her toward the truck. “We’re going back home—our individual homes—before I do something very unprofessional.”
“Another good idea,” she said, suddenly sounding much more sober. “As soon as we get back to reality, this attraction thing will go away.”
“Right.” He helped her into the passenger side and thought to himself, wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong. That’s what his desire for Kate was. This crazy attraction wasn’t going away. He’d just have to control it, because they had one more week before he had to be ready for Brittany.
He didn’t have time to get involved with any woman…and especially not someone like Kate, whom he couldn’t walk away from after a couple of nights. Kate didn’t have any experience with meaningless flings. He wasn’t going to enlighten her on how to love ’em and leave ’em.
BY THE TIME Luke pulled into the driveway by her garage apartment, Kate’s headache had begun and her mortification was complete. She’d made a complete fool of herself in the parking lot of the restaurant. Right in public! What had she been thinking?
Nothing. That was the problem. She’d only been feeling, letting her emotions get the better of her due to one glass of wine. One! She couldn’t really blame it all on the alcohol. She had a deep and abiding weakness where Luke Simon was concerned.
She had ever since he’d ridden into town that day. She’d never been attracted to tall, dark and dangerous men. Maybe she should have dated a few before she married the seemingly perfect man. Maybe she was spreading her wings after years of a bland marriage. Perhaps Ed’s disinterest in her, his disrespect for their marriage, had made her see life—and men—differently. Maybe.
“Are you okay?” Luke asked as he turned off the engine.
She nodded as she sat there in the early evening, with the sunlight filtering through the hackberry and cottonwood trees and fluttering around the dashboard of the truck like demented moths. “I’m fine. I’ll just go get Eddie and…I have lots to do.”
“Will I see you tomorrow?”
She looked up at Luke. “Of course.”
“I wasn’t sure. You’ve been awfully quiet after…”
“I’m sorry about that.” She shook her head. “I don’t know why I keep…well, acting inappropriately. You must think I’m some kind of desperate divorcée who throws herself at men.”
“You didn’t throw yourself at me. You just flirted a little. Let’s blame it on the wine and try to forget it.”
“Do you think we can?”
“I definitely think we should.”
“Okay, then.” If he could, so could she. She hoped.
He smoothed a strand of hair back from her cheek. “Maybe you should get a good night’s sleep, take a day off tomorrow and we’ll begin over again on Monday.”
His touch felt so good, so right. She wanted to lean into his hand and stay there forever. She jerked upright. No, she didn’t. She wanted to be independent, to start her life over with a new career. “Yes. That sounds good. Everything will be back to normal Monday.”
“Right,” he said as he reached for the steering wheel.
“Okay, then. Thanks for the dinner. I think Brittany will love the furniture, and I’ll see you on Monday.”
Luke nodded and sat there, staring out the wind-shield and not at her as she opened the door and hurried toward her brother’s house.
Travis met her at the back door, Marsha in his arms. Kate smiled at the baby and gave her loud kisses on the cheek, making Marsha giggle. Eddie had to be watching television; she heard the set on in the family room.
“That was interesting,” Travis said with a frown as she slipped through the door and walked toward the family room.
“This isn’t a good time to pick a fight,” she said.
“I’m just curious about this professional relationship you claim to have with a man who makes all those emotions flash across your face.”
“You shouldn’t be spying on me,” she replied in a low voice so Eddie wouldn’t hear as she turned to confront her brother. “And you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I know what I saw. Is he putting pressure on you to do anything you don’t want to do?”
“Of course not! He was a perfect gentleman.” She’d been the instigator.
“I just want you to be careful. You haven’t dated since Ed—”
“No, and I’m not dating now.” She stood a little straighter and continued talking before Travis could say anything else. “I’m sorry I was gone so long. We had a lot of shopping to do. We had to go all the way to the north side of San Antonio to find the furniture we needed, then to the outlet mall, and by then we were both hungry.”
“Gee, sounds like you two are setting up housekeeping.”
She threw up her hands in desperation. “That’s ridiculous. I’m taking my son home now.”
Travis sighed. “Just listen. Sometimes when you look at Luke or talk about him, it’s like back when you didn’t know why guys wanted to get you alone in their cars.”
That stopped her. “It is not!”
“Yeah, it is, and it kind of scares me.”
It scares me too, Kate thought as she hurried toward her son. But like Luke had said, they’d forget about it and focus on their other relationship. The one that wasn’t a minefield of painful repercussions.
ON MONDAY Luke was visited by a child-welfare official who reviewed his home, the renovation almost finished, and listened to him explain his plans for himself, his ranch and Brittany. He had to have said the right things, because the woman was smiling when she left and said she’d forward a copy of her report to the Florida court.
He breathed a sigh of relief when her sedan pulled across the cattle guard onto the road.
“How did it go?” Kate asked, coming through the front door. She watched the departing car also.
“Fine, I guess. She was friendly.”
“Hmm. She probably enjoyed spending time with you.”
