twenty-eight

When Julia parked her Outback at the stable on Sunday afternoon, Max was strapped in his booster seat, rubbing his eyes and irritable because of yet another nightmare. She had done her best to dispel his fear, but she couldn’t make it go away if he wouldn’t even acknowledge it. Hunter praising him for being a big boy didn’t help. The dreams about the snake occurred nightly now, so she had arranged today’s visit with Chet. If Max saw Jed was safe, maybe he could put the snake out of his mind.

Her mom and George had extended their trip and were still gone. With Tiff’s wedding just six days away, Julia would need to take Max to the children’s program or leave him with a hotel baby-sitter tomorrow. Neither option would be easy if Max was afraid to leave the house. This morning she had tried a “kill the snake” game and brought in Zeke’s Ninja Turtles for backup, but Max wasn’t impressed with her skills.

As she climbed out of her car, he kicked his legs. “Mommy, no! I don’t want to get out.”

With her heart breaking, she peered at his tearstained face. She’d spent an hour coaching him about this visit. “But Max, we decided—”

He kicked even harder. “I don’t want to see the horse!”

Chet walked up to the car and laid a friendly hand on her shoulder. “How about if I give it a try?”

“Thanks,” she murmured. “I’m desperate.”

Leaning forward, Chet pushed back his hat and put his hands on his knees. “Hey, partner. How would you like to visit Sugar Pie?”

Taken by surprise, Max stopped squirming. Julia popped the harness, swung him up to her hip, and smiled her thanks to Chet.

“That sounds like fun, doesn’t it?” she said in her mommy voice.

Max’s arms tensed around her neck, but he didn’t squirm. His eyes were riveted to Chet’s face. “You came to get us at those rocks.”

“Yes, I did. That was pretty scary, huh?”

The color drained out of Max’s face, but he didn’t utter a sound or tighten his grip on her neck. Hopeful, Julia lowered him to his feet. He slid easily but held tight to her hand, his eyes as wide as saucers as they approached the barn.

They were ten steps away when she spotted Zeke. Dressed in Levi’s, an olive green T-shirt, and hiking boots, he stepped out of the barn. Julia’s heartbeat tripled, and for a moment she enjoyed the sight of sunlight streaking his hair, the smile on his lean face, and the apparent strength of his broad shoulders. This was the man she wanted Max to copy and admire. Zeke carried himself with authority, not arrogance. He was in charge and it showed, but he wasn’t controlling or critical. And those biceps clearly visible beneath the snug T-shirt . . . her mouth went as dry as it had when he kissed her in the dark.

Tingling in spite of the heat, she told herself to get a grip. She could enjoy Zeke’s company later. Today was about Max. If anyone could help her son get over his fear of snakes, it was Zeke.

Julia waved a greeting and smiled. “This is a surprise.”

“For me too,” Zeke replied. “A good one.”

Chet’s gaze bounced from Zeke’s face to hers, and then back to Zeke. “I was just taking Miss Julia and Max to visit the horses. If you can handle it, I’d be obliged. We’re shorthanded today.”

“Sure, Chet. No problem.”

The cowboy left, and Zeke faced Julia. “I just checked Golden Point. The prep work is done, and the contractor got the part for the paver. With a little luck, the work will be done by Wednesday, and the landscapers can bring in the potted trees. It’s not done yet, but I think we’re going to make it.”

“I hope so.” But she was still ready with a backup plan, especially since a tropical storm was forming off the coast of Baja and traveling north.

Max tugged hard on her arm. She looked down and saw his gaze riveted on Zeke. “You gave me the Ninja Turtles.”

“That’s right,” Zeke replied.

“You’re wearing a green shirt. The Turtles are green too.”

Hands on his hips, Zeke spread his feet a little wider. “That’s me”—he deepened his voice—“Turtle Man.”

Max giggled. “You’re not really a Ninja Turtle.”

“No.” Grinning, Zeke lowered his arms. “But I wanted to be one when I was a kid. Who’s your favorite?”

“Michelangelo.” Max tilted his face up at Julia. “That’s the one you used to try to kill the snake. But it didn’t work.”

When Zeke lifted an eyebrow at her, she mouthed, Later. “We came to see how Jed’s doing.”

Max kept his eyes on Zeke. “The snake bit him. I saw it. Snakes can be anywhere, even in your yard.”

