The codfish lays ten thousand eggs,

The homely hen lays one.

The codfish never cackles

To tell you what she’s done.

And so we scorn the codfish,

While the humble hen we prize,

Which only goes to show you

That it pays to advertise.

—Anonymous

I know that half the money I spend on advertising is wasted, and the trouble is I don’t know which half.

—Lord Leverhulme

CLIENT: What time is it?

AGENCY: What time would you like it to be?

—attributed to many agencies,
and denied by all