The next morning Glory sat at her dressing table, her lips still tingling from the kiss from the night before. She’d tossed and turned for a while last night before finally settling into a deep dreamless sleep, but the moment she awoke she’d remembered it all over again. She ran a fingertip over her bottom lip, remembering the soft heat of his mouth and how his tongue had felt against hers. A dart of electricity sparked down to her belly, settling there with a slow burn. A blush stained her cheeks in the mirror and she couldn’t stop the ridiculous smile that curved her lips.
Zane Pierce was a much better kisser than she’d assumed he would be. His size suggested brute strength and a lack of finesse, but he’d been surprisingly gentle and attentive. Over the years she’d had men steal kisses from her before. It was like a strange badge of honor with some of them, and she knew about that ridiculous wager in that betting book across town. Since that had come up a year or so ago, the men had progressed from stolen kisses to flirting conversation meant to somehow sweep her off her feet. None of them ever swept her off her feet.
Not one in the entire twelve years she’d been here. But last night Zane had made her knees go weak. Had she not been pressed against the wall, she was certain that she would’ve fallen. The thing was, he’d made her weak in the knees before he’d even kissed her. It had started when he’d given her that heavy-lidded look of his that meant he was thinking naughty things. The final blow had come, however, when he’d asked for her permission.
None of the men had ever asked permission. Not one. Despite the fact that she wasn’t selling herself every night, they walked into the house as if she owed them whatever they demanded. More than once Able had been forced to show a man out because he wasn’t happy she wouldn’t take him upstairs. Zane had looked as if he expected her to turn him down. She knew that she probably shouldn’t have, but when he’d allowed her to take the lead, she’d been unable to refuse them what they both wanted. How much harm could one little kiss cause anyway?
A crinkling of paper and a flash of white caught her attention. A folded piece of paper slid nearly soundlessly across the hardwood floor of her bedchamber. The distinct thump of Zane’s boots moving away from the door had her heart beating in her throat. On quiet feet because she wanted to keep the moment of discovery to herself, she walked over and picked up the paper before returning to her stool. She expected to open it to find a note and listened for the front door of her suite, imagining that he was simply telling her he was leaving for the morning. But when she opened it, she got a surprise.
A beautiful rose in full bloom stared back at her. Each petal was artfully sketched in dramatic detail. It was breathtaking. She ran her fingertips over the graphite lines, picturing him sitting out on her sofa drawing them for her. His fingertips must have traced over the lines as hers were doing now. Had he realized how she loved roses? Had he hoped to make her smile? Or perhaps the drawing had been a casual amusement. Did it mean anything to him or had it simply been a pleasant way to pass the time?
Tucking the corners of the drawing into the frame of her mirror, she smiled again at her reflection. The woman smiling back at her was almost unrecognizable. It was the same face with the same red hair that stared back at her every morning. The same smile that she’d learned long ago to keep plastered on her face was there, but this morning something was different. The eyes were different. They were smiling in a way she hadn’t seen in a long time. It was silly to think that it was all because of Zane, but it had to be him. He was the only thing that had changed. He was reminding her of what it meant to enjoy the little things.
A smile, a drawing...a kiss.
Butterflies swarmed in her belly as she remembered that kiss all over again. If she closed her eyes, she could still feel the soft pressure of his lips on hers. She’d never enjoyed a kiss before, albeit she’d never been kissed by someone she wanted to kiss. Would it be possible for her to enjoy more with him?
She shook her head, but the idea of more swirled around in there anyway, seeming like it could be a possibility. Maybe, though almost definitely not. It was an insane idea. They were too different. She was too damaged. He was a rambling type of man who would never be happy here for long. She knew all the reasons it wouldn’t work, but those reasons did nothing to stop the flare of ridiculous hope that flickered to life inside her.
