27

‘I think this might be the last time,’ Darren said as he settled into his seat.

‘We’d better make it a good one then,’ Tony replied with a grin.

Darren grinned back and opened his notebook at the next blank page. ‘We’ve spoken about the history of activism by Aboriginal people in Australia that provided the intellectual ground for the Tent Embassy, but what were the international influences?’

‘At the Embassy we used the language of rights. We didn’t make them up. They came from international law, from the documents produced by the United Nations. The concept of human rights was the intellectual driving forces of the Magna Carta and the American and French revolutions. Thomas Paine, Benjamin Franklin and Thomas Jefferson were talking about universal human rights long before we were.’

Tony continued, explaining how claims to human rights were more than just the chattering of the elite. They concerned important aspects of the day-to-day lives of people who were disempowered - the right to equality, the right to a fair wage, the right to make decisions. He dismissed the idea that you have either a rights agenda or practical outcomes.

‘Take the right to be free from racial discrimination. It is a universal human right, protected by several of the key international human rights instruments and there is even one especially dedicated to preventing it – the Convention to Eliminate all forms of Racial Discrimination. We have adopted that convention into Australian law through the federal Racial Discrimination Act and it provides us with a mechanism to make a complaint about racial discrimination to the Human Rights Commission. So there is a tangible remedy for it now. People can actually make a complaint if they feel that they have been unfairly treated.’

Darren nodded as he wrote and Tony paused to allow him to catch up. He looked at the familiar furrow in Darren’s forehead, the one that made him appear intense but thoughtful. His black shiny hair was pulled back into a ponytail but his slight sideburns formed small curls. When Darren seemed to have caught up, Tony continued.

‘Anti-discrimination laws have led to profound changes. Even though there may be few landmark cases and the discrimination is only prohibited in certain circumstances, look at the impact of those laws. Pretty much every workplace now has policies in place that prevent racial discrimination in employment. They have policies to prohibit sexual harassment in the workplace. Companies run training and information sessions for employees about what discrimination is and to emphasise that it needs to be avoided. If you compared the way the workforce was before these laws with how it operates now, you would begin to understand the important impact that legislating a right can have on the community.’

When Tony paused, Darren took the opportunity to ask a question. ‘You were saying last time that land rights were never considered to be a panacea. How did you think they would assist in delivering social justice?’

‘You have to remember that getting land rights doesn’t mean the government is no longer responsible for ensuring that our communities have adequate housing, health and education facilities. Other Australians have assets and that doesn’t mean that the government is no longer responsible for providing them with the necessities. The statistics show that federal and state governments continue to underfund on all of these areas for Aboriginal people, even though we have the lowest levels of income and education, the poorest levels of health and the worst standards of housing. Having land rights will only do so much when you don’t have education, health and housing.’

Tony went on to explain that even if the government provided these basic necessities at appropriate levels, it didn’t mean that the claim for land compensation and land rights was no longer legitimate.

When Tony finally paused, Darren closed his book. ‘Thank you so much. I can’t thank you enough for all your help. It’s been an honour just to listen to you speak. I’ll send the transcripts of all our discussions through to you when I have typed these up, just to make sure you are happy with everything.’

‘Well, the pleasure has been mine. I’ve certainly relived some old memories doing these interviews.’ Tony stood and stretched his arms and legs. ‘I’ll walk you out.’

‘It’s okay. I know the way.’

‘I have to go down to the front anyway.’

Darren gave a tight smile. He had been planning to stop by at Rachel Miles’s office before he left. Her door had been closed when he had arrived. He was just as disappointed when he saw on his way out that her door was open but she was not there.

Tony paused as they passed and looked into the empty office. ‘Well, thanks again and I’ll see you when you drop the transcripts off.’ They continued walking to the reception. ‘Best of luck and remember what I said about going back to law school. If I can help you with anything, let me know.’ He shook Darren’s hand with a warm, firm grip.

Darren was wondering what to do about Rachel -whether or not he might leave a message - when he heard Tony ask Carol where she was.

‘She left about half an hour ago.’

‘Did she say where she was going?’

‘To a meeting.’

‘Well, did she say when she was getting back?’

‘No. My job is to answer the phones. Not to keep tabs on our legal staff.’

