We walk back inside, and I notice Plath standing at the top of the stairs, his arms crossed over his chest and standing tall like he’s somebody important.

“What are you two doing out of your rooms?” He asks as he looks at Kyle and avoids me.

Kyle laughs coldly but doesn’t respond. He motions for me to follow him up the stairs, so I continue walking. Not because I want to follow him but because I don’t know my way back to my room.

We get to the top where Plath is standing. He looks in my direction for a brief moment, careful to keep his expression emotionless, then back at Kyle. I continue to follow Kyle and discretely turn my head to look back at Plath. When I don’t see him there anymore, I turn back around.

I sigh heavily as we continue walking towards our rooms. Sleep sounds nice, but how in the hell am I supposed to sleep with everything that’s going on? I look up and see the sign for our hall and walk past Kyle to go to my room. Before I open my door, I turn to look at Kyle, but he is already in his room.

I close my door quietly behind me then go sit on my bed. I lay my head back on my pillow and hear a crinkling sound again. I reach my hand under it and pull out another note:

 

I came to talk to you, but you were gone. Do NOT leave this room again unless instructed to do so.

- P

 

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out these are from Plath. I crumple the paper and hold it in my fist. I’m so confused. Why is he acting like he cares? If he cared, he wouldn’t he have handed me over to the Constable. I get out of bed and put the note in the toilet. I watch it go down after pulling the lever.

Once back in bed, I cover myself and close my eyes. Images of Sage and my father play in my mind. This is my fault. Every damn bit of it. None of this would have happened if I didn’t eavesdrop that night.

I can’t lie here. I throw the covers off of me and sigh heavily for the hundredth time in the past hour. I run my hands over my face then get up and pace around the room. I wish I had something to do besides replay every detail of what happened while on Earth. I stop when I see my doorknob start to turn. I quickly run back to my bed and cover up—acting like I’m asleep.

I concentrate on keeping my breathing slow and steady as I hear footsteps coming closer to me. I feel the covers peel back slowly from my shoulders, and my heartbeat speeds up. I clench my fist tight and hold my breath.

“Orion?” I hear Plath’s voice, and it sends unnerving chills down my spine.

I ignore him.

“Orion, please. I don’t have much time, and I need to talk to you.”

“You betrayed me,” is the first thing I say without opening my eyes or turning over to face him. I feel tears burning my eyelids. I try to force them to stay back, but they don’t. I hate what he does to me. I hate that a part of me still wants to care for him.

“Would you let me explain?” His voice sounds caring, and it makes me hate him even more.

“What’s done is done.” I pull my sheets up to wipe my tears. I need to toughen up. I can’t turn to mush now. Not here. Not in front of him. I can’t allow him to see this part of me ever again. He doesn’t deserve to see me broken. He doesn’t deserve to see me at all.

“I’m here to bring you to meet with the Constable. But before I do, I want you to know that I would rather you be dead than in here. I would have done you a favor to have killed you myself.”

I sit up then bend over to reach for my shoes on the floor. I want to scream at him. I want to kill him, but instead, I start putting on my shoes. “Did you know they killed my father?” I ask calmly.

He looks me directly in the eyes, and I wonder how he can after all he has done. “I didn’t know how to tell you,” he mumbles quietly.

I scoff at his response. “You didn’t know how to tell me?” I stand up and push him hard in the chest. “Who the hell do you think you are?”

“Orion, calm down!”

I clench my jaw tight and slap him across his face. He turns his head and holds his cheek for a second. When he looks at me again, I ball the front of his shirt into my fist and get inches from his face. “You have no right to tell me to calm down! Damn, I wish I had a gun.” I shove him away from me as I release his shirt.

To my surprise, he reaches in his pocket and takes out a pistol. He clicks the safety off and takes my hand—placing the gun in it. He steps back and closes his eyes. I raise the gun with shaky hands and point it at his head. I start to pull the trigger. This is what I want. Isn’t it? The one who hurt me the most, dead? But… Then there’s just that. The “but”. I slowly move my finger away from the trigger and turn the safety back on. I take a deep breath and wipe tears from my eyes. I place the gun down on my bed and look at Plath.

He opens his eyes and looks at the gun on the bed. His eyes drift back to me. “I don’t know what to say to you to make you understand my side of this.”

I kneel down and tie my shoes with shaky hands. I try to focus on breathing. The gun is tempting me. Not to kill Plath but to kill myself. It’d be so easy. Just a pull of the trigger, and it’s all over. I look at Plath as I stand back up. “I don’t know how to process all of this! Just take me wherever you need to take me.” I start to walk towards the door, but he stops me by grabbing my arm.

He picks up the gun and places it in my hand. “Keep this. Don’t get caught with it.” He hands me a black Velcro strap from his pocket. “Pull up your pant leg.” I do as he says and pull my right pant leg up to my knee.

He laughs a little. “Higher.”

He then pulls the pant leg all the way up, exposing my thigh. He takes the gun and strap from my hand and wraps the black Velcro strap securely around my upper thigh. He checks the safety then places the gun securely in the strap. He pulls my pant leg back down and looks to make sure it’s hidden. “Always keep that with you.”

I nod. “Okay.”

“I need to take you to them. We’re late, and they’ll notice soon.” He looks at his watch then opens the door for me. “Follow me, and remember you don’t have a clue who I am.”

“I don’t have to pretend. I really don’t know who you are,” I say quietly but loud enough for him to hear.