CHAPTER 5

Maverick

 

I made sure the girls were asleep and a load of laundry was started before I poured myself a tall glass of bourbon. I took a swallow and stared at the dirty dishes in my sink, not giving a shit they were going to sit there until the morning. There wasn’t much I cared about at all right then.

My phone had been going off all night, and an hour ago, I shut it off, not wanting to talk to a soul. Word traveled fast around town, and I knew the people calling wanted to either gossip about Cricket being back or see if I was doing okay with her surprising return. Neither was something I wanted to discuss with my family, let alone anyone else, so I grabbed the bottle and walked to my front porch. I needed to drown my thoughts or at least steer them away from her.

God… what in the hell was she doing back? Working at the Pig like she never left? Walking around as if she belonged? She’d been gone for years, she left her parents alone for over a decade now, and suddenly, she just returns like the prodigal child and I’m supposed to be okay with that? Forget me, forget how she tore me to shreds… what about everyone else? My brothers, Molly, everyone who looked forward to walking into that diner to see her smiling face every fucking day… she just abandoned them all for what? Fame? Money? And never once throughout the years did she so much as send a fucking Christmas card.

Fuck that. Fuck her, and fuck it all.

My ass had just hit the top step when I heard a truck rolling up the drive. So much for getting a minute alone.

When both of my brothers got out of Hunter’s truck, it wasn’t surprising. They knew I had my girls and what time they went to bed, so I expected them to show up when they did.

Hunter didn’t beat around the bush and spoke up as soon as he reached me. “Summer told me.” Of course, she did. His wife worked at the Pig, where apparently Cricket was working again. “She found out when she walked in to work tonight and called me on her break. Said Cricket was cryin’ in the back room when she got there… which incidentally was around the same time you got back from lunch in a pissy-ass mood.”

It used to make my blood itch when I heard that Cricket was upset, and I hated to admit I still felt a little of it, but I refused to go there, not when I was so fucked up over her being back. “I don’t wanna talk about it.” I tossed another healthy swallow down my throat and poured three more finger’s worth, pretending not to care that Cricket was crying earlier. I shouldn’t have cared. She didn’t give a shit about me and how many goddamned times I shed tears like a little love-sick bitch-ass fool when she left me.

“You can’t—”

I pointed at him. “I can do whatever the fuck I want. And right now, I do not want to talk about that fuckin’ woman. You hear me? I never wanna talk about her.”

“You can’t avoid it forever, Mav. Summer said she’s taking over for Ed and Lorna, so she’s gonna be around… probably for good.”

“There are other places besides the Pickled Pig to eat at.”

Wilder choked and hit his chest. “But you can’t live without Ms. Lorna’s pie,” he proclaimed in a hundred percent seriousness. He had a thing for desserts, which was convenient, seeing as he was married to a baker. Frankie made cakes that looked like paintings and sculptures. It was surreal how talented she was.

I gave a jerk of my head even though I’d miss the delicious food from the Pig. “I’ll survive.”

“Did you talk to her?” Hunter asked cautiously, not ready to give up on Cricket’s return.

“What part of I don’t want to talk about it don’t you understand?”

His words were halted when I heard a vehicle rumbling down the drive. As a pair of headlights got brighter, I squinted against their beams. “Damn…” Wild murmured when the lights shut off, and he saw who was driving Ed’s old truck. “I’ll get rid of her for you,” he offered. If I was going to have any one of my family members run interference with Cricket, it would have been Wilder. He was the calmest out of everyone and wouldn’t lose his shit on her.

I actually contemplated sending Hunter over because he wouldn’t hold back, and for a moment, I wanted someone to go off on her. But if that happened, then I’d have to kick my brother’s ass for making my Pixie cry, and I didn’t want to have to do that.

Jesus… I was fucked up in the head.

It was then that I got with the program and caught a glimpse of Cricket behind the wheel, and I saw her shoulders shaking. The part of me that vowed to always protect her won out, and I knew I needed to deal with her. I just didn’t know what the hell she wanted after all these years.

“Just go, y’all. I got it.”

“You sure?” Hunter double-checked. “I have no problem tellin’ her to get lost.”

Even that made the defensive instincts I always felt about Cricket rise. “Go.” I insisted. “Like you said, I can’t avoid it forever, might as well get this shit over with.”

