Going home wasn’t easy. The trip itself was easy enough, what with Lacey letting me use her personal transport, but thinking about having to face my mother made my stomach churn. Nothing could prepare me for that. But there was no use putting it off—well, putting it off too long.
“You’re back!” Genevieve ran up to me as soon as I stepped inside the palace. “You were gone so long.”
I gave her a big hug. “Glad you missed me.”
“Of course I missed you!” She pulled away from the hug. “And what did you bring me?”
“What makes you think I brought you anything?” I teased.
“You always bring me something. Always.”
“I may have brought you one little thing.” I patted my shoulder bag. “Come up to my room with me.”
I walked through the cold halls of the palace. That was the worst part of coming back from Lacey’s. The letdown of having to accept the white cold rather than the warm colors of Spring Court was always jarring.
Genevieve followed along behind me as I made my way up the twisting staircases toward the wing of the palace I shared with my sister.
“How is Lacey?” She asked. “Did you have fun?”
“She’s doing well. Same as always, I guess. And I did. It was overall relaxing.”
“What did you do?”
“Mostly swam and slept.”
“Oh, come on. You must have done more.”
“Not too much. We went out to the inn a few times. I don’t know what else you think we could have done.”
“I knew you went out.”
We reached my room, and I set down my bag. I pulled out Genevieve’s gift, all wrapped up in pale pink paper.
She unwrapped it immediately, letting the paper fall to reveal the cloth. “Oh, it’s gorgeous!” She held the lavender dress to her chest. “So beautiful.”
“It looked like you.”
Her face fell. “Mother will never let me wear it out though. It doesn’t suit our winter palette, does it?”
“It doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy wearing it in here.” I saw so much of myself in her expression. In her disappointment. Sure, there were many good things about living in Winter Court. We were strong and fierce, and there is a beauty to the cold, but I’d always longed for more color. More warmth.
“You’re right. Thank you. It was such a thoughtful gift.” Genevieve beamed.
“I also got you this.” I pulled out a satchel from my bag.
“Crystal candies!” Her face lit up again when she looked inside. “The pink and yellow kinds. My favorite.”
“Really? I didn’t know that.”
“Of course you did.” She pulled me into another hug. “You are the best big sister ever.”
“Maybe not the best. I did leave you for a month.”
“I understand. I’d do the same thing if I were allowed.”
“But I'm here to stay for a while. I promise.” I needed to be a better sister. I’d sworn to myself I’d protect her. I wouldn’t let my mother change her. Ruin her. I had to stop with my selfish quests.
“You can’t promise that.” Her hands fell to her sides.
“Why not?”
“Oh.” She paled. “No reason.”
“Come on.” I knew my sister, and I knew she was hiding something. “What aren’t you telling me?”
“Nothing. Nothing at all.”
I pulled the satchel from her hands. “No more crystal candies until you answer me.”
She sighed loudly. “That’s not fair. I want to tell you, but I can’t. I’ll get in a lot of trouble.”
“With who?”
She looked away. “With mother.”
I wasn’t sure why I even asked. Of course it was my mother. “What’s going on? You have to tell me.”
“She’ll kill me.” Genevieve shivered. Sometimes I truly hated my mother. She meant well in her own way a good deal of the time, but even when she did mean well, she could be terrifying.
“She won’t because she’ll never know.” I’d protect Genevieve in any way I could. One way to do it was to be very, very careful.
“You can’t promise that.”
“Sure I can. You know how much I love you. I’d never want to get you in trouble.”
She closed my door. “I don’t like hiding things from you.”
“Nor should you. We’re sisters. We’re supposed to tell each other everything.”
“You don’t tell me everything. Don’t pretend you do.”
“Ok. Fine. But there are certain things you aren’t old enough to understand. I can’t help that.”
“I can understand anything. I’m not a child.”
“You are eleven. That makes you a child.” I wasn’t trying to offend her, but I also wasn’t going to pretend.
“I’m twelve next week. And then I’ll be thirteen and a teen.”
“Fine. When you turn thirteen I’ll start telling you everything.”
