Travell had never been struck with such all-consuming fear in his time as an agent for the Crown, but when he saw Alyssa in the frenzied grip of his father’s madness, he had nearly lost his own tenuous hold on sanity. He’d seen red as he lunged for Lord Trenton, knocking him to the ground and rolling him onto his back. He’d just lifted his fist to send it flying into the older man’s face, but the fury he’d initially read on the man’s face was replaced with white-faced horror.
Slowly, Travell lowered his arm as Ives and the two footmen he’d enlisted to help him search for his father rushed over and hauled the earl off into the coach. As they departed for the manor, he came back to his senses and went to check on Alyssa. Bruises marred her porcelain neck, but at least she was breathing.
He gently lifted her into his arms and strode to her carriage where her maid’s eyes were as round as saucers. “What happened?” she breathed.
“My crazed father attacked her,” he returned harshly. “To Rosewood as quickly as possible!” he shouted to the driver.
Travell cradled Alyssa on his lap. She had been valiant in her efforts to help the earl, but Travell knew it had all been in vain. He realized now that he would have no choice but to suffer the scandal and send his father to Bedlam, for he wouldn’t allow something like this to happen again.
But first, he would do what he’d been dreading and send a letter to his mother and inform her of her husband’s resurgence.
When they returned to Rosewood, Travell took Alyssa to his chamber and laid her on his bed. However, the moment he did so, her eyes fluttered and she awoke with a light cough. Relief instantly flooded Travell. He brushed a stray curl away from her forehead. “How are you?” he whispered, emotion clogging his throat.
She blinked at him. “I have to… tell you… something,” she said in a raspy tone.
She swallowed several times, but the effort seemed to pain her, so he said, “Don’t try to talk now. We can discuss it later when you’ve fully recovered and Lord Trenton has been sent away.”
Alyssa shook her head adamantly and clutched at his jacket lapels. “No. You mustn’t. He told me… about Sophie.”
For a moment, Travell was at sea, and then recognition dawned and all the blood seemed to recede from his body. “Do you mean… ?” He was so shocked he couldn’t even finish the sentence.
She nodded. “Yes. I know today was… unfortunate.” Travell would have used a decidedly different description. “But we are… making progress. I… feel it.”
They were interrupted by an angry roar that sounded from farther down the hallway, followed by a long wail, like that of an animal in great agony. “I just don’t know how much more of this I can take,” he whispered.
Alyssa grabbed his hand, her green eyes full of determination. “You forget that you’re not… alone.”
Travell couldn’t speak. In truth, he didn’t know how to respond. He didn’t know what he’d done in his life to earn the dedication of this woman, but he was grateful for it.
He stood and said, “I’ll send up a tea tray and see if cook can’t make some sort of herbal remedy to ease your throat.”
Travell left the room, but before he went downstairs, he had to grip the railing to steady himself. He knew as long as he lived he would never forget the panic on his father’s face when he’d drawn back his arm, fully prepared to deliver a punishing blow.
Until that moment, Travell hadn’t even considered what he meant to do; he’d just acted on impulse. But now that he had time to reflect, he was ashamed that he’d been about to, not only strike his sire, but someone who was suffering from a mental affliction.
Was he truly so deprived that he would have struck a sick old man?
Bile rose up, but he forced it back as he stumbled down the stairs and headed for the kitchens.
***
Alyssa felt better after a brief nap, soothed to sleep by the combination of Travell’s manly scent that clung to his counterpane, and the stressful events of that morning. Once she drank some hot tea and whatever the cook had added to the liquid, most of the soreness in her throat had eventually dissipated. However, a glance in the mirror showed that the purple bruises would take some time to fade. She attempted to draw her fichu a bit higher to hide the marks, but with the current fashions of a lowered neckline, it was almost impossible to hide them completely.
She left Travell’s chamber and started to make her way downstairs to the conservatory, for she hadn’t yet checked on her roses, but she hesitated, turning back to Lord Trenton’s chamber instead. All was silent now, but she had to see how he was faring.
She gently eased open the door and peeked inside. She was disheartened to see the brown glass laudanum bottle was sitting on the side table. When she glanced at the bed she saw that the earl was asleep, but it wasn’t an easy rest, for every now and then he would frown, his legs jerking with whatever nightmare was tormenting him. Not only had his wrists been tied back with the leather straps, but his legs had also been bound.
