eta and I ran up the stairs and out of the Enders Barracks.
“Where to?”
I stumbled to a stop. Peta’s question was more than loaded. I had no idea where to start looking for a Tracker. I needed a damn Tracker to find a Tracker. “Worm shit, I don’t know.”
“Is there no one you can ask? Is the mother goddess’s consort not here?”
I blinked several times. “Excuse me?”
“Griffin. He’s the . . . I thought you knew?” Peta looked up at me and then away, her eyes darting to the side. “Perhaps I was not supposed to tell you.”
In some ways, that explained a lot about Griffin. Except for the picture of the woman and the little boy. Who were they? Call it a hunch, but I had a feeling the mother goddess wasn’t much into sharing her consort with other women. “I won’t spill the can of beans. But he is not our only option. Niah can help. I think.”
Niah had a home in the southern edge of the Rim and I hurried that way. As our storyteller, she spun all the old tales. But she seemed to have a Reader’s knack for knowing what was coming and what was needed.
Crossing the main road of the Rim, the sun caught the tips of a head of bright red hair bent over a redwood seedling. My heart clenched at the sight of Cactus. “Peta, loving them both is going to kill me.”
“Don’t be melodramatic. It doesn’t suit you. Take Cactus with you on this journey. He’s powerful in his two elements, and he needs to be away from Vetch. Perhaps some time with him will show you he’s not the one for you.”
Her words stopped me. “What do you mean, not the one for me? How can you know?”
“I’ve said enough. You need to figure the rest out on your own.” She trotted ahead of me, stopping beside Cactus. “Prick, are you coming with us or staying here to play with the seedlings?”
I opened my mouth, words on the tip of my tongue. But she was right. I snapped my mouth shut. Cactus stood, saw me, and grinned. His love for life was contagious. I smiled back, but the smile faltered, as I understood what Ash had meant about not being able to share.
I could never tell Cactus I slept with Ash. Until I could tell him I’d picked Ash over him without a question in my mind. And I wasn’t sure I would ever do that.
Damn my heart for its ability to love more than one person at a time. Apparently my father’s blood ran truer than I’d previously believed. The royal lines of the Terralings were littered with mistresses and children born out of the monarch’s official marriage. That wasn’t unusual to us; it was normal as far as we were concerned. But I’d thought I was above that, only ever bedding Coal.
I grimaced at the thought of being anything like my father.
Cactus stepped beside me and slung an arm over my shoulders as we walked. “Wanderers like us, we never really settle down, Lark. So where do you think your pop is?”
“I don’t know.” I brushed his arm off, feeling the traitorous desire to leave it there. “We’re going to Niah’s to speak with her.”
“The old storyteller? Is she still alive?”
“She’s not that old.” I laughed, but the laughter died as I thought about Ash having to deal with Vetch. “Come on, I don’t want to waste time.”
We jogged to Niah’s, silence between us. Peta bounded through the forest, her pleasure flowing through the bond between her and me. Stopping suddenly, she pounced on something that squeaked, then let it go. She turned a sheepish face up to me. “Sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. I’m glad you like it here.”
We came to a stop at the edge of the Rim. Niah’s house was built into a redwood not unlike my previous home. Only instead of being fifty feet in the air as mine had been, the entrance to her home was on the ground. If I remembered correctly, she had a bear as a familiar that didn’t look a whole lot different than Karhu. Tangling with one bear was enough for me. I didn’t go to the door, but instead called out.
“Niah, are you here?”
There was silence for a moment, then the door swung open on well-greased hinges. Niah peered out, her long gray hair hanging in braids to either side of her face. “Larkspur?”
“Yes. I was hoping for some guidance.”
She peered at Cactus. “Why have you got a lizard with you?”
“This is my friend, Cactus. He’s a half-breed like me. He used to live here in the Rim as a child.”
She snorted. “Ain’t nobody like you, Lark. Come on in, bring your cat with you.”
“Your familiar won’t mind?”
That stopped her. “Why would my familiar mind yours?”
