CHAPTER 11

Maverick

 

It was girls’ weekend, and I stood in the driveway as Wilder finished loading up the trunk. “Call me if you need anything,” I told Frankie, who was holding one of her twins. “I mean it.”

“We’ll be fine, you worrywart.” She looked down at Dixie Mae. “Won’t we?”

My little girl put her hand on her hip and copied her aunt. “Yeah, Daddy, we’ll be fine, you worrywart.”

“Give me another hug.” I squatted down and held my arms out. She jumped into them and held on tight. This was going to be the first night she was away from me anywhere other than a family member’s house. Even though the girls’ night was with her aunt and her aunt’s sister, who was incidentally Aubrey’s mom, it was still new to me, and I didn’t like it. “I’m gonna miss you. Be good, okay?”

“I’ll miss you, too, and I’m always good.”

I kissed the top of her head, and she wiggled to get away. Shit, my throat fuckin’ itched, realizing how big she was getting, not needing her old man like she used to. Standing, I turned and crooked my finger for Aubrey, who was busying herself playing on her phone off to the side. She sighed, like it was an inconvenience to come to me, but I saw the little smile tugging at her lips. “Yes?” she asked when she got closer.

“Come here, kid.” I pulled her to me and gave her a hug, kissing the top of her head just like I did her sister. “I’ll miss you, too.”

“You already don’t see me half the month, Dad,” she argued jokingly, but I didn’t think that was funny.

I leaned back so I could look into her eyes that were almost identical to Dixie Mae’s, which matched mine. I sometimes still couldn’t believe I was blessed with two beautiful girls and wondered what I did to deserve them. “I miss the hell out of you when you’re not here, Aubrey. Don’t ever doubt that.”

“Really?” she asked in shock, but then caught herself and tried to put up her shield that I didn’t realize she wore so well until that moment. “I mean, uh… okay.”

I cupped the side of her face and placed my other hand on her shoulder. “Missed out on a lot of years with you, and I’m trying my best to make what time we do have count, but when you’re with your mom, I’m always thinkin’ about you, wondering what you’re doing, hoping you’re happy. So yeah, Aubrey, really, I miss you when you’re not here.”

“I… thanks.” She smiled, almost uncomfortably but appreciative, like she didn’t know what to make of my confession. I wasn’t the best at saying what I felt, so my words were new to her. “I like being at your house a lot, and when I’m not here, I miss it, too.”

“It’s not my house, sweetie. It’s your house, too.”

“Okay, Dad.”

I ruffled her hair, and she scoffed. “Go have fun. And look out for your sister, please.”

“I will.” I went back on a foot when she threw herself at me. “Love you.”

“Love you, too, kid.”

Wilder came over and handed me one of his daughters, and when I looked at her, it was uncanny how much she looked like Aubrey’s baby pictures. I suppose it wasn’t surprising that two brothers having babies with two sisters would create such similar characteristics. “Hey, Claire Bear.” I held my niece to my chest.

“Are you guys sure you’ll be okay?” Frankie asked for the tenth time, handing Meadow over to Wilder.

“Honey, they’re my daughters. Not only can I handle them alone for a night but I’ve also got Mav helpin’ me out. I can do two nights if y’all decide you want to stay the whole weekend. Just go, have fun. Pamper yourself. You deserve it.” Wilder kissed his wife while he held Meadow, and Frankie pushed up on her toes to kiss him back.

Piper made a gagging sound. “Aren’t you guys out of that honeymoon stage yet? Geez,” she joked.

“I’ll never be out of the honeymoon stage,” Wilder answered slyly. “And if I am, then I know I’m doing something wrong.”

Piper laughed and held open the back door to Frankie’s SUV. “Hop in, girls. We don’t want to be late.”

Dixie Mae was the first to climb up, and after Aubrey was in, Piper closed the door. “Have fun,” I told her. “But seriously, if you need something, let me know.”