She gently closed the wooden door, her throat aching for an entirely different reason now. It hurt her to see such a powerful man of society brought to such a low level. Granted, he might have brought all this madness upon himself; they might never know, but to be lost inside one’s own mind was a personal hell that no person should ever have to endure.
Since there was nothing else she could do for him at the moment, she headed to the conservatory. When she entered, she was surprised to see that the Blue Ladies’ blossoms had grown even larger since the day before. If anything would make her smile, it was the sight of her precious flowers.
She grabbed a watering can and went to the kitchens to fill it with fresh water from the indoor spigot. While she was there she thanked the cook for the herbal tea, at which the older woman actually blushed and expressed her appreciation for Alyssa’s help in trying to “restore the master to his former glory.”
Once Alyssa had returned to her roses, she began to hum a light tune. It was from a pocket-sized Swiss music box that her father had given her about a year before he’d died. He’d told her that he had gotten it during his Grand Tour of the continent and given it to her mother as a birthday gift. He’d passed it on to Alyssa when she’d turned seven. Although she didn’t remember much about her childhood, the years having stripped away much of her earliest memories, she knew that was one that would never fade.
She walked along the conservatory, sniffing the various petals as she went along, and then giving them a gentle shower from the watering can.
It wasn’t until she turned a corner and the doorway came back into view that she jumped. She put a hand to her pounding heart when she saw Travell leaning against the frame. “You startled me,” she said with a light laugh.
“I didn’t mean to,” he returned softly. And that was when she noticed he wasn’t smiling.
She frowned in concern. “Are you well?”
He scratched his jaw and shrugged. “I’m not really sure how to answer that,” he murmured as he strode into the room, moving to the other side of the table of flowers that stood between them. Instead of looking at her, he stared intently at a rhododendron. He was silent so long that she wasn’t sure if he was even going to elaborate, but then he blew out a breath and said, “How is one supposed to feel after contemplating killing his own father?”
Alyssa wasn’t sure she had the right reply to that, but she knew she had to say something, for it was obvious he was torn. “You wouldn’t have killed him.”
This time he did look at her, and the pain she read in his turbulent blue eyes broke her heart. “Are you so confident, then? Because I’m not so certain.”
She set down the watering can and moved to him. But instead of being empathetic, this time, her tone was firm. “You listen to me, Travell Abernathy.” She poked him in the chest with her finger to make sure he was listening. “I know you, a man who has honor and compassion and any number of other good traits that are sadly lacking in so many others. You might have been upset, but Lord Trenton had nothing to fear from you. If he had, we wouldn’t be standing here having this ridiculous conversation.” She poked him a second time. “You are a decent man. You always have been. You just haven’t had anyone slap some sense into you, but I’m not afraid to do so, because I know I have nothing to fear from you.”
He snatched her hand and yanked her to him, trapping her against his hard body. “Are you quite positive about that, my lady?”
She gasped, but she knew this was all part of his inner battle. She lifted her chin and dared to meet his gaze. “This moment has nothing to do with fear.”
His nostrils flared, his eyes darkening to a fascinating blue to rival that of her roses. “I daresay you are rather correct on that score.”
Alyssa allowed his kiss. In truth, she wanted it, had been craving it ever since they had parted ways the day before.
He drank of her hungrily, like a man in the desert denied water who was given his first drink. His hands roamed over her back, pressing her fully against him. She could feel his erection pressing against her urgently. She moved her hips restlessly and he groaned, finally pulling away and setting her at arm’s length.
He was breathing heavily, his eyes closed, when he said, “You need to go Alyssa. Now. Before that eloquent speech no longer has any meaning.”
Alyssa paused, but then she turned and fled.
***
“Your thoughts seem rather distant this evening, cousin.”
Alyssa glanced up at James’ unspoken query as they sat around the dining table for the evening meal.
“I hope none of your flowers have died tragically.”
He smirked at his own joke, and Caroline grinned from across the table.
“No. They’re fine,” she returned evenly. “I fear I was just woolgathering about Aunt Pearl.”
Alyssa hated to lie, especially when it was about one of the most important people who had recently been snuffed from her life. But she couldn’t very well tell them the truth, that Travell’s intense kisses had caused her to forget everything of late, including her dearly departed aunt. While her grief was still present, his overwhelming presence, combined with concern for the earl’s welfare, caused her to focus on something other than her own personal misery.
