After I finish bringing the last of my boxes into the basement, I lean against the floral wallpaper in the hallway. The frosted glass on both sides of the front door allow a small amount of light from the gray afternoon in. I stare at the door as the light fades. Molly will never walk through it again, and Jordan, Bella, and Timmy will return to a house with no mom and no wife.
No mom and no wife. That was the shape of our family. Our mom passed after battling cancer. Dad wasn’t an alcoholic until after mom passed. Cirrhosis caught him a decade ago. I can’t bear the thought of the cycle repeating itself.
Jordan wouldn’t do that. He wouldn’t let Bella and Timmy go through what we did.
Our dad probably hadn’t planned on becoming an alcoholic, either. It was the grief after a loss. My therapist once said that grief is just the extra love we never got to express. It was too much for my father to bear sober.
Jordan’s never loved anyone more than Molly—except the kids. When they come here, they’ll be faced with the empty space Molly used to fill. I have to be here for them. I have to make sure that doesn’t happen, but I can’t do what my brother asked and bring Bella home if she’ll be in danger. I pull the envelope from my jeans pocket and read it again.
They paid for what they did. Now it’s your turn.
Tell me the truth, Chelsea, or more will pay.
The house. Waterfront Road. Midnight.
I read it to Kellan over the phone as soon as I got it, and she said she’d come over after school so we can work through my options. I fold the letter and tuck it back in my pocket.
Passing the front door, I step into the small living room. I pace before the front window as the sky’s last champagne streaks fade. I check the driveway each time it comes in sight, counting the minutes since school’s been out.
Kellan’s black car drives down the street toward the house and I rush to the window.
No—not Kellan’s car. That’s Cam. What’s he doing here?
He parks on the road in front of the boulevard and gets out as the streetlights flick on. As he strides up the driveway, past my car, he takes a look inside.
“What are you doing here?” I whisper, peeking out the front window and taking a step back so he can’t see me.
Is he here to see Jordan again? For what?
He wasn’t shocked to see my car. It didn’t even phase him. How could he have known I was here? This is the last place he’d look.
I meet him at the front door as he knocks, every thought of avoiding the pain of confrontation overridden by curiousity. I open it and he strides in, not missing a beat. I step aside so he doesn’t bump into me.
“Cam? What’s going on?”
He gives me a cold look. “Were you expecting someone? You were right by the door.”
“Kellan’s coming over soon. Why?”
He turns back to me with a stoic look. “You’re not answering my calls.”
“I’ve been busy, Cam, and it’s been hard—”
He rests his hands on his hips. “Callie told me you came by the house today.”
I nod. “I came to get some of my things.”
“You didn’t try to see me.” He’s almost indignant.
Why is he being like this?
I close the door over and turn back to him. “How did you know I was here?”
He looks around and when he spots the living room, he walks in. He never just barges in anywhere. This is so strange.
I follow him. “Cam, you’re scaring me. I’m sorry for everything, okay? I should have come to you sooner about how I was feeling.”
“How long?” he asks with pain in his eyes. “How long have you known you didn’t want to be with me?”
I didn’t know—not really—until the blackmail letter came. In my heart, I’ve known I’m not good enough for him for most of our relationship. We met at the local café a few months after the night my friends were murdered. I couldn’t believe I was even interested in someone at the time, but he was so kind, and patient, and the distraction felt… not good, but more complete, with all I was missing.
Now, I feel like I’m standing across the room from a stranger.
I stop on the other side of the living room’s coffee table from where he stands, trying to decide on an answer that won’t upset him more. “I shouldn’t have said yes when you proposed.”
He shakes his head. “This isn’t like you. What’s going on with you? I know you’re hiding something from me.”
I crane my neck back. “Cam, I know you lied to me.”
He stares, frowning, shaking his head, but he doesn’t speak.
“Why are you here?” I ask. “How did you know I was here?”
Has he been following me?
“What did I lie about?” he asks.
I rest my hands on my hips and look around the living room that he so easily marched into, like he’s been here before. Because he has. “Cam, don’t play dumb.”