I closed the distance between us and held the edge of the door. “Vetch has been named the heir and has two of Father’s familiars. They attacked us.”
Niah gasped and put a hand to her throat. “Fool boy, what does he think he’s doing?”
“I think Cassava still has some hold on him.” I didn’t want to explain about Blackbird. We didn’t have time for a long story, and that was what Niah loved more than anything. Eating and storytelling.
The three of us stepped into her home. I had to blink several times to adjust to the dimmer light. The room cooked with heat from a fire roaring on one side of the room and a kettle squalling on the stove. Being late summer, it wasn’t exactly cold outside. Sweat popped out on my brow immediately.
More surprising than the fire was Griffin sitting in a chair, his long legs stretched out in front of him. His dark eyes swept over me as he gave me a toothy grin reminiscent of his wolf form. “Larkspur, keeping out of trouble yet?”
“Not yet,” I muttered, as I took a seat. Niah brought me a mug of tea without asking and I let out sigh. This would not be a quick visit. I wasn’t sure if that pleased me. A part of me wanted to hurry, to find my father and bring him home to straighten out Vetch. The other part didn’t want to find him at all. With my father gone, though, we would have to battle Vetch, and I didn’t want to start a civil war. . . but that would settle things. I was not so sure my father would be able to rule if his mind was broken as badly as we thought.
Peta jumped onto my lap and curled up so her tail wrapped over her nose. “Griffin.” Her voice was muffled through her fur.
“Kitten. What are you doing here?” He leaned forward and ran a single finger down her spine. She shivered, but she wasn’t bothered by his touch, or I would have pushed his hand away.
Her green eyes blinked up at me, then back at Griffin. “Long story. Your consort said I was needed, so I am here.”
His eyebrows shot up. “With Larkspur? Shit, she must be in for a wild ride then, yeah?”
I lifted my tea and took a sip, choosing not to respond. Niah waved her hands, fluttering them like bird wings. “Not a word until the boy sits down. His red hair makes me nervous.” She winked to soften the words, though I felt a thin string of truth running through them.
The distrust between our families ran deep and long.
Cactus laughed and sat beside me. “Nah, I’m not really a redhead. This is a new shade of brown.”
She grinned at him, and the tension broke.
“Niah, I need to find a Tracker.” I spit the words out before we could get sidetracked again. Or maybe before I decided to sit there and let my father rot wherever he was. “Can you help me? Or you, Griffin, if she can’t?”
The two of them looked at each other.
“I don’t know if we should help her,” Niah said as if I wasn’t even there. “She’d be breaking the rules again and that’s going to catch up to her at some point. She hasn’t even drank half her tea and she’s demanding answers.”
“I know, yeah? Kids these days, always wanting an answer quick.” Griffin folded his hands on the table. “But what happens if we don’t help her? Viv is playing games again, and I don’t like it. The least we can do is throw our weight behind the player we want to succeed, yeah?”
I glanced at Cactus, who shrugged and mouthed “old people.”
Peta snickered, her tiny body shaking on my lap.
Forcing myself to sit and wait was, to say the least, difficult. Patience was something I was learning. Rushing into this journey would not help me find my father.
I leaned back in my chair and closed my eyes.
“Where’s the best place to send them?” Niah asked.
Griffin gave a low grunt. “A Reader would be best, easier to find than a prickly Tracker, yeah? They move around like the wind.”
A teacup clinked as it was set down, the shifting of chairs and the succeeding creak of wood. Smoke from the fire tickled my nose and I breathed in, holding it in my lungs.
An irrational fear began in the soles of my feet that once I left the Rim this time, nothing would ever be the same in my life. That the things I saw through Spirit would be a sure thing. Yet another reason to take my time with this journey. To make sure I didn’t rush into anything I shouldn’t.
I opened my eyes to see Niah staring at me. I ran a finger along the rim of my teacup. “Have you decided, then?”
She nodded. “We will tell you where a young Reader lives. She was trained by a banished elemental and is quite good at what she does despite her age.”
Griffin tapped his fingers on the table, drawing my attention to him. “Her name is Giselle.”