“Heavens,” Caroline huffed as she set down her fork with a clatter. “Must you mope about this house for another month? You act as though she’s the only person who has ever died. It’s a fact of life, Alyssa.” She glared at her black gown. “And I should think it’s time to put away those gloomy weeds you insist on wearing.”
Alyssa stared directly back at the horrid woman. Truly, how could anyone be so cruel? “I am allowed three months to mourn the loss of an aunt, but since she was so much more than that, I might extend it.”
“No,” Caroline snapped. “I forbid it. You’re dragging down the entire morale of the servants with your morbid habits. I expect a bit of color tomorrow or—” She shrugged. “You may have to find other family to take you on.”
Alyssa had to relax her hand where it had been clenching her knife. Instead of replying to her, she looked to James for assistance. He’d remained silent throughout the exchange, but he looked a slightly green when she pinned him with her glare. “James?”
He swallowed visibly and glanced at his wife and then straightened his shoulders when he returned his gaze to her. “I’m afraid Caroline is right. Besides, it might improve your overall demeanor.”
Alyssa gritted her teeth. Apparently, no help would be coming from that quarter, but she wasn’t entirely surprised. Her cousin might be the master of the house, but he wasn’t the one who ran things here. “I see.” She slid back her chair, and without another word, climbed the stairs to her room. She was half tempted to slam it shut behind her, but she refrained.
Nevertheless, she uttered a curse when she entered, causing her maid to glance at her in surprise. “I’m sorry, Daisy. I’m just rather overset by Lady Lockley at the moment.”
Her maid nodded. “The servants talk about what a nasty woman she is, but the baron pays them well, so they endure her mistreatment to keep their position.”
After hearing this, some of Alyssa’s frustration dissipated. At least she could escape Caroline’s viperous tongue while the servants had no choice but to endure it day after day. Even so, she collapsed on the bed with a sigh. “I just wish things were… different. If only they could return to normal, when Aunt Pearl was alive.”
“I know you miss her, my lady,” Daisy said. “I could tell from the first time I was employed as your ladies’ maid nearly five years ago that she meant a lot to you.”
“That she did,” Alyssa agreed, feeling the sting of familiar tears.
“If it’s not too bold of me to say so,” her maid said slowly. “Lord Curdiff is rather handsome and you told me that he offered for your hand. I can see that he cares deeply for you as well, and if you truly wish to change your current circumstances—”
Alyssa shook her head. “I’m afraid that’s quite out of the question. You’re interpreting affection for something more. Travell and I have known each other since we were children.” He doesn’t kiss you like a child, her mind taunted.
“Some would say affection is enough to sustain a marriage,” her maid pointed out.
Alyssa stared out the window. “It isn’t for me.” She shook her head. “That’s enough maudlin talk. I think I’ll turn in early this evening.”
Daisy curtsied. “Yes, my lady.”
As the maid began to gather her things to prepare for bed, Alyssa walked over to the window and undid the latch. The night air was cool and she breathed in deeply. A slight breeze rustled the leaves still clinging to the trees, although they were starting to lose their color and she knew it wouldn’t be long before the branches were bare, giving way for winter to settle in.
A sudden chill made gooseflesh break out on her arms, and she hugged herself. She wasn’t looking forward to the long, dreary season to come. She detested snow and being stuck inside this manor with only her cousin and Caroline for company was certainly not appealing.
Then again, she didn’t know how much longer Travell intended to remain at Rosewood. It likely depended on his father and how much change there would be. Either way, Parliament wouldn’t reconvene until the spring. But while his duties might not draw him back to the city for the “Little Season,” surely his mother would be wondering about his long absence. She seldom left the city, even in the winter and summer months, preferring town to that of the country. And what about Triana when she returned?
Alyssa cringed at her friend’s reaction. After a honeymoon that was filled with love and adoration, to come back to something so dejecting…
She released a sigh. Alyssa might wish for something more with Travell, but she must keep her focus on doing everything she could for the earl. Today had been a setback, but she had faith that they would eventually break through the madness that had taken over Lord Trenton’s mind. She wouldn’t accept any other outcome.
With her resolve in place, she readied herself for bed. When her maid departed, she reached for the treatise on her bedside table and settled in to read.