They lifted their chins before going back to Hunter’s truck, each man staring her down, sharing clearly that she wasn’t welcome with just a look. I saw her silhouette sitting there, her fingers wrapped around the wheel, body now stiff as a board. We stared at each other through the dim light of my porch, several feet between us, but the memories were enough to close the distance and make me feel as if it was just yesterday that I was looking into those fields of green as I moved inside her. As I held her, laughed with her, made promises, planned a future… I lived to see her smiling back at me, and with how vivid the memories of her were, I actually had a moment when I thought her being gone was a nightmare.

But it wasn’t. And she wasn’t a figment of my imagination. She was here. Finally.

It wasn’t until my brothers drove away and were gone for several minutes that Cricket finally got the nerve to open the door. The hinges squeaked, and my neck lost elasticity and dropped forward. My self-preservation didn’t allow me to watch as she came closer, her ample hips swaying and her toned legs eating up the distance between us. I heard her feet on the ground, slowly making their way toward me, each step getting louder and louder in time with the pounding of my heart.

Her raspy throat cleared, and I lifted my head and fought with every fiber of my being not to react to her proximity. Her hair was in two little pigtails on either side of her neck, her fingers wringing in front of her, and she was shifting in her boots. Her tan legs in a pair of cutoffs were a temptation I was never able to resist.

“Hi.” She finally spoke, but that didn’t mean I had to. I raised a brow, waiting to hear what she had to say but also speechless at the same time. “I know I owe you so much… an apology, an explanation… just, I know that. And maybe one day when you can look at me without so much hatred…” Her words stuttered, and she sucked in a breath, unable to finish.

I dug my toes into my boots to prevent myself from going to her. I loved a lot about Cricket, but there was always one thing I couldn’t stand. And that was when she cried. I hated it. So much that it made me angry beyond reason, so when she was sad, I took it as a personal failure. I didn’t like it when her happiness was out of my control, and I didn’t know how to deal with her tears without acting like a complete tool, so she eventually learned how to control her emotions around me, which, good or bad, was just how it was.

And that was what she was doing—rolling her lips and dropping her head so she could cross her eyes to fight back the tears. Why she did that was beyond me, but she said it took the focus off what she was thinking about. So whenever she was upset about something, to prevent her from crying, I’d call her name, then cross my eyes. She’d smirk and sink her teeth into her bottom lip, then she’d forget about what was bothering her.

But then she lifted her head and either didn’t try or wasn’t able to hold back her tears because they slowly slid down her cheeks. And in the past, even if I made her laugh, I always pulled her into my arms if she was upset. So it was instinctual that I started to push up to comfort her, but then I stopped myself. That wasn’t my job anymore, even if I wanted it to be.

I couldn’t help the pitiful grunt that vibrated in my throat when I held back from going to her.

She heard it because she’d sucked in an audible breath but then forged on and forced herself to get out what she came to say. “I just wanted you to know that I won’t be working at the Pig Thursdays or Fridays, so you can come those days without fear of seeing me. I promise I’ll stay away. My parents would be very upset if they never saw you again, and well, I just wanted you to know that.”

She started to back away, and fuck me, I opened my mouth. “Why are you here, Cricket?”

“To tell you that.”

“Bullshit. Anyone coulda told me that.”

Cricket was an amazing cook, she had a beautiful voice, and was classically trained on the piano. She was all-around talented. But she was a terrible liar. The woman didn’t have a vindictive bone in her body, and I never admitted I knew what her tell was when she was trying to fib. She read me like an open book, so no way was I was giving up the knowledge that she couldn’t lie to save her life.

Her fingers moved against her thigh like she was playing the piano when she lied again. “I thought you should hear it from me so you knew I made the decision. I didn’t want you to think… well, that because I was back that you weren’t welcome there. Not that my parents would ever make you feel unwelcome, just that you deserve to still live your life and do everything you would… God.” She shook her head and laughed humorlessly. “Forget it. I can’t think straight, let alone get a sentence out that makes a lick of sense. Just know that I won’t be at the Pig on Thursdays and Fridays.”

And then she did something that had my dick hardening, something that was another one of her tells. But this one wasn’t because she was lying. It was because she was turned on. Because she wanted my cock. My mouth on her cunt. My fingers inside her tight, wet pussy. She ran the tip of her finger down the shell of her ear and then toyed with the lobe.

I lost control and set my glass down and rushed her with a feral growl. Her hand fell, and she stumbled back. She winced as her ass slammed into the truck, but not out of pain. No… this was something else. Her eyes squeezed shut, and her hands covered her face as if she was protecting herself, causing me to stop dead in my tracks. The tingling in my balls slid up to the back of my neck in an alarmingly brutal way.

