Chapter Thirty Seven

 

 

Q. How did you feel after that walk.

A. Exhilarated. I rode the adrenalin high for at least two weeks, thinking about him, how hard he was, how severely he spanked, whether it was his scene or not! And the screwing afterwards, well, beats Niall and Mark any old day of the week!

Q. And Annie?

A. That was the odd thing. She got insanely jealous of me! It was all her idea, she wanted me to go out, me to take the risk, the pain, the terror of finding someone so she could view it through my thoughts and my eyes, then when I did it and it worked out as she wanted, she got jealous! Because I think it worked out better than she thought, I actually enjoyed the whole think, in retrospect, of course. At the time I was simply terrified. But later I walked around wearing a smug grin and feeling very satisfied, and she hated it.

Q. And your parents never found out?

A. If they did they never said a word. Actually we were getting more and more distant from each other, a coolness had crept in, I’m sure they still loved us but they were puzzled by us, or something. Anyway, they spent more and more time away from home, and from each other. Separation was definitely looming, I could see it a mile off. Annie could too, and she gloated over it. Another punishment, another paying back for what she visualised they had done to us.

Q. There was a holiday, wasn’t there -

A. We’re getting close to the end now, aren’t we? You’re getting closer to what you want to know and I’m about to tell you anyway. Yes, there was a holiday planned. Florida. Brochures everywhere, suitcases arriving, new ones! And Mother flapping around like - well, I don’t quite know what she was like. You see, Annie and I refused to go with them. We gave the excuse that they were in need of ‘quality time together’ so they could rediscover one another. It’s as close as Annie dared go to saying she knew they were on the verge of separating. Now, a holiday can do one of two things, bring people closer together or drive them further apart. She was sure it would drive them further apart. So, because we weren’t going, Mother had to get loads of food in the freezer and arrange for someone to call round, all that kind of thing. Panic panic

Q. And did it drive them further apart?

A. You’ll have to answer that. In the light of what happened, there’s no way we could know is there?

Q. You girls stayed home.

A. We were almost 19 by then, grown up adult people capable of taking care of the house and ourselves. We said. And we were, or should have been.

Q. And Annie planned -

A. You’re guessing, but you’re right. Annie planned a party. With me as the centre of attraction. We talked about it far into the night, both of us busy with vibrators and visions, oh what a time we had planning it!

Q. And a time you had during the party, it did take place, didn’t it?

A. Sure did! Actually we had two parties, one for our real friends, Mark, Niall and a few girls and boys we knew from College and discos, from around Salldown. That was a good one, just an enjoyable party, plenty of music and food, we had a ‘bring a bottle or food’ policy and it worked out very well. No one got drunk everyone danced and had a good time, and we cleaned up the next day better than the house had been cleaned before, we got behind the furniture and did the skirting board and everywhere.

Q. But the other party?

A. The other party was a week later and was when it all happened. And I mean all.