Now let’s talk about your “hunting gear” for finding a special someone. No way is it “unisex” clothing!
Women, because you like a man dressed in good quality clothes, you might think he’ll admire your new designer pantsuit. Probably not. A man is more attracted by a sexy outfit.
Men, because you like sexy clothes on women, you may think she’ll be turned on by your sleeveless shirt and tight jeans. Probably not. Most women prefer quality material, color coordination, and a good fit.
This is not just speculation. A study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior proved that the particular clothes a woman wore were practically meaningless to a man as long as she looked desirable. Conversely, women were much more attracted to men who wore high-quality, coordinated clothes.53
I hope that by now you have both packed away your dreary clothing and are donning more attention-getting and attractive clothing every day. (If not, go back to ShyBuster #35, “Chuck the Dull Duds.” When you get into the more conspicuous clothing habit, come back here and continue “dressing for finding love.”)
Women, most men can’t tell your top designer gown from a Target fire sale—and they could care less. But instinctively and instantaneously they spot skin—a little cleavage here, a little more leg there.
Naturally, you don’t want to look like a lady of the night, so you must plan some very subtle sexy revelations. Wear, say, a conservative jacket but with a scanty blouse underneath. When the jacket “accidentally” comes unbuttoned across the room or across the table, it “accidentally” reveals, ahem, a couple of your assets.
Ditto with an appropriate-length skirt. No one can blame you if it happens to ride up a tad higher on your legs when you spot a nice gentleman.
Please don’t misunderstand me. I’m not suggesting that you do anything shameless, just a little tantalizing.
At first, drawing this type of attention to yourself may be agonizing. But it has manifold benefits. It’s not only for enticing men. It helps you gain more appreciation of your own body.
Generally, no. You might think a woman is attracted by your revealing clothes. Not usually. Pack away those sleeveless shirts and bun-hugging jeans when you’re looking for love.
A woman is very particular when it comes to your clothing. My seminar participants are always surprised when I tell them that studies prove that the clothes a man wears are more important to a woman than vice versa.54
“Why,” you might ask, “does a woman care so much about what I’m wearing?” Because, gentlemen, it is in her genes.
“Her what?”
Her genes—meaning that instinctively she wants to know that you could take care of her and her unborn children. It is subconscious, of course, but coordinated clothes show that you are discerning and careful. Quality fabrics reveal that you probably have the means to do so.