Frankie and Wilder were on the other side of the vehicle, and Piper stared at me as I unconsciously bounced Claire. “You’re such a good dad. I can’t believe I fucked up so bad.”

“Pip—”

“No. Don’t. It just hits me sometimes how badly I ruined things, and I’m waiting for the day Aubrey starts to realize it and hates me for it.”

“We’ve been through this, Piper. It wasn’t all your fault. I didn’t let you tell me you were pregnant because I was such a dick, so it’s not all on you.” I patted Claire’s back when she started to get fussy. “We can’t keep digging up the past.”

She shook her head, then nodded. “I know. It’s just hard sometimes.”

“We’re doing the best we can now. That’s all that counts.”

“Yeah,” she huffed. “I suppose. Well…” She pulled herself up and into the passenger side when Frankie got in the driver’s seat. “Have a good night. We’ll be back tomorrow afternoon.”

Wilder and I stood on the porch while they drove away, and once they were gone, we went inside and entertained the twins. By the time seven o’clock rolled around, they were both finally down for the night, and Wilder and I were on the couch, exhausted. “I don’t know how she does that every freaking day,” he said in disbelief. “And somehow she manages to cook, and she works on top of it.”

“She’s pretty amazing,” I agreed. I wished I had a woman like he did when Dixie Mae was a baby, but instead, I ended up with a fuckin’ alcoholic who almost killed her when she drove drunk with her in the car. “You’re definitely lucky.”

“Don’t I know it.” He reached behind him and pulled out a stuffed animal, then tossed it across the room. “I’m not gonna push you, but you know I’ve gotta ask,” he said out of the blue.

I knew exactly what he was talking about, too. He hadn’t brought up Cricket since he came by with Hunter that one night. “What do you want me to say, Wild?”

“Nothing. I just wanna know how you’re doing with her being back?”

“It is what it is, right? I was fucked up when she left, and now she’s back. I’ve moved on, and so has she.” It still made my blood boil knowing that she was out with another man right at this moment. “She’s actually on a fuckin’ date with Austin right now.”

Wild sat up. “No way.”

“Yup.”

“How do you know that?”

“’Cause I was at the diner when he told her he’d pick her up at six tonight.”

He narrowed his eyes. “He said that loud enough for you to hear?”

“No, Cricket was taking Dixie Mae’s and my order, and he came up to her and interrupted us to tell her that before he left.”

“That motherfucker,” he gritted.

Yeah, he was, but Cricket wasn’t mine, so I had no reason to be mad about it. “Whatever.”

“Do you still love her?”

I didn’t want to talk about it, but considering Wilder understood a little bit of what I was going through because of his history with Frankie, I didn’t shut the conversation down completely. “She was my first everything, and I thought she’d be my last, so yeah, a part of me always will.”

“Have you actually talked to her since she’s been back?”

“A little.”

“I mean really talked. Where she finally explained things.”

I rubbed my hands down my five o’clock shadow. “It doesn’t even matter anymore.”

“Weren’t you the one who said mistakes can be forgivable if the intention was there?”

“Yeah, I said that to Frankie, and I meant it. Cricket didn’t have good intentions, so my point stands. What she did isn’t forgivable.”

“But, Mav, do you actually know why she left?”

Her parting words played like repeat in my mind, and no matter how many times I tried to find some type of justification in what she said, and I did it more times than I can even count, I always came to the same conclusion. “She was too good for this place, wanted someone better than me.”

“That’s what she said?”

“Not verbatim.”

“You’re fighting a losing battle, Maverick. Go talk to her, iron this shit out so you can move on one way or another.”

I shook my head. “I’ve moved on already.”

“Bullshit.”

“I have.”

“There hasn’t been anyone since her, and you know exactly what I’m talking about. She’s still got a hold on you, and until you figure out if you want her to let you go or grab on even tighter, you’ve gotta talk to her.”

Dammit, I hated when he was logical.

