Chapter 6

Appa’s gone! We finally have good news to celebrate, and this happens! I’ve come to count on him to carry us everywhere and save us when we’re in trouble. I don’t know what we’ll do without him in this desert, in this heat. Poor Aang. Appa’s not just a pet or a ride; he’s Aang’s family, his best friend. This is awful. How many loved ones can one person lose?

“How could you let Sandbenders take Appa?” Aang screamed at Toph.

I guess while we were in the library a group of Sandbenders–Earthbenders who can manipulate sand–captured Appa.

“I couldn’t stop them,” she cried. “The library was sinking and I was trying to keep it up. I can hardly feel any vibrations in the sand, so I can’t see. They snuck up on me and–”

“You just didn’t care!” Aang yelled. “You never liked Appa. You wanted him gone!”

Wait, I know Toph has rubbed us all the wrong way at times, but Aang’s not being fair. I know he’s upset, but yelling at Toph isn’t going to bring Appa back. “Aang, stop it! You know Toph did all she could. She saved our lives!”

“I’m going after Appa,” Aang announced, opening his glider and taking off.

“We’ll never make it out of here,” Sokka moaned.

Aang’s gone, Toph feels horrible, and Sokka is losing hope. I can’t let everyone give up. It’s not just about us surviving. It’s about the survival of the whole world. “We’d better start walking. We’re the only people who know about the solar eclipse. We have to get that information to Ba Sing Se.”

Sometimes I wish there was someone for me to lean on … but this is just the way it is. I have to keep us together. I have to get this information to the Earth King. I just have to.

We’re practically out of water. Everyone is hot and exhausted. Still, we have to keep moving. We’ve got to find a way out of the desert.

There’s Aang! He’s come back … alone. “I’m sorry, Aang. I know it’s hard for you, but we need to focus on getting out of here.”

“What’s the difference?” he replied. “We won’t survive without Appa. We all know it.”

I can’t let his despair make the others lose all hope. “Come on, Aang, we can do this if we work together. Right, Toph?”

“As far as I can feel, we’re trapped in a giant bowl of sand pudding. I got nothing.”

Sokka is stretched out on his back, staring up at some circling birds.

It’s up to me, then. I’m not letting them give up and just sit here waiting for the end! “We are getting out of this desert and we’re going to do it together. Aang, get up. Everybody hold hands!”

On we trudged until night began to fall. “I think we should stop for the night.”

“Appa!” Aang cried as he looked up.

“Sorry, Aang. It’s just a cloud.” I really wish it were more than a cloud–a cloud! That means water! “Aang, fly up and bend the water from that cloud into my pouch.”

Aang snatched the pouch from my hand impatiently, opened his glider, and flew up toward the cloud. I know he’s upset, but really, his behavior isn’t fair. No matter, here he is with the pouch. At least now we have water.

Huh, it feels awfully light. “Wow. There’s hardly any water in here.”

“I’m sorry, okay!” Aang shouted angrily. “It’s a desert cloud. I did all I could. What’s anyone else doing? What are YOU doing?”

He is so angry, so uncontrolled. I know he’s sad about Appa, but it’s not like I don’t know what it feels like to lose a loved one. He’s certainly not going to get through it by alienating the people who are still here for him. If I could wish Appa back here, I’d do it in a second. But I can’t.

“I’m trying to keep everyone together.”

Just then Toph stubbed her toe on something in the sand. It turned out to be a buried sandsailer, the vehicle Sandbenders use to glide along the desert, using wind power.

“Aang, you can bend a breeze into the sails to make it move. We’re going to make it!”

We dug out the sailer and set off across the desert. But we soon ran into some Sandbenders who accused us of stealing their sailer.

“I recognize the voice of one of the Sandbenders,” Toph said. “He’s the one who stole Appa!”

“Where is he?” Aang shouted at the Sandbenders. “Where’s my bison?”

Aang’s going crazy! He’s blasting the Sandbender’s gliders to pieces. I’ve never seen him so angry. He may actually hurt someone.

“Tell me where he is. Now!” Aang screamed.

“It wasn’t me!” the Sandbender cried, obviously frightened by Aang’s rage.

“You’re the one who said to put a muzzle on him!” Toph said.

“You muzzled Appa?!” Aang yelled.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know it belonged to the Avatar!” the Sandbender admitted. “I traded him to some nomads. He’s probably in Ba Sing Se by now. They were going to sell him there.”

Aang’s eyes are going blank. His tattoos are glowing. Now the wind is whipping up all around him. He’s so furious, he’s slipping into the Avatar state. His power is unbelievably strong, but completely out of control. It’s like a giant tornado is surrounding him, spreading in all directions.

“Run!” Sokka shouted, grabbing Toph and pulling her away from Aang.

No. Not me. I’m not running away from Aang. I’m going right through the tornado funnel. I don’t care how dangerous it might be. Aang needs me and I’m not letting him down. Just reach up and–got him! Now he’s looking down at me. See, he’s coming back down. He just needs to know that I’m here for him. After everything he’s done, everything he’s meant to me, it’s the least I can do. I am not letting go.