“No you won’t.” She pouted. “Don’t lie.”
“Come on, Genevy, tell me.” I couldn’t help her—or myself—if she didn’t fill me in.
“That’s not fair. You can’t call me that when you know how much I’m struggling.” She clasped her hands together in front of her.
“You closed the door. That means you want to tell me.” I took a seat and patted the spot beside me. “Come on. Let’s talk.”
“No. I only closed it because I don’t want to take the chance of anyone even hearing us discuss this.”
“No one else is in our wing. You know that.”
“Fine.” She glanced at the closed door and then back to me. “Mother is sending you off to find a mate.”
“What?” I hadn’t expected that. I mean, I knew full well mother wanted me to find one, but she’d said nothing about sending me off to select someone. She wasn’t in that much of a hurry, at least I didn’t think she was. “You must be kidding me.”
Genevieve took the seat I’d suggested. “And she’s making Frost take you.”
“Frost?” My mind went immediately to our kiss. To the intensity between us and the realization that no, I hadn’t imagined things all those years. He felt the same things I did. “Well, he would have told me anyway.”
“I doubt it.” Genevieve looked down at her lap. “Mother threatened him. She threatened his family.”
Anger surged through me. I hated my mother sometimes. Being a leader wasn’t easy, and being strict had its benefits, but threats like that were taking things too far.
“Thank you for telling me. I swear I won’t let you get in trouble.”
“But you are going to go? You won’t get Frost in trouble?”
“Of course I won’t get Frost in trouble.” I’d get myself in trouble or worse long before I let him get hurt.
“Are you going to tell him I told you?” Her lower lip quivered. “Because he told me I shouldn’t tell.”
“I won’t tell him right away. Then he’d be stuck between a rock and a hard place. I can’t ask him to lie to my mother. She is the queen.” She liked him as much as she liked anyone, but that didn’t mean she’d spare him her wrath.
“I wish I could go with you. But he said I can’t.”
“No, you can’t. It’s not safe for you out there.” I put an arm around her. She was too young to be dealing with any of this. I wished I could protect her from all of it.
“But it’s not safe for you either.”
“Yes, but if anything happens to me, the court needs you.” Sometimes I wondered what it would be like if she’d been born first, but I wouldn’t have wanted to push that kind of responsibility on anyone, especially not Genevieve. She was far too gentle of a soul. Sure she had strength, but she was too good of a person to deal with the responsibility of running Winter Court.
“Nothing is going to happen to you. It can’t.” She stiffened.
“You know I do my best.” But I’d try harder. For her sake.
“I’d miss you. And I don’t want to be queen.”
“You’d make a better queen than me.” She would. Even at eleven she had more patience than I did. And she cared. She really cared about people, whether she knew them or not.
“That’s not true.” She turned toward me.
“Yes, it is. But that’s not here or now. I don’t have plans to put that kind of responsibility on you. I’ll make sure I stay alive.”
“Can I stay in here to eat my candy?” When she asked things like that she sounded so much younger. So like the little girl she’d always be in my head.
“Sure. You can stay as long as you want. But I’m going out.” I handed the candy back.
“To find Frost?” She took a yellow crystal from the pouch.
“Yes. I need to find him.”
“I bet he’s out at the range.”
“I was thinking the same thing.” Frost’s schedule was fairly predictable. Something I really liked about him. “I’ll see you soon, Genevy.”
“I don’t mind when you use my nickname for those reasons. That’s totally different.”
“I know.” I gave her a quick hug before I walked out of my room. I still wasn’t ready to face my mother. No, first I needed to find Frost.
He was exactly where both Genevieve and I knew he’d be. Out at the range, practicing with his bow. He was the best archer in the court, which was rare for a shifter who didn’t need a weapon to fight. The rest of us Fae did. But Frost was an amazing archer; he had an athleticism I envied and admired.
I stood back and admired him as he launched off an arrow. It hit the target right on the bullseye.
He set another arrow. I watched the muscles in his arm tense as he pulled it back and let it loose. It hit right next to the previous one.