Luke frowned. “What does that mean?”
Kate took a deep breath. “Never mind.”
“You’re jealous!”
“I most certainly am not!” She turned and went back into the house. “I simply made an observation. Now I’m going to get back to sorting these books for Brittany. As soon as the furniture gets here, we need to get it in place and add the accessories Robin picked out.”
He followed her into the newly painted bedroom that Brittany would inhabit in just about a week. “Do you think we made the right choice? White furniture doesn’t seem too practical for a kid.”
“On the contrary, the furniture is cream, not white, and if she does get it dirty, you can see the smudges and clean them. Or have her help you clean it. Dirt doesn’t show up as much on natural or stained wood, so really, it can become much more dirty.”
“Okay, but what about the whole ocean theme? I was thinking something more to do with animals.”
“You mean mammals, and that’s your passion, not necessarily hers. Robin and I both agree that the ocean theme will make her less homesick for Florida.”
“I don’t even know if she likes all those fish the artist is going to paint on the walls,” he said as he looked at the ocean-blue paint above a sandy-tan color at the bottom of the wall.
“She’ll love the total look. There will be fish and dolphins cavorting through this ocean, and seashells and starfish and other creatures on the sandy bottom.”
“Still, maybe we should have gone with the circus idea.”
“Not all children like circuses. You’re projecting.”
“Projecting?”
“And worrying.”
He frowned. “Maybe. I want the room to be perfect.”
Kate placed her hands on her hips and faced him. “Tell me this. What are you going to do if she doesn’t like it?”
He thought for only a moment. “Offer to change it?”
“Right. So besides the expense of hiring the mural painter and buying the bedspread and curtains, there won’t be a problem.”
“I suppose. But I want her to love her new room.”
Kate took him by the arms and looked into his eyes, her expression serious and determined. “No, you want Brittany to love her new dad. And she will. Believe me, she will.”
Kate was right. He did want his daughter to love him. He’d never wanted someone’s love before. He’d always been sure of his mother’s love. His father—well, he’d been just as sure of the bastard’s disinterest, until it was too late. However, the uncertainty of Brittany’s feelings made him wish all this was over and everything was perfect and he could get on with life, everyone happy and healthy.
“You’re going to be a great father.”
He wished he could be as certain as Kate.
KATE HAD FELT the tension escalate all week as the furniture was put in place, the accessories added, the kitchen put in order and the mural completed just in time.
Brittany would be here tomorrow afternoon.
Kate had left Luke’s ranch to pick up Eddie from school. They went to Robin’s Nest to get a welcome gift for Brittany, then stopped for fast food before going home. Even Eddie seemed excited, but tired. She hoped he’d sleep well tonight because she was exhausted.
Or maybe she wasn’t so much physically exhausted as she was tense with anticipation. Despite all her efforts and assurances, Luke still had doubts. Personally, she thought he was doing great, but it was impossible to convince someone that he was competent, had excellent instincts and would succeed beyond his expectations.
As Eddie watched one of his favorite shows on television, Kate relaxed in a tub filled with warm water and vanilla-scented bubbles. With any luck, she could get to bed right after Eddie. She closed her eyes and thought about the past two weeks. Luke was such a nice man. Even when he was worried sick and faced with unfamiliar obstacles, he kept his patience. He didn’t rant and rave, or get moody or surly. And despite their ill-advised kisses, he hadn’t taken advantage of her weakness for him.
So, she thought as she eased deeper into the water, to recap: Luke was determined, patient, even-tempered, noble and, most of all, a fantastic kisser.
Her eyes snapped open. No, that’s not what she was supposed to be thinking! She was such a confused mass of memories and emotions.
After tomorrow, when Brittany was safely here and Luke could relax, things would return to normal. She’d enjoy spring break with her son, go back to substitute teaching and only see Luke around town or if Eddie got a wild urge to visit the animals. Maybe they could arrange some play time for Brittany and Eddie, if the children got along. It was hard to say because a two-year age difference was huge when kids were six and eight.
Two years wasn’t such a big age difference when the people were thirty and thirty-two. Not that she should be thinking about that, either.
The water started to cool, so she shaved her legs quickly and finished scrubbing with the exfoliating puff Jodie insisted she use daily. Her sister-in-law was a fount of information about beauty and skin care, some of which actually seemed practical, and not just for women interested in attracting men. Which Kate wasn’t. At least not in the near future.
She and Eddie shared a couple of shortbread cookies and two glasses of milk before his bedtime. Dressed in her soft cotton short pajamas, she was already getting sleepy when the phone rang.
“Hello.”
She heard the barely controlled panic in his voice. “What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know. Everything. Maybe nothing. I’m just not sure I’m ready for this.”
“You’re ready. You’re doing great.”
“That’s easy for you to say. Brittany isn’t going to be judging you.”
“Judging? No, that’s not what she’s going to do.”
“How can you be sure?”
Kate had a feeling this conversation was only going to get more intense. She couldn’t reassure him over the phone. He was stressed out, understandably, and needed her.