Suddenly anxious to see him again, she rushed through the rest of her morning ablutions. Her stomach tilted and whirled as she imagined what she might say to him or what he might say to her. The kiss didn’t have to change anything, but she knew that it had because every time she looked at him now she’d remember that it had happened. She’d remember how good it felt to be the center of his world for those few slow-moving seconds. She’d remember how she’d liked it. She’d know how very much she wanted to repeat it.
She chose to forget the feeling of panic that had bubbled up inside her and made her run from him. It wasn’t his fault she was so anxious with men. In fact, she rather thought that had he been her first, the experience would be nothing but delicious fun.
Smoothing a hand over her belly to calm the nerves that had started up at the prospect of seeing him, she opened her door and stepped out into the parlor of her suite. He’d been sitting on the sofa but stood when he saw her. He watched her with an expectant look on his face as if he’d been just as anxious to see her as she’d been to see him. For a moment, they simply stood watching each other.
“Thank you for the rose,” she said, breaking the charged silence.
His shoulders seemed to relax as he took a cautious step toward her, followed by another, but his expression was neutral. He wore the same clothes from last night, and she realized how much of his own comfort he was sacrificing to stay with her every night.
“I’m glad you like it.” He took in a breath, his jaw tightening. “I wanted to apologize.”
Her breath caught in her throat. He’d no doubt seen her fear when she’d run, but she didn’t want him to apologize for kissing her. Not when he’d asked her and she’d said yes. Not when she’d kissed him back and for one brief moment it had been perfect. If he apologized, then it could take it all away. It would mean he was sorry that it had happened and she didn’t want that. She wanted to be normal. She wasn’t, but she wanted to be, and she didn’t need one more reminder that she wasn’t. And she shouldn’t expect him to understand that. She knew that she was being incredibly unfair to him, but her hands tightened into tense fists at her sides and she prayed that everything she was feeling wasn’t reflected on her face.
Realizing that she was ranting in her own mind, she made her face very still and asked, “For what?”
“Because we argued.” He tipped his head down to look at her as he came to a stop in front of her. “And because I called you stubborn.”
The relief that swept through her nearly leveled her. She wanted to ask him what he’d thought of the kiss, but she wasn’t brave enough to bring it up. She’d faced down men trying to force her to sell her business to them without flinching, but she couldn’t bring up a kiss to Zane. Instead, she grinned and said, “It’s fine.” Making a show of looking around to check that no one overheard, she added in a near whisper, “Besides, I am a little stubborn.”
The corner of his mouth tipped up in a smirk. His eyes somehow deepened, becoming so dark they were nearly black. When his gaze flicked to her mouth, she knew that he was reliving the kiss. “Then I don’t need to apologize for...?” He allowed the question to trail off into the heavy but not uncomfortable silence between them.
She shook her head and that acknowledgment made the fire that had been temporarily banked flare to life. His heated gaze met hers and she swallowed past the need to touch him, to feel his solid presence beneath her palms, to touch her mouth to his and relive the wonderful magic he’d stoked to life within her.
“You ran away.” It wasn’t a question, but an open statement. He wanted her to fill in the blanks, and she found herself doing that before she’d even realized it.
“I did.” She nodded, chewing her bottom lip because she was unreasonably nervous. “I feel quite ashamed about that if you want to know the truth.”
“Don’t feel ashamed.” He reached out as if he might hold her hand, but he stopped at the last second. Instead of holding it, he ran his knuckles over the back of her hand, an almost touch that seemed far more poignant than it should. Tiny prickles of pleasure coursed over her hand, warming her palm.
Her eyes glued to that point of contact, she said, “There are things that have happened...” No, she wouldn’t go into the past now. It would only tarnish what she knew would live in her memory as a glorious moment. His eyes were warm and soft when she met his gaze. “Please just know that my running had nothing to do with you. What we did was lovely.”
He took in a long steady breath, his beautiful lips parting. A sprinkling of stubble had grown in overnight on his chin and upper lip. “Yes, it was.”