There, the wind is calming down. He’s coming out of the Avatar state. It’s okay, Aang. I’m here. And I’m not going anywhere.

Aang’s mood seemed to improve as we made our plans to travel to Ba Sing Se. On a map from the spirit library Sokka found a route along a narrow strip of land called Serpent’s Pass. Then we met a family of refugees, including a pregnant woman named Ying who told us about a much safer route, by ferry. Unfortunately the refugee family’s passports and tickets were stolen at the ferry port, and it was back to Serpent’s Pass. Before we left the ferry port, Sokka ran into Suki, a Kyoshi warrior who we had met earlier in our travels. I think Sokka really likes her. She’s here working as a security guard, but decided to come along with us. She must like him, too!

At the entrance to the pass there’s a sign. “It says ‘Abandon hope.’”

It’s so strange. Hope is what’s kept me going through the darkest times, like our journey across the desert, and right after my mom passed away. Sometimes hope is all you have.

“The monks used to say that hope is just a distraction,” Aang said. “Maybe we do need to abandon it.”

“What are you talking about, Aang?”

“Hope isn’t going to get us into Ba Sing Se, and it’s not going to find Appa. We need to focus on what we’re doing right now, and that’s getting across this pass.”

Aang is usually so positive about things. He’s always the one saying that everything’s going to work out. I’d hate to think he’s lost hope completely. But whatever he needs to do to lead us to Ba Sing Se, I’ll support him. And this is just temporary, I’m sure of it. “Okay, Aang. If you say so.”

That night at our campsite I found Aang, alone, staring off into the water. He may be telling everyone that he’s okay now, but I know him. He’s not himself. And he seems to be in total denial about what happened to Appa.

“You know, it’s okay to miss Appa. I don’t know what’s going on with you. In the desert all you cared about was finding him. Now it’s like you don’t care about him at all.”

“You saw what I did out in the desert. I was so angry about losing Appa, I couldn’t control myself. I hated feeling like that.”

“But now you’re not letting yourself feel anything. I know sometimes it hurts more to care, but promise me you won’t stop caring.”

He’s so quiet. I hated seeing him so angry before, but at least he was feeling something. “Come on. You need a hug.”

I’m standing here, arms wide open, and he’s just standing still.

“Thank you for your concern, Katara,” he said, bowing. Then he walked away.

Aang’s turning down a hug? And he’s being so formal, so cold. It’s like he flipped off the switch that allows him to feel, and the sweet, sensitive guy I’ve come to know and care about so much has just gone away. I guess I’ll give him his space for now. It just makes me so sad to see him like this, but we all have to grieve in our own way. He’ll come around, I know it.

The next morning we came to a huge body of water. The only way to cross this is if I literally part the water so we can walk through.

“Single file, everyone,” I called out.

It seems like it’s working–we just have to get to the other side. Okay, we’re halfway there. … Wait, what’s that?

Suddenly the water went black; all the fish are swimming away. … AHH! It’s a giant serpent. I’ve never seen anything so gigantic in my life! It’s attacking us. I lost our safety bubble. We’re about to get soaked–THOOMP!

Phew! Toph Earthbended a huge sand platform and lifted it into the air, above the water. At least everyone is safe. Now Aang and I have to battle this serpent. Aang’s distracting it. If I just bend the water into ice, everyone can just walk across the ice to the other side! It’s working, but now I have to help Aang. I can’t let him battle the monster alone! Take that! WHOOSH! And that! THWACK! Aang is spinning that way. I’ll spin the other way until the monster is so dizzy he–BOOM!

He knocked right into the rocks, and now he’s going back where he came from!

Just when I thought things had settled down, Ying’s baby decided to come! I used to help my Gran Gran deliver lots of babies back home, so it’s up to me to take charge. “Aang, get some rags. Sokka, water. Toph, I need you to make an earth tent–a big one.”

Toph raised a large stone tent.

“Suki, come with me.”

A short while later, Ying and her husband, Tahn, were the proud parents of a baby girl. I stepped outside the tent and found Aang sitting there with his head buried in his hands.

“Aang, you have to come see this,” I said, pulling him into the tent.

Look at him, staring at the baby. Oh, gosh, he’s crying! He’s feeling something again.

“I’ve been going through a really hard time lately. But you’ve made me hopeful again.”

“Hope,” Ying said. “That’s what we will name our baby.”

“I thought I was trying to be strong, but I was really just running away from my feelings,” Aang told me. “Seeing this family together, so full of love, reminded me how I feel about Appa. And how I feel about you.”

That’s so sweet of him! I knew he’d bounce back. Now he’s off to try to find Appa in Ba Sing Se. We’re going to go straight to the king. I’m sure we’ll meet up with him really soon. Off he goes! Suki is leaving too. Sokka must be sad.

We are finally here–Ba Sing Se’s outer gate. It’s time to find the Earth King.