Understanding washed away the playfulness on Zeke’s face. Dropping to a crouch, he put himself eye-to-eye with Max. “I hate snakes.”

Max let go of Julia’s hand and inched closer to Zeke. “I do too.”

“If you ask me,” Zeke said just to Max, “rattlesnakes make the scariest sound in the world.”

A weight lifted from Julia’s shoulders. This was the kind of understanding Max needed, not the shame dished out by Hunter.

The three of them walked into the big barn with Max in the middle. When Zeke laid a hand on his shoulder, Max looked up and grinned, his first true smile in almost a week. Julia’s breath caught, and in a flash of hope she imagined the three of them together in ten years, then twenty.

One step at a time. Giving herself a mental shake, she focused back on Max.

A carved wooden sign marked Jed’s stall. As they approached, Zeke picked up Max and balanced him on his hip. When they reached the stall, he pointed over the half door to Jed munching hay. Julia stood on Zeke’s other side, their shoulders brushing while he gave Max an update on Jed.

“The vet checked his leg this morning. He’s going to be as good as new in about two weeks.”

“Is the snake gone?” Max asked.

“That’s a good question.” Zeke glanced at Julia, giving her a chance to intervene. But there was no need. She trusted Zeke’s judgment, so she nodded. Tell him what you think is best.

Zeke shifted Max further back on his hip, then looked into the boy’s tense face. “That particular snake is dead. I’ve never seen one around the stable or near your house or the big hotel, but I’ll be straight with you, Max. Snakes are part of nature. It’s smart to stay away from the places they hang out, like those boulders.”

Max turned to Julia, his arm still around Zeke’s neck but relaxed now. “I’m never going near those rocks again.”

“That’s a good idea,” Zeke told him. “But you know what?”

“What?”

“You don’t need to be afraid. You just need to be smart, which you are. If you ever hear that sound again, walk away from it.”

“I will,” Max vowed. “I hate snakes.”

When they walked back outside, Max squirmed to get down. The instant his feet touched the ground, he stomped on an invisible snake. Zeke stomped with him, and so did Julia. The stomping turned into a silly game with Max deciding he wanted to be the Ninja Turtle named Raphael because he was extra tough.

Laughing and joking, the three of them decided to go back and give Jed some carrots. The big horse gobbled them up, but when they fed some to Sugar Pie, she ate like the dainty old lady she was.

With Max distracted, Zeke nudged Julia a few steps away and whispered into her ear. “That snake episode really shook him up.”

“More than you know.” She told him about the nightmares. “Thanks for helping him. It’s been tough on us both, and Hunter didn’t help at all. He told Max to be a man like Daddy. Can you believe it?”

“Unfortunately, I can.” Something dark dimmed his expression. For a moment he studied her. “Are you doing anything right now?”

“No. Why?”

“How about coming to the house? When I cleaned out the rest of the boxes, I found some more Ninja Turtle stuff. I want Max to have it. Plus it’ll give us a chance to talk in private. I promised to tell you about the other night.”

“I’d like that a lot.”

When Julia told Max they were going to Zeke’s house, he ran out of the barn, snakes and horses forgotten. Zeke lifted Max into the car seat, and they drove separately with Zeke in the lead. When they arrived at his house, he opened the big garage door. The wall of boxes was gone, but she saw one remaining carton on the workbench. The Ninja Turtle sidekicks named Splinter, the Shredder, and April O’Neil were lined up next to it.

Zeke led them to the bench and handed the action figures to Max. “You’ll need these to go with the Turtles.”

“Thanks!” Max clutched the figures in both hands, making a jumble of plastic arms and legs. “Want to play Turtles with me?”

“Maybe later,” Zeke said. “But you can play with them on the grass while I talk to your mom.”

Max looked at Zeke as if he really were Turtle Man, then scampered to the landscaped mound in the middle of the lawn.

When he was settled, Julia shifted her gaze to Zeke. “So here we are.”

Zeke glanced at the flattened boxes stacked against the wall, ready in case he lost his job and needed to move. Last week when he told Julia something was happening to him, he had expected to be in a different place mentally and professionally. A place of triumph, his career secure and his faith restored after defeating Maury and Hunter. Instead, his first step back to God had led him to his own Gethsemane. A lonely place of decision, where a man chose to fight for himself or die for the sake of others.

The more Zeke thought about everything Maury could do for Caliente Springs, the more he wondered if his return to faith would cost him his career. Without a job, he couldn’t bring himself to even think about asking Julia to marry him. Some men might not care about supporting a wife and child, but Zeke did.

