Bitter/Sweet Victory

Long middle finger

in my mouth

the way I imagine it is done

by those bulimics in Mom’s old class notes.

Breathing through my nose,

this seems silly,

but then. I feel the thick sweet mass

pushing up and out

splashing into the bowl,

cold toilet water sneezing in my face.

The blob floats slowly down

to the mouth at the other end and

I am     saved.