“You had better keep practicing. You may have been off by a fraction of a millimeter,” I teased.
“Any amount of a distance off can be the difference between life and death.” He said almost to himself before he abruptly set down his bow and turned to me. “Glad to see you back, Wren.” He wore a smile, but it seemed forced. His eyes were sad. If Genevieve hadn’t told me what was going on I’d have been freaking out that he was hiding something from me or was still being weird about our kiss. But I couldn’t ignore it completely. Otherwise he’d be suspicious.
“No hug?”
“Sorry. Just a long day.” He pulled me into a hug, and I melted into him, holding on tightly. No one hugged me the way he did. No one could give me comfort the way he did. He radiated warmth and security.
“Want to talk about it? You know, away from the bows and arrows.”
“There isn’t much to say. I just need to get more sleep.”
“You’re lying,” I called him out on it right away. I could always tell when he was hiding something. I was pretty sure he could do the same for me.
“Maybe I am. But either way I want to hear about your trip first.”
“Not much to tell. Hung out with Lacey. Drank a lot of honeydew.”
“Wow, admitting it even.” He playfully nudged my shoulder.
“Come on. You know it’s hard for me to resist honeydew.”
“Yes. Yes, it is. I don't quite know how you can drink that sweet stuff.”
“I can’t help that you have no taste for things that are sweet. You are the one missing out on the good life.”
“The good life? Getting drunk on honeydew is the good life now?” He walked over to the target and pulled out a half dozen arrows. He brought them back and slipped them into his bag.
“I’m not only talking about honeydew. I'm talking about all sweets. Life is so much better with sweets.”
“That’s your personal opinion.” He put in his bow and slung the bag over his shoulder.
I felt a nudge of guilt that I’d interrupted his session at the range. But I knew he didn’t really care. “Nope. It’s fact. Cold, hard fact.”
“I missed you, Wren.”
“Yeah, I kind of missed you too.” I looked at his lips. Why was I looking at his lips? And especially why I was thinking about kissing those lips? Kissing them the first time had been a mistake. I certainly couldn’t make that mistake again. His friendship meant too much to me.
“Where did you want to go chat?”
“Oh. The tavern?” I wanted to talk privately, but then he’d be suspicious. Starting off by talking over a drink seemed far less conspicuous.
“Going to settle for some ice wine? No honeydew here.”
“I’ve missed ice wine.”
“Then let’s go.”
“It’s still daytime though.”
“When has that ever stopped you?” He quirked an eyebrow.
“It never has.” I linked my arm with his. “Let’s go.” I knew I’d probably regret putting off talking to my mother, but I also knew I wasn’t ready to see her without letting something on. She had this uncanny ability to see through me. But I refused to let my little sister get in trouble. I’d have to hold it together. Some ice wine might completely do the trick.
The path to the tavern was quiet aside from a few young girls skipping by. I envied them in some ways. The innocence. The lightness. I’d never had that. But I was also given opportunities most Fae would never have.
“What are you thinking about?” Frost asked.
I glanced at him. His blue eyes were so full of care and worry. I hated that my mother was putting him in this horrible position. “Nothing really. Just thinking.”
“You are always thinking about something.”
I shrugged. “Well, nothing worth discussing then.”
“I know it’s impossible to extract information from you that you don’t want to share.”
“Very true. But It’s really nothing.”
“Sure.” He patted my back. “Nothing at all.”
“Get enough ice wine in me and that might change.”
He grinned. “And that’s very true too.”
The tavern was mostly empty when we walked in. That wasn’t surprising considering it was only afternoon.
Frost started toward the large glass bar that ran the back wall of the space. “Should I order us some chips too?”
“Chips and ice mints, please.”
“Ice mints? More sweet?”
“Hey, I didn’t buy myself any crystal candies. I gave all of mine to Genevieve.”
“Yeah? Was she appropriately appreciative?” He adjusted the strap of his bag.
“Yeah, she was. But sad about not being able to wear the dress I got her out.”
“Still nice of you to get her one.”
“I always bring her back something.”