They stared at me like her name should mean something, so I nodded. “Okay. Giselle. And the elemental who trained her?”
Peta sat up in my lap. As she did so, Niah trained her pale violet eyes on the cat. “Someone Peta knows rather well. But I don’t think you’re quite ready to meet him yet. Is she, cat?”
Peta stiffened slowly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Griffin barked out a laugh and slapped his hands on the table. “Fun. This is going to be fun, I think, yeah?”
“Do you know where Giselle is? Knowing her name is one thing, but I am no Tracker. I need more than a name to find someone.” There was no point in following the tangent they had gone off on. Things happened or they didn’t; either way, I would deal with them at the time.
Standing, Niah beckoned for me to follow her. I did so, and we headed deeper into the hollowed-out tree. She spoke softly over her shoulder as we walked. “She’s in the human city of Bismarck. North Dakota. The land there is empty of magic in many ways, but it is because of what is coming for the place in the future.”
A chill swept through me. “You aren’t going to tell me, are you?”
“No. Right now you need to find Giselle and find her quickly, because you are not the only one looking for the Tracker. Nor are you the only one looking for a true Reader. Giselle is one of few who can truly give a glimpse into what is coming, and already her talents are being noticed.” She took my hand and pressed it between both of hers. When she took her fingers away from mine I turned my hand up. Two items were in my palm. One was a fishhook earring, identical to the one she’d given me before I’d headed to the Deep. I’d lost the first one in a fight for my life against Requiem.
“Why do I need this?”
“It is magic that belongs in the Deep, Lark,” she said. I frowned. We knew my father wasn’t in the Deep. Finley had scoured her home for him, and I trusted her to tell the truth. The other item was far closer to my heart. The seed of a moringa plant. I rolled it in my hand. It would grow in poor soil with almost no water, and was edible, but it was not native to the redwoods, or North America for that matter.
“No point in asking what I need this for, is there?”
Smiling, she shook her head. Her eyes twinkled. “You’ll know when the time comes. I’m no Reader, Lark, but I listen when the promptings of the soul of the earth come to me. I suggest you do the same.”
She tipped her head. “The white stone you took from the Pit. Do you still have it?”
My eyebrows shot up. “Yes.”
“You’ll need it, Lark. When you least expect, that stone will save your life, I think.”
How a stone could save my life, I had no idea. But I trusted her.
Bending, I pulled her into a hug. “Thank you.”
With great care she pushed me away from her. “Don’t thank me, Lark. I am encouraging you to break rules. Rules that have been in place since the mother goddess first birthed our forbearers.”
I shifted my shoulders, then tucked the two items into my side pouch. “Yes, I know.”
“And you realize taboo, when broken, will bring you a punishment you will not be able to stave off?”
There was only one thing for me to say. “Yes. I know.”
“Good.” She tapped me on the arm. “It’s about time someone shook up our world. I’m glad it’s you.”
Her words caught me by surprise and I laughed. “Thank you?”
She pushed me toward where the men waited. “Pshaw. Be off with you now. You have a long journey ahead with several stops along the way. Do not rush, let the journey lead you where it will.”
Her words echoed my own desire and so I clung to them. I would not rush after my father, but go carefully.
At least, that was the plan.
Taking our leave of Niah and Griffin, we headed toward the Enders Barracks.
“I overheard what she said about this being a long journey,” Cactus said.
“And?”
“I mean, how hard can it be? We go to this Bismarck place, talk to a Reader, Travel to where she directs us . . .” He looked at me, but I said nothing. Peta swung a paw at him from my shoulder.
“Prick, you are a fool. The Reader is not going to simply give us directions. More likely some silly game we have to play and maybe require some form of payment. Readers don’t hand out their knowledge for nothing.”
Cactus’s face fell, and with the dimming of his smile, it was as if the light around us dimmed too. I lifted a hand to touch Peta’s side. “Go easy. Cactus could be right, we could end up finding the journey to be as straight as an arrow, and as quick.”