But she shouldn’t see him now, especially since it was night and they never saw each other except in broad daylight.
“Luke, you’re going to be a great father. Remember how well you’ve interacted with Eddie? How I’ve mentioned you have great instincts?”
“That’s fine, but I already know Eddie. And Brittany is a girl, someone I’ve mostly just talked to on the phone.” Kate’s heart went out to him because she knew how much he cared. She wished Eddie’s father cared half as much as Luke about relating to his child.
“Kate, I’m really worried.”
“I know, but—”
“Mommy, who is it?” Eddie asked, rubbing his eyes.
She asked Luke to wait a minute, put her hand over the phone and said to her son, “It’s Luke, sweetie. You know how I’ve been helping him? Well,” she said, taking a deep breath, “he needs me one more time before his daughter gets here tomorrow.”
“Oh.”
“I’ll be with you in just a minute, Eddie.” He walked off to finish his cookie and she returned to the phone. “Luke, I’m going to be over there shortly. I have to take Eddie to Travis and Jodie.”
“No, Kate, it’s too late for you to come out.”
“Don’t be silly. It’s not even nine o’clock, and you obviously need to talk. I’ll be right over. Leave the porch light on for me, okay.”
“Okay. And Kate? Thanks.”
He disconnected the call and she rushed to the bedroom. She pulled on underwear, jeans and a clean T-shirt, then went back into the kitchen. She had no idea how long Luke needed to talk and she wasn’t willing to drag her son out of bed in the middle of the night if it wasn’t necessary.
“Eddie, I’m going to ask Travis and Jodie if you can go to sleep at their house tonight, okay?”
“Okay. Can I sleep there all night? Uncle Travis fixes blueberry pancakes on Sunday morning.”
“Yes, he does. I’ll call him and make sure it’s okay for you to come over.”
Within a few minutes, she’d put Eddie’s things together and walked him over to the main house. Jodie was back home and they were glad to have Eddie spend the night. Travis did, however, give her a look that showed his disapproval of her running off to the neighbor’s.
“I’ll see you in the morning,” she told her brother and sister-in-law. Eddie was already upstairs, checking on baby Marsha. Kate hurried off before Travis could quiz her.
The night was clear and pleasant as she drove around to Luke’s ranch. Although she could walk—or chase Eddie—through the pasture in just minutes, the drive took longer as the road wrapped around Travis’s acreage, then Luke’s property. Long enough for her to give herself a lecture about this visit. “You will be professional but supportive,” she said as her little sedan crept along the dark driveway. “You haven’t had any wine, so there’s no excuse for a repeat of that embarrassing scene in the restaurant parking lot.”
Even though she’d had a hard time forgetting their last kiss.
Her heart seemed to beat a little faster as she neared the house. Was he regretting the phone call? Was he looking forward to seeing her again? Doubtful. Mostly, he was worried, as any new father might be. He needed her wisdom, albeit limited, about children, and nothing else.
The porch light and the outdoor floodlight at the barn were on, welcoming her. She turned off the car engine and walked to the front door, just as she’d done for the past two weeks.
Only tonight felt different.
“You came,” he said from the shadows of the doorway.
“I told you I would.”
“I know, but it’s not always easy to get away when you have a child, right?”
“That’s true. One of the perks of living with your brother, however, is a built-in babysitter.”
“That’s one thing good about your brother.”
She walked up to Luke. “Do you think you two will ever get along?”
“As in friends? Doubtful.”
“Why?”
“I think it’s obvious.”
“Me?”
“What else? We don’t exactly socialize.”
“No, but you know some of the same people. Hank, for instance. He’s Travis’s best friend, and he’s the reason you chose Ranger Springs when you were looking for land.”
“True, and if I’m ever in the situation where Travis and I are at the same party at Hank’s house, I’ll be on my best behavior.”
“But you won’t like it.”
“Hey, no offense, but your brother glares at me whenever he’s within spitting distance.”
“Crudely put, but effective.”
Luke ran a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be crude.”
“That’s okay. I know you’re anxious and frustrated and just venting.”
He smiled slightly. “Is that what I’m doing?”
“In my professional opinion, yes,” she replied with a smile.
“You know, I think you just told me I’m having a hissy fit.”
Kate laughed. “Where did you hear that term?”
“My mother used to say that a lot.” He looked far into the night. “I’m really sorry she didn’t live long enough to know about Brittany. She would have loved a grandchild.”
“I’m sure she knew you’d get married someday and have children.”
Luke shrugged. “Probably. I sure wasn’t showing much promise in that area nine years ago.”
“You were still awfully young then.”
“Sometimes I don’t think I’ve learned all that much about relationships and women since then.”
“You have learned about relationships—with your daughter, I mean. I’m sure of it.” She hoped she’d learned something from her own experiences lately—something that would keep her from thinking about kissing Luke again.
Luke looked at her as though he sensed her inner turmoil. “Come on inside and talk to me some more.”