‘You are supposed to know where everyone is.’

‘She said that she was going to a meeting. See,’ Carol waved her hand. ‘It is here on the board. “Meeting”.’

Tony stormed back to his office. He didn’t like not knowing where Rachel was. He always knew where Beth Ann would be. She was always contactable, except when she was working in the prison. But even then he knew exactly where she was.

He was particularly on edge since Simone had decided to visit her grandmother. He had steadfastly refused to take her back to the old mission, even when she was little, had always insisted that his mother travel to Sydney to see them. He should have known he could not stop his daughter from going there now she was an adult. The wonder was that she had never wanted to go there sooner. In the past, her friends, studies and boyfriends kept her happy in Sydney. Now, it was out of his hands.

A deep dread had lurked within him ever since, with defiant eyes, she announced she was going. He was in no position to challenge her, to command her to stay. And he could only hope that she would be shielded from the truth that he had tried to keep from her, that he himself had tried to forget. ‘I don’t want you talking to her about Emily,’ he had told his mother sternly.

‘I’m not going to lie to her if she asks,’ his mother had replied frankly.

‘She won’t ask if you don’t bring it up, will she?’

In the end he had extracted a promise of silence from her. But still, he had been restless, short-tempered, especially with Rachel, whose unexplained absence was really ticking him off. It was all getting too complicated. Sure, he loved the passion of it, was besotted with her, but now that he had let it get so out of hand there were times when it made him miserable.

He stared at the computer screen, unable to concentrate. He’d always wanted people to admire him and he had a knack for getting others to follow his lead. He could read people and knew how to tailor his remarks and his persona to his audience. It was one of Tony Harlowe’s Survival Rules: ‘Play on people’s need to believe’. This he had done, creating a kind of cult following - Tony Harlowe, Aboriginal activist and intellectual.

He’d done it with Rachel. She was young and looked up to him, was captivated when he spoke to her, could argue in detail with him about the more complex cases they were working on. She would listen carefully, attentively, as he went through speeches he was about to give. He had, perhaps unwittingly, but easily, slipped into a relationship with her that was beyond sexual. And the fact that he had been imagining leaving Beth Ann for her was testament to the depth of his feelings for her.

But the thought of the possible fallout of his actions made him sick. Beth Ann was so loyal, so kind-hearted, so trusting. He had known that the day he met her. Fragile and slight but her face so warm, not just beautiful but tender. He had loved her so desperately and the two times she had refused to marry him had only made him desire her more. He had known then that she was a light for him, that despite her slight frame, despite her timidity, she was solid. He could rely on her. She could help him forget the past and make the future that he had always wanted for himself. And she had done just that. Unquestioningly. Uncomplainingly.

Speaking with Darren had reminded him of everything that had been achieved since the Tent Embassy. And he had been able to be a part of that, to be a voice, a force. He mattered. His opinion was sought. His presence requested.

And Beth Ann had been there all the time. She had run his house, made sure his daughter was raised properly - his perfect, beautiful daughter. She never tried to take the credit for the things he had achieved which would have been harder, maybe impossible, if she had not been there behind the scenes, supporting him. The attraction of a partnership with an attractive, dynamic young Aboriginal lawyer who could also be an intellectual companion was a tempting fantasy. But Beth Ann had been there for him for all those decades and he owed her. Not just owed her but, despite Rachel, despite his lust, he did love her. She was - he had to admit it - still his light.

He felt the deepest wash of guilt for this situation he had gotten himself into, and for his deceitfulness. He had always tried to be honest with Beth Ann. Yes, he had been unfaithful and that brought with it a network of lies but he never had to wear the mask with her, never had to pretend with her that he was someone he wasn’t. He never had to play on her need to believe. He never had to be Tony Harlowe, community leader. With Beth Ann, he revealed more of himself than to anyone else. And she had accepted him, had believed in him. Even seeing him without the mask, she had chosen to love him.

At that moment, he just wanted to be with her, at home, in the sanctuary Beth Ann kept for him. To kiss her on her forehead. To feel her body fold into his. That was where he wanted to be. He would tell Rachel as soon as he could that it had all been a big mistake. She would always have a place in his heart but he could no longer keep deceiving his wife.