“I can’t believe her. I can’t believe her,” Roxy kept saying over and over again, and while I could empathize, her alarmed tone had captured Callie’s attention.
“Mommy? What’s wrong?”
I scooped her up and affected a carefree tone. “Hey, glamour girl, why don’t you go play with your dolls inside, okay?”
Our daughter nodded, grinning as if the whole debacle of Leona’s visit hadn’t bothered her in the least. I ushered her into her room, made sure she was preoccupied with the dolls, then turned to check on Roxy just as I heard the front door open and close.
The mother of my child wandered in, rubbing her arms over her hoodie and looking shell-shocked. Keeping half an ear out for Callie, I took Roxy’s hand and led her over to her wooden kitchen table. Once settled, she started to nibble on her thumbnail. “I know you’re upset, Rox. I am, too.”
“But do you know what this means? My mother fucked with my cell so I couldn’t get your calls or texts. She trashed your letters. I believed you dumped me, that you left me high and dry for all these years because of what she did. Because of her.”
“She’s not the only one culpable,” I reminded her. And I needed to determine precisely what had transpired between Leona Miller and my parents.
“Do you think they really paid my mom to keep us separate?”
“I don’t know,” I said, but the more I thought about it, the more it made sense.
James and Valerie Liddell had always hated me being with Roxanne Miller, the girl from the wrong side of the tracks, even if I never thought they’d stoop to something so low at the time. Yet they’d sent me to another continent without warning, giving me no time to prepare or even to say goodbye.
Them severing all my methods of contact with Roxy to get her out of my life would be unforgivable, especially given the circumstances. And as much as I hadn’t gotten along with my parents, knowing what I knew now and looking back with hindsight made me realize that it was possible.
Roxy’s mother may well have done what she had at my mom and dad’s behest.
Which meant I needed to make an appointment with my own mother.
Valerie Liddell sat primly on her Queen Anne chair, looking as put together and affluent as any fine Southern lady could hope to be. Her auburn hair had been painstakingly coiffed, her makeup diligently applied, and her upscale boutique skirt set professionally pressed. She appeared to be what she was. Old money.
But now I suspected there was more to my mother than met the eye, and that this hidden facet of hers was anything but nice.
“Jaxson,” she said, doing that air kiss thing that I so despised. It was so fake, such an affectation. “How are you?”
Do you even care? The question popped into my mind. When I was in London, I was visited twice a year by my mother. Once on my birthday and then every Christmas. She’d never invited me to come home, nor had she communicated on a regular basis other than the occasional text or email.
I thought about how I felt about Callie and how I enjoyed being with her. Neither of my parents had ever shown me more than minimal affection. Yet I loved hugging my daughter. I loved playing with her, holding her, carrying her, tickling her. I loved watching her sleep and sharing meals with her. I couldn’t imagine treating that precious little girl like my parents had treated me.
“I have a question for you,” I said, putting all conjecture aside. I might not have felt close to my mother, but I felt certain that if I asked her something point-blank, she’d feel compelled to answer. And if she lied to me, I also felt certain that I’d be able to tell.
“Anything, darling.”
Darling. The endearment rang as false.
“I need you to be honest with me.”
“Well, of course I’ll be honest,” she said, blinking and shaking her head as if offended that I’d even consider any other alternative to be the case.
Uh huh. “Did you and Dad send me to London to end my relationship with Roxanne Miller?”
Keeping her knees carefully together, she stood and crossed the room to the wet bar. “Would you like something to drink?”
“What I’d like are answers.”
Her blue eyes caught mine. I’d inherited those eyes from her, just as Callie had inherited hers from me. Yet other than that lone physical feature, I didn’t feel like my mother and I had much in common. “Very well.” She took her time pouring out a brandy then sat back down in her chair. “Your father and I decided you would be better served by pursuing a different association than one with her.”
“You two decided,” I parroted back at her, trying to maintain my calm. “Without considering how I felt about the situation.”
“You were eighteen, Jaxson. Still a boy. Dallying with such an unsuitable girl long-term would never have been appropriate. Once we realized how much time you’d been spending in her company, we realized we needed to intervene.”
“Yet you had no problem whatsoever throwing me to wolves in London. I hadn’t even gotten a degree or had any sort of business training beyond high school, Mother. It’s a wonder I didn’t straight out fail.”
“You managed,” she said proudly, her eyes glittering. “You’ve always had tremendous potential and intelligence. Your father and I knew you’d make it.”
I scrubbed my knuckles through my hair then down my goatee, doing my best not to fly off the handle, but my hands were shaking with suppressed wrath. Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath, then another. “Do you have any idea what your meddling has done? How much you cost me?”
Mother fluffed her hand in the air as if batting away a mosquito. “Is all this melodrama really necessary, son?”
“Considering that I only recently got to meet my almost five-year-old daughter, I think I’m exhibiting a herculean amount of restraint.”