Peta’s mouth dropped open and incredulity flowed from her to me. I pressed a little harder against her, wanting her to understand. Part of what made Cactus Cactus was the joy he gave so freely to others. He grinned at me.
“That’s the spirit.”
Indeed.
I didn’t want him to lose that spark so early in the journey. Because I had a feeling I was going to be the one to take it from him at some point. Most likely when he found out about Ash and me.
Under my hand, Peta softened as if she heard the words in my mind, though she would pick up on only emotions. “Fine.”
The Rim hummed with energy when we returned. People flowed through the main thoroughfare, stopping and talking more so than usual. I grabbed the first person I recognized.
“Blossom, did something happen?”
The girl who’d been an Ender in training with me stopped and spun, a surprised look on her face. “Lark, you’d better get out of here. He’s looking for you. Go!”
I didn’t have to ask who or why. Vetch had to have broken free of the dungeon. I grabbed Cactus’s arm and bolted toward the barracks. Behind us, shouting erupted as someone spotted us. Not like we were hard to spot. At six feet, I was a good four inches taller than most of the men of the Rim with the exception of Ash, and Cactus with his red hair . . . we were easy to pinpoint.
Peta leapt from my shoulder. “I’ll slow them down.”
“I’m not going without you!” I said.
“Of course not.”
She let out a snarl as she shifted, covering our backs. Cactus and I raced into the barracks, though it was a struggle not to stop and face those who came for us. Could I have fought off the guards? Yes. But it wasn’t their fault Vetch was an idiot slug of a man. They didn’t deserve to be hurt because of the choices he made.
Too many had already died because of Cassava and her machinations. I didn’t want to add to the list.
Bursting through the barracks’ main doors, I stumbled to a halt when I saw what waited for us. Ash stood in the middle of the room, arms loaded with human clothes.
“You two don’t have a lot of time.” He threw jeans and a white T-shirt at Cactus. “Those should fit you. They’re from the last time I went into the human world.”
Cactus caught the clothes and quickly changed. Ash held out a tall pair of boots to me. “I think if you wear these, you should be okay. With your looks, the humans will forgive strange clothing.” He gave me a quick wink.
I took the boots and slipped them on. They laced all the way up to my knee, the soft leather cupping my calves. Made of a deep brown deerskin, they complimented my darker leather vest. Not that I was looking to be fashionable. I only needed to fit in enough so the humans didn’t notice me.
Ash crouched in front of me and helped me lace up the boots, his hands lingering on my legs. “Be careful, Lark.”
“I will.” I touched his head, running my fingers through his hair, forgetting for a moment we were not alone. Behind us the door burst open and Peta fell through. Her white and gray coat was flecked with blood.
Horror ripped through me. How could I have not felt her injuries? “Peta!”
“I’m fine, it isn’t my blood,” she panted. Cactus ran to the door and slid a bar through it.
“Time to go.” Ash grabbed me and spun me toward him. I knew a kiss when I saw it coming and I turned my head. It was one thing to love him, another to rub it in Cactus’s face. His lips caught my cheek and the surprise, then laughter in his eyes made me smile.
Cactus grabbed my hand and dragged me away toward the stairs and the Traveling room. I let him, but couldn’t take my eyes from Ash as we moved out. How had Cactus not noticed?
The boom of something heavy hitting the main doors snapped me out of my fog. I shook off Cactus’s hand and stepped into the lead. Stopping at my bedroom door, I grabbed a small leather bag I could tie to my belt. I looped it through and stuffed the trinkets Niah had given me in beside the smoky diamond that controlled air. The last thing to go in the bag was the white stone from the Pit. I didn’t hesitate, just stuffed it in knowing I could trust Niah.
I took a knife and tucked it into the top of my boot, then backed out and led the way down the hall again. Through it all, the silence from Cactus was as damning as if he’d screamed at me. Apparently he had noticed.
Beside me, Peta lent me her support, her furred body against my leg. I dropped a hand to touch the back of her neck. What a mess my heart was. Almost as bad as the mess my father had left in the Rim.
