Chapter Fifteen

The Patience of Detours

If the truth be told, and we were all being totally frank, most of us do not like to wait.

Sure, we can pretend that we are patient here or there—and act all spiritual—but deep down inside, patience is a virtue that is often difficult to come by. Particularly if we are waiting for something we want to change or for something we need to improve and get better. Waiting can be a frustrating experience.

Have you ever been at a red light that won’t seem to ever go to green? You feel stuck. Trapped. Held back from where you want to go. The circumstance in front of you simply won’t let you move forward. Or, how about being stuck behind a slow-moving vehicle on a narrow road that won’t provide room to pass?

Perhaps you’ve sat in the waiting room of a doctor’s office, and they just keep calling everyone else’s name except yours. What’s worse is when you are in an emergency room, and you are in pain. Yet, they are telling you they will get to you when they can. They are literally forcing you to wait while you are frightened and in pain.

How about this? Have you ever been on the phone, and the person on the other line asks you to hold and then plays music? We all have, at some point or another. It may only be minutes, but it can feel like hours as you sit and listen to music that really should never be called music at all.

All of those kinds of waiting are inconvenient. All of them try our patience. They can strip the smile straight off our face. But really the worst kind of waiting there is comes when you or I have to wait on God.

When God forces you to wait for things to get better in your life, for things to improve, for your change to come. It is in these times when it feels as if nothing is happening, and God has put your life in neutral. Your motor is running, but the wheels aren’t turning. That can cause the most pain.

God never seems to be in a hurry when we are, does He? He’s like the proverbial parent who insists on cooking and eating breakfast before the Christmas presents can be unwrapped. We wonder, “What gives, God? Don’t You see how much I want to get to my destiny? I’m here. I’m ready. Why are You taking so long?”

It’s like the boy who was praying, “Dear Lord, I need the snow. I want it to snow. It’s winter. It’s Christmas. I want it to snow.” Day after day he prayed for snow. But still there came no snow. “God,” the boy continued after weeks, “You don’t want me to become an atheist, do You? Because I’m asking for snow but there is no snow!”

Sometimes it seems that God takes so long that you can begin to wonder if believing in Him is even reasonable. You begin to wonder if it’s even worth the effort. What’s the upside to this thing called faith, God? You’ve got me waiting too long for my destiny, my mate, my healing, my hope . . . you name it. It’s taking too long, and I’m beginning to wonder if I should even keep waiting at all.

You talk to Him.

You pray to Him.

You made a prayer closet.

It did no good.

You go to church.

You still feel empty and stuck.

You worship, but nothing has changed.

After a while you begin to feel that the relationship is too one-sided. Then, when things get even worse, you may even consider pulling back. Withholding worship, prayer, devotion—because it just doesn’t make much sense anymore.

The clock keeps ticking. The years keep changing. The calendar keeps moving. God keeps delaying His response.

Most of us are like Habakkuk in times like these when he cries out to the Lord, “How long, O Lord, will I call for help, and You will not hear?” (Hab. 1:2 nasb). God’s response doesn’t offer much by way of comfort. We see it in the next chapter:

Then the Lord answered me and said, “Record the vision and inscribe it on tablets, that the one who reads it may run. For the vision is yet for the appointed time; it hastens toward the goal and it will not fail. Though it tarries, wait for it; For it will certainly come, it will not delay.” (Hab. 2:2–3 nasb, emphasis mine )

God promises the prophet the vision will not fail. But He also lets him know “it tarries.” He also reminds him to “wait for it.” He doesn’t tell him how long. He doesn’t give him a sign. He just says it will one day come, so wait.

It’s like fishing in a pond where nothing seems to bite. You can stand there or sit there for hours, tossing line after line into the water. Hooking worm after worm onto the line. Ultimately, it may feel like you are no longer fishing—you are just cruelly drowning worms. Waiting for your destiny—for your change, for your hope to happen—can feel like drowning sometimes. Your dreams are drowning. Your desires are drowning. Your thoughts are drowning. Your opportunity is drowning. Nothing seems to be hooking onto the hope you toss out time and time again. And in your private moments—those moments alone that only you and God share—you may even feel like bailing. Pulling the line out of the water and just walking away.