“Didn’t get me something, I bet,” he teased. He always teased me.
“Of course I did.”
“Oh?” There was something akin to curiosity in his voice. Hopefully my gift would bring that sexy as hell smile back to his face. I wanted to wipe the worry away.
I walked over to our usual table in the corner. The one that gave a perfect view of the sunset as it made its way down behind the icy mountains that served as the western boundary of our court. It was a strong natural defense for us.
Before long Frost walked over with two tall glasses of ice wine and a bowl of ice mints pressed against his chest. “Chips may take a bit.”
“That’s fine.” I took the mints and set them in the middle of the table even though I knew Frost wasn’t going to touch them. “I’m not in a rush.”
“You’re avoiding your mother.”
“What makes you say that?”
“You mean other than the fact that you are always avoiding your mother?”
“I’m not always avoiding her.” I sipped my ice wine.
“Sure you are.”
“Fine. Okay. But I’m avoiding her even more than normal right now.” I took a handful of ice mints. I’d skipped lunch, and I needed something until the chips came.
“Because she’s mad you went away?”
“Is she?” I popped a mint into my mouth.
“Wren. Come on. You know very well she is.”
“I needed the time away.”
“I know you did. Doesn’t mean she’s going to understand it.” He swirled his wine around in his glass.
“She doesn’t understand anything about me.”
“She’s got a very fixed viewpoint. That’s just the way she is.”
“I won’t be that way.” I tried to watch him without making it too obvious. “When I’m queen.”
“Wow.”
“Wow, what?”
“I’ve never heard you talk that way. To say when you are queen, as if it’s a sure thing to happen.”
I shrugged. “Maybe I'm finally facing reality.”
He raised his glass. “I’ll toast to that.”
“Since when did you want me to face reality?”
“I just want you to be happy.”
“Is that so?” I wanted to blurt it out. I wanted to blurt out I knew he was going along with my mother and taking me to find a mate, but I couldn’t. I knew why he was doing it. He’d do anything to protect his family. And I respected him for it. I’d have done the same thing to protect my sister.
“Of course it is.” He set his glass down as I made no move to cheers. “What’s up, Wren?”
If I couldn’t pull this off with Frost, I had zero chance of pulling it off with my mother. “It’s just weird to be back. That’s all.”
“Maybe you should get things over with. Seeing your mom that is.”
Not until I get some chips.” And finish a few more glasses of ice wine.
The door to the tavern opened and a group of teens walked in.
Frost watched them intently. I looked closer. His younger brother Preston was in the group.
I observed as Preston made his way to the bar. “He’s not a little kid anymore, huh?”
“He is. He just doesn’t like to think of himself that way.”
“He sure doesn’t look like it.” I observed as he slung his arms around two teen girls.
Frost watched his brother intently. “He needs to watch himself.”
“You’re worried.”
“Yeah… I am.” His brow furrowed deeply.
“He’s a good kid. He will be fine.”
“Wolves have to be careful… we are welcome here in some ways and not in others. Especially my kind.”
“You are welcome here.” I reached over and grabbed his hand. “You are completely welcome here.”
“By you.” He didn’t take his eyes off Preston.
“You forget I'm going to be queen soon.”
He turned his attention back to me. “Twice in one conversation. Wow.”
“You like the word wow today.” I looked out the window and watched as the sun started its descent. “It’s even more beautiful than normal tonight.”
He followed my gaze. “That’s the amazing thing about sunsets. Each one is different, yet it’s always the same thing.”
“How many times do you think we’ve sat at this table?” I asked.
“Too many to count.”
“I’m going to miss this table.” I ran my hands over the worn wooden tabletop.
“Are you planning on going anywhere?”
No, but you are planning on us both going somewhere. I, of course, couldn’t say it out loud, but I was definitely feeling it. “I just mean when I’m queen.”
“You can still come here. No one can stop you.”
“Can you imagine my mother sitting here?” I popped another mint into my mouth.
“You’re not your mother. Nor will you ever be.”
“Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.” He tapped his glass into mine. “Let’s enjoy the rest of the sunset.”