It was as if my world had been tilted and rolling around off-kilter for years, but suddenly, it was back on its axis and was spinning around me so fast I had no choice but to see clearly. And I saw her. Damn, did I see her. And I did not like what was in front of my eyes. “Who hurt you?”

Her lids fluttered open, and when she glanced around, realizing where she was and the state she was in, she tried to recover, but it was too late. I already knew. “Mav—”

“Is that why you really came back?” I took a step closer. “You runnin’ from someone who hurt you?” Another step. “Was it that piece of shit who put a ring on your finger? Huh?” I closed the distance and lifted her left hand, my thumb rubbing over her bare ring finger. “He put his hands on you?”

Her chin was trembling, and her eyes were glossy, but she still tried to deny it, shaking her head.

I raised my right hand and gently wrapped my fingers around her throat, something I always used to do. I loved feeling her pulse, her heart beat beneath my palm, and when I did, she sucked in a painful breath. I pressed gently, and she winced again, and my guts twisted somethin’ awful.

“Cricket, I swear to God—”

“It’s nothing. I’m fine.”

My knees locked. “You’re not fine.”

“Dad?”

Cricket’s eyes flew over my shoulder, and I spun around to see Aubrey standing on the porch with a blanket wrapped around her slender body. She was shivering, and her face was splotchy. “What’s wrong?” I asked harsher than intended as I stormed over to her. “You all right?”

She shook her head and sniffled. “I want my mom.”

“Why?” I grabbed her shoulders and bent at the knees to be eye level with her, but she turned her face away from me. “Are you hurt? Sick? Did you have a bad dream?”

“I need to call my mom.”

“It’s late, sweetie. She’ll be sleeping. Tell me what’s wrong so I can help you.”

Her eyes closed, and tears rolled down her cheeks, and she shook her head, refusing to even look at me. “I don’t want you. I just want my mom!” She screamed at me and then tore out of my arms and ran back into the house. I went to follow, but a warm hand grabbed my wrist.

I whipped my head around, somehow overlooking the fact that Cricket was still here. “Has she gotten her period yet?”

“Fuck,” I hissed. “No. At least I don’t think so.” When her head pulled back in surprise, I didn’t know why I felt the need to explain, but I did it anyway. “I didn’t even know she existed until a couple of years ago, so I still have a lot to learn about her.”

Cricket’s face didn’t show much of an expression at all. “I see. Well, I’ll leave you to deal with that.”

“Can you… can you just go check on her before I call Piper and wake her up?”

“Me?”

“Yeah, you’re a woman, and if that’s what it is, then she sure as shit ain’t gonna want me prodding.”

“But she doesn’t know me.”

“But I do, and she trusts me. Please, Cricket.”

She agreed hesitantly. “Uh, sure, if that’s what you want.”

I held the screen open and motioned for her to go inside first, getting a faint whiff of the sweet pea that she wore since she was a teenager. “She shares a bathroom with her sister. It’s down the hall on the right.”

Cricket froze mid-stride and turned to me just as the door hit me in the ass. “Two girls…” Her words were a pained whisper that matched the agony on her beautiful face. I couldn’t believe she didn’t know. I would have sworn Ed and Lorna would have told her. Maybe she didn’t ask, didn’t want to know, which made more sense because I felt the same way about her life. Unless I was in it, I didn’t give a shit what she did or who she did it with.

“Yeah, I’ve got two daughters. Dixie Mae’s six and Aubrey’s twelve.”

“I’ll just, um, go see if she’s okay.”

Her lips rolled together, and then she went down the hall where I heard a quiet knock on the door and her speaking sweetly to Aubrey. After a second, she went into the bathroom, and I linked my fingers behind my neck and tilted my head, hoping to alleviate some of the pressure building.

When the light from the bathroom flashed into the hallway, I anxiously took two long strides and met Cricket just as she closed the door behind her. With a sympathetic smile, she took my hand and pulled me into the kitchen. The gesture was meant to separate us from Aubrey’s listening ears, but in those few seconds, I found myself calming from her simple and innocent touch, something only Cricket was ever able to accomplish. “She’s started her period, and she’s already cramping. It’s very scary the first time you cycle, and she clearly wants to be with her mother. I know you don’t want to call her, but I think you should.”

“Yeah, of course.”

“I’m gonna go now.”