The flames from his gaze licked up her neck in a nearly tangible touch. Her skin prickled, tightening with the need for more of his touch. She gave a slow nod, words somehow escaping her beneath the weight of his interest. “Yes, but I’m not certain I’m capable of going further.”
“No further.” He took a step closer and her heart leaped eagerly into her throat, prompting her to step back. “But more of the same?”
God yes. She wanted to kiss him again. She wanted to spend the entire day kissing him, but she wouldn’t. Couldn’t. Her entire life since her escape had depended on her being calm and in control. It was faintly disturbing how she wanted to give in to him now, which is partially why she made herself abstain. She needed to get her head on straight before trying that kiss again. It wouldn’t do for her to go making more of it than she already had.
“I have things to do this morning before we open for the day.”
He clenched his jaw and disappointment flashed in his eyes as understanding dawned across his face. When he would’ve said something, she shook her head, dropping her hand to her side. “I’m needed to go over the menu for the evening. Why don’t you go to your room to freshen up?”
Predictably, he shook his head. “We’ve been over this, Glory. Where you go, I go.”
She couldn’t help but roll her eyes at his needless protection. “Fine, but let’s get you to your room first so you can freshen up and change your clothes. We’re going to have to move you in if this goes on much longer.”
* * *
Zane followed her silently as she led the way to the second-floor servants’ quarters. He’d tossed and turned all night thinking about that kiss and wondering if he’d pushed too hard. He raked a hand through his hair, pondering why he’d even bothered pushing. She was clearly not interested in an affair; he was not interested in a relationship. There was no reason they should continue and yet he found that he couldn’t stop pursuing her.
In the early morning hours, once he’d realized that he’d never get back to sleep, he’d turned on the lamp and started sketching a rose. With Glory’s rose scent surrounding him, the premonition his aunt had shared with him as a child refused to leave him alone. He’d hoped the sketch would work as a reminder—one more reason he couldn’t have Glory—but it had somehow come to represent her as he’d drawn. Each petal had become another layer of the woman who haunted him. Another way for him to caress the curves that had been denied him.
She had very good reason for keeping him away. She was obviously frightened of men. Last night she’d told him that someone had hurt her—that a man had hurt her—and he had a very good hunch that it was the man from whom she’d run. The man who was now hovering at the edges of her hard-won security and threatening it. Zane had never despised anyone he hadn’t met as much as he despised him. He needed to focus on finding that man and setting things to rights for her, instead of dreaming about her naked.
When he’d been around ten years old, Zane had helped his father track down a man who had been smuggling guns to his mother’s people. His mother had been dead for a few years by then and it was from the bullet of a gun that man had smuggled to them. Zane had never met the smuggler, but he’d hated him. At night, he’d lie awake staring up into the stars, planning all the many ways he wanted the man to die. He’d hated him with all the venom in his ten-year-old heart.
This eclipsed that. Even as a child, Zane had known deep down that his hatred had been misplaced. His mother had died because the rifle had malfunctioned. It had been an accident, nothing more sinister, but Zane’s life had changed forever. Not only had he lost his mother, but he’d been sent to live with the father he barely knew. All that anger had been funneled into hatred for the man who’d supplied the guns, but the gunrunner hadn’t really been responsible for her death.
This man, however, had purposely harmed Glory, and his specter hung over her constantly, promising more harm. Whatever he’d done to her, it had been compounded over the years by the fear of discovery. The man deserved what was coming to him when Zane caught him.
His gaze narrowed on the woman who walked in front of him. Today she was wearing a stylishly cut, bourbon-colored gown that emphasized her narrow waist and the flare of her hips. Her small frame made her seem tiny and fragile compared to him. He imagined that if he held her waist his fingers would easily meet. What sort of bastard would harm her? The thought of it caused him to clench his jaw so hard that the sound of his teeth gritting caught her attention and she gave him a glance over her shoulder. He vowed to find the sender of that damned letter. And then, whether she agreed or not, he’d find the bastard that had her living in fear.