Startled, her fluttering hand landed at her throat, her eyes zeroing in on mine. “Daughter?”
“You going to stand there and tell me you didn’t know?” I snapped out, the release of my wrath breaking across me like an out of control wildfire. “Your grandchild. Calliope Jacqueline Miller, the baby I fathered with Roxy.” My movements jerky, I rushed toward my mother, showing her one of the many photographs I’d shot of Callie and me with my phone.
She gaped at it like a codfish, then reached out to seize my cell, but I pocketed it before she could. It was no less than she deserved.
“But I…”
“You what?” I shouted so loudly it felt like a razor down my throat. “You and Dad must’ve had a good time playing God with your only son, must’ve enjoyed damn near ruining my life. I thought Roxy rejected me for no apparent reason, but that’s not what happened at all. It almost destroyed me to lose her.”
“Then,” I went on, “no thanks to you, I came back and found out about Callie. Do you have any idea how it feels to be lied to by people I’m supposed to be able to trust, by people who are supposed to love me? Do you know how devastating it is to realize how much I missed?” My face felt hot, as if someone had pepper sprayed it. “You’re responsible for that. You.”
Suddenly, I couldn’t stand to be in the same room with my mother. I couldn’t stand to be in the same house. I did an abrupt about-face and strode toward the grand staircase that led to the marbled entryway, needing to get out.
“Jaxson? I didn’t know about her. I swear.” Her voice sounded beseeching, remorseful, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t. It had come from her too little and too late.
She’d followed me out to the landing at the top of the staircase. I paused with my back still turned to her, huffing out a laugh utterly devoid of humor. “Oddly enough, I don’t believe you.”
“Son…”
Then, I looked at her. I sent her such a glare of loathing that she took a step back. “Don’t call me son or darling or any of that other bullshit. I know it’s not real. And don’t expect to ever meet your grandchild, either. I’m not letting you treat her like you’ve treated me.”
Feeling as if I couldn’t breathe, I hurtled down the steps two at a time, knowing that I would never return.
After I arrived back at Roxy’s apartment, I knocked on her door. Raina materialized in a bathrobe, yawning widely and giving me the impression that I’d awakened her. At her displeased expression, I glanced at my watch to check the time. The dial read after midnight.
What the hell was I doing here?
“Can I help you?” Raina asked me, her tone brusque.
Normally, someone speaking to me with such a tone would bring out my more aggressive tendencies, but tonight, I wasn’t myself. I felt as if I’d been on a roller coaster that kept going downward in endless descending loops. I couldn’t find my footing, and I couldn’t seem to stop the spiraling momentum. I stood at Roxy’s threshold as if on a precipice, unable to foster any sort of rational decision on whether to stay or go.
Luckily, the woman I loved appeared behind her roommate. Her chestnut hair tumbled down around her shoulders and her exquisite features lit up the moment she saw me. Then, she studied me more carefully, and a V marred the lovely expanse of her forehead. I didn’t know what she saw in my face, but she tugged me inside, yanking me into an embrace.
Closing my eyes, I breathed her in, already feeling better.
“I shouldn’t have come over here so late,” I apologized, even while I knew I didn’t want to go anywhere else. My voice sounded as if I’d swallowed a full-sized container of Drano.
“You went to speak to your mom.” She didn’t make this a question.
“Yes, and I don’t plan to speak to her ever again.”
She sighed, running her fingers through the hair at the nape of my neck. “Sounds pretty harsh.”
“That woman deserves harsh. Leona told us the truth. My parents manipulated her into fucking with the mail and your cell. But they were the masterminds. They’re the ones who tore us apart. They’re the ones who overnighted me to the U.K. like a goddamn priority mail package.” I heard the bitterness in my voice but couldn’t curb it.
“We’re together now.”
“But we could’ve been together all along.”
“Why are you more upset now than you were before?” she asked me.
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s because I thought I was living my own destiny, when instead, they controlled me like some marionette on a string. I mean, think about all that we missed out on. I didn’t get to be there for your pregnancy or for Callie’s birth. I didn’t get to support you while she was struggling in the hospital. I didn’t get to see her roll over or crawl or walk for the first time. I didn’t get to hear her first word. It was bad enough when I thought it was a misunderstanding between the two of us but knowing that my parents were so willing to steal our happiness to meet some psycho agenda of their own... Who does shit like that?”
“They always scared me,” Roxy confessed.
“Why?” Had they threatened her in some way?
“Because they hated me so much. Because they had so much power over us back then.”
“Well, no more. I’m never setting foot in that mansion again. As far as I’m concerned, they’re no longer my family. You’re worth so much more to me than they are. I’d rather walk away from Liddell Enterprises and deny my inheritance than allow their interference to impact you or Callie.”
She rubbed my back in soothing circles. “It’s going to be okay. We’ll just establish our own family.”
Yes. Yes, we would.