He presses his lips together and his eyes look up to the right, like he’s evaluating whether he should confess that he’s been here before to see my brother.
“Why did you do it?” I ask.
His expression changes, his face contorts as he squints at me. “You think you’re the only one who knows how to use people?”
“Use people—” I echo the sentiment his sister shared with me. “You—used my brother? For what?”
He frowns, shaking his head. “Your brother?”
“I know you were here to see him the other day.”
He rubs his hand over his mouth, shaking his head.
“Jordan told me—”
“Yeah, fine, I did.” He clenches his jaw.
“Cam, why did you just say you used my brother? And why did you lie about it?”
His nostrils flare as he stares with contempt, the living room almost void of light.
“Cam? Answer me.”
He rubs his chin and shakes his head, walking toward the front door. “I’m not doing this.”
“Not doing what?” I ask as he walks by.
He stops and looks back. “You know I was trying to get you the support you needed. I always tried, but it never made a difference.”
I freeze, blinking at him. “Cam, why did you come here? How did you know I was here? Have you been following me?”
My cell phone vibrates at my side as he shakes his head and strides to the door.
“I said I’m not doing this,” he says. “I’ve tried with you, and if you’re done with me, then fine.”
I follow him to the door as he opens it. “I know you tried to help me. I’m sorry. This isn’t your fault. I never meant to hurt you.”
“You’ve known for months now that you didn’t want to be with me, but you waited until now to tell me? That look.” He nods to me. “That’s the one I’m used to from you. It’s the look you give when you’re keeping something from me. When you’re lying. I wanted you to tell me what’s going on, but you won’t.”
“You followed me. Didn’t you?”
“I love you.” His chest heaves as he holds the door open. “I thought I’d try with you, one last time. Give you one chance to tell me the truth. I should have expected this.”
He leaves me in the doorway and I watch him stalk down the driveway to his car.
My cell phone vibrates by my side again.
Jordan: We’re being transferred to the children’s hospital tonight. Could you come before 8 to pick up some of the kids’ things?
Jordan: Could you also bring the file folder in my office cabinet labeled Health, Home, Auto, and Life Insurance please? Bottom drawer of the desk.
I look up from my phone as Cam drives off, and step back inside, out of the early evening chill, closing the door behind me. I jog upstairs to the office and tap Kellan’s name on my cellphone. I have to let her know I’ll be late. She should have been here by now, too.
“Hello, Chels?” she says.
“Hey, where are you right now?”
“I’m sorry, I’m still at the school—”
“That’s okay. I have to go to the hospital and bring my brother some things first.” I open the filing cabinet and scan through the folders.
“That’s okay. I’m going to be here for a little longer. Chels, I found out where Austin’s parents live. A coach friend of mine from another school had him on the football team. I looked up his alumni information, and I’m looking into it more now, but I think maybe I should go and see them.”
“What? No.”
“I’ll tell them I used to be friends with Austin a long time ago, and I was wondering if they knew where he was.”
I grab the folder and close the cabinet with my hip, running it back downstairs. “Kellan, this is risky. I don’t want you involved in this on that level.”
“The blackmailer wants to meet you at midnight. If we can find out who they are before then, we have some power.”
I know she’s right. It’s our only shot, but it doesn’t make it easier. “I should be there with you. Can you wait?”
“We don’t really have time, and you have to go to the hospital. Chelsea, I was thinking. Is there someone new in your life? Someone you met recently?”
“No, not that I can think of…”
“What about Oz?”
“Well, he’s not really new. We’ve known him for a year, now.”
“I just can’t help but wonder what triggered the blackmail letter. Try to think about anything you might have said to someone, even accidentally.”
“I wouldn’t have shared anything about that night, Kellan. I talked to Oz about the memorial, but that was it.” I stop by the front door, gripping the folder. “I appreciate it you doing this. Keep in touch. Let me know what you find out, and we’ll meet after, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Kellan.” I can’t hide the fear and desperation in my voice, and I don’t want to. She knows what happened to my family. I need her to stay vigilant. “Be careful.”
“I will.”