Julia pushed up on her toes and looked into the open box on the workbench, specifically at the upper half of a framed photograph of Zeke and his dad.

“Can I see it?” she asked.

Without comment, he handed it to her. He had tried to go through his dad’s things that morning, but the picture of that grinning kid had sucker-punched him. He’d come within an inch of taping the box shut again.

“What else is in here?” Julia lifted out a thick manila envelope. “I’d love to see more pictures.”

He plucked the envelope from her fingers. Family photographs were his mother’s domain, and he’d already divvied up the loose prints and albums with his sisters. He had no idea what expression was on his face, but Julia backed away from him. “I’m sorry, Zeke. I didn’t mean to pry.”

“You didn’t.” If he could share facing his father’s disappointment with anyone, it was Julia. “This stuff belonged to my dad.”

She looked at the box, trailed a finger down the smooth side, then traced the crisp No. 1 written on it. “I know what it’s like to go through old things like this. Would it help if we did it together? You never know. We might find something special.”

Zeke doubted it. The envelope in his hand held his father’s sermon notes, and it weighed a thousand pounds. Expecting nothing but his father’s disappointment, he worked the clasp open and slid out a stack of paper. When he saw the double-spaced type with notes written in red ink, his father’s voice played in his head. Don’t let God down, son. Your behavior is your witness.

Zeke held back a scowl, but his throat knotted over a tender lump. If his dad had walked into the garage at that moment, Zeke would have hugged him hard and resented him all at the same time. The envelope slipped from his hand back to the workbench. Letting out a slow breath, he raked his hand through his hair.

“What’s wrong?” Julia asked.

“I spent my whole life trying to live up to what’s in these notes.” Years of trying to be perfect, hiding his failures, and wearing a coat-hanger smile. “I couldn’t do it.”

Take the resentment, Lord. I don’t want it.

Julia studied his face for a moment, sighed with him, and reached back inside the box. “Let’s see what else is here.”

Zeke touched her shoulder. Not to stop her but to draw strength from having her at his side. He had bared his soul to her, yet she was here with him now. Encouraging him, helping him, her eyes so full of love he didn’t know whether to stand taller or break down. “Thanks for being here.”

Reaching up, she laid her hand over his. “I wouldn’t be anywhere else right now. Let’s finish this.”

Spine straight, he reached in the box and lifted out the ceramic candy dish his youngest sister made in second grade. It was lumpy, crooked, and glazed a hideous orange. Grinning, Zeke held it up for Julia’s inspection. “What do you think?”

“I think it’s beautiful.” She admired it a moment, then tipped her head. “Did you make it?”

“No, my baby sister did. My dad kept it on his desk for years.”

Julia grinned. “The baby of the family and daddy’s little girl. I bet she got away with murder.”

“Definitely.”

But Zeke never did. He’d been in training to be the family standard-bearer. For the most part, he had enjoyed the attention. And though the pressure to be perfect had left marks, it had also given him his achievements. With more gratitude than resentment, he set the candy dish aside and looked back in the box.

Pushing to her toes, Julia peered over the edge. “A cigar box. And it’s made of wood.”

“What about it?”

“Cigar boxes are always special. I don’t know why, but they are.”

Julia didn’t know it, but she was looking at his father’s junk box—a collection of pencil stubs, dried-out pens, rubber bands, and whatever other flotsam gathered on his desk. Zeke put on the most somber expression he could manage. When he spoke, his voice came out in the dark tone of a mortician. “Would you open it for me?”

“Of course.”

Equally somber, Julia paused to trade a respectful look then opened the lid. Instead of looking into the box, Zeke watched her brows arch and collapse as she burst out laughing. The box held just what he expected along with toenail clippers and wart remover.

Julia shook her head. “There goes my ‘special cigar box’ theory. Wart remover? Really?”

Zeke picked up the half-used bottle and smiled. Apparently the Reverend Jacob Monroe was as human as anyone else. If he had checked the box before storing it, he would have tossed the wart remover, but he’d missed it. Made a mistake. Forgotten to double-check the way he had always told Zeke to do.

It’s okay, Dad. I get it. No one’s perfect. Not you. Not me. With his eyes suddenly damp, Zeke found it easy to love his dad—warts and all.

