44

Meabh’s confrontation with her mother reminded Noelie that he needed to see his sister. A lot had happened since he had last spoken to her. She would’ve heard about Church Bay and would know that what had happened there involved him. He needed to explain.

Meabh offered to accompany him but he felt it would be better if he went on his own.

‘We’re still in danger,’ she reminded him. ‘I know you have to go but come straight back to the hotel when you’re done.’

Noelie said he would.

His brother-in-law answered the door. He made no comment about Noelie’s appearance or about what had been in the news. He didn’t ask him in, simply called loudly to Ellen that her brother was at the door and walked away. Noelie wondered how Arthur was coping with Shane’s death. Maybe it was easier for him to stay angry with Noelie.

Ellen came along the hall. Noelie thought she looked a little better.

‘Jesus,’ she said. ‘What happened to you? Come in.’

They went into the room immediately inside the front door. It was one of Noelie’s favourites, bright with a high ceiling and a wide bay window. He sat on the edge of the sofa. At first Ellen stood then she sat too.

‘I heard about Hannah. I’m so sorry.’

He met his sister’s eyes. He saw her hesitate and then come over. He stood and she held him.

‘She was such a lovely person and I know how close you were.’

Noelie nodded, struggling to maintain his composure. He put his head on Ellen’s shoulder and she didn’t move away; Ellen knew better than anyone how far back Noelie and Hannah went.

‘Thank you,’ he said.

‘They said she was murdered.’

‘Yes.’

Ellen grimaced and shook her head. Noelie sat again. ‘I owe you an explanation. I want to tell you everything.’

He began at the beginning: finding the records, discovering the statement and the allegations about Jim Dalton’s murder, and becoming entangled with Inspector Lynch and Special Branch. It took him nearly half an hour. When he finished, his sister stayed silent for a while.

‘When I heard about the bomb in your flat, just after we argued, I knew then that whatever you had got involved in was a lot worse than anything I had imagined. I don’t know where I got the idea but I thought you were involved in something to do with drugs or money-lenders or I don’t know what.’ Ellen paused. ‘Byrne had told us a bit about the mole in the IRA story and how she had looked into that in relation to Shane’s disappearance. I sort of came to my senses with the news of that bomb. I put two and two together, I suppose. Look, it’s no excuse, but things like that are far removed from everyday life, from my life, I mean. I didn’t realise it was so serious. Now I’m just glad you’re safe.’

She continued, ‘We’re different, Noelie, and we need to accept that about each other. I need to accept it about you but you need to accept it about me too.’

Noelie nodded. He agreed. They had always been going in different directions. Ellen had never been interested in politics or history or anything like that; she couldn’t get out of school fast enough. Noelie was the opposite.

Ellen wasn’t finished. ‘Part of the problem, a big part, has to do with what’s gone on between you and Arthur. He’s my husband and you’re my only brother. Neither of you think about me in the middle. I need you to make an effort, Noelie – especially now. He’s a good man, he’s very kind, and I love him. What’s happened has broken him, it really has.’

Noelie nodded again. Maybe it was the impact of the grief that he was feeling but he didn’t want to cause anyone any more pain. He needed Ellen. If he was going to make that work, he had to get on better with Arthur.

‘I’m sorry.’ Hesitating, he added, ‘I want to sort this out. I know it will take time, I understand that, but you’re all the family I’ve got.’

Ellen nodded.

‘Would you come to Hannah’s funeral?’ he asked. ‘We don’t know when it will be yet, there’s an issue with the police investigation, but it would mean a lot to me.’

‘Of course.’

He stood and they hugged once more.

‘I miss Shane, Ellen. Coming here, knowing that he’s not around any more. It’s … I’m so sorry.’

‘I know that.’