I was powering my phone back on and Cricket walking away caught my attention. I called her name, and she turned around as I dialed Piper. “I didn’t forget what just happened.”

“You should.”

“Haven’t been able to get you off my mind for over a decade, Pixie, ain’t no way in hell that’s gonna happen now that you’re back.”

At the mention of her nickname, her jaw dropped.

“Hello?” Piper answered the call groggily, and I grinned at Cricket before I put the phone to my ear. “Hey, sorry it’s late, but I need you to come get Aubrey. She’s got her period.”

“Oh hell, can I talk to her?”

Cricket was heading to the door, but I quietly whistled, and she stopped. When she caught my eyes, I held up my finger for her to wait for a second, and then I strode down the hall. “Aubrey, your mom’s on the phone.” She opened the door and stuck her arm through, and I overheard her cry about blood and cramps.

While she was occupied, I took the time to go back to Cricket. “We’ll talk soon.”

“We don’t have to—”

“We’ll talk soon, Pixie.”

She nibbled on the inside of her cheek. “Okay, Mav.”

“Drive safe home.”

“I will. Good luck with Aubrey.”

I pushed open the screen for her and then waved when she started backing away. As much as I wished to spend more time with her, I had to take care of my kid, so I spun around and had just returned to the bathroom when Aubrey handed my phone back.

She peeked at me through the crack of the door. “She wants to talk to you.”

“What’s up?” I asked Piper as I headed back to the kitchen.

“I’m on my way. She’s embarrassed because she says her sheets are a mess. Please, don’t go in her room. I’ll get them when I get there.”

“I can wash her sheets. Don’t give a shit they’re stained.”

Piper sighed. “I know, and I appreciate that, but I really think it’s best if we respect her wishes on this. She’s humiliated. She doesn’t want you to see anything.”

I understood, I suppose. “Fine. I’ll get a trash bag ready. Anything else I can do?”

“No. I’ll be there soon.”

“The door’ll be unlocked,” I told her before I hung up. Walking back down the hall, I sat outside the bathroom door and waited a beat. “Can I get you anything, Aubrey?”

“No.”

What was I supposed to do? Should I say something, ignore it? “Listen—”

“Dad, just… don’t. Please,” she begged. “I don’t want to talk about it with you.”

“Okay.” I understood and was secretly relieved because if we did talk about it, surely I’d say the wrong thing. “What do you want to talk about then?”

“Who was that lady?”

Shit. I didn’t need her telling Piper I had a woman over. “She was an old friend who just got back into town. She stopped by to let me know. That’s all.”

“Oh. Is she your girlfriend?”

“No.”

“Just a friend?”

I banged my head on the wall. “She was my best friend in the whole world.”

“And she’s not anymore?”

“No. She left a while ago, and when she did, it hurt me a lot.”

“Oh.” She was quiet for another minute. “Did you forgive her?”

I never wished to see Piper more than I did at that moment. “This isn’t really something I want to talk to you about, kid.”

“Why not? You said she was just a friend.”

“I did.”

“But she wasn’t, was she?”

She couldn’t see me from where I was, and when I didn’t answer, she pushed the door open a little and stuck her head out. “No.”

“Did you love her?”

“Yes.”

“Did you love my mom?”

“Aub—”

“I’m not stupid, Dad.”

I sat up and crossed my legs. “I know you’re not. It’s just… this kind of conversation isn’t appropriate.”

“You didn’t. But Mom didn’t love you either, right?”

“No, she didn’t. And you’re right, I didn’t love her. But we both love you, and that’s all that matters.”

“I know. I’m not upset about it or anything.” She talked like she was way older than twelve. “I’m just curious because I’m trying to figure out if the boy—”

“What boy?” I growled. “You’re too young for boys.”

She rolled her eyes. “He’s just a friend.”

“Keep it that way.”

Her lips pursed as she winced. “My stomach hurts.”

“I’m sorry, sweetie. I wish I could help.”

“I’m just gonna sit here until my mom comes. It’s not personal, it’s just…”

“A girl thing. I understand.”

She smiled as best she could and then leaned back on the wall. “For what it’s worth, you’re a really good dad. Like, I know I didn’t grow up with you, but you’ve never made me feel bad about it, and I just, you should know that I really like being here, and I, I love you, too.” I couldn’t see her face anymore, and I was glad she couldn’t see mine because I didn’t even realize my eyes were wet until I blinked, and a single tear fell onto my lap.