Holding patterns in life are just as frustrating, just like holding patterns on a flight. You just circle and circle and circle and circle. And your soul loses the hope to even hope for something different. Yet over and over again in the Bible we are told to “wait on the Lord.” It is not something that appears once or twice. The phrase and concept to “wait on the Lord” is a frequent occurrence. In Psalm 130:5–6 (nasb) it says, “I wait for the Lord, my soul does wait, and in His word do I hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than the watchmen for the morning; Indeed, more than the watchmen for the morning.”

“More than the watchmen for the morning.” Think about that. If you’ve even known or seen a watchman—or even been one—morning can’t come too soon. Yet it’s like the watched pot that never boils; . . . it delays and delays and delays. This is how the psalmist says he waits. This is how we are to wait as well.

With anticipation.

With hope.

With longing.

With expectation.

With desire.

With faith and obedience.

These things, and more, dissipate doubt. It dissolves despair. As we read in Psalm 27:13–14 (nasb), “I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; yes, wait for the Lord.”

In Lamentations we find a benefit to waiting well, “The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the person who seeks Him. It is good to wait quietly” (Lam. 3:25–26). God is good to those who wait well. But what does it mean to wait well? How should we wait on the Lord in such a way that we receive His goodness at the end of the day? Does it mean to sit in a rocking chair and hope something better happens? Does it mean to stop talking altogether? When have we prayed enough? When have we done enough? When are we supposed to do something?

None of those questions has an exact answer for each and every situation. The answer can vary depending on the situation. But, overall, to wait on the Lord means not to go outside of God to fix the issue you are waiting for. To not “pull an Abraham” and go find yourself a “Hagar” to try and solve the situation yourself. To wait on the Lord is to wait on His hand, His intervention—His guidance, His provision, His power, and His solution. Don’t try and cobble together your destiny yourself. Don’t try to force it into place. When it is God’s time for you to fulfill your destiny, you will fulfill it perfectly. Rather than take matters into your own hands, leave them in God’s. As the saying goes, “Let go. And let God.”

James 5:7–8 talks about this a bit, although in a different context: “Therefore, brothers, be patient, until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the precious fruit of the earth and is patient with it until it receives the early and late rains. You also must be patient. Strengthen your hearts, because the Lord’s coming is near.” Just as a farmer must wait for the rains and the soil to produce the growth of the seed, we must also wait for the Lord to produce within us and through us the purpose He intends.

You have heard of the endurance of Job and how God rewarded his patience through giving him twice what he had before. The Lord is full of compassion and mercy to those who will learn and practice the skill and art of waiting well. One of the ways you will know you have not yet perfected this art of waiting well is if you spend a lot of your time complaining.

A person who has a complaining spirit—someone who has a pattern of whining about a situation or about God—is not waiting well. Complaining reveals a lack of faith. Complaining reveals a heart seeking a solution more than the lesson on the journey to the solution. Now, instead of God being your deliverer, He must be your judge.

Never go outside of God to try and make happen what you are waiting on Him to make happen. Because when you do, you will only delay it happening. Scripture is replete with examples of people delaying the deliverance of their destiny because they tried to get there on their own. Abraham and Sarah had to wait twenty-five years before the promise of a child. The delay came because they went to the flesh to solve a situation of the spirit. Martha and Mary had to wait as Jesus intentionally delayed performing the miracle of raising their brother from the dead because their doubts, and subsequent faith, would be used to teach others for years to come.

Delays aren’t always a cause for intervention. They are often a place to teach us something God wants us to learn or to receive something God wants us to receive first. Jesus told the disciples to go to Jerusalem and wait for the Holy Spirit before they went out to minister on His behalf. Hannah had to wait years before she got her first child. Ruth had to wait before she got her husband.