The doors to the Traveling room were wide open. I stepped inside and as always was for a moment awed by what was laid out in front of me. Situated like a globe, the room was completely round. It was as if we stood inside the world, and looked out toward the land and seas.
“Get that armband off the wall,” I said to Cactus as I reached up and touched the hovering image of the world. Flexing and tightening my fingers, I brought the image of North America closer and closer until I’d zeroed in on the badlands of North Dakota, and then tightened it further to the main, glowing city of Bismarck. Adjusting it ever so slightly, I held out a hand. Cactus set the armband on it and I slid it onto my other arm. Made of highly polished cedar wood, it resonated on my bicep, like a tuning fork. “Hang onto me.”
“You sure your boyfriend will be okay with this?” Cactus asked.
I turned my head to look at him. Okay, maybe glare was a more accurate term. “Seriously? You want to have that conversation right now?”
His jaw flexed. “Is he your boyfriend?”
“No. Now stop being a fool, Prick, and hang onto me.” I used Peta’s nickname for him and she snickered beside me as she wrapped a big paw around my calf.
He did as told and I reached up to touch the map over Bismarck with one finger, twisting the armband with my other hand. The world around us slipped away and I was tossed into a memory not my own.
Mother goddess, I kept forgetting about this hiccup of Traveling. As an added perk of having Spirit as one of my elements, whenever I Traveled with another person I was plunged into one of their memories.
I hoped for something from Peta.
I got a memory from Cactus.
The Rim was not as he remembered it. Beautiful, and flowing with plants and green things, that was the same. But the undercurrent reminded him more of the Pit. The feeling that people were afraid, that they didn’t see their home as safe anymore.
He frowned and ran a hand through his hair.
Catching a glimpse of long blonde hair and gently curved hips, he stopped in his tracks. A grin spread over his face. The rest of the world didn’t matter as long as Lark was here with him. Jogging, he tried to catch up with her, but in seconds she was gone.
The barracks. That had to be where she was headed. He made his way there, nodding to the Terralings who looked his way.
“Cactus, I need to speak with you.”
He spun, surprised to see Peta sitting on a log at eye level at the entrance to the barracks. “Bad luck cat, what do you want?”
She grimaced. “That is not my name, Prick.”
“Well, until you stop calling me Prick, that’s what I’m calling you.” Childish, he knew, but he couldn’t seem to help himself.
“You don’t love her the way she needs,” Peta said, shocking him.
“What do you mean? I love her. What else is there?”
Peta shook her head. “You love her, but love isn’t enough. Not with her life. Love is strong, Prick. But your love will not be what her heart needs. And certainly not the love you want to put on her. With expectations and rules and how you want her to be. I see it in you. She is not the woman who will settle down and give you a brood of children.”
He grinned at her, even as he struggled not to let her words affect him. “You don’t know that.”
“You see, you do not even deny my words.”
“Why would I? Of course, I would want to have children with her. That is what you do when you love someone.”
She snorted and started to groom her left paw, wiping it over her ear. “I’m her familiar, Prick. I can feel her heart and her needs. She doesn’t need you.”
Leaning toward her, he lowered his voice. “I don’t want her to need me. I want her to want me.”
Peta put her face so close to his he could feel the breath from her mouth. “Desire is not enough. Love is not enough. She will chose the mate who understands her and can help her through the trials she will face. You are not that one.”
Anger snapped through him and with it the Fire in his blood heated. “I am.”
“You’re not.” She let out a sigh and shook her head. “Go away, Prick. You are not needed here.”
The desire to lash out curled through him and he stepped back toward the forest and away from the barracks. Having Lark see him like this, angry and on the verge of losing control, was not what he wanted. All because of a few words that scared him, and made him think perhaps Peta was right.
He strode away from the barracks. “Stupid cat. You’re wrong. I know you are.”
Yet, he doubted, and in the doubt he wondered if he was chasing a ghost of the girl he’d known. A memory he’d let grow into a fantasy that didn’t mesh with reality.
What if Peta was right?
What if Lark didn’t love him?