Even more, I hated when I listened to that logic.

Because less than an hour later, I was the one being illogical.

I didn’t know what I was doing, other than I had no right to, but that didn’t stop me from sticking my old key into the lock and turning it… and sure as shit, it worked. I opened the door to Cricket’s apartment and walked around, secretly hoping she was fast asleep but knowing she wasn’t close. My body had a way of sensing her nearness, and I could tell the apartment was void of her presence.

So I took the time to snoop and was highly disappointed at the lack of personalization. A few boxes were still stacked in the corner with photo albums on top, and the walls were bare. Aside from a bunch of clothes, not much else was in any of her drawers. With the exception of her computer and the piano, nothing indicated Cricket McBride lived here.

My finger traced the leather cover of one of her albums, and I saw my hand start to shake as I contemplated opening it. The realization that our memories may have been removed from the pages caused a dizzying pounding in my head and a twinge of pain in my chest.

I sat on the end of her bed and closed my eyes, thinking I was partially insane for breaking and entering, but I was never rational where she was concerned.

It was dark inside her apartment still, and I lost track of time until I heard footsteps on the stairs. I listened to her and Austin as they ascended, the back of my neck and my palms starting to sweat. Keys rattled, and then the door squeaked, and a flash of light came into the room long enough for me to see them standing just inside.

Bathed in the dark still, I scrutinized them. She was wearing a dress, and he was in a suit, and his hand was on her waist, pulling her closer to him. “I had a good time tonight.”

“Me, too,” she answered. “Thank you.”

“Maybe we can do it again without all that pesky business talk.”

She laughed, and I knew that laugh. She didn’t think he was funny. She was uncomfortable. “I don’t know. Things are still kind of… I’m adjusting to being home, and I’ve just gotten out of a relationship, so I just don’t think now’s a good time to date.”

“I always thought you were pretty, and time did nothing but make you more beautiful.” He hauled her against him, and I felt a bead of sweat drip down my back. “I’m not asking for anything permanent, Cricket. It can be as casual as you want.”

“Austin, I don’t think so.”

“Let me see if I can change your mind.” He leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers, and it only took a second before she was pushing him away.

And at the same time, I was on my feet. “Hands off before I do it for you,” I promised as I stalked across her apartment. The light from the hallway hit me as I grabbed Cricket by the arm and tugged her to me. I heard her gasp in shock, but her front collided with my side, and she didn’t push me away. In fact, she held on. I wrapped my arm around her waist and balled the other one in a fist, ready to pummel his face in.

Austin held his hands up in a placating gesture. “I apologize for reading things the wrong way.”

“You didn’t read shit the wrong way, asshole. You heard what you wanted to because I clearly heard her tell you no.”

He rocked back on his heels, then took a step away. “Like I said, I apologize.” He looked at Cricket huddled against me. “Are you okay with him if I leave?”

I growled at the implication, and Cricket tightened her hold. “I’m fine. Good night, Austin.”

“And don’t fuckin’ come back,” I added. “You know what will happen if you even think about trying, too.”

Without another word or glance, Austin slunk away with his tail between his legs, but I knew that was the end of him. He knew I’d annihilate him if he so much as looked at her funny. Cricket and I stayed just as we were until we heard his car start. She separated from me and then locked the deadbolt. Turning around, she raised a brow. My behavior wasn’t anything unusual, so while she might have been irritated, she wasn’t surprised. “How did you get in here?”

“Still had a key.”

“And you thought it was okay to let yourself in?”

I jerked my chin. “You got a problem with that?”

“I should have a huge problem with it.” She sighed and crossed her arms. “But I’m more grateful that you were here, so I can’t be too upset about it… Speaking of, why are you here?”

“I don’t know.”