Part of the Christian experience, at various segments of our lives, is this one of waiting. Waiting on timing. Waiting on divine hookups. Waiting on preparation. Waiting on other people. Waiting on ourselves. Waiting on development. Waiting on . . . waiting.

Waiting on God means not going outside of God to resolve the issue.

It also means obeying God as you wait. Based on His revealed will from His Word, obey what you know. Because you will never see what God plans to do in secret unless He sees you obeying what He has already revealed. God never tells you everything He is going to do, but He has told you something. Whatever it is, obey that. However small, however insignificant it may seem—obey that. Do what you know to do even if you don’t know what it is doing for you.

When you are sick, you go to the doctor, and if she finds an infection, she writes you a prescription. Guess what the doctor expects you to do in your pain while you are waiting to get better? Take medicine. She doesn’t expect you to read about the medicine. She doesn’t expect you to talk about the medicine. She doesn’t even expect you to understand what the medicine is and how it works. Just take the medicine and let it work. Just do what the doctor told you to do and let the outcome present itself in time. When you or I take medicine, we wait for it to work. It is never instant.

But keep in mind, the longer you put off taking the medicine, the longer it will take for the medicine to work.

Far too many Christians like to talk to other people about what God’s Word says. We like to think about it. Consider it. But very few will act on it.

Very few will live with the faith that tells us not to worry. Very few will forgive with a grace that tells us not to carry a grudge. Very few will go to a place we have never seen before, or leave the security of what we know for one where God is directing.

God, the Great Physician, has prescribed what we need in His Word. Whether or not we follow what He has revealed—things like love, forgiveness, trust, faith, hope, and more—will determine how long it takes for us to wait.

Learning to wait well involves learning how to put into practice the everyday-ness of living as a child of God.

When did Job get God’s reward and double blessing? After he prayed for his friends. After he showed grace and kindness to those who had brought him pain during his greatest moments of pain. Job followed the law of love and asked God to give goodness to others. When he did that, God gave goodness to Job.

Learning to wait well involves learning how to put into practice the everyday-ness of living as a child of God. It means putting into practice those things we already know. Forgiving. Loving. Believing. Working as unto the Lord, even if it’s not your favorite place to work. Honoring the authority over you, even if you don’t particularly like or respect him. Bearing one another’s burdens, even when you feel weighed down by your own.

Do what God has already said to do.

Then watch Him usher you to your destiny.

My son Anthony came home from school one day with an assignment. This assignment involved planting a seed in a small pot, watering it, and watching it grow. It was an assignment for his science class. Anthony dutifully put his seed in the soil in the pot on Friday night then went about his normal play and evening business. When he woke up on Saturday, he ran to the window to look at the pot. Nothing had happened. Nothing had grown. Anthony came to me disappointed because the seed had yielded nothing overnight.

I had to explain to Anthony that this wasn’t Jack’s magic beans, which would grow into a vine reaching to the heavens overnight. This was a seed. And as with all seeds, it would take time to grow. It would require waiting, in faith. Watering, in faith. Watching, in faith.

This concept of waiting is very interesting when you break it down to its literal meaning. The concept in biblical times was used of strands that were plaited together, interwoven to make something bigger, brighter, and more whole. The word wait can refer to pulling together the strands of God’s revealed will in an effort to tighten them up until something bigger is brought about through the combination of all things.

Waiting requires time. I’m sorry to have to stick with that truth. But it’s true. So the sooner we accept it as true, the sooner we can learn to do it well.

Just like Anthony’s seed beneath the soil, something was happening. It’s not that nothing at all was taking place. It’s just that nothing that Anthony could see was taking place. What was happening was occurring in secret underneath the dirt. And it would need to remain there until the right time it was to emerge.

When God is silent, He is not still. But a lot of His activity and a lot of His purposes are being woven underneath the dirt of our days. It is growing there out of our sight and in ways we cannot see—until such a time, within the confines of His purposes and His will, He is ready to reveal it.

Wait, my friend. Wait well.

Joseph’s story ought to encourage you that it will one day be worth it.

Wait well.