The hall in the servants’ area was neatly kept but without the extravagance of the front of the house. The floors were covered in simple rugs and the walls in pale yellow wallpaper. It was homey and cheerful here, without the heaviness of formality. They turned the corner and a glance confirmed there was already a wait for the bathing chamber shared with the tenants at this end of the hall. Some of the servants lived in town, but many preferred to stay on the property. Zane had been given a small, well-appointed room on this end of the second floor.
Digging the key from his pocket, he stepped around her and unlocked the door to his room. When she would’ve waited for him in the hall, he grabbed her arm and tugged her inside the room.
“Surely you don’t think I’ll be accosted in the hallway?”
Zane didn’t know what he thought, but he wasn’t taking chances with what he’d learned about her past. The bastard could have paid any one of the servants for information about her. What was to stop him from paying them to bring her to him? His movements were jerky with suppressed anger as he grabbed extra clothes from the bureau opposite the foot of the bed. Anger was his only refuge from the desire pounding through him. If he could think about finding that man, then he wouldn’t think of how good she’d feel under him.
“You’ll be safer with me,” was the only explanation he offered her.
She sighed dramatically, but he wasn’t interested in arguing with her again today. “Are you really planning to shadow my every movement?” Her voice came from right over his shoulder so he turned to face her.
“Unless you’re with Able, if that’s what it takes to keep you safe.”
She gave him a quick once-over. “Then we really need to get you some new clothes.”
He looked down at his clothes. Thanks to his years with the Reyes Brothers, he was able to afford quality clothing. His breeches and shirts were custom-made, not the ranch hand quality clothing that could be purchased ready-made on the shelves of a general store. “What’s wrong with my clothes?”
“Nothing.” She gave a shrug of her delicate shoulder. “But we have standards at Victoria House. You need a waistcoat and matching coat at the very least.” She looked back down again. “And you need proper shoes, not boots.”
“These are quality leather,” he said, rolling his foot from one side to the other to show off his boots. They were the single most expensive item of clothing he’d ever purchased, but they’d been worth it. Rain or snow, they’d held up well and kept his feet dry.
“It’s not the quality but the style. If you’re going to be seen at Victoria House lurking behind me, then you need to be dressed like a gentleman not a...a...”
“A gunslinger?” He smirked, filling in the blank.
“Exactly.” The smile she gave him was so bright that he blinked, momentarily stunned by how beautiful she was. He was always aware of her beauty, but sometimes it would catch him by surprise all over again.
“I doubt I’ll be here long enough to warrant a brand-new wardrobe.”
“Of course not, but I’ll set up an appointment with Able’s tailor for this afternoon. He must have a suit that he’s been working on for Able that he could alter for you.”
Zane shook his head. “No, thank you. I don’t need another reason to have Able dislike me.”
She laughed, seeming strangely lighthearted when compared to how grumpy he felt after his sleepless night. “I’m sure he’ll understand, but I agree. He really doesn’t like you. What did you ever do to anger him anyway?”
After his brief discussion with Able two nights ago, he realized now that it was Able simply being overly protective of her. Even a fool could sense Zane’s interest in her, and since Able knew her past, he knew they wouldn’t suit. In some ways, Zane had begun to understand Able’s position and he could appreciate his protective instinct. After the way she’d run last night, Zane knew that he should listen to him, but he also knew that he couldn’t stop this attraction between them. Instead of answering, he shrugged.
“And don’t worry about the cost. You’re working for me so I’ll pay for it.”
“I can pay for it.” He frowned, disliking the fact that she thought he couldn’t. True, he didn’t have the sort of wealth that would afford a mansion like this, but his work with the Jamesons had been lucrative. He’d be set up for a few years.
She didn’t seem to be paying attention as something about the sparse room had caught her attention. Aside from the bureau and the bed, it held a single bedside table and a washstand. “I just realized how much you must be sacrificing to stay on here for a while longer.”
“What do you mean?”
“Only that you must be looking forward to getting home soon. This room leaves a little to be desired when it comes to the comforts of home.” She met his gaze again and he realized how little they knew of the other’s life.
“I don’t...” He cleared his throat, uncertain why the admission was so difficult. “I don’t have anywhere to get home to.”
“Oh?” Her expression was so stunned he felt the need to explain.
“I was working at the Reyes hacienda when it was burned down. When Cas decided on revenge, well, let’s just say I had my own reasons for wanting revenge too.” She glanced at his scar and he gave a curt nod, unwilling to go into the story. He didn’t see a reason to bring Christine’s name up between them. “We’ve been sleeping in boardinghouses and under the stars ever since.” Not counting the few brief times they’d sought refuge at the Jameson Ranch outside Helena. He had his own room there, but it had never been his home. Hunter had mentioned him staying on there now that their hunt for Derringer was over, and Zane supposed it had been assumed that he would. Though he’d never made the conscious decision.
Now that he thought about it, he wasn’t entirely certain where his life would go from here. Before he’d landed at the hacienda, he’d been wandering from job to job. Before that he’d spent a childhood traveling with his father, a trader, from reservation to reservation. Sometimes he’d spend the summer with his mother’s people, but he wouldn’t go back to the reservation permanently. It didn’t feel like home.
“Then you must be looking forward to starting your life again.” She gave him a smile that was incredibly understanding, and he didn’t quite know what to do with it. The woman had every right to judge him. Here he was, a humble suitor with nothing to offer a woman like her, who had every physical comfort she could want.
“I’m looking forward to not having Derringer at my back.”
She grinned at that. “Unfortunately, I know just what you mean.” She was teasing him. Her own shadow of menace still lurked and she could tease him with it.
The woman was amazing. They were far more similar than they were different. While he couldn’t offer her physical things, he could offer her protection. He could put a stop to that lingering danger hanging over her. “I’ll get rid of him, Glory. Tell me who he is and I’ll make certain that he never harms you.”
“I wouldn’t take my danger and make it yours.” Her smile fell, but she held his gaze. Her hazel eyes were wide and solemn.
“It’s not your choice. I’m staying until this is over.” He meant it. In that moment he resolved that this wouldn’t stop with finding the sender of the letter. He couldn’t leave her until he knew that her past was well and truly in the past.
Shaking her head, she said, “This is only about the letter. I won’t have you in danger because of me.”
“I do what I want.” Maybe this was his new calling. He’d right the injustice done to her, whatever it had been.
The warmth of her palm pressing against his chest surprised him. He found himself wanting to lean into it, craving more of her touch.
“Please don’t, Zane. I want you to stay safe.”
Her touch didn’t surprise him nearly as much as the sound of his name coming from her lips. He immediately wanted to hear it again. He wanted her to whisper it in his ear as he pushed inside her. He clenched his fist against the urge to hold her against him. It wasn’t what she needed from him right now. “I know how to take care of myself.”
“Glory? You about ready for our meeting?” Able’s voice came from the open doorway.
She jerked away as if she’d been unaware of how closely they’d been standing. “I’m ready.” She smiled at Able.
Able gave him a surly look, but didn’t say anything more. Zane knew that they met every morning to go over plans for the day. Able then stayed with her until his duties called him to man the front door in the early evening.
She surprised Zane again when she turned back to him, this time holding out the key to her apartment. “Feel free to use my bathing chamber. It looks like the one down the hall is a little busy.”
He took it. The heat from her body had warmed the metal, so he savored that warmth in his palm. At least he’d earned her trust. “I’ll need to interview your staff again today, in case I missed something.”
“Between the two of us, we’ve covered them all,” Able said. Disapproval turned the corners of his mouth down.
“I plan to keep talking to them until we have something to go on.” He couldn’t accept that no one knew anything. Turning his attention back to Glory, he added, “Especially Charlotte. I’d like to start with her.”
She nodded in resignation. “I’ll let her know to expect you.”