And then she made a mistake. She licked her red lips, and it reminded me that Austin’s were just on them. I prowled to her and pressed my body against hers, so she was flush with the wall and reached between us. With my thumb, I rubbed over her lips to try to wipe him away, but her lipstick didn’t smudge. Snarling, I pushed it into her mouth and got the pad wet with her tongue and tried again. “Why won’t this shit come off?” I thundered.

“It’s a stain,” she muttered as best she could with my thumb smushing her lips.

“Then I’ll just have to erase his mouth another way.” I kissed her hard, my tongue tracing the seam before shoving its way inside. I nipped at her lips, licking them and demanding ownership. I fucked her mouth until she was panting and clawing at me, and I didn’t stop. I kissed her until her lips were swollen and raw and mine.

She was tugging at my belt, trying desperately to get my cock free, but that wasn’t what this was about. I grabbed her hands and held them above her head with one of mine shackling her wrists. She whimpered when I pressed my hips into her, my hard cock rubbing into her belly to hold her in place. “Please,” she cried, struggling to get friction between her legs. “Please, Mav… please.”

“No.” I spiked my fingers through her hair and fisted the short strands. “I’m not here to fuck you. I’m just going to kiss you until you forget anyone’s mouth but mine.”

“Austin barely even kissed me, and I didn’t even want him to. He—”

“You still remember his name, Pixie, so clearly I haven’t done a good enough job.” I slid my hand from her hair to her jaw while I continued my assault on her mouth as I held her in place so she had no choice but to accept it. I was punishing her for more than just tonight. Years of frustration made me keep her on edge and deny her the orgasm she was so desperate for.

It felt like hours, but the reality was it was minutes… long minutes, before she couldn’t take it anymore. She used all her might and ripped free, shoving me away. Her makeup was smeared and her cheeks pink, and her shoulders moved as she panted. “If you won’t do it, then I guess I’ll just have to.” She sauntered past me, removing her dress as she went, and then crawled onto the bed, her round ass in the air a dangerous temptation. Just as she rolled to her back, she reached between her legs and touched herself, her sleek wetness shining on her fingers.

“Shit,” I hissed. I loved watching her pleasure herself almost as much as I loved being the one to pleasure her. “Fuck.”

Her teeth sank into her swollen lip when her fingers circled her clit. “No, Mav. I asked you to fuck me, and you said no.

“I asked you to stay, and you said no, so it’s only fair you suffer a little bit, too.”

“Nothing about you leaving me in this state is fair.” Her back arched, and she moaned.

I walked to the side of the bed and unzipped my jeans. “Nothing about you straight up leaving me was fair, either.” Then flicked the button undone. “You coming back unannounced isn’t fair.” I freed my throbbing erection and fisted the shaft, rubbing the precum around the crown. “You kissing another man in front of me isn’t fucking fair.”

She watched me, and I watched her, and as much as I wanted to touch her, keeping my hands off made it almost hotter. “I didn’t kiss him, and I didn’t even know you… you were here,” she wheezed, her eyes getting dazed and her thighs trembling. It had been a while, but I knew she was close.

“Well, I am.” I jacked my cock harder, faster, and her hips circled. I wished my dick was inside her right then. I loved it when she moved like that, stroking my dick with that tight, wet pussy of hers like it was what she needed to breathe. “I came for you because I can’t fucking stay away.”

“I don’t want you to stay away,” she confessed. “I want you to come for me… God…” Her thighs fell open, and she slid two fingers inside. “Come, Mav. Come on me. Please. Mark me like you used to.”

I watched as her orgasm rolled over her, and when I felt my balls explode at how gorgeous she was, I angled my cock down and shot onto the mattress. She followed as my semen shot out and stained her sheets, purposely missing her skin. The pleasure that was on her face morphed into an ache I felt in my gut, but a twisted part of me liked that she was experiencing the same kind of torture I’d lived with since she married another man. “I only marked you because you were mine, and you’re not that anymore, so you don’t get that part of me.” I zipped back up, and before I lost my nerve, I turned my back to her and walked away.