Feeling lighter than he had in years, he reached back into the storage box. His fingers hit a rock about five inches in diameter, coarse to the touch, and surprisingly light in weight. He knew the feel of it, the shape in his hand. As he lifted it out, he turned his palm to display the round stone to Julia. “I can’t believe this. It’s an uncracked geode.”

“From your dad.”

“Yes. I wonder where it came from.” He thought a minute and decided his father had purchased it somewhere, maybe as a birthday gift for his son. “Let’s open it.” He called over his shoulder. “Hey, Max, I found one of those special rocks. We’re going to crack it open. Do you want to help?”

“Yeah!” Max scrambled into the garage, the Ninja Turtles toys abandoned in the shade of a juniper bush.

Zeke cut the corner out of a spare cardboard box to use as a wedge to hold the geode. Then he fetched a hammer, chisel, and two pairs of protective glasses out of a plastic toolbox. They needed three, so he fetched his sunglasses out of the SUV and put them on. He gave the clear plastic pairs to Max and Julia, and they all crouched in the middle of the garage.

Max wrinkled his nose. “We look funny.”

“We also look smart,” Zeke replied. “The glasses will keep any rock pieces from hitting us in the eye.” He’d been down that road once. Never again.

After smiling her appreciation to Zeke, Julia patted Max on the back. “That’s a good safety lesson.”

Zeke set the geode in the wedge, positioned the chisel, and tapped it with the hammer. He made three cuts, then turned to Max. “Would you like to give it a try?”

When Max’s eyes lit up, Zeke motioned for the boy to scoot in front of him. Knowing the hammer was heavy, Zeke put his hand over Max’s smaller ones, and together they made another cut.

When they finished, Zeke offered the tools to Julia. “Your turn.”

She gripped the hammer and positioned the chisel but checked with him before making a cut. “Is this right?”

“Close enough.” Perfection no longer mattered to him.

She gripped the hammer, shifted her fingers again, but still hesitated. “I don’t want to ruin it.”

“Here. I’ll help.” He put his hand over hers, and together they tapped the stone twice. At the third tap, the ugly rock split in two to reveal the purest, most stunning purple geode Zeke had ever seen.

Julia caught her breath. “It’s beautiful.”

“It’s amethyst.” The semi-precious stone was one of his favorites, in part because it made appearances in the Bible. In Hebrew, the word for amethyst was ahlamah, and it meant dream stone. The tie-in to Dare to Dream wasn’t lost on him. In Greek, amethyst meant “not drunken,” and that seemed fitting too. Zeke had been drunk on his own accomplishments, and he was done with that now.

He picked up the two halves of the stone, handed one to Max and the other to Julia. “These are for you.”

Max said, “Wow!” and took the rock in both hands, but Julia refused to accept hers.

“I can’t. It’s too special.”

“Take it.” He pushed it into her palms.

“But—”

“Take it,” he said again. “We’ll find a special place to put it.”

We. She must have heard, because her cheeks turned the color of rose quartz.

He didn’t know what to say with Max present, so he kept it simple. “I’m not where I want to be, but I’m not where I was either. God’s working on me.”

Julia studied him for a moment. “It’s part of being human, isn’t it?”

“What is?”

“Being clay in God’s hands. Seeing our weaknesses, trusting Him to change us.” She ran her finger over the shell of the cut geode. “Some changes take a long time, but others are instant. One minute you’re standing on your own two feet, and the next you’re on your face in the dirt. Getting up takes a lot more time than falling down.”

No wonder he loved this woman. She understood him in ways no one else did, and he understood her too. Their journeys had started in very different places, but now they were on the same path. For today, that was enough.

They shared a companionable silence until Max announced he was hungry.

“Me too,” Zeke said. “Let’s get pizza.”

“Yeah!” Max leapt to his feet. “Let’s pretend we’re Ninja Turtles. Mommy can be April O’Neil and you can be Leonardo.”

Zeke reached for Max and tickled him. “How about you? Who are going to be?”

“I’ll be . . .” Max couldn’t stop laughing.

“How about Donatello?” Zeke suggested. “He’s good at science.”

“Cool!”

While Julia gazed sweetly at her son, Zeke studied the soft line of her mouth, the tender dip of her chin, and he thought of a rock of another kind—the diamond he wanted to slide on her finger. His career was hanging by a thread, but his faith was coming back strong. If God moved the way Zeke hoped, he’